Kyungsoo was a little tired and his head was starting to ache as he rested it on Jongin’s shoulder, but mostly he was just bored and anxiously awaiting being able to leave the damn hospital finally. He was clean and dressed and his darling husband had already packed up his things, so now it was a waiting game. The nurse still needed to bring him his discharge paperwork and prescription for his headache medication, as well as show Jongin how to properly wrap his head so his wounds stayed clean. It seemed like a bit of overkill to him, but he was a house husband and chef not a medical professional so what did he know? They also needed to wait until Baek and Chanyeol got there to pick them up and so the married couple could tease them about what Tansy had apparently seen, the former of which got him wondering. How in the holy hell are all four of them going to fit in the truck? One of them was going to have to freeze for two hours riding in the bed, and since Jongin was the most solid he’d probably be it. Baek was skinny and too much of a city boy, Chanyeol with his height might be the best choice but he was driving, and there was no way in hell anyone would let Kyungsoo himself either drive or sit in back with a head injury. It made sense, especially with the cowboy being a natural furnace, but he was selfish enough he wanted his husband with him on the two-hour drive home.

                Finally the nurse came in, carrying some papers and a stuffed plastic bag. She smiled at the couple as she set her things down and went for the hand sanitizer and a pair of gloves.

                “I know I’ve said it before, but you two look so good together. Okay Mister Kim, ready for your quick lesson? Oh don’t look so scared. It’s really simple, and I included instructions in Mister Do’s discharge paperwork. There will also be a home nurse coming out every couple of days to check and see how everything is going. Yes, we’re aware of how far away you live, but there happens to be one nursing company that works in that general area. You’ll still have to make the drive here for your follow-up appointments I’m afraid Mister Do, and the doctor doesn’t want you driving at least until he sees you next week.”

                Kyungsoo turned to Jongin while the nurse prepared what turned out to be a fluffy roll of gauze. “Do you think Chanyeol or Missus Holland will be able to drive me?” He’d been hoping he’d be cleared so he wouldn’t have to inconvenience anyone, but apparently that was not to be.

                “Oh probably, or there’ll be someone else. The hands all drive or we’ll scare up someone in town in exchange for gas money. Don’t worry Sweetheart, you won’t miss your appointments.”

                The nurse looked as though she wanted to say something, no doubt some smart or well-intentioned comment about why Jongin couldn’t take him himself, but she managed to stay professional and only ask if they were ready.

                The demonstration really was simple. The nurse had simply made a couple of light layers of gauze over the top of his hair, then securely wrapped the rest around the sides of his head to keep the gauze in place. It wasn’t even uncomfortable, just odd feeling.

                “There! You’re all set until tomorrow. The nurse should be out around lunchtime then if you want to wait on a shower, your first doctor appointment is set up for a week for today, and your pills will be waiting for you downstairs. Do you have any questions?”

                “Just one. Our ride isn’t here yet, so may we stay in the room or do we have to move?”

                “Unfortunately, there’s someone in ER waiting for this bed so we have to kick you out so housekeeping can clean it, but you can certainly wait in the lounge. No one ever uses it, so it’ll be quieter than going downstairs. Transport should be here any time now, so just let them know. If there’s nothing else, I’ll be off.”

                “No, I think that’s it. Thank you.”

                The nurse smiled, used more hand sanitizer and left. Kyungsoo was certainly not going to miss that smell. Hell he could practically taste the it was used so often. He rubbed his forehead where he knew there were no wounds, while Jongin skimmed his discharge instructions.

                “These seem simple enough, keep your wounds clean, change the gauze daily, no driving, try to avoid standing or bending over, and no vigorous activity.” Jongin looked up with a pout. “I guess this means no celebratory bed-breaking tonight.”

                “I’d probably fall asleep in the middle to be honest. I guess we can handle a few more days, or maybe you’ll just do all the work.” Kyungsoo gave a wicked grin.

                “Your wish, my command, and we really should change that coffee mug to Save a Horse, Ride a Chef.” Jongin’s eyes sparkled as he smiled mischievously in return, only to lean over and peck Kyungsoo’s lips.

                “That’s all I get?” the injured man pouted, only to get gently pulled forward and end up with his mouth full of his husband’s tongue, to which he gladly returned, only for the couple to be startled apart by a rather deep voice asking

                “Mister Do? Ready to go? Oh fu, uh sorry, didn’t mean to interrupt!”

                Kyungsoo looked up at the big, beefy bald man in scrubs, hands resting on the handles of a wheelchair, and with a face that could probably fry eggs. He managed to keep a straight face as he answered.

                “We’re only going as far as the lounge for now. Our friends aren’t here to pick us up yet and the nurse said it would be quieter than downstairs, and I’ve got a headache.” He gently touched the bandage around his head.

                “Uh, oh sure Mister Do. No problem. Do you need help getting in?”

                “I think I’ve got it if you just hold it still.”

                Kyungsoo slowly stood and with a few trial and error moves managed to plop himself in the wheelchair, which he thought was ridiculous. His legs weren’t injured and he could walk just fine, if slowly. It was hospital policy though, so he kept his grumping to himself as Jongin handed him their coats and gathered up the rest of his things to follow the still-red transport guy out of the room and down the hall to the lounge, which had a few tacky, itchy-looking orange chairs and a couple of bookcases with the saddest-looking collection of paperbacks he’d ever seen.

                “I’m George, so when your friends get here have someone at the nurses’ desk page me and I’ll wheel you down.” He locked the wheelchair’s brakes and left.

                “Must be straight” Kyungsoo commented dryly, as Jongin flopped the bags into a chair and took the short man’s coat to toss on top and threw his own jacket on another chair, only to curiously wander over to examine the books, taking out one or two to study further.

                “Poor guy. He really doesn’t know what he’s missing. No wonder no one ever uses the lounge. I think the latest of these books is from nineteen seventy-two, and those chairs are as picky as they look. Should I dig the cards out instead?”

                “Might as well since we don’t know when Baek and Chanyeol will get here.”

                Kyungsoo and Jongin were deep in a hand of gin when a cacophony of voices caught their attention and they looked up to see an excited Tansy charging toward them, dragging Baekhyun behind her as she called out “Kai! Kunthu!” Following more slowly was an angry-looking Chanyeol, who kept turning to shove away a pretty, ridiculously slender, dirty-blonde Korean man Kyungsoo had never seen before.

                “Bloody ing hell, I’ll kill him!” Jongin hissed just loud enough for the injured man to hear, before turning on his beautiful smile and rising to scoop up Tansy, who had let go of Baekhyun’s hand and was about to run into the cowboy’s legs.

                “Hi Kai! Kunthu, you okay? Why ith your head like that?” Tansy greeted Jongin with a hug around his neck, before turning to Kyungsoo, looking worried.

                “I’m fine Tansy. My cuts just haven’t healed all the way yet, and the doctor doesn’t want them to get dirty from the horses so I have to keep my head wrapped like a mummy for a couple weeks.”

                “Oh.” Tansy turned back to Jongin. “Put me down pleath Kai.”

                Once she was back on her feet, Tansy came over to Kyungsoo and indicated she wanted him to bend down so she could whisper in his ear. “That man thays heth a friend of Kaith, but Elfie don’t like him. I don’t either. Heth mean, but wouldn’t get out of the van when Elfie told him too. He pinched me, then lied and thaid he didn’t. Elfie didn’t believe him though.”

                Kyungsoo nodded at Tansy’s explanation, then whispered back the only person he could think of who might trigger his mild-mannered husband and the goofy clown of a bar owner, “is his name Taemin?” At the little girl’s nod, the injured man suddenly understood Chanyeol’s hostility and Jongin’s outburst of profanity. So that was Taemin, who was now trying to cut in closer to Jongin who was now standing next to Kyungsoo’s wheelchair, and blocked by a somewhat confused Baek and incredibly angry bar owner, while Tansy held the injured man’s hand and glared at the unwanted intruder.

                “Why are you here Taemin? How the, how did you even find me?”

                “I heard my boyfriend was in the hospital, so I had to come and make sure you were all right. You were quite naughty running away like that and not telling me where you were so I could come get you once you were done with your little temper tantrum after our last lovers’ quarrel. You’ve had your fun playing hide-and-seek, but it’s time to go back home if you’ve been released. You do look good though. Playing cowboy almost suits you.” Taemin his lips, and Kyungsoo had an urge to both punch him and vomit, at the same time.

                “And I see you’re as crazy and stupid as ever, and only hearing and believing what you want to. Soo, plug Tans’ ears for me please.” The injured man pulled the little girl into his lap and covered her ears, while Jongin spoke in a low hissing voice. “One, I’m not your boyfriend and never was. Two, it wasn’t a lovers’ quarrel. You tried to violate me, on multiple occasions. No means no. Three, you know damn well I’m not going back to California, ever. Well, unless Soo ever wants to for some reason. Four, I don’t know how you found out where I was, but you need to leave, now before I ask the nurses if there’s a psych ward here or have them call the police. And five, I wasn’t in the hospital you brain-damaged offender. My husband was. I’m married, so you have even less than zero chance now. So go away. You’ve never been less welcome, and we need to get Kyungsoo home and in bed.”

                Taemin leaned uncomfortably close to Kyungsoo, who resisted the urge to move and just gave his best “SatanSoo” look. Tansy however, smacked the intruder right on his nose with one small hand, causing him to back away clutching it.

                “Back off toothpick!” the little girl yelled, hopping off Kyungsoo’s lap and stalking toward Taemin, only to get scooped up by Chanyeol just before the unwanted blonde managed to kick her. Tansy squirmed and shouted, “Put me down Elfie!”

                “No Tansy, I won’t. Not while there’s someone who would attack a four-year-old.”

                “That brat hit me! It needs to learn some manners!”

                “I not a brat or a it toothpick! You were gonna hurt Kunthu!”

                “Please, I didn’t even touch him. I was just trying to figure out why my boyfriend would pretend to be married to someone that fat and ugly. Must be some kind of charity thing. Fun’s over though. I’ll be taking Jongin home where he belongs now.” Taemin turned to the cowboy, who had taken Kyungsoo’s hand and was holding it tightly, while the injured man tried not to let the blonde’s words sting. He knew his husband loved him for who he was and nobody who actually cared about him thought any of the things Taemin had said were true, but they were close enough to what he’d thought he couldn’t help but doubt, just a bit, even as he was fighting against it.

                “When I said we were going home Jongin, I meant Korea, not California. Our visas will be expiring in a few months and we’re out of school and I have the money for the dance studio so there’s no reason to stay in this hole of a country any longer.”

                Baekhyun started giggling, which startled everyone considering the situation.

                “Where on earth did your cowboy find this idiot Kyungsoo? He’s even more dense than those jocks you dated in high school.” He turned to Taemin. “I don’t know who or what you think you are, but there’s a few things wrong with your Evil Plan of Evilness or whatever you want to call it, starting with Kyungsoo being my best friend since he was dumped in New York so I know what he’s capable of. There’s a reason beyond his glare for his nickname being SatanSoo. That’s his husband you’re threatening, and he’s not going to give him up. They are disgustingly in love, so my suggestion would be just to slither back under your rock or wherever you came from. Then there’s the cowboy himself. He obviously wants nothing to do with you, and he married a naturalized citizen. A few more months and he can apply to become a citizen himself if he wants, and he already had residency, no visa needed. My guess is, he’ll decide that right around the same time they buy a big house and start looking for children to adopt.”

                Tansy, still in Chanyeol’s arms started to clap. “Kunthu and Kai will be great daddies Bacon! They thould pick girls so I can play with them. Too many boys!”

                Kyungsoo forced himself to concentrate instead of getting lost in a daydream of a few dark-haired girls following Jongin around the ranch, only to come busting into a well-appointed commercial kitchen and make a mess while he tried to teach them to cook. He’d actually rather have sons as much as he liked being around Tansy, but he could understand her desire for female playmates. He wondered which his husband would prefer, or if they’d end up with both, or maybe non at all. He still didn’t know how Jongin really felt about having their own children. He almost missed Taemin trying to grab Jongin’s hand that still held Kyungsoo’s own, but that’s when he finally lashed out. Bringing up one of his legs, he landed a solid kick to the blonde’s “prized possession,” which had him curled up on the floor, clutching his crotch and swearing worse than the injured man ever had, while the other men both cringed and bit their lips to keep from laughing, while Tansy just giggled.

                Kyungsoo couldn’t help but wonder why none of the hospital staff had said or done anything about the ruckus, only to be startled at the sudden appearance of two very large redneck-looking guys with scraggly mullets and unkempt beards, slovenly attired in hospital security uniforms. He wondered at the hospital allowing such people on staff, but their presence was still welcome as they hauled Taemin to his feet.

                “This the guy causing the commotion?” one of the security guards asked, his voice more melodic and quieter than his appearance would suggest.

                “Yes Sir” Kyungsoo replied. “He invited himself along when my husband’s and my friends came to pick us up, pinched and tried to kick the little girl, insulted me, and tried to force my husband to leave with him after Jongin made it abundantly clear he didn’t want to go. In fact, he moved here to Nevada to get away from that person.”

                The security guard nodded. “The sheriff should have a lot of fun with this one, attempted assault on a child and attempted kidnapping.” He turned to his partner. “Okay Honey, get this jerk downstairs and call Steve. He’ll just love being pulled away from Lorraine’s ribs. I’ll finish up with these folks.”

                “Sure thing Lambykins” the other guard replied, easily pinning both of Taemin’s wrists with one huge hand, and that’s when Kyungsoo noticed the intricately carved band on his ring finger. A quick glace at the first security guards left hand pretty much confirmed they weren’t just having some playful banter when he saw the matching ring. They were almost certainly a couple and the idea made him smile.

                Once Taemin was dragged off, the first guard turned back to Kyungsoo, who had reclaimed Jongin’s hand.

                “Is everyone okay?”

                “We’re fine. He did pinch Tansy in the van once or twice, but that’s all. She’s pretty tough” Chanyeol replied, finally setting the little girl down. She immediately reclaimed Kyungsoo’s lap, and the injured man wrapped his unoccupied arm around her as she snuggled against his chest.

                “Now, if I could just get everyone’s names, addresses, occupations, and phone numbers for my report. I’m sure Steve, that’s the sheriff, will want to be talking to you as well. Are you folks local?”

                “Not really. Baekhyun here is from New York City, and the three of us live at Holland Ranch, while Chanyeol” Jongin, who was speaking, gestured to first Baek, then indicated himself, Kyungsoo, and Tansy, then finally stuck a thumb at Chanyeol to indicate who was whom, “lives in the town nearby. It’s a two-hour drive for most of us, and Baekhyun is visiting since my husband is his best friend.”

                “Then I’ll see about getting as much taken care of before you all go home.”

                One by one they all gave their names, Jongin translating Tansy’s lisp when the guard didn’t understand something, He chuckled when the little girl told him she played for a living, then looked surprised at the group of men having the cowboy’s bosses’ granddaughter with them.

                “I’m sorry, I thought she was yours being cared for by her uncles while her daddies were at the hospital.”

                Chanyeol grinned. “Kyungsoo is Tans’ new favorite person, so when she heard he was getting released from the hospital finally, she demanded to come along when I popped over to the ranch to borrow a van. I’ve babysat her often enough when the ranch has something major going on and need her out of the way, and she loves to follow Jongin or Kyungsoo around like a duckling so we’re all used to her.”

                “Ith true Mither. I love Kai an Kunthu an Elfie.”

                “Kai?” The guard studied Jongin’s face for a moment. “Wait a minute! You’re Korean Kai, the Bronco Buster!”

And a wild Taemin appears, just as our couple(s) (not sure about what ChanBaek will be doing yet) were getting ready to go home! Unfortunately it's not the last of him, or Suho either for that matter.