"I don’t think I’ve ever been this crazy about a girl.” -Jung Hoseok

Chapter 15: In Comes the Beast and Out Goes the Prince

“Hey man,” Jimin put down his bag in a nearby empty seat as he made his way to the counter of Tae’s Tea. Taehyung grinned at his friend.

“Hey. What do you want today? Iced Americano?” he was using a towel to dry some mugs. 

“Yes please.” Jimin nodded. Taehyung put down his mugs and went to his coffee machine, making Jimin his order. Jimin watched his friend for a bit, noticing his broad shoulders drooping and his eyes a little sunken. He looked rather weary, and Jimin knew his payment for his drink today was going to be a counseling session.

“Thanks man,” Jimin gave Taehyung a pat once he received his fresh, cold coffee. He took a sip and was pleased, as always. He then leaned over the counter and made Taehyung look at him. 

“What?” Taehyung asked, feeling a little uneasy at Jimin’s intense gaze.

“How are you?” Jimin gave him a half smile.

“I’m...good?” Taehyung picked up his towel and mugs again.

“No you’re not,” Jimin blew a raspberry and took another sip before saying, “You can’t hide anything from me Taehyung-ah. I can see there’s something on your mind...is it about Minnie?” 

Taehyung stopped at that.

He looked at Jimin. He wanted to shake his head, telling his friend that he was wrong...but couldn’t. Because his stinkin’ best friend was absolutely right about him not being able to hide anything from him. And he was right about him feeling down due to Hamin.

“Yeah,” he ended up admitting in a quiet voice. Jimin wanted to give him a hug seeing his downcast face.

“Are things not going well? Did she reject you?” he asked, a little cautious but wanting to hear it all.

“No but…” Taehyung trailed off and put down his work again. He sighed, not knowing where to begin.

Taehyung had been doing some thinking, much like many of the characters in this story. He thought about the words he said to her, the things he did to her...the messy state he was in because of her. Something deep within him was telling him to stop. To stop being so selfish because that wasn’t who he was. Kim Taehyung was always Hamin’s oppa—the caring and loving person who waited for her. He was not some guy who forced the girl he adored to look at him, or like him back. He wasn’t selfish. And that was his charm, or one of many.

He was the gentle Prince Charming, after all. 

The night he waited for Hamin’s call and ended up calling and texting her a tad too much, it struck him that perhaps he was chasing after someone who wasn’t even looking in his direction. Someone who was already preoccupied with someone else. And so Taehyung began to see that his fear of losing Hamin to someone—someone like Jung Hoseok—was turning him into an ugly, possessive, and forceful person. And he’d rather be Hamin’s caring oppa, even if it meant he couldn’t have her.

So as much as it pained him, Taehyung had slowly decided it was maybe time to let go. 

But that was once he was certain Hamin had her eyes fixed on Jung Hoseok. Taehyung wanted her happiness more than anything.

“But what?” Jimin asked softly, waiting for Taehyung to go on.

“...I don’t think I want to keep this up. I’m going to let Hamin go and let her be happy,” Taehyung summarized his thoughts.

“Wait what?” Jimin had a puzzled face.

“I don’t want to burden her with my feelings anymore. As much as I hate seeing her go to someone else, I don’t want to be someone that holds her down and makes her feel bad or unhappy in any way. I think…” Taehyung took a deep breath. “That’s the right thing to do.”

Jimin remained silent, soaking in Taehyung’s words. He was amazed at how his friend could just do that, and it made him reflect on his own feelings for Cindy. Could he do the same for her if she had begun to like someone else, hopefully not Jeon Jungkook?

“You know, this is exactly why I approved of you, Taehyung-ah. I mean, I support my sister’s decisions, but oh my. Minnie Mouse is losing a pure gem,” Jimin shook his head, looking at Taehyung with eyes of respect. Taehyung laughed at his friend’s response.

“Thanks Jimin-ah,” he went back to dry his mugs, thoroughly wiping away all the moisture in them as if he was wiping away any thoughts that got in the way of his decision for what to do.

He needed to let go of Hamin as quickly as possible. Maybe he could catch a meal with her soon enough.

***

“Taehyung oppa!” Hamin ran towards Taehyung, her bag slipping off her shoulder. Taehyung nearly had to catch her from almost tripping as she abruptly halted to a stop.

“Whoa there, I told you no rush Min-ah,” Taehyung chuckled, his large hands gently holding Hamin’s shoulders in place. Hamin took a moment to catch her breath.

“I didn’t want to be late for our dinner da—appointment,” Hamin caught herself from almost saying the word “date.” She learned from Cindy the hard way that that word shouldn’t be thrown out too easily, especially when around someone like Taehyung. Someone who was still waiting for her answer. 

             “It’s okay, Min-ah. Waiting for you isn’t a problem at all,” he smiled, his eyes soft. He reached out to fix a strand of hair out of place on Hamin’s face, but she quickly pulled back.

“I got it, thanks,” she smiled weakly as she removed the hair herself. Taehyung’s hand hovered awkwardly in the air for a second before he dropped it to his side and into his pocket, helplessly feeling a bit bitter at her small rejection. Hamin cleared .

“Well, are you hungry? Because I am. What should we eat?” she tried to get to business. After all, she had come to eat with Taehyung, after hours of thinking, in hopes to make herself clear. To give him that answer he’d been waiting for. Truthfully, Hamin had been thinking about how to explain herself. It was certain that she had been wanting to give Taehyung a chance. And she was going to. 

But that’s before Mr. Jung Hoseok began to enter into heart. She didn’t want to admit it, but the way he had been acting towards her gave her butterflies. And with Cindy constantly yapping at how “Jung Sajangnim” clearly liked her and what not, Hamin had been more aware of the subtle changes of Hoseok’s behavior towards her. How his coldness thawed into a tenderness that made her flutter. 

She had to say something now. She didn’t want to hurt the oppa that practically raised her alongside Jimin, but she didn’t want to wait...because that would hurt him more. 

It was funny how fast things changed, but that was how it often was with feelings. Just like Hamin’s mind changed about giving Taehyung a chance, the beast himself had changed his mind about taking things slow in winning Hamin’s heart. In fact, he was now probably thinking about how to make his feelings clear soon...

“How about some pho? I could use something to warm me up,” Taehyung suggested. Hamin nodded. That was an excellent choice. It was quite common for her and Taehyung (and Jimin too usually) to get pho from time to time, especially because there was an amazing pho place a couple blocks from Tae’s Tea. And with the season slowly changing to colder temperatures, pho sounded really good.

“I love it,” Hamin grinned assuringly and the two were headed off.

Buzz.

Hamin and Taehyung were making their way towards the pho place when Hamin heard her phone buzz. She took it out and realized she had three missed calls from Hoseok, including a text. She gulped as it only occurred to her now that she ran out of the cafe without even explaining to Hoseok where she had to go.

Shoot, she palmed her head as her eyes read the text.

You know, I’d really appreciate it if you told me where you’ll run off to next time. See you tonight Hamin-ah. 

She quickly typed.

I’m so sorry Mr. Jung! I won’t be late to work! Thanks for understanding.

Then she slipped her phone in her bag so she could give her full attention to the man walking alongside her, who was curious as to who she was even texting. He didn’t want to question it, and he didn’t want to know, even though he was already half certain it was someone named Jung—

“Here we are,” Hamin interrupted his thoughts, “It’s been so long since we last came, right oppa?”

“Yeah,” Taehyung forced a smile, holding the door open for the two of them. They entered and quickly found seats.

“Two number sevens please,” Taehyung already knew what the two were going to get. Hamin nodded with a smile as she added, “And a plate of egg rolls please.”

“Anything other than water to drink?” the waiter asked and both Taehyung and Hamin shook their heads.

“Alrighty. I’ll have your order ready soon,” the waiter got up to leave. 

Once the waiter was gone, silence fell upon the two. Hamin played with the straw in her water cup and Taehyung just looked at her, biting his lip. It had been some time since the two of them had gone out. It had been some time since they were alone like this. 

“Min-ah,” Taehyung began. Hamin looked at him and gulped, keeping her gaze on him.

“Hm?” she raised her eyebrows, urging him to go on.

“You know that night...when I asked you to call me after you were done with work?” he asked, his voice deep and quiet. Hamin’s hands froze as she recalled the night her phone was bombarded with messages and calls from Taehyung. She thought they were past it all after she briefly texted him, telling him she was fine.

Well, clearly not. 

But this, of course, was Taehyung’s start of sorting things out...and Hamin had no idea what he was about to say.

“Yeah?” she ended up responding.

“Were you…” Taehyung took a deep breath as he finished his question that had been buried inside of him for a while now.

“...with Jung Hoseok the whole night?”

Please say no… Taehyung couldn’t help but plead inside his head. But he already suspected that the answer wasn’t at all going to be what he wanted. It was almost obvious that she had spent the night at Hoseok’s. And if Hamin answered to confirm his thoughts...then Taehyung knew—as much as he hated it—that it was time to do what he had slowly been preparing for: letting go.

Of her.

Hamin couldn’t respond. She just opened slightly and all she could do was slightly nod. Taehyung let out another breath as he lowered his head. 

“Oppa...it was just that he needed extra help sleeping that night and so I sang to him until he fell asleep. I didn’t mean for myself to fall asleep too…” Hamin trailed off, worried that Taehyung was upset. 

“It’s okay, you don’t have to explain,” Taehyung raised his head and looked into Hamin’s eyes full of concern. He let out a smile almost out of defeat as he continued.

“Min-ah. I want to apologize for being such a selfish jerk. I have no right to hold onto you when you’re not expected in any way to like me back. Your feelings were never guaranteed in the first place. I just…” Taehyung stopped as their order had come. Hamin had been listening quietly, her heart thumping as she took in what Taehyung was telling her. 

“Here is your food. Enjoy,” the waiter smiled, not knowing or picking up the serious mood surrounding the two. Taehyung thanked him and picked up his chopsticks.

“I just… didn’t want to admit the fact that I would lose you to a guy that didn’t know you as much as I did. Because I was first. And I had been with you since you were little, literally watching you grow up. I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you, but I realized that was too much to expect on my part. I don’t want to burden you Min-ah. If you need to say no to me, don’t ever feel bad for doing that,” Taehyung couldn’t seem to stop. His voice was beginning to break.

“It’s going to be hard but I’m going to let you go.”

“...”

Hamin stared at Taehyung, speechless at his speech. She of course had no idea he would bring up this matter himself...when she herself was the one wondering how she should mention her feelings towards  him. It was as if Taehyung just knew her thoughts, like he always did. No one knew her like he did. Which was why it hurt Hamin too, to say no to him.

“I don’t know what to say…” Hamin ended up responding, not knowing exactly how she was to react. Taehyung nodded and gestured to her bowl.

“You don’t need to say anything. Just eat, Min-ah. Your noodles will get bloated.” He reached over and placed three pieces of jalapenos into her bowl, just the way she liked it. He even gave her his lime, which she loved and he didn’t, all the more proving and assuring her that he will always be her oppa, even if things didn’t turn out the way he had hoped. Hamin felt a wave to gratitude overwhelm her as she looked at him, knowing Taehyung wasn’t the guy to pressure or force her into anything. He was consistently her caring, affectionate, and supportive oppa.

And there was no doubt she treasured him with all her heart...just not in the same way she did for Hoseok.

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