'Sica...'

There's quite a long gap after calling her name when I couldn't reach her. I talked to the voicemail that might be laughing at me as I failed so many attempts as I quitted after calling her name. I felt quite dizzy. I felt terrible, sitting inside the taxi headed me home after what happened there, at Krystal's apartment. I took a deep breath and looked at my phone again. That time, I reassured myself that I had to move on from that, even though I didn't even know-how.

'Sica... I'm sorry I can not wait for you. I just remember, I need to do something that Mr. Hwang told me to do... Let me know when you're home. Okay?'

Beep.

I ended the voice message. A bit relieved. I didn't know what to do. Should I tell her? Should I not? Plus, that time when Krystal told me that she meant it. I was so frustated to remember it all, but also I couldn't run to Jessica right now. I couldn't lie to her. I just can't.

I plugged the earphones and listened to music to calm myself down. I needed it. Without I even realized, tears fell to my cheeks. Not a single time I ever imagined of the thing that just happened to me. Why me. I tried to erase but it kept on punching me that I felt even worse. I decided to text Jonghyun cause he was the closest one and I felt like I really had to spill it out. I hope that'd make me feel better.

All the way the trip back home, I looked at the window with such an empty sight. It was when the taxi passed an empty road, I saw a girl from distant, over the bridge. I wasn't sure that I didn't see it clearly but as the car approaching near to it, I could see clearly that it was Tiffany... It was Stephanie Hwang.

I turned my sight back when the car passed under the bridge and it was a terrible scenery that I saw her trying to climb up the edge of the bridge. Spontaneously, I demanded the taxi driver to stop the car and quickly ran to the bridge. I had no idea what she was doing but I was sure she was up to something bad. Something that really bad.

I ran with all of my strength to reach her.
"TIFFANY!!!"

I screamed my lung out but she didn't budge. Instead, she could finally climb up the edge, then she sat there.
"TIFFANY!" I was almost there.

She finally looked at me. I was out of my breath.
"Yahhh... Tiffany. What are you do..."

I haven't finished when I saw her crying silently. She looked at me differently this time. Before, the sight was so cold, like she could feel the hateful in Tiffany's eyes but this time, she looked helpless. That time, I knew, she really was up to something terrible. She wanted to take a suicide.


"You should go now..."
"What are you doing?" I confused. I clearly didn't know how to do it.
"It's so tiring... It hurts a lot. I feel so alone. I just want to end it."
"What happened?"
"It's none of your business. So you better go."

She stared deeply into the road while trying to ignore me. I moved closer now.

"Was it really hurt?"
"It is..." Still, she didn't look at me.
"I'm sorry..."
"Why would you? Because I have a pathetic life?"
"I'm sorry that you have to feel alone." I tried the hardest to speak. "Honestly I had no idea what to talk to you, but if you really want to do it right now, I also should feel terribly sorry that I didn't treat you good too. I'm sorry, Tiffany..."
"Everyone always ignores me... You don't have to say sorry."

I stared at her.
I could feel fear and bitterness in her trembling voice.
It was a brave move but I decided to reach her arm.
She was a bit shocked by that and starred back at me.

"Your body is cold. So cold." I started. "But it wasn't as cold as your heart right now. I have no idea what you're dealing with or that I don't want to pretend that I know how you feel. Heck, I don't know anything about you. But please... You know you don't want this, Tiffany. Come... Down here... You're hurt and scared, and that's okay."
"Why do you even care?" A tear fell down.
"Maybe I should not. But maybe there's a reason I saw you down there from the taxi that supposedly brought me home already."

I held her hand a bit stronger. I felt so scared.
"Tiffany..."

She still didn't budge me.
"Tiffany..." I smiled a little when she looked at me weakly. "It was a rough night for me, tonight. But if the universe,