The RETURN of SUPERWOMAN SANDARA PARK

 

CHAPTER 5

Eargasm [Part 2]

 

September 2023

 

Male and Female voice-over: ANNYEONG! Welcome back to...

The 512th episode of The Return of Supermaaaaan!!!

Appa, I hear your voice!!

 

 

(A black back drop was set-up behind Jiyong)

 

PD: Tell us your predictions of being left to take care of your kids for the second time.

 

Jiyong: It’s not just my kids though.. I get an extra ticking bomb this weekend! You all know that last month was a disaster. If I’m not feeding them well, this household ends up having toys all around and every staff, not just me, would have make-up on their faces.. And now--

 

(Three different toy cars arrived and were kicked off by three pairs of chubby feet. All three went around and around Jiyong and his chair)

 

(‘SEE THIS?’ captions popped on the screen)

 

Jiyong: Kids please.. aigooo hahaha, you guys know we’re having an interview right?

 

(They kept chasing each other around and around with their high-pitched laughter)

 

Jiyong: Aaaah, they don’t hear my voice..

 

DING DONG!!

 

(All of them looked at the door)

 

Kids: MOMMMMMMMMMMY!!

 

Jiyong: It’s definitely not them though..

 

(The kids pulled Jiyong from his seat to open up the door for them)

 

(As the big doors opened, the kids cheered and jumped up and down from their places)

 

Kyeo-ul: Another babyyyyyy!!

 

Jiyong: The reinforcements that I called already arrived!

 

(A flashback scene of when Bom and Dara were organizing the kids’ bags and Jiyong with disheveled hair staring at the actual kids in the living room was shown. Later on, he picked up his phone and called someone to please come over and help him)

 

Jiyong: Yaah, I knew you were in Jeju as well..

 

Youngbae: G-Dra-goWwwn..

 

Female voice-over: OMO! Its Taeyang!!

 

Male voice-over: They’re bestfriends right?

 

(A montage of Taeyang and his honey voice during his solo hits as well as solo parts in Big Bang songs was shown)

 

Jiyong: --is Hyo Rin okay that you two would be here?

 

Kyeo-ul and Sani: BABY HYE-YOUNG!!

 

Youngbae: Nehh.. she said you might go bald earlier, sooo..

 

Kyeo-ul and Sani: BABY HYE-YOUNG!!

 

(A focus shot of Youngbae carrying Hye-young with their chinky eye smiles)

 

Youngbae: Annyeoung unnies!! *as he made his baby’s hand wave at them*

 

Jiyong: Sera chingu!

 

(‘Friends of the same age’ caption showed up when Sera and Hye Young were already sitting together on the floor)

 

Sera: Bbaaaapapapopo gibipopapapiii !

 

Hye-young: … … …

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(Back with the black backdrop, G-Dragon and Taeyang were interviewed)

 

Jiyong: Deh, Sera is just 1 month older than Hye Young.. they’re chingus

                And Kyeo-ul is 2 months older than Sani.. 

 

Youngbae: You’re with 3 kids for the weekend huh? How are you so far?

 

Jiyong: I’m fine, I’m fine.. Did you know that Dara enjoyed seeing my reaction towards this ‘simple’ task? Did you?!

 

Youngbae: Noona playing pranks on you is a given..

 

Jiyong: The kids’ bags must be heavy with things that they don’t really need when we go out later!

 

Youngbae: HAHAHHA, it’s a given as well.. Bom-noona did it too?

 

Jiyong: *realization just sank in*

 

(sad and pitiful music played)

 

Jiyong: Anyway.. what do you think of our episodes so far?

 

Youngbae: For the past month?

 

Jiyong: Yeah..

 

Youngbae: You videocall Dara-noona too much.

 

Jiyong: Yah! Don’t believe Seungri!

 

Youngbae: HAHAHHA, *chinky eye smile* It was televised bro..

 

Jiyong: Whatever.. apart from that?

 

Youngbae: Dads all over the world now knows how to create Daljiyong..

 

Jiyong: Our family will get a patent for that one!

 

Youngbae: Dads all over the world now dries up their kids’ whole body using a blower..

 

Jiyong: Can we patent that one as well?

 

Youngbae: Are you going to call Dara-noona to ask?

 

Jiyong: YAH!

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(At the clinic, 4 kids towed by Jiyong and Youngbae were welcomed by ladies in pink, yellow or blue scrubs with cartoon or animal prints. Kyeo-ul, Sani, Sera and Hye Young have their own little 99%is customized bags on their backs according to their preferred color. Jiyong and Youngbae also carried bags that could be for an entire week of camping.)

 

Dra. Yoo: Welcome! How was your trip before coming here?

 

(The kids gave her their signature cute-playful-adorable-angel smiles while the Dads stared wide-eyed with tight-lipped smiles)

 

Kyeou-ul: Sooooooo fuuuun!!

 

(A scene from the Kwon Jeju house was played 2 times faster than normal: Jiyong and Youngbae chasing the kids around the house to make them wear a single piece of garment for each lap. Before they complete an ensemble for one kid, another one would be able to remove something from her body.)

 

Sani: Sooooooo fuuuun!!

 

(A scene from the mini SUV was played 2 times faster than normal: Jiyong and Youngbae chasing the kids inside the vehicle to properly strap them in their respective seats. Before they even strap one down, another one goes out of the SUV and runs away.)

 

Dra. Yoo: Did you bring the necessary documents for the psychological tests?

 

Jiyong: That! And a lot of other things that we don’t really need..

 

Youngbae: Why complain? We already removed some of them before we left..

 

(A scene from the Kwon Jeju house was played 2 times faster than normal: Jiyong and Youngbae were removing things from the bulky bags prepared by Bom and Dara. Sera’s toy xylophone, Sani’s fairytale books, Kyeo-ul’s monstrous Poong-poong doll, Sera’s outfits for 1 week, Sani’s toys for cooking, Kyeo-ul’s large medicine kit.. )

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JIYONG AND SANI’s Regular Interaction

 

Dra. Yoo: Please relax and play with Sani, you can use the toys around..

 

(A colorful room in a Child Psychology Center where Jiyong and Sani are, was featured. In another room, the experts and doctors observes them through a CCTV monitor)

 

Sani: There’s so many toys here!

 

Jiyong: Should we play something?

 

Sani: I should play with bessy Kyeo-ul.. where is she?

 

Jiyong: But Daddy wants to play with you too..

 

Dra. Yoo: (commentary from another room) She already knows the concept of playing with children in her age.

 

Sani: Okaaay.. woah keguri!

 

Jiyong: In English?

 

Sani: Frog!

 

Jiyong: In Tagalog?

 

Sani: *thinks* kokak.. ?

 

Jiyong: Are you sure?

 

Sani: Pala.. aa.. hmm.. palaka?

 

Jiyong: Ding-dong-ding!

 

(Sani rejoiced with the musical sound his dad used to indicate a correct answer.)

 

Sani: A chicken!

 

Jiyong: Kuruchi, you ate that one yesterday right?

 

(Sani stared at her dad with baffled eyes but Jiyong already averted to taking more toys from the shelf)

 

Dra. Yoo: (commentary from another room) Aigoooo.. *sigh*

 

(Jiyong and Sani continued naming toy animals in 3 different languages. Sani even categorized the toys according to different animal groups: insects, mammals, reptiles and so on.. )

 

Dra. Yoo: (commentary from another room) Woah, how can a 43-month old do this? She even knows words like ‘egg-bearing’ and can even translate it to 2 other languages..

 

(Jiyong showed Sani some flashcards. And Sani didn’t just name the main item on the drawing. She described it using colors and adjectives. In entire sentences.)

 

Dra. Yoo: (commentary from another room) Woah, daebak!

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JIYONG AND SERA’s Regular Interaction

 

Dra. Yoo: Please relax and play with Sera.. Sani will be with Kyeo-ul at the playground..

 

(A colorful room in a Child Psychology Center where Jiyong and Sera are, was featured. In another room, the experts and doctors observes them through a CCTV monitor)

 

Sera: Waaaaw! *clap clap clap*

 

Jiyong: Hahaha-hmmm, you like this room that much?

 

Sera: Babaaap!

 

Jiyong: Kuruchi, there’s kitchen toys here as well..

 

Sera: Bbgaaaah.. papapobuing buing dadadap.<