I turned over in my bed as my phone vibrated on my night stand. Not even attempting to poke my head out of the covers to be rudely greeted by the sunshine that invaded through the windows, I grabbed my phone and swiped left quickly.

“I do this everyday and I still hate this.part.”

I closed my eyes and sat up in bed angrily. My roommates were already awake as someone was pouring cereal, and another was in the bathroom. I turned towards Zelo who was laying on bed on his scrolling through his phone.

“How long has he been in the bathroom?” I asked nodding towards the bathroom.

“20 minutes, you know how he is in the mornings.” I let out a sigh of relief as I rubbed my forehead. ”You aren’t going to go bang on the door?” I looked up surprised at his question. I had know these guys for, years and figured that by now they knew I was the least assertive out of all of us, by now.

“Why would I bang on the door?”

“I don’t know, I just figured you had turned a new leaf of something like yesterday.”

“How was I yesterday?” I tried to hide the annoyance in my voice.

“I don’t know you just seemed different. Himchan usually pushes you off his spot on the couch, for dinner, but you stood up to him and did a stand up job in putting him in his place.”

“I guess?” I just remember being really tired yesterday and that my patience had just about disappeared when Himchan decided to joke around when I simply wasn’t in the mood.“...then there was what you told that girl you like so much and-”

“What are you talking about?”

“You called her yesterday...The girl you like so much, and confessed to her. It was like someone had grabbed you by the shoulders, slapped you in the face, and yelled ‘Grow a pair!’”

“Zelo!” Yongguk walked in pulling his T-shirt on as he scolded the youngest.  

“Sorry, Hyung, but it's’ not like I’m lying.” Zelo responded quietly.

“I didn’t say you lied, but you could have said it more respectfully.”

“What are you talking about?” I looked between the both of them confused again.

“Do you not remember?” He questioned as he sat sat down holding his shoes. “You came back from your study session like a cat who had just caught a mouse yesterday, and then you called that Naomi girl and told her how you felt...” Yongguk put one of his shoes on and brushed a scuff mark off of the side. “... do you honestly not remember?”

“I thought I dreamed that!” I stood up and grabbed my phone to look at my history, and there it was, a 15 minute call with Naomi, I even looked at my messages to see if what all I thought had happened in a dream, actually happened. And didn’t feel to good.

“What’s wrong with him?” Jongup walked in holding a bowl of cereal in one hand and holding the box and carton milk underneath his arm.

“I don’t feel so good.” I sat down on my bed and felt my face.

“Dude you’re turning super red.” Jongup chimed in.

“What happened to the Young Jae we saw yesterday?”

“I don’t know about that Young Jae, but how I’m feeling right now...I might not see tomorrow.” I grabbed my phone and looked at it again and exhaled deeply, as a searched my drawer for my inhaler.

“What did you do different yesterday?” Yongguk questioned as he pulled on his leather jacket, to leave.

“Nothing? I woke up, took all my meds...”

“Prescribed?” Zelo said jokingly.

“Yes, then I did the dishes, we went to that new chinese restaurant, I went to office hours, with my professor, went to class, and didn’t sit next to anyone sick...”

“What happened to make you so...fearless yesterday?” Dae-Hyun questioned. I almost forgot he was there as he emerged from underneath his blanket, only to show his face.

“Nothing, I just...fearless?...fearless...” That’s when it hit me and I got up from bed and moved to the hamper, for my dirty pants from yesterday.  

“What’s he doing?”

“I’m looking for the paper from yesterday?”

“What paper?”

“From that chinese restaurant.” The pockets were both empty so I looked around the room and locked my eyes on the trash can beside my bed, and started to pull out the papers.

“You can’t be serious Young Jae.”

I unfolded the crumpled up paper and read it aloud “Just listen to this.”

I brushed a piece of hair out of my face and held it with both hands as I read it. “When alone with love, choose and ride the fearless path.” As I looked at their faces I could see that some of their looks were o funderstanding, while others...not so much.

“You can’t be serious? Those things are printed by the millions, by a machine in someone's basement in NY or something.”

“I’m not saying that this caused it but I do think it’s coincidentally interesting.”

“Good, because if you start believing in that stuff, there’s honestly no hope for the rest of us.”

In my mind I knew that it was just a really good and convenient explanation and I wanted to stick with it. I wanted to test it more just to be sure of my hunches. “I’m the smartest out of all you guys so I can’t leave you guys without an idol to aspire towards.” Yongguk pushed you aside, Himchan threw a towel at you while Zelo was laughing too-dramatically on his bed. “Hey the proofs in the transcripts.”

“Prove this. You’re going to be late for your class.” Said Jongup as he slid into the bathroom and locked the door.

“Yah! Open up, I was next! You don’t even have classes today!”