It took a few minutes to catch my breath again and register everything he had told me. Once I had, I picked up my phone and texted Tao. 

tell me where u r, i’ll come alone

While I was waiting for his response, I swapped my hoodie and sweatpants for a t shirt and ripped jeans. I also dug into my backpack to find my earbuds. When my phone vibrated, I was thrilled to see that Tao had responded. 

not sure, I took a bus.

Along with the text was a picture of his basketball shoes suspended over railroad tracks. One of the wooden planks had a pink heart spray painted on it.

i know where u r, will b there in thirty

I typed in and made my way down to the lobby with leftover bus tickets in my pockets.

When I burst through the Plaza doors and into the hot Colorado air, it hit me how much I had missed my home. I put my earbuds in and started up some good old American rap, walking to the nearest bus stop.

Getting there was easy; a twenty minute bus ride and about five minutes walking to the outskirts. However, I tried to avoid sketchy people to the best of my ability, which added about ten minutes to my journey. When I saw Tao sitting on a cement wall above a railroad I sighed in relief and made my way over to him.

He helped me up next to him without a word or a smile and put his arm around my shoulders. I leaned my head on his in turn and got the impression that conversation was not needed; he just needed me to be there with him.

Sure enough, after a few minutes, he was shaking and trying to hold his tears in. I gave him a big hug and he buried his head in my chest. “Let it out,” I whispered.

He only cried for a few minutes before looking back up at me. “I’m sorry,” he said. “对不气. It should’ve been me defending you last night, not Luhan. I should have tucked you in and wiped your tears away. I should have eaten breakfast with you, not ran out halfway through.”

I looked at him. His eyes were dry now, and it was the first time I remembered seeing him without makeup. When he sat up straight, it struck me how tall he was as well.

To me, he was less like the King of China and more like a human.

He put his arm back around my shoulders. “Luhan told me what happened last night in the limo. None of it is true. If you want me to, I can go find her and beat her up.”

And just like that, it was my turn to cry. The memories of her words stung me again, like a hive of wasps. The numbness had left me. Tao held me close to him and my hair softly until I was out of tears to cry. I stayed for a second, listening to the sound of his heartbeat, and opened my blue eyes to look up at him.

“I forgive you. But don’t let it happen again.”

He exhaled and smiled his first real, genuine smile that I had seen. His teeth were white and shiny, like pearls. Our eyes met and he mesmerized me again, like a snake charmer; anything he said, I would obey. His wish was my command. His eyes wandered around my face, studying me like I was a piece of art in a museum. Then, slowly, he lifted his hand to my skin and trailed a finger down my jawline. He tilted his head ever so slightly and leaned in towards me. Gradually, I felt his soft, warm breath hitting my lips. It smelled like hot chocolate on a winter day. We lingered there for a minute, our noses brushing each other curiously, trying to soak in every feeling. Our lips were mere millimeters away from touching, our eyes shut in sensual heaven…

The next events happened so fast.

There was an ear splitting crack and I felt something whizz past the back of my head, so close that the wind from it ruffled my hair. Tao’s reflexes were much quicker than mine; he held onto me strongly and fell backwards onto the hard gravel behind the wall. The impact knocked all the air out of my lungs, and I struggled to breath as fear trickled into my heart. What I finally realized were bullets began to pepper the cement wall we had been on seconds ago. At least now we were sheltered, thanks to Tao’s quick thinking. Large chunks of cement and clouds of dust were flying everywhere. One hit my head and I cried out in pain.

Tao threw his hood over his head and climbed on top of me, bracing his back and putting his arms over the back of his skull. Both of us began to cough, dust and smoke getting caught in our throats.

As suddenly as it had started, the shooting stopped. I could hear Tao’s heavy, pained breathing and the sounds of approaching sirens as the dust began to settle around us.

“Get up, Tao,” I whispered to him urgently. “Come on. Are you alright?”

He rolled off of me and onto his side, eyes shut and pain on his face. At first glance, I didn’t see any blood. He moaned loudly and opened his eyes to a squint.

“Help me up,” he choked out. I squatted down and he threw one arm over my shoulders as we stood cautiously, still covered by the wall. Then he leaned on it, slouched down and coughing once more.

Silently, I lifted up his hoodie to check for blood. His chest and back had a few cuts. Bruises were forming from his shoulders down to his tailbone and over his abs. I gently placed a hand on them and he flinched.

I lowered his hoodie again and gave him a soft hug from behind.

Tao had saved my life.

***

An hour and a half later, I was getting checked up in the hospital. Despite Tao and I assuring the authorities we were fine, they insisted on taking us in the ambulance to check for broken bones, cuts, and concussions. Once the nurse had finally taken my blood pressure and agreed to discharge me, I walked down the long hallway of the ER and into the waiting room.

Unsurprisingly, Yixing, Kris, and Luhan were already sitting and waiting for us, accompanied by a scowling Zhongrui and Mingsan. I walked in and Luhan and Yixing jumped up, looking incredibly worried, and walked over to me. Kris eyed me warily and stayed seated, refusing to take his eyes off of me.

“What happened?” Yixing asked. 

“Are you okay?” Luhan said at the same time.

As if on queue, Tao walked in behind me and put a hand on my shoulder. “There was a shooting, and we’re fine.”

Mingsan stood immediately. “Huang Zitao,” he said, anger lighting in his eyes. “We are here for a reason, you know! You’re a celebrity! You can’t just storm out whenever your mood changes for the worse, it’s a security concern for this exact reason!”

“Calm down,” Tao said, frowning. “I don’t know who the gunner was, but if they were trying to get me, their aim was really bad. They were at very close range, they could have hit me easily - I’m a tall target. If they were aiming for someone, it was Luna, not me.”

The silence that ensued was deafening. I sighed and told everyone the same story I had told the police; I had received a few death threats, which I thought were empty promises, over Instagram after the concert. The shooter had probably been one of Tao’s crazy fans.

Zhongrui sighed and Mingsan rolled his eyes. “Regardless, from now on, you do not leave without one of us. Got it?”

Tao bowed deeply and promised. Then we all departed, sandwiched between the two bodyguards again. The good old limo was waiting for us in a front spot of the parking lot, and we departed for the hotel once again with a bottle of ointment for Tao to put on his bruises.

I had never felt so anxious to get back to a hotel; however, when I was finally alone in my room, I collapsed on my bed and let out a huge scream into my pillow. How was this even fair? Near death encounters were not justifiable with dating a man that I liked. If Tao had been anyone else, it never would have happened - it was crazy to think about. Frustrated, I turned over on my bed so that I was on my back and began to pout. Why did jealous girls have to be so insane? Why did girls in general have to be so mean? I was hungry - besides my measly piece of toast this morning, I hadn’t had anything to eat these last 22 hours aside from airplane meals. I was thirsty, but I didn’t want to get up and fill a cup with water. I was angry, but that wasn’t ladylike. I was sad, but sad people are no fun to hang out with. I felt like I was about to implode like fireworks on the Fourth of July.

There was only one thing to do when I felt like that.

I got up and walked over to my suitcase, digging to the bottom and pulling out my $1700 Powell Sonare 505 flute. Gently, I sat the case on my bed, opened it, and began to assemble it’s silver parts. Then I walked over to the window and looked out at the city, raising in to my lips.

I had no idea what to play. I hadn’t touched my flute in over a week, which meant I couldn’t sound that great. After staying there for a minute, pondering what to play and gathering the courage to actually do it, I chose Meditation from Thais.

I took in a deep breath, set my embouchure, and played. It definitely wasn’t my best tone, but it wasn’t quite as bad as I thought it was gonna be either. I dumped my soul into the short piece; starting quiet, growing louder, more disturbed, backing back down again. My fingers flew over the keys with grace and my air hit every single note until I lifted the mouthpiece off of my face.

Sure enough, I already felt much better.

As I laid my flute down carefully on the bed, a knock came from the door. I moaned slightly - I still hadn’t brushed my hair, and it know dried and looked even messier than before. I hadn’t put on any makeup, so my face was probably pale and colorless. Nonetheless I went to open it a crack and see who it was.

To my surprise, it was Kris.

“May I come in?”

My jaw dropped and my mouth was wide open for a split second. Then I regained my footing and nodded, opening the door for him. He had a steaming cup of ramen in one hand and a pair of chopsticks in the other. Briskly, he walked to my bedside table and put them down.

“You can shut the door. I’m not here to kill you.”

Without another word, I closed the door and followed him back into my room, still trying to get over the shock. Why was he here?

He glanced at the bed and saw my flute, still fully assembled and reflecting the sunlight like a mirror. He cleared his throat. “May I sit?”

Hastily I put my flute away and tucked the case back into my suitcase as he sat on my bed. Then I pulled up a chair from the kitchen area to sit across from him. If he was here, it was probably to talk about something remotely important.

First, he handed me the cup of ramen on the table with the chopsticks. “I never travel without them,” he said, less cold than usual. “Chinese ramen is the best ramen I’ve found. Korean a close second. Japanese just doesn’t do it for me, not enough spice.”

I took the ramen and the chopsticks and peeled the top all the way off of it. He had already added the boiling water, and the noodles had softened and expanded a little. There were mushrooms, corn, peas, and other vegetables floating in the red liquid. I nodded to him as a gesture of thanks and then used the chopsticks to grab a few noodles and devour them. 

Kris watched me carefully. Once I was about halfway through, I sat the cup back on the table mouth and wiped my mouth unladylike on the sleeve of my shirt. A slight grin came on his face. Then I leaned back, stretching out my legs slightly, and studied him in return. He was dressed nicely, probably in preparation for the call tonight - a simple white hoodie, ripped blue jeans, and white basketball shoes. 

“So, given our past I’m assuming you didn’t just come here out of the kindness of your heart to give a hungry girl some noodles?” I asked, getting straight to the point. “What do you want?”

He sighed. “You know, I’m not as much of an as you make me out to be,” Kris said. “Tao is actually much worse of a person. He’s selfish and hungry for money and power and fame. Those have always been the most important things to him - he’s always been after them. He’s gotten better over the years, but still. It comes out from time to time.”

“So you’re trying to dissuade me from dating him now?”

Kris leaned forward and intertwined his fingers, looking directly into my eyes with his piercing stare. “Yes. I am. Tao isn’t good for you - you’re too easy for a guy like him to manipulate and take advantage of. I know I’m biased, but with all honestly, he is not a good guy. He isn’t boyfriend material. You aren’t good for Tao, either. You’re gonna bring his popularity down and crush his fans, who are in love with him. If you’re going for money, you should go for Luhan or Yixing. Even me. Not Tao.”

Now I was offended. What the ? I leaned forward towards him, intertwining my fingers the same way he had. “I don’t need you trying to get into my brain and tell me who is or isn’t good for me. Tao doesn’t either. He’s old enough to make his own decisions, and he knows what he’s getting himself into. He isn’t using me. And I am not using him. If I was in it for the money, I would have gone after Luhan. He’s the richest by far. If I was in it for the fame, I would have gone after you. You’re the most popular in the US. If I was after looks, Yixing is the obvious choice. Have you seen him? I know that . I like Tao, because he makes me happy and I feel comfortable around him -”

Kris stood up, visibly frustrated. “He’s not in it for the right reasons, though. You have to trust me.”

I stood up to meet him, still offended. “How would you know?”

“He’s a narcissist for God’s sake! Have you ever listened to his lyrics?”

“He’s a celebrity! He needs to write what he needs to write!”

Kris looked down at me, his lips pursed and his eyebrows furrowed, at a loss for words. I met his eyes fiercely, but then I backed up. There was something there that I had never seen before, despite all of our visual conversations; powerlessness.

I furrowed my eyebrows now, confused. 

He took a step towards me, and I took one back, stumbling into the chair. He took one more and I fell into it, suspense filling my heart. What was about to happen?

Kris put his hands on the top corners of the chair and bent down towards me, tipping the chair backwards onto its back two legs. His eyes were still locked on mine, now on my level, and more emotions began to flood into them; sympathy, regret, protectiveness. His gaze, which was normally guarded, was letting me see all of his feelings. Then, without the slightest bit of hesitation, he leaned forward even more and touched his lips to mine.

My brain erupted with thoughts. What the heck? Doesn’t he hate me? What about Tao? Maybe he really is trying to protect me? Is this a trap? Should I pull away? His lips were locked onto mine, strong and soft at the same time. His eyes were shut, but his eyebrows were still furrowed; he was savoring this moment. To my surprise, I didn’t feel myself fighting him. I knew I was being disloyal to Tao, but Kris demanded attention and respect as his nose touched my cheek and his hair fell out from behind his ear, brushing my face.

At last, he pulled his lips away from mine, keeping his eyes shut for a minute. Then he opened them, leaned my chair back forward and stood up straight, looking down on me. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have assumed things about you. But please, take my word. I love Tao, yet I doubt he could ever love you. Just…” he sighed again, tucking his hair behind his ear again. “Be careful. Don’t get hurt.” Without another word, he turned and walked out, leaving me more confused then I had ever felt before.