A/N: Please be prepared for a long- emo post by Momo. :) Don't forget to listen to the song with this update.

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Is it ever enough to just love somebody? 

When they up, do you just tell them, "I still love you";

When they forget how you feel, do you just say, "I still love you"; 

When they hurt you deliberately, do you go "I still love you"';

When they lose sight of you, do you brush it off with "I still love you?"

and hope that for all the times you tell them that you love them, they will remember why you chose them in the first place.

Hirai Momo, you completely forgot that love goes both ways. Making it work means the other has to say the same thing and mean it. Or you might as well just be their biggest fan - you know everything about them, know what they love and hate, but they barely know so much as your name. 

It is difficult to fall in love with a stranger when that stranger has taken a piece of your soul with them. There will always be a fragment of you with them - and that's why you gravitate towards them no matter how much you think you're over them, or how much you're okay with another person. 

Jennie still does that to me. A little. Like a shard of glass running across my arm that doesn't bleed but still hurts. 

But Mina, oh beautiful, storm-bringing Myoui Mina: She's the million pieces of broken glass I walk over every single day, over and over. And as much as it hurts me, I will walk over again and again, until the icy shimmer turns to a scarlet glaze.

Myoui Mina is independent to a fault. I swallowed the fact that she doesn't need me as inversely as i need her. She could go on without me, or anyone taking care of her. That's just how she was built: to stand alone, welcoming any person whom she crosses paths with, but it was difficult to keep up with her. Because really, you can't bring an umbrella into a hurricane.

I am coming to terms with the fact that while Mina adores being showered with affection and care, she is first and foremost, her own person; Mina thrives on solitude and is happy with it. She isn't lonely. Sometimes she just needs an avenue to express her frustrations - and that's where my listening ear comes in. 

Mina doesn't need a relationship, she just needs companionship. I offer too much affection and at times, the smothering kind; forceful even in the purest of intentions. The way fire has the tendency to embrace everything it comes into contact with, I had that in me. Fire doesn't know where to draw the line, it doesn't see what it's burning. 

So now imagine a firestorm inside a hurricane. Absolutely poetic in all sense, but lethal and nothing good comes out of it. 

We grew into each other, until we both found out what we were: completely different beings who were satiated differently. As much as we thrived on each other's common interests and similarities, our emotional capacities were unforgivingly polar. This was the exception to the rule, "Opposites attract." 

With this revelation, I wondered how the dynamic between Mina and I would work out, now that it was all clear. I wouldn't know what Mina felt unless we spoke; because the thing about Mina? She would rather brush it off than talk about it. 

From a movie I learned about "anticipatory grieving" which is basically trying to deal with the loss before it even happens - like you're arranging things for the people you're going to leave behind, because you know for sure that they're going to be a wreck when you die. 

If I could borrow the term and place it into an emotional funeral - the death of my relationship with Mina, I guess I was doing everything to anticipate the loss. 

It's a terrible cocktail when you have anxiety, you overthink, and you're a coward. There is nothing worse than digging your own grave - pun intended over imaginary scenarios - and therefore multiple funerals.

I was starting to doubt Mina's words when we first started dating. 

Don't think that you'll ever be a liability to me. I'm not the last person who hurt you.

You can bother me anytime.

I'm glad I can't explain what we have.

We've been through so much together. Here's to more years. 

We still have a long way to go, Momoring. 

It's funny when we say things when we're emotionally charged, and everything seems to turn out fine, romantic comedy-esque.

But then they wake up one day and are so disgusted by the thought of even having said those words to you at one point in their lives. It's amazing how fickle people are, and how deceitful the heart is. 

Which was why despite all the emotional wreckage we were going through, I tried to remember why I chose Mina. Beyond all the emotion I felt, I had admired her genuinely.  The infatuation was secondary. 

But I guess no matter how much I justified our serendipitous encounter, it wasn't the kind I could force. 

Maybe we really were soulmates. They don't stay, but they do reveal a better you. 

Myoui Mina was my soulmate, the moon to my sun. I love everything about her, from her caramel eyes that shone brightly, to her intoxicating smile that I could hear through the phone. The way she laughs just plays with my heart, and I repeat that recording over and over until my phone dies. I love the way she reasons out when I get upset over petty matters, and tells me to calm down. I love listening to her play the piano, especially when she sings over it. Her hands, her soft hands, talented hands that play so many instruments, hands that find their way into mine when we walk, or while we're watching a movie at the cinema; hands that play with mine and don't let go. I love it when she speaks, because she rarely does, and so I listen intently; She speaks and volumes of stories and experiences are woven into the air, and I listen; i sit there absorbing every word and every little thing that matters to her. Because that's what you do when you love them, right? You make sure you remember everything, down to the little things like what they order at Starbucks, or how much they've cried over difficult people, or that they wore their favorite shirt to a Christmas party, the one that had a cat and a book on it. Because really. What else do you do with someone you love? You love them for who they are, faults and all. 

You love them even when they forget.

You love them even when they want to forget.

You love them even when they start to hate.

That's all you have to do with your soulmate. You love them, endlessly.