CHAPTER TWELVE; LIKE OLD TIMES.

"Memories scratch at my heart."

"I can't believe I was ever friends with the likes of a girl like you. Do you know how embarrassing it is to hear what people have to say about you? How much smack they're talking when Jooheon follows us around running his mouth off-"

"Of course I know how could I not hear it? Hyungwon I thought that it wouldn't get to us if we stuck together-"

"I'm not on this level, I'm not the dirt on the ground that people can walk on. Sticking together? You're the dirtiest of all Han Somi, how the hell could I stick with that? Being around you is making my life a living hell!"

"I'm sorry Hyungwon-"

"No, you're not!" Hyungwon bellowed, making Somi curl away from him, her back hit the locker with a thump and she swallowed, looking past the arm that she had held up to protect her face from Hyungwon's swinging hands.

"You're not sorry! You're just a leech that won't let go of me to make yourself look better!" 

Jooheon rounded the corner in the corridor. He stopped where he was, eyes growing in size and hands in his pockets forming fists.

"Make myself look better? As if any of that's important to me right now Hyungwon! You're the one that always leapt for joy when any of the popular kids wanted to work on group projects with any of us! You're the one that changes their hair cut every time some girl says she likes something that you don't have, not me! Being better than everyone else was never my priority it was yours!" Somi pushed Hyungwon away when he tried to stand over her and she glared at him with dark eyes.

"So be it if you don't want to be my friend Chae Hyungwon, I'm sick of holding onto people that don't need me the same way I need them. Go and have your fun trying to one-up every person you come across" Somi turned away, not letting Hyungwon see the tears that finally leaked from her eyes as she ran away.

"Somi!" Hyunwoo exclaimed, grabbing the girl before she could collide with him. Somi fought out of his grip and kept running, head down to avoid anyone seeing her tears.

"What have you done to her?" Hyungwon looked at Hyunwoo, eyes still full of anger and chest heavily rising and falling with each frustrated breath he took.

"Someone has to do it, put her back in her place, right?" Jooheon smirked from the other side of Hyungwon, revealing his presence. Hyunwoo looked to him in disbelief, but the look quickly left his eyes when he shook his head.

"I don't know if I was expecting you to do this before all of this or if I'm surprised. Either way, I'm disappointed that you would still do this" Hyunwoo ignored Jooheon in favour of  looking at Hyungwon, who didn't react to either of them

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"What do you think you're doing?!" The only reaction Hyungwon gave was to look back over his shoulder, hand still shaking the can of spray paint at his side as he lazily looked back at a panic-stricken Changkyun.

"You're here again? Come to cry to the dead about how jealous you are of them? Still wishing it was you instead of him every time you cut yourself?" Hyungwon asked him casually, half attempting to turn his lips up in a smirk but not having the energy to as Changkyun's hands formed into fists at his sides.

"Get away from the grave" Changkyun growled warningly and Hyungwon scoffed.

"Or what? you'll scratch me up the same way you do to yourself?" Hyungwon dared to retort, popping the lid of the spray can and throwing it over his shoulder towards Changkyun. It hit his chest and fumbled to down to the green grass. It didn't have time to hand by his feet as Hyungwon pressed down on the nozzle and Changkyun ran forward with strength in his legs.

The gravestone didn't budge when both bodies were forced over it. It hurt Changkyun's legs to kick into it and the landing on the ground once they went down was rough but Changkyun ignored it with a sharp breath in. He grabbed Hyungwon by his shirt and pushed him onto his back. Changkyun swung his fists and Hyungwon shut his eyes as it crashed into his jaw and forced his head into the grass.

"Are you out of your mind?!" Changkyun paid no mind to the blood spouting from Hyungwon's mouth hat tainted his fist or how much it hurt to punch straight into the bones of another person, he was too angry, to disgusted to care for any temporary pain.

"Why are you acting like he was never your friend?! Why would you do this as if he deserves to be dead?!" Changkyun couldn't tell how he was stopped, he didn't know how Hyungwon had been able to change the roles so that he was on top of him, squeezing down on his throat. Changkyun's eyes grew wide and his mouth opened, trying to gasp for any air that he can get.

"What makes you so big and great huh? Why are you acting like you're a friend? You're just another one hurting themselves to gain attention. You don't care that Yoo Kihyun's dead at all" Changkyun rasped, hands clawing, nails digging into the skin of Hyungwon's arms, drawing blood that remained under Changkyun nails when they pulled away to dig into Hyungwon's skin again.

"What's it matter to you what I do here huh?!" Changkyun's head thumped into the grass with a slam but it was Hyungwon's features that contorted into pain.

"You're just a good for nothing so what do you care!" 

Changkyun fell to the floor with a gasp of air that filled his lungs. His eyes snapped open and his hands danced over the carpet in confusion, unknowing to how he had gotten to where he was. Big breaths in and big breaths out. Changkyun could feel his lungs aching for air that they were already getting and his throat felt tight as if there was still hands wrapped around it, pushing down on his windpipe. Unfocused eyes cast around the room, flicking to look in every direction, hoping to figure out where he was.

Curtains stopped the sunshine from pouring into the room and lighting it up, but with it leaking through the cracks in the material, Changkyun could still see where he was. He was sweating, hands clammy, his throat was dry though, more desperate for water than he was before he fell asleep. He couldn't even remember how he fell asleep.

Somi's office, he realised he was in Somi's office but he still couldn't really understand how he had managed to fall asleep or where Somi had gone. Slowly, his breathing came back to normal, and though his legs felt like jelly, Changkyun was able to stand on his feet with the help of a hand on the chair that he could remember sitting in. Changkyun didn't notice when the door to the office opened, the one responsible was trying to be as gentle and as quiet as possible when she opened the door, only to sigh in relief when she saw Changkyun standing there, looking at the closed curtains. Changkyun flinched spinning on his heel with enlargened eyes, relaxing his muscles when Somi smiled sheepishly at him.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you" Somi apologised and Changkyun swallowed, combing his hair back.

"When did I fall asleep" Changkyun asked and Somi pulled out her phone to check the time.

"Two hours ago maybe?" She shrugged, looking back up as Changkyun cursed from the shock of her answer.

"Are you ok? Somi carefully asked him, watching as Changkyun pulled the curtains open once again and brought sunlight back into Somi's office. He squinted and covered his eyes from the sun with his hand, humming.

"I was just confused when I woke up" Somi nodded and entered the office, shutting the door behind her.

"You look flushed, are you sure you're ok?" She asked again and Changkyun turned around, nodding his head.

"Yeah, I'm going to go and get some water" Changkyun stopped at the door and looked back at Somi, who was watching him with gleaming eyes, mouth open as if she was ready to say something, but she didn't speak and so Changkyun did.

"Thank you for letting me rest in your office" He bowed, opening the door and leaving as Somi bowed, staying down until Changkyun had closed the door and walked away. Somi flicked the hair away from her eyes when she stood straight again, looking at the door that was once keeping Changkyun in her office. She sat in the chair behind her desk and sunk down in the seat, closing her eyes as she breathed out heavily.

"Where have you gone Kihyun?"

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Somi was confused when she entered her apartment to already find Kihyun sitting on the couch, staring blankly at the TV with the remote sitting next to him. She put her bag down and crossed her arms in front of her chest, not able to help it when her eyes narrowed themselves down on Kihyun. Kihyun's head turned slowly when he moved to look at her and Somi raised an eyebrow at him.

"When did you get home?" She inquired and Kihyun shrugged his shoulders.

"I left while you were eating," He told her, turning back to watch the TV. Somi clucked her tongue and left to disappear into her room, leaving Kihyun alone in the living room again. Kihyun turned back to look at the sullen sag of Somi's shoulders once her back was to him and he bit down on his bottom lip. Somi shut the door to her room, something she rarely did, even with Kihyun following her around, that was when Kihyun knew that she was seriously upset with him. Somi stood on the other side of her door, exhaling as she looked down at the ground. She couldn't help how sullen she was feeling, having wondered where Kihyun was all afternoon just to find out he had taken himself home without seeing a reason to inform her. Even when her phone rang in her back pocket, she stood there listening to it first before deciding that she should probably see who was trying to get in contact with her.

"Minhyuk" Somi breathed out with the phone to her ear.

"I need your help" Minhyuk declared and Somi's back went straight as her eyes went wide.

"What's wrong?" She rushed out, hand already on her door handle, ready to shoot back out of her room.

"It's these freaking curtains!"

"What?" She frowned, pausing.

"The curtains! They've been torn and now I need new ones and I don't know where to even go to get new curtains. How do you measure curtains? Where do we sell curtains and should I just take one of these ones in so they can match the length between the new ones and the old ones?" Somi sagged against the door, closing her eyes as she breathed out.

"Minhyuk, I thought you had your together" She muttered and Minhyuk hummed.

"I did until my house got broken into"

"What?!" Somi shot up again, this time swinging the door open and running out.

"It's fine though, they only stole some plates, my TV, a few pairs of underwear from the horseline and made bit of a mess, so I need to get new curtains" Minhyuk rattled off and Somi held the phone to her ear with her shoulder as she forced her feet back into the shoes she had been wearing.

"Minhyuk what the hell? Why are you so calm right now?" She snapped.

"The police are onto it, my TV is being compensated and I just want new curtains, maybe another set of plates so I don't have an incomplete set sitting in my kitchen" He drawled and Somi grunted, swinging the apartment door open.

"Where are you going?" Kihyun called out, only to hear the door slamming shut as his response.

"What's your address? I'm coming over" Somi grabbed her phone before it could drop and clenched her keys in her other hand, legs scampering to the elevator doors.

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"This is what you call a little bit of a mess?" Somi looked around Minhyuk's living room and he nodded, humming.

"Yeah, I've cleaned up most of it"

"My god Minhyuk!" Somi exclaimed at the use of Minhhyuk's casual tone.

"What?"

"How are you so casual about this? Your house was broken into"

"The police say they know who it was, they've broken into a few places and they'll have them in no time" Minhyuk shrugged.

"Now, how do I get new curtains?" Minhyuk pointed to his destroyed curtains. Somi took one look at them and groaned loudly.

"Look, let's just measure the length of the pole they're on and then we can go to the store to pick out some new ones, ok?" Somi suggested and Minhyuk nodded, turning on his heels.

"I'll go and look for a measuring tape then," He told her and Somi watched him scatter away to a place that she couldn't see. Somi looked around the living room and sighed, it wasn't just a little bit of a mess, whoever these people were that Minhyuk didn't seem worried about, had left destruction behind.

"Lee Minhyuk" Somi clucked her tongue and set to work on picking up the clothes surrounding the fallen horseline in front of a bookshelf that was stripped of its contents. She heaved a deep breath and picked up the first handful to fold into a neat pile that was stacked on Minhyuk's couch by the time he came back. Somi moved the fallen horseline and started on the books and photo frames that had been dropped, taking a moment to look at the photos before she put them on the shelf gently.

"Ah, you don't have to do that!" Minhyuk's hands waved in a flurry when he came out of hiding with a measuring tape in his grip. Somi waved him off the same way and went back to the things on the floor.

"I'm cleaning them up now so that you won't have to later!" 

"I can do that once we sort these curtains out!" Minhyuk snatched the books from Somi's hands and shoved them on the shelf.

"I can do it!"

"Help me measure this first" Minhyuk pulled Somi over to the curtains and she huffed.

"Fine, hold that and stand there" Somi pushed Minhyuk closer to the curtains and walked to the other side, extending the measuring tape.

"Put it where the material ends," Somi told him and Minhyuk walked closer to the centre of the curtains.

"No the other end!" Somi exclaimed and Minhyuk grumbled at her.

"You should have said that"

"You should have used your head" She snapped back and Minhyuk glared at her.

"I'm this close to packing up and moving out of the country again" Minhyuk gestured to the width between them and Somi scoffed.

"So it's not that tempting yet"

"I like my job too much to leave it," Minhyuk told her and Somi snorted.

"Great, I dro everything to rush to your aid and it's not even me that's keeping you from leaving"

"Shut up and tell me what the measurement is"

"Done," Somi told him, walking back to his side and confiscating the measuring tape. Somi walked back to Minhyuk's front door and began to put on her shoes as Minhyuk gaped at her.

"What was the length?" He asked.

"I've decided not to tell you" Somi explained in a dismissive tone.

"How am I going to buy new curtains if I don't even know what length I need?"

"I've also decided to do that," Somi looked up as Minhyuk walked over to put on his shoes, "because you seem utterly useless at this kind of thing, did your parents not teach you this sort of stuff?"

"No" Minhyuk huffed and Somi snorted.

"Clearly"

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"There, now you have new curtains" Somi dusted her hands off as she and Minhyuk collapsed on the couch.

"Thank you"

"Of course" Somi nodded and Minhyuk looked at her.

"I mean it, thanks a lot Somi, I know I'm casual but I really wouldn't have been able to handle this mentally if you didn't come to my rescue," He told her and Somi shrugged her shoulders.

"All I did was argue with you for the evening"

"But I like that," Minhyuk admitted, "it was like old times when we were close and all we did was argue about every decision we had to make" Minhyuk looked away with a smile, thinking about on their times together and Somi hummed.

"Are you hungry?" Minhyuk asked Somi, jumping back to life.

"Oh, I should probably go home and have dinner" Somi nodded.

"No have dinner here! " Minhyuk waved Somi off dismissively as he popped back onto his feet and scampered to the kitchen.

"You don't mind?" Somi followed after him and Minhyuk snorted.

"I would have let you go home if I minded it," He told her and Somi hummed.

"Trust you to still be honest" She muttered.

"I was just going to cook pasta, are you ok with that?" He asked, ignoring Somi's comment. Somi nodded and entered the kitchen behind Minhyuk.

"I can start on the meat if you like"

"Sure" Giving her the tools she needed to prepare the meat, Somi took them gratefully and went to work, spending her time in casual conversation as she followed Minhyuk's directions. The air remained light as they served up the food and put away the extras, Somi took their bowls to Minhyuk's dining table, which was thankfully not damaged, and set them on either side. Minhyuk followed with glasses and cutlery in his hands that he put down on the table with a content breath out.

"Apple juice?"

"Of course" Somi nodded and Minhyuk went back to the fridge. Somi sat down and a jug of apple juice was put in front of her, she watched as Minhyuk transferred its contents to both their glasses and put the jug to the side, raising his glass towards her.

"Bone apple teet" He smiled and Somi refused to clink her glass against his.

"Don't even start with this Minhyuk"

"You're the one that stayed for dinner, now accept the care that you are being provided as a guest" He demanded and Somi rolled her eyes, conceding.

"Thank you, the chef will not be taking complaints"

"I literally prepared half of this" Somi pointed out and Minhyuk shrugged his shoulders.

"Then you would want to enjoy the meal"

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"And what do I do with my head?" Hyunwoo asked.

"Just relax it, otherwise your neck will get sore and it won't be enjoyable anymore," Jooheon told so Hyunwoo stopped holding his head up.

"My feet are touching the window"

"You have long legs, don't worry about it" Jooheon waved a  hand at Hyunwoo who hummed, looking across his office.

"This is nice" He commented.

"It feels cool if you just let your arms flop down too," Jooheon told and his hands thumped against the carpet. Hyunwoo looked at Jooheon before copying him with a thump of his own.

"Isn't this relaxing?"

"Yeah" Hyunwoo breathed out.

Somi knocked on the door from outside of Hyunwoo's office with her eyes on her laptop and Hani blabbering in her ear behind her, her hand fumbled for the door handle. She pushed the door open and entered Hyunwoo's office without looking up from the laptop that was purched on her arm. Hani stumbled into the office with her and Somi cleared .

"Hyunwoo the design plans from that streetwear company have come back through the email you should have a look at it-" Somi looked up and stopped in her tracks, Hani was silent, wide eyed as she stood behind Somi.

"Why are you upside down on the couch?" Somi asked and Jooheon and Hyunwoo looked at each other.

"You wanted to act childish at least once" Somi breathed out heavily, walking over to Hyunwoo's desk to put her laptop down. 

"Jooheon said he had a good method for relaxing" Hyunwoo explained, changing his position to be sitting the right way up on the couch with a grunt for effort. Jooheon quickly did the same and Somi looked at him, quirking a brow.

"I've seen too many weird things in this place" Hani grumbled to herself and turned out of the room, forgetting about the paperwork that she was bringing to Hyunwoo.

"Don't you have clients to be inking?" She asked him and Jooheon shrugged his shoulders.

"It's quiet at the moment," He told her and Somi let out another breath.

"As I was saying Hyunwoo," Somi gave her boss a look and he jumped to his feet.

"Yes the email, was it sent to me also?" He asked as he rounded his desk to sit down.

"Yes" Somi gave a single nod and Hyunwoo tugged on the collar of his shirt while he waited for his laptop to start up.

"So," He looked at Somi, "have you have lunch yet?" He asked her and Somi shook her head.

"It's eleven o'clock" She answered and Hyunwoo nodded, typing away on his laptop.

"Right, what are your thoughts on the design plans?" He asked, pushing his discomfort away to go into business mode.

"They alright, I can envision it but even Hani can see gaps where they haven't done the work they need to do," Somi told him and Hyunwoo sighed as he clicked on the email and began to read through it.

"We're going to have to decline"

"What?" Somi looked up from her own laptop in shock to see Hyunwoo pressing his brows together as he looked over the long email again.

"If they can't do their part then the project isn't going to succeed"

"What do we tell them then?" Somi asked and Hyunwoo in a breath.

"I'll construct a formal email and send it to them to let them know," Hyunwoo told her and Somi rubbed her face, sitting down in the seat across from Hyunwoo.

"They're not gonna be happy"

"Stiff, they're the ones expecting a project that they don't do any work on" Somi began working away on her laptop and Jooheon moved in closer, taking the seat next to her.

"Honestly, how do people expect to run a business like this?" Hyunwoo continued to grumble to himself and Somi looked up, watching his face as it scrunched up in frustration.

"You're stressing yourself out" Somi pointed out. Hyunwoo exhaled and shoved the laptop away from him, his fingers pushed down on his temples and Somi sighed, closing the lid of her laptop.

"How about we go get something to eat? You're probably hungry right?" Somi suggested and Hyunwoo nodded, not hesitating to stand up and grab his phone and wallet.

"Let's go down to the cafe, I'll grab Changkyun"

"I'll get my things" Somi nodded, standing up.

"I'll watch you get your things" Jooheon added, following Somi out of Hyunwoo's office. Hyunwoo took one last look at the draft email he was making up and slammed his laptop shut, walking away without looking back.

Hello everyone,

After hesitating over the past few days, I have decided that I cant go without updating this story. The past few days have been hard, I have been in denial, full of anger and I've lost courage, gained it back and lost it again on repeat. Monsta X was my stable group, they were the group that I listened to day in and day out without fail, they were what calmed me down when I was scared, anxious or just overly emotional, they were such a tight-knit group that I never worried over the thought of this happening to us. So when I saw the news about Wonho, I didn't know how to cope with it, I broke down, refused to continue breaking down, just to have another breakdown and get angry at myself for crying about it.

It brought me to the conclusion that I can't be someone who sits and silent gloom, I have to help to fight for the rights of our boys and other groups. I'm sorry that I didn't upload some sort of note to you sooner, I didn't know how to say anything and have been furiously sending messages of love to the boys in the fan cafe and grouping with Tumblr monbebe's for the past few days as a way to cope.

Just know that I will always be here, if you need something said in the fan cafe, need someone to talk with or just another person to distract yourself with, I'll be here.

I'm going to continue fighting, continue this story and I'm going to stay positive because I believe that 7-1=0.