Tuesday, two thirty p.m., I pedalled my mountain-bike to the dance class. Hani rode along with me as we meet on our way to the class, and we were the last to arrive. After securing my bike, we get into the building. Seulgi who was talking with Namjoo spotted us and ushered me to the same room I had the audition and Hani had to follow Namjoo.

My gaze swept over the whole building in search of Wheein. As I climbed up the stairs, I found her. She stood on the far end with a small group of girls along the hallway on the second floor. I started toward her, but when one of the girls headed away, I glimpsed Hyejin there and decided to miss out on their doubtlessly entertaining conversation.

It didn’t take long until Wheein spotted me and excused herself from the group.

Hyejin grabbed her arms, saying something to her, Wheein answering her by pointing her head in my direction. She glanced at me and I glared back, feeling an overwhelming need to flip her off. But I was grown-up enough to resist. Thankfully, I couldn’t hear what she said to Wheein; I was so not interested. She moved her hand from her arm and walked into the room with other girls.

Wheein jogged over. “Hi, Unnie. Are those shades new? And why are you wearing it inside the building?”

Yeah, good feeling that she knew my entire collection of clothes and accessories.

Meant she paid attention. I grinned.

“Nope, they’re mine,” Byul, without her cap and mask, said behind me. When she came around to face me and carefully slid the sunglasses off my nose, I couldn’t stop my smirk from spreading into a real smile.

“She gave them to me after the party,” I told Wheein, who suddenly looked a bit puzzled.

“Hangover and sunlight, not a good combination.”

Both of them laughed at that, and I had a hard time deciding which sound pleased me more.

“Unnie, ready for your first lesson?” Wheein’s eyes skated over to me. A wink said I was in going to be in her class.

“Yeap, let’s go to the top floor.”

“Top floor?” she asked me in confused.

“Oh, Seulgi didn’t tell you? She’s not going to be in your class, she going to the…” Byul said to her then laid her arm over my shoulders. “…top floor.”

Stunned, I stopped, and I swore Wheein stared at Byul with the same look of amazement as I did.

Byul ignored her. “Dance with me?” she whispered close to my ear, enough for both of us to hear it.

Man, I lost my voice. Byul knew how miserably I dance, I can’t even called myself an amateur. Still, she wanted me to be in her class rather than other students who I heard from Hani was already on a professional level. It could makes her job less hard but she choose to me, the impossible one.

Wheein awaited my answer with a comical grin. Since she didn’t seem annoyed at all, I thought I could as well accept. “Ye…ahh.” And yeah, if that hadn’t come out so much like a question, I wouldn’t have sounded like a total idiot, too.

“Cool. See you after class, unnie.” Wheein jogged ahead into the room, same room Hyejin that went in. Wait, so she’s in Wheein’s class? Crap.

“Alright, to the top floor you go!” she smacked me on the back and walked away leaving me behind.

What the hell? That’s hurt . Rubbing my back, as I followed her to the top floor. Gritting my teeth. Oh I wished I could straggled her right here, right now.

As I opened the door I realised that the room are empty, “Where is everybody?”

I took a few steps forward when suddenly the door closed behind me. The shock startled a yelp out of me, when I turned around I saw Byul was leaning against the wall with arms across her chest. Not paying attention to the confuse me, she walked passed me and started doing some stretching. When she noticed that wasn’t moving and won’t be anytime soon, “Eight minutes. I suggest you start now or you will get a cramp later.”

Shaking my head, “Whatever,” and started mirroring her moves. I’m getting good at it by now. I’ve been watching solarsido on youtube lately. Last time she was showing this few moves of stretching. So I’m used to it. What can I say, I’m a fast learner.

I’m not going to lie, eight minutes of stretching was never this fun in my life as we keep smiling and smirking at each other, and giggled even. But when the times up, I had never feel so helplessly unhappy.

The music on, bobbing her head forwards and backwards, she’s smiling, I’m frowned and smiled back. Then she started pulling an imaginary string to get over to me, I just have to roll my eyes. For someone so cool, I got to admit that she’s cool, she has some very cheesy dance moves. Then she made her arms into robot arms, bending them at the elbow and moving her hands up and down. She leapt and twirled behind me, grabbing my arms and start moving it like a robot.  

It’s was so funny and strange that I was laughing. She started laughing too.

We were having fun.

Fun. Never in my life have I had ever found dancing was fun. I mean I’ve watched Wheein dancing countless times, she’s good, full of passion and charisma but that just it. I never thought it would be fun for me to dance too. But with Byul, it’s different. She made it so much fun to dance.

“So, what your favourite type of song?” she asked as she did a really cool body wave that I’ve been trying so hard to do for the past three days.   

I copied her body wave “Hip-hop” earning a chuckled from her.

She did a jolting chest pop “Hip hop you say…” to demonstrate. To finish her moves she did a few shuffle-slide steps while pushing her arms down to the floor. When she looked up, she was grinning.

I got down and did the same pose, well almost the same, which I’m guessing it was awkward and funny. Judging from her face, she was trying hard not to laugh. But when I snorted, we both got down on the floor laughing so hard. 

“See, dancing wasn’t so hard isn’t it?”

“Yeah” I had to agree.

We both got up but the pain on my left ankle brought me back to the ground, “Ouch!”

Byul quickly kneed down beside me, “Are you okay?”

“I’m fine.” As I staggered to my feet, however I quickly collapsed, “I guess I’m not fine after all” I grimaced and clutched my ankle, “Damn I hope it’s not broken”

“Let me have a look” Byul urged.

She pried my hands away gently and she quickly unlaced and removed my sneakers. When she began to massage and manipulate my ankle, I cried a little from the pain, miraculously the pain started to ease away. “Well, the good news is, it’s not broken…”

“The bad news is?” I asked.

“It just a sprained. You will be good once you put on some ice over.”

As I let her massaged my ankle the thought of Wheein already waiting for me downstairs came into my mind. Gently I pried her hand away, leaving a frowned on her face “I’m think I’m okay now.” putting on my sneaker I got up and tried my best to endures the pain as I walked to the door, “Thanks” I said before I closed the door.

I was right, Wheein was already at the lobby waiting for me. “I guess you are having fun today”

Trying hard not to show the pain on my face I gave her a smile.

“How’s yours?” I asked back.

“Nothing special”

I bit my lip. “Really? Even with Hyejin around?”

She just sighed at me. “Unnie, it’s a group practice, it’s not like we are doing a personal training”

Feeling slightly guilty as I was enjoying my personal training with Byul too much earlier. From her tone I had a feeling she didn’t know that I was Byul’s only student. “Are you going to hang here much longer? Because I really need to go home.” And then I was still grounded, of course.

The pause she took to scan a few students who still around made me wonder if she was looking out for her. The flames of anger and jealousy up my spine. But Hyejin seemed to have gone already. Well, good then.

“Let’s go,” she said.

On the way to our bikes, we crossed Byul’s path. She cut a brief glance to my ankle. “See you tomorrow.”

“What does she mean? There’s no practice tomorrow.” Wheein pointed out as we walked on.

Okay, I figured it was time to spill. “Byul is doing some personal training with me.”

Wheein could have said many things then, like asking me why, or where, or even when it happened I was insane enough to agree to that. But she chose to say the most stupid thing of all.

“With you?”

“Gee, thanks.”

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to sound like an . But…are we seriously talking about Byul unnie?”

She snorted, and I should have kicked her in the for it. “What’s your problem with that?”

“No problem.” She mounted her bike, waiting for me to get the number combination of my lock right. “Just thought you were grounded.”

“I am.”

“And you get out of the house for the practice how?”

Now I avoided her gaze, stand-kicking into the pedals to get ahead of her. “Same way you get in.”

She had no trouble catching up with me. “You’re sneaking out? For Byul unnie?” If Wheein was implying that I never did it for her, she let that leak from every syllable.

“So what?”

Wheein cast me a sideways glance, her lips tight in a weak attempt at hiding a grin. “Here I’m gone for just a few weeks, and you turn into quite the kinder surprise.”

Hell, yeah. And I couldn’t even stand those goddamn chocolate eggs.

“So, now that you’re acquainted with the exclusive way in and out of your room, want to come to cafe for a drink with the others?”

“I’m not doing this during the day, Wheein. My mom isn’t that ignorant. Byul picks me up at five in the morning.” I whined. “She makes me run at the beach.”

“Ah, fun guaranteed.”

“I swear that woman is Satan in the flesh.”

We reached my house, and while I got off my bike, Wheein placed one foot to the pavement and studied me with those intense brown eyes. “You know I still don’t get it. Why are you torturing yourself for something you loathed all your life?”

“I never loathed dancing.”

“You said it was the fifth, never mentioned plague that would bring the world down.”

Did I really say that? Wow, this midget was good.

As I wheeled my bike into the shed, Wheein’s raised voice drifted to me. “Is Byul unnie the reason?”

I froze, staring at my dad’s fishing rods for an infinite moment. A piss-glare on my face, I finally walked outside, slowly, then leaned against the doorframe with my arms folded over my chest. “What in the world makes you think that?”

Wheein had propped her forearms on the handle bar of her bike, leaning forward in a casual way. “Well, you two are pretty close lately.”

Okay, I am twenty-two, had never been kissed, and I had all I was going to take from my best friend. “Are you really that ignorant? I’m not doing this for Byul.”

“Then why?”

God forgive me, I was going to slap her in a moment. “I’m doing this because of you!”

My heart stopped the moment I understood my slip.

Wheein’s mouth hung open as she stared at me. She gripped the metal of the handle bar, closing her fingers so hard the white showed around the knuckles. Not quite the reaction I had prayed for the past five or so years.

Her gaze dropped, her eyes trained to the ground in front of her. That was an eerie moment. Heck, I didn’t think something could shock Wheein so much. Anything. Especially me.

Okay, the hope that she would be all smiles and kiss me for my close declaration of love had slipped with her look, but her stunned silence made me feel very uncomfortable. I wished I was a snowman and could melt right now.

“Come here, unnie,” she finally said.

No. I waited a couple of seconds, struggling to get rid of the panic setting in. When I didn’t obey, she stepped off her bike and came toward me, the slowness only adding to my anxiety.

“Look…”

I shook my head, begging her to stop. “Please don’t give me that of you’re like my big sister now.”

“Unnie...I…”

Oh my God, this was going downhill, and there was nothing to stop the avalanche I had kicked loose. My knees shook all of a sudden, my mouth went dry.

Wheein reached out but stopped before she would touch my cheek. Her lips pressed together, she withdrew her hand. “I’m dating Hyejin.”

What? No. Not that girl. Not any girl! No!

In deliberate movements, I backed off then walked into the house, not saying a word.

With the screaming pain inside my soul, I quietly closed the door. It was all I could do not to break out in tears in front of Wheein.

I couldn’t breathe. My stomach knotted, making me sick. As the first tears started to fall, I flew into my bathroom and dry-heaved into the toilet.

Wheein shouldn’t see me like this, ever. I wished I could say she understood and that’s why she didn’t follow me. But with everything that happened, she probably didn’t want to face me after I’d declared my feelings for her.

It took hours until I could breathe again without my throat constricting and aching. I sat on my bed, flipping through the many photo books I had made of us over the years. Each time I turned a page, I wanted to rage and cry again about the loss that ripped my insides apart. But I had shed all the tears I was capable of. I felt completely empty. Hollow. Alone.

When Mom called me to dinner and I told her I wasn’t hungry, she tried to make me talk in her understanding way. I had a hard time convincing her that I just wanted to be left alone.

In the end she let me be, and I locked myself into my room. Into my personal realm of misery.

As the sun set and I slumped on my bed with some heavy rave music on the iPod, I faced another problem.

I wasn’t going to dance anymore. Ever. And I needed to cancel on Byul’s training the next day.

I called Seulgi and got her cell phone number, but I wasn’t in the mood to talk to anyone, so I sent her a text message.

DON’T NEED TO TRAIN TOMORROW. AND I WANT OFF THE CLASS. But then, as far as I knew, she never saved my numbers, so I added YONGSUN in brackets.

It didn’t take long for my message to be answered. DOES IT HURT SO MUCH?

What kind of question was that? The pain eating my insides killed me. I slammed the phone on the nightstand and dropped onto my pillow with a snort. Seconds later, I realized she actually had no idea what happened. She must mean something else. Of course, my ankle. Palm pressing to my brow, I breathed deep.

Then I texted her again. NO, ANKLE IS FINE. I’M JUST DONE WITH DANCING.

THANKS FOR YOUR HELP. BYE.

I expected her to accept that and leave me alone. She did…for fifteen minutes. Then the next message came in. OKAY. TALKED TO WHEEIN. SO THE CAT’S OUT?

The cat’s out? Seriously? What the hell, Byul knew about them dating and she didn’t tell me. But then, what reason would she have had? We weren’t really friends, and she didn’t know about my love for Wheein.

Or maybe she did. Everyone knew it. I felt so terribly exposed right then. The entire neighbourhood knew about my obsession with this girl, while she dated this lion girl. The urge to cry again persisted, but no tears fell. So I turned up the volume of the music and tried to blast my brains into oblivion with it.

The phone vibrated on the mattress next to me. New message from Byul. CAN YOU SLIP OUT AFTER DARK?

WHY WOULD I DO THAT?

DISTRACTION. And this time she added a winking smiley face.

I wasn’t in the mood to be distracted. Not in any mood at all, actually. I only wanted to wallow in self-pity. REALLY, I’M NOT UP TO MORE TORTURE.

God, if only the world could leave me alone for the next few hours. But no such luck. As soon as darkness fell, a low voice carried up to my room. “Get down here, Yongsun-shi!”

I choked on the piece of chocolate I’d just shoved into my mouth. I rubbed my tears sticky eyes and rushed to the window. “Why did you come? Can’t you read? I said no.”

“You said no torturing you. I’m not going to. Now get into some nice clothes, wash your face, and come out.”

“I’m not in the mood…”

She jumped and climbed onto the roof of our shed then stalked toward my window with this evil grin on her lips.