Chapter Eleven

Cloaked Heart

Soobin patiently waited for Yeonjun to continue as the older anxiously averted his gaze and instead opted to sit down on the bench. Soobin sat down next to him—his eyes never leaving Yeonjun. "Hyung, what is it?"

Yeonjun exasperatedly groaned, running a hand through his hair before turning to stare at Soobin with a look of confliction. "Huening Kai...he has..feelings for you."

The dark-haired boy's eyes slowly widened, confusion etched on his features as he blinked at the older—unsure of what to say. For a long time, Soobin had thought that Huening Kai had hated him and wanted nothing to with him. To find out that the younger had feelings for him made Soobin question everything that had happened between them. Why had he treated Soobin like this? Why did Taehyun turn against him as well? 

"How do you know?" Soobin faintly asked, after a few moments of silence.

Yeonjun nibbled on his bottom lip, guiltily casting his gaze to the floor. "We got into a fight and I couldn't control my-"

"A fight? What the hell happened hyung?" Soobin worriedly asked, instantly sitting up. He wished he had never ran out. After all, he was the reason everything was going wrong. He was the reason s were fighting.

"He made me angry and I just ing snapped," Yeonjun gritted, clenching his hands into fists as he rocked back and forth on the bench. His mind racing back to the exact moment his hands tightly gripped onto Huening Kai's shirt. The younger sputtering and choking. He hadn't meant to lay his hands on him but Huening Kai had provoked him.

Soobin raised an eyebrow at Yeonjun questioningly. "What do you mean you..snapped?"

"I could have killed him if Beomgyu and Taehyun didn't pull me off," Yeonjun whispered, squeezing his eyes shut.

Soobin was silent as his eyes travelled up to the night starry sky. The golden stars flickering in the pitch black sky. He didn't know how to feel, what to do or what to say. Everything was a mess and he didn't know where to start to fix it. Yeonjun had hurt their maknae because of him. Because of stupid Soobin. Stupid. Stupid. He always ruined things. Why couldn't he have just buried his feelings inside of him? He regretted telling Yeonjun or Beomgyu how he felt. If only he could have foreseen the future, he would have done everything in his power to stop this drift between s. It was affecting their relationship, their performances and their whole group dynamic.

Slowly, fans would start noticing how they were all starting to become distant with each other. Their managers and staff would notice. He had to do something. Something to make this better. Whatever this was.

"We need to stop doing this," Soobin piped up, fighting back tears.

Yeonjun looked at Soobin, sadness clouding his features. Immediately realizing what the younger was talking about. "Soobin-"

"Hyung this isn't right anymore. Don't you see? This thing that we have is ing up the group," Soobin choked, his emotions getting harder to control as tears started rolling down his cheeks. He brought his hands up to his face as he wiped them away whilst avoiding Yeonjun's gaze.

"Soobin, I love you and that isn't gonna change," Yeonjun cried, holding himself from touching Soobin knowing that he would only pull away.

Soobin snorted. "Maybe you should stop loving me. I'm not good for you."

Yeonjun was quiet as his face darkened, anger clouding his vision. "You know, every time that we get somewhere you always run away. Run away from the truth."

"This time there's nothing to run away from," Soobin blankly said, standing up from the bench. The soft breeze blowing strands of his hair out of place.

"What about Huening Kai, huh?" Yeonjun grunted, also standing up to stand in front of Soobin.

Soobin nonchalantly shrugged. "What about him?"

Yeonjun hesitated, his gaze shifting to the park around them. "What are you gonna tell him?"

"I don't feel the same way about him," Soobin truthfully said. 

They stayed in silence, watching the world around them. Yeonjun stared at Soobin, his eyes full of desperation. "Please don't do this Soobin. I love you."

Their eyes locked as Soobin bit his lip. "I don't love you."

Yeonjun tearily chuckled, shaking his head. "You don't mean that."

Soobin knew that he had no choice but to do this. To fix things he had to do this. He had to sacrifice the way he felt about Yeonjun. He had to focus on what he trained years for. To debut and he wasn't going to let anything get in the way. Not even Yeonjun.

"I'm sorry hyung but I don't love you. We should just end this," Soobin bitterly said, breaking eye contact with Yeonjun. 

Yeonjun reached over to grab Soobin's hand but the younger had already started walking off. 

Little did he know how much Soobin's heart was breaking every step. As soon as he was out of sight from Yeonjun, he burst into tears. Recklessly sobbing as he covered his mouth whilst slowly making his way back to their dorm. Their manager was gonna be pissed with him and everyone but that was the least of his worries.

He had messed up big time with Yeonjun and he knew there was no going back. 

 

Panting, Beomgyu halted—bending over to catch his breath. His mind constantly repeating what Taehyun had said to him. To be truthful, he didn't know how he felt about the younger. He was too focused on finding Soobin to even care. He just wanted to know their leader was safe.

Despite it being pitch black, Beomgyu could make out a figure walking towards his direction. It looked exactly like...Soobin.

"Soobin hyung!" Beomgyu shouted, rushing over to the older.

He realized something wasn't right when he noticed Soobin was crying.

"Hyung, what happened?" Beomgyu asked, slowly walking over to Soobin but was stopped by the older.

"Pleas-please Beomgyu jus-just leav-leave it," Soobin stuttered, tears running down his cheeks.

"Soobin, if it's Yeonjun hyung we can fix it. You guys just need to-"

"No! No! No! We're done. Everything is done! There's no need to talk anymore. I don't..I don't feel the same way about him anymore," Soobin snapped, causing Beomgyu to flinch in shock at the older's harsh tone.

"Hyung, you don't mean that. You're not thinking straight," Beomgyu tried to convince Soobin but only infuriated the dark-haired boy even more.

"I am thinking straight," Soobin paused, locking eyes with Beomgyu who looked at him with sympathy. "I'm doing what's best for the group. For the fans."

Beomgyu tiredly sighed, giving up. He knew he couldn't do anything to change Soobin's mind anymore. "You need to know something about-"

"Huening Kai," Soobin finished, his eyes nervously shifting to the pavement. "I know."

Beomgyu didn't know what else to say, his mind blank. "I.."

"I'm going back to the dorm. Tell everyone that manager hyung is gonna be worried," Soobin said before walking past Beomgyu and continuing down the road—his hands buried in his pockets.

Beomgyu slightly turned around, watching the older walk away. He needed to do something. Anything. Anything to fix this mess.

 

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