Chapter 15

 

SUMI: Good morning!

SUMI: Yoongi~

SUMI: Oppa? Are you napping?

SUMI: Oppa?

YOONGI: You haven’t called me Oppa for a long time.

SUMI: Why did it take you so long to reply?!

YOONGI: I was working :)

SUMI: Ahh I see…

YOONGI: What’s up?

SUMI: I was wondering if you’d like to go out today…

YOONGI: Why…?

SUMI: Because you’re my boyfriend and I want to see you…

SUMI: Yoongi?

YOONGI: Where do you want to go?

SUMI: Our favourite park? Or just to get ice cream :3

YOONGI: Ice cream sounds good.

SUMI: See you at the ice cream shop near the school?

YOONGI: What time?

SUMI: Right now :D

YOONGI: Are you there already?

SUMI: Maybe… are you coming or not?

SUMI: Yoongi…

YOONGI: I’m on my way right now.

 

Sumi grins as she slides her phone into her pocket. She turns around in her favourite seat in front of the ice cream shop and peers down the road, hoping to see Yoongi walking towards her already. But, of course, Yoongi will be at least 10 minutes. She misses Yoongi more than anything in the world. They haven’t spoken or seen each other since graduation day, and it has been almost a month since that day.

No messages, no calls, and no indication that Yoongi still exists for an entire month. Sumi has been busy of course. Her publisher contacts her every day about the book reviews and how the cover art is coming along. He has contacted 3 artists for Sumi to choose from when they are done.

But each day Sumi hoped that the call was from Yoongi. Each time her face would light up and check the phone, only to see her publisher’s name flashing on the screen.

This morning, she decided she was going to make the first move. Why bother waiting if he isn’t going to call her?

The thought of Yoongi not wanting to see her pains her more than she can bear. She loves him with all her heart, and she wants to make it work. The thought of him with anyone else makes her sick to her stomach. She can’t lose him.

 

After pondering him for a while, Sumi feels a gentle hand on her shoulder. She looks up, beaming happily. Yoongi is standing behind her, two ice creams in his hand. He looks tired with heavy bags forming under his eyes. His head is a y tussle of unkempt hair. He’s been working himself hard.

“I ordered for you,” Yoongi mumbles, “If that’s okay,”

“Of course,” Sumi takes the ice cream and it, “Mmm my favourite,”

Yoongi takes the seat across from her, starting on his own ice cream.

“What do you want to do today?” Yoongi asks blankly. Sumi feels a little let down by his attitude. He doesn’t seem very happy to see her, nor does he look upset that it has been a while since they last saw each other.

Sumi’s heart breaks a little as she watches him for a moment. Eventually, he speaks again.

“Sumi?” He frowns, “Are you okay?”

“Well…” Sumi sighs, “It’s been a month since we’ve seen each other… We haven’t spoken in so long,”

Yoongi blushes with embarrassment. He rubs the back of his neck awkwardly, looking around as if the best response will be written somewhere in their environment.

“I’ve… I’ve been busy,” Yoongi replies eventually.

“Doing what?” Sumi asks quickly.

“Well… I’m a trainee now, you know. It’s hard,” Yoongi sighs.

“Wait…” Sumi sits forward, “You’re a trainee now?”

Yoongi blinks a couple of times until he realizes exactly what she means.

“Oh! I’m so sorry!” Yoongi laughs weakly, “I forgot to tell you. My audition was accepted. Namjoon and I are officially trainees. We leave for America next week,”

Sumi blinks a couple of times, her chest aching.

“You mean… something so important and so amazing happened to you and you didn’t think to tell me?” Sumi frowns, “You didn’t think to call, or text?”

“Well, I wasn’t sure if you wanted to know about it…” Yoongi takes a bite from his ice cream, “It wasn’t something you wanted me to do…”

“I want you to be happy!” Sumi bursts out, “I said last time that I’m willing to do everything for us, as long as you’re happy!”

“No, I said we should do what makes us happy,” Yoongi corrects her, “Yes, you said you’ll try long distance, but I thought we already confirmed that wasn’t going to work?”

Sumi recalls the conversation. She does remember Yoongi giving an example of why they can’t do long distance.

“But… I’m willing to try…” Sumi bites her lip, “Isn’t that enough?”

Yoongi sighs and looks down at the table. He seems to be thinking it over, but his expression doesn’t look promising.

 

“Sumi…”

“Yes?” She asks immediately.

“Why are you making this so hard?” Yoongi sighs deeply. This is the first time Sumi has ever seen Yoongi look so defeated, so… broken.

“What do you mean?” She demands.

“You pushed me into a corner… you made me feel this way,” Yoongi says gruffly, “I thought about what you said, and I realized we are just going in circles,”

“But…”

“Hold on,” Yoongi frowns, “We have problems, then we ignore them. We bottle up our feelings and then we never address them until they blow up. We’re a mess. Even our friends know we’re a mess,”

“But…” Sumi shuffles forward, grabbing Yoongi’s free hand, “I don’t want to lose you,”

Yoongi finally looks up at her. His eyes are a little red, but his gaze is holding her firmly. They watch each other for a while, Sumi pleading and Yoongi mulling things over.

After a moment, Yoongi speaks up.

“How about we go on a break,” Yoongi suggests.

“A break?” Sumi grimaces, “I don’t like the idea of that…”

“No, no, no,” Suddenly, Yoongi looks excited, “I’ll go away and do my studying for 3 years. If this is what we want… if this is real… if we love each other enough… then when I return I’ll propose to you,”

Sumi pouts sadly, looking up at Yoongi pleadingly.

“But what if you don’t love me anymore when you come back?” She reasons, “What if you forget me, or start loving someone else?”

Yoongi puts down his napkin, his ice cream gone. He gently wraps his hands around hers, smiling.

“I will always love you,” Yoongi smiles, “Even after everything that has been said between us, that has not wavered,”  

“You don’t know how you’ll feel when you’re away from me,” Sumi clenches her fist, “Can’t we just try long distance?”

“Sumi,” Yoongi says firmly, “Love or not, we have issues. We have some major problems we need to deal with before we start a life together,” He sighs, “Trust me, okay?”

 

Sumi considers Yoongi’s words. Yes, they have many problems. She has trust issues she needs to resolve, and they both need to stop bottling up their feelings like they don’t matter. Maybe this break will help them have a happier and more mature relationship.

“Okay…” She gulps, trying to control the tears that are swelling her cheeks, “I don’t like the idea, but I’m willing to try anything,”

Smiling, Yoongi stands. Sumi follows suit, feeling panicky. Is he leaving already?

Yoongi holds his hand out for her to take, smiling darkly, just like he does when he wants to kiss her.

“Come. Let’s go do something together,” He grins.

Sumi goes to take his hand when she notices something dangling from his wrist. Their couple bracelet, the one they bought a million years ago, is twinkling in the sunlight on his wrist.

She gasps as she begins ruffling through her pockets. She pulls out her bracelet and slides it over her hand.

Beaming, she grasps his hand firmly. He smiles down at the cuff on her hand before leading her down the mall.

Eventually, Sumi starts to realize that this might be the last day they spend together as a couple. She looks up at him, her chest aching again. Can she really do this?

As he smiles down at her, she ignores these feelings, bottling them up once again.

I’ll think about that later. She reprimands herself for wasting their precious time together worrying about the future.

None of that matters.

All that matters is that he loves her, and she loves him. In 3 years, they’ll be engaged.

 

 

“So, do you think this will work?” Sumi finishes, feeling rather breathless. After the date with Yoongi, Sumi sat up all afternoon fretting and worrying. She had to talk to someone. So, she decided to call Jennie. They are currently sitting in Jennie’s room, which is messy with medicine books and notes. Jennie herself is also rather messy, just like Yoongi.

Even though she was studying, Jennie invited Sumi over to hang out. She had mentioned that she had to talk about something as well.

Sumi has just finished explaining everything Yoongi had said to her that morning. Every single detail, so Jennie is unable to miss anything.

“A break huh…?” Jennie frowns as she looks down at her phone, “I don’t know… Breaks never work out,”

“Right?” Sumi says before lying down on the bed, burying her face into Jennie’s pillow, “Urgh!”

“Well… let’s say I was in this situation,” Sumi sits up as Jennie gets her serious face on.

“With Namjoon?” Sumi grins as Jennie blushes.

“You know, I’m surprised you didn’t tell anyone, even after what I did to you,” Jennie says quickly.

“I’m not like that,” Sumi blushes, realizing that she just hinted that Jennie is like that, “Anyway, let’s say you’re with Namjoon. What would you do?”

Jennie her head to the side, thinking seriously.

“Well,” She frowns, “I wouldn’t have done what you guys have done, really,”

“What?” Sumi pouts, frowning, “Are you saying we messed up?”

“Well, yeah, I thought that was obvious,” Jennie brushes her off, “Anyway if we did do that, I would recommend the break,”

“Why, though?”

“Because when you mess up that badly in a relationship, it’s a good idea to take a step back and think about your feelings a little more,” Jennie shrugs, “Work on whatever is ruining the relationship,”

 

 

…At the same moment at Yoongi’s house…

 

“So you don’t think it was a bad idea?” Yoongi asks Namjoon, who has been listening to Yoongi's rant ever since he came home, “What if she moves on?”

“That’s a risk you’ll have to take,” Namjoon says, looking a little worn out from practice yesterday, “Can we get back to our Language studies?”

 

 

“Jennie…” Sumi pouts as Jennie turns back to her work, “I really need your help…”

Jennie rolls her eyes, staring down at Sumi with annoyance.

“I really have to work,”

“Just a little more?” Sumi begs, her hands together in front of her. Jennie grins at Sumi’s cute expression and sighs.

“Fine,” She rolls her eyes again, “But what else needs to be said?”

“What if…” Sumi bites her lip, “What if he comes back with a girlfriend instead of a ring?”

“That’s a risk you’ll have to take,” Jennie says, “This is how you’ll work on your trust,”

“Okay,” Sumi sighs.

“Plus,” Jennie smirks, “You’ll be able to see other guys and figure out if he is really the one,”

Sumi gasps.

 

 

Yoongi gasps.

“How could you say that?” Yoongi admonishes Namjoon, “I could never look at other girls knowing Sumi is waiting for me here!”

“It’s true,” Namjoon shrugs, “You never know, maybe your relationship is juvenile and not meant to last long? Maybe you’re not meant to be together. A break is meant to help you figure these things out,”

“Are you meant to see other people on a break?” Yoongi asks seriously.

 

 

“Usually, yes, as far as I know,” Jennie nods, “That’s why people usually break up, on or after a break; because they don’t realize that’s the point,”

“But I don’t want to see other people,” Sumi groans, “Why can’t I have a normal relationship?”

 

 

“There is no such thing as a normal relationship, Yoongi,” Namjoon rolls his eyes, “Every relationship has its problems, that’s why breaks are so common,”

Yoongi considers this for a moment, before looking back at Namjoon.

“Do you think she will see other people too?”

“I doubt it…”

 

 

“… he’s not the sort of person to do that,” Jennie says, “I bet he’ll go over there, maybe check out a girl or two, but come back into your arms,”

“Do you think we’ll break up after our break?” Sumi asks.

 

 

“I don’t think you two will break up,” Namjoon admits, “You’re both very passionate, so work will come first,”

“Do you really think so?” Yoongi smiles a little.

“Oh, I know so,” Namjoon smirks, “Honestly, I give Sumi 6 months at most. She’ll email you or message you on social media about how much she misses you,”

 

 

“Yoongi wouldn’t message me something like that,” Sumi chuckles, “But… you’re probably right,”

Jennie nods and folds her arms.

“I know I’m right,” She sighs, “Now can I get back to work?”

“One more thing…” Sumi shuffles in her spot and looks up at Jennie seriously, “We’ll be fine, right?”

 

 

“You will definitely be fine,” Namjoon says, “You’ll be watching her walk down the aisle in no time,”

“Okay, I believe you,” Yoongi nods as confidence in his decision rises in his chest.

 

 

“Honestly, Sumi?” Jennie shrugs, “I have no idea if you’ll be fine,”

“What do you mean?” Sumi frowns.

“It’s up to you,” Jennie points to Sumi’s chest, “Follow your heart and see where it takes you. If you find it leads to another boy, do it,”

Sumi looks down at her lap, thinking…

What if Yoongi isn’t the one? What if the reason they have so many problems is that they are just not meant to be?

This thought depresses Sumi. She loves Yoongi so much. She is willing to change every fibre of her being to be better for him. But, in reality, should she have to do that for her soul mate? People are meant to grow as people as they get older and experience more things, but people shouldn’t be changing themselves for others, they should be changing for themselves. What does Sumi want to change about herself? And are any of these things in line with what Yoongi thinks she should be working on?

 

Sumi stands and pats Jennie on the shoulder.

“Thanks, Jennie, this means a lot to me,” She gives Jennie a small smile as she heads to the door.

“Oh! Before you go,” Jennie spins around in her chair to look at Sumi, whose hand is on the doorknob.

“Yeah?”

“Hoseok has some news for us,” Jennie grins, “He sounded excited,”

“What is it?” Jennie shrugs.

“I don’t know. We’re meeting him at a BBQ place near his house tomorrow night so he can tell us,” Jennie explains, “Do you want me to text you the address?”

“Yes, please,” Sumi smiles, “I’ll see you tomorrow then,”

“Sounds good,” Jennie grins, “I hope you feel better, goodnight!”

 

With that final cheer, Jennie turns back to her work, pushing her reading glasses up her nose and tucking her hair behind her ears, leaning closer to her textbook.

Feeling proud of her friend, Sumi leaves her to study. Her heart may be heavy with her mind on Yoongi, but she can’t help feeling excited at the prospect of spending time with her friends.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Getting a bit dramatic now~ 
This story is very personal to me so I hope you guys enjoy it~ Please comment what you think and upvote it if you are enjoying it! 
The title picture for this chapter is Sumi's novel cover! I made it myself so I hope you guys like it :D