03. Feelings

Everything seems so distant now. What I could only hold is a picture of us, and the memories with it. At that moment, I found myself staring at my hand—the one she held from last night. I smiled unknowingly as I recall how soft her hand was and how I missed holding it.

Foolish, I am. I could be happy with these simple thoughts and fight back every reason to cry. Maybe that's just how everything should be. None of these would happen if it wasn't meant, right? 

~

A sound of breaking glass echoed on the walls of the house. It startled everyone including me, even when I was the one who broke it. Jennie and I were trying to cook a meal for our movie marathon when I accidentally lose hold of the bowl.

"What was that?" Chaeyoung asked as soon as she stepped on the kitchen. Jisoo followed behind, shocked. They looked at the broken bowl on floor then at me with worried faces. 

"Sorry. It slipped," I said as I try to clean up the mess but Jennie stopped me from handling anything. 

"Don't touch it," she scolded me and took my hands in hers just to keep me away from  it. My eyes were immediately locked on our hands as she pulled me up to stand. I literally felt myself controlling my breathing at that whole moment.

"I'll clean this. You continue with what you're cooking," Jisoo volunteered, grabbing the broom. Jennie pulled me away, leaving Jisoo and Chaeng with the mess while we continue cooking. Until now, I'm still mesmerized by her soft hand that when she let go, I can't stop looking at it even when we're busy cooking.

What is happening to me?

Even after everything that night, my mind is still filled with the thoughts of holding her again. I've held her before but what I felt then was nothing compared to what I'm feeling now. Somehow, something inside me was stronger now than it was ever.

The night is getting deeper, and we're all ready for bed but I'm still not sleepy yet. While they get themselves comfortable on the sheets, I am still sitting up, watching them silently. Jisoo was at the other end of the mattress while I'm on the opposite, making Jennie and Chaeyoung occupy the space between. Jennie is be