Chance
HERSHEIrene was relieved Bogum didn't show up the next day. And as her mom promised, the bugging indeed stopped.
On the other hand, Seulgi has not called her yet. Irene's been waiting for that because hearing Seulgi's voice would help her forget her mom and Bogum for a little while.
Truth is, she feels confused.
The little girl that had been crushing on Bogum since the day Irene can't remember is still inside her. But what's adds up to her confusion is the feelings she's developed towards Seulgi.
It's different and similar in a way. She doesn't know what to make of it. Yet, she knows choosing one over the other can cause either a concord or a rift between her and mom.
Irene doesn't want to imagine the consequences yet.
Is there a way she could find out who matters most?
---
It was Sunday afternoon, after a trip to the grocery store when Irene and her mom saw the familiar black car in front of their gate.
"Now look at that." her mom pulled the car over.
Irene's eyes widened when Bogum stepped out from the driver's side and walked towards them.
"Hey." He leaned inside the car window on her mom's side.
"Hey, darling. It's great to see you." The older woman pinched Bogum's cheek. "Where have you been? Irene was waiting for you since Thursday."
"Mom!"
"I'm just kidding, darling." Irene's mom laughed.
"I was on an out-of-town business trip these past few days. I came back just last night," said Bogum.
"How long have you been waiting there? You should have called me or Irene to tell us you're dropping by. We went out to get some groceries."
"Nah. It's fine. It was just for a couple of minutes. And I don't have your numbers yet."
"Oh. I'll give it to you inside, okay?" said Irene's mom.
"That would be great." Bogum smiled at them. "By the way, can I help you with the groceries?"
---
"Thanks for the help." Irene's mom handed Bogum a glass of cold water.
"Thanks." Bogum handed back the glass after downing it. "And you're welcome."
"Do you have something to do this evening? I hope you could stay for dinner."
Irene was smiling as she put the condiments in the cabinet. She know her mom's pushing it again.
"Umm. Well... I was hoping I could take Irene out for dinner..." said Bogum.
Irene turned around to look at him, surprised.
"Really?" Irene's mom was surprised too.
"Y-yeah." Bogum nodded hesitantly. "If... if... if only Irene's available."
"Yeah. Sure. Of course, son," the older lady answered. "She doesn't have plans for the entire day either. Am I right, Irene?"
Irene met eyes with her mom and knew she needs to do her part of the deal. "Yes."
---
Bogum took Irene to a waterfront restaurant where they had a multi-course dinner overlooking a lake. It wasn't romantic, but not casual either.
Although Irene thought it would be awkward, like her previous dates before, it surprised Irene she's having fun again.
After their dinner, they went for a moonlit stroll at the park with a cup of tea in their hands. Most of the people around were couples having their own little worlds.
"So, you mean you never had a boyfriend? None at all?" asked Bogum, surprised.
"None at all. Why, don't I seem to be like that?" Irene tucked a strand of stray hair behind her ear when the wind blew.
"Nah. I just thought when you said you're single, it meant that you had past lovers. It didn't occur to me you were never in a relationship before."
"Yeah. Never been hitched." Irene chuckled.
Bogum chuckled too. "Why?"
"Why what?"
"Why not date? Don't tell me you never had suitors. I won't believe that."
Irene cupped her free hand over her head to prevent her hair from getting messier because of the wind. "I had quite a few. I even went out with them, but I guess it didn't work out for me."
"Why? Were you looking for something specific?"
Irene scrunched up her face. "I really don't know. Honestly, I'm starting to think maybe I'm the one with issues, not them."
"That's crazy!" Bogum laughed. "You don't have issues. You just haven't found your right puzzle piece for you yet."
A smile slipped across Irene's face, remembering the same exact line she told Bogum before.
"See? I remember that." Bogum pointed a finger at her. "But do you happen to like someone now?"
It took a few seconds for Irene to answer, "To be honest, I'm not sure."
"Mmm... so... there is someone, right?"
Irene nodded. "But I'm not sure if it's just a simple like or--" she paused and looked around the area before turning to Bogum. "Hey. How would you know if you're already in love with someone?"
Bogum blinked a few times. "I don't... know..." He shrugged. "Maybe if you get hurt because of him?"
Irene secretly smiled at the usage of "him".
"So, you're not sure if you just like him or if you're already in love with him, is that it?" asked Bogum, getting a nod from Irene. "How about him, do you think he likes you?"
"Well, he..." Irene swallows. "He's making me feel special. But I'm not sure of his intentions yet. We haven't talked about it. And the truth is I'm a bit torn over my feelings now."
"Torn? How?"
"I'm pretty sure you know how much my mom is vouching for you, right?" Irene looked at Bogum.
Bogum laughed. "Yeah. Felt that since New Year's Eve."
"Pretty obvious, eh?" Irene grimaced, feeling embarrassed. "The problem is, compared to you, I knew there's no way my mom would like him."
"Why wouldn't she?"
"It's just... too complicated." Irene pursed her lips. "Hey. You wanna know a secret?"
"Secrets are exciting."
"Brace yourself then."
"Oh. Sounds scary." Bogum shuddered, hugging himself.
They both laugh as they continue to walk along the path.
"Hmm. How should I say this?" Irene started. "My mom is vouching for you so hard is because she knows I always had a crush on you when we were little."
Bogum was speechless for seconds. "R-really?"
"Yeah. But that was a long, long time ago." Irene looked away, blushing a little. But that was a long time ago. I think I moved on from it after we moved out of the village. You still look likable to me, but I think my mom likes you more than me now."
Bogum laughed. "I've got a crush on you too before, you know."
Irene raised an eyebrow. "Are you joking?"
"I'm serious." Bogum put a finger on his chest and made an 'x' sign.
Irene couldn't take her eyes away from Bogum's chest, remembering a certain person doing that not so long ago.
"You always made me feel freaking nervous when you're near," continued Bogum. "That's the reason I don't talk to you whenever Minho isn't around. Could you guess when it stopped?"
"When your family moved out of the village?"
"Spot on!" Bogum snapped his fingers. "But to be honest, I still find you as attractive as you are when we were just kids. And after that dinner date the other day, I realized we somehow clicked. I don't know if you felt the same, but I enjoyed that night. I'm really thankful your mom asked me out. I knew there is a reason we met again that day. I just don't know the reason yet."
Irene stayed silent, unsure of how to respond to that.
"Is it just me or is it really starting to feel awkward around here?" Bogum chuckled, trying to lighten up the mood. "Anyway, straight to the point now. I stopped by your house today because during my trip these past two days I kept thinking about you."
Irene bites the inside of her cheeks. Not the direction she was expecting their convo to go down.
"I'm not trying to court you, okay?" Bogum faced her as he walked backward, the cup of tea against his chest. "But I want you to know how I feel towards you. And after hearing your story I realized we're in the same boat, confused about our feelings towards another person--Yoojung in my case--and torn with the idea that we still somehow, at some point, maybe like each other."
"I... I don't know what to say..." said Irene.
"You need not say anything." Bogum smiled and turned again to walk with Irene. "I'm not saying I already love you. What I'm saying is that I like you. And that doesn't change the fact that I'm still not over Yoojung yet. I won't deny that. It's only been three months since we broke up."
"So, what's your point in telling me these now?"
"We liked each other before but we got separated." Bogum looked down at his cup. "After a few years of no connection, we met again on New Year's Eve. After two months, here we are having tea. For some reason, we keep bumping into each other. Don't you think we should give it a chance?"
"What do you mean?"
"I really don't know what I'm saying." Bogum scratched his nape. "I didn't mean it to sound like we should be together, okay? What I'm trying to say is, can we attempt to find out if this thing between us will lead to something?"
Irene blinked. "But how?"
"I don't know. Maybe we should hang out more often? Go on dates?"
"Then how about Yoojung?"
Bogum took a deep breath. "As I told you, I haven't forgotten her completely yet. But I wanted to know if being with you can completely heal me. I think it's also an opportunity for you to find out what you're really feeling towards your guy."
Irene stared at Bogum, getting the point, and realizing how she can benefit from it too. Maybe she needs this distraction to find out if she's serious about Seulgi or not.
"I'm really confused." Irene exhaled. "I just hope that no one will get hurt if this ends out badly."
"I don't think it would end out badly though." Bogum sipped from his cup. "It's either we realize we're only fooling ourselves with each other. Or, who knows, maybe we'll fall in love in the end."
Irene chuckled. "Fall in love? You think that's possible?"
"Maybe? Who knows, right? At least we will finally get the answers to our questions and the dilemma after that."
The wind blew again reminding Irene of the recent storm that hit a nearby country. She looked up the horizon and took a deep breath.
She hopes she'll get the answer soon.
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