She had been watching him for about 10 minutes. She knew she’d hate it if their roles were reversed but she couldn’t pull her eyes away. He was exquisite. And he was not made of petals. It was all muscle and vein and kindness and trust, and it was all so indicative of who Jaehyun was.

It was one night.

A long night.

But Jaehyun spent it learning about everything that made her tick. Like when his lips found her neck she’d immediately melt and sigh loudly, gripping his hair as if it grounded her. Or when he laced their fingers together and held them over her head her eyes would glaze over with a dazed smile. Or when he brushed her lips with his teasingly, she’d wait exactly 2.5 seconds before leaning up and closing the gap with no patience. Or when he’d let his fingers drift below her hip bone her eyes would widen, her jaw would drop, and a sharp gasp of his name would crack through the air before it steamed into a moan.

She shivered constantly as she reimagined his palms sliding down her sides, up her back, and in her hair. It was the way he mumbled reassurances constantly in the way of “you’re breathtaking” "you're trying to ruin me" or “you’re doing so well” and it was nothing she was used to; she didn’t realize how much it overwhelmed her with emotion.

But nothing devastated her more than when it was all over and she slumped in his arms and he gathered her up, her hair tenderly, kissing the side her head while whispering, “I’ve got you, sweetheart.”

She curled up further and just wished he’d wake up, hair perfectly tousled, shirtless, passed out. She wanted him to wake. To touch her, to kiss her in broad daylight long after the influence of the night wore off. He shifted, sliding his arm under his pillow and in the process slowly opened his eyes. He blinked and for a moment his face was blank, and her heart stilled until that glorious smile curled up his face.

“Morning.” She muttered, her voice raspy and his insides completely melted. The sun skimmed the side of her face, highlighting her cheekbones, coating her in a cozy warmth that made his bed dangerously welcoming, to the point where he might not ever leave. 

He slipped his arm under the covers, wound it around her waist and slid her towards him, “A ing dream come true, aren’t you?”

“I’ve made you cuss like a sailor. Did you hear yourself last night?” She blurted out. His smile grew and she felt everything fall right.

“Yeah,” he whispered, mainly to himself, “a dream come true.”

-----

When she woke again, a few hours later, Jaehyun wasn’t next to her in bed and the apartment smelled like eggs. Everything should’ve been fine, and happy and wonderful but now that he was gone and she was left with the stark reminder of waking up cold and alone, something changed.

All she felt was fear.

What the hell was she thinking, sleeping with him so quickly?

She could hear her mother’s scolding voice telling her about how men stripped you of your independence and only cared about the fastest way to get in your bed.

“.” She whispered, rubbing her face.

She should’ve just told him how she felt and asked him on a date. Why did she sleep with him? He must think she was easy, that the passion and tension were gone. She had immensely ruined their relationship or whatever left of it there was, and it had barely started. She told Dr.Lee that she wanted to date, that she didn’t want one-night stands and what did she go and do?

Panicking, she grabbed clothes off the ground, unsure if it was his or hers, and threw them on as quietly as possible. Holding her breath, she cracked the door open and tip-toed out in a way that had become second nature to her. His back was turned to her as he tended to the stove, his soft humming glazing over the crackling of the oil.

She had made it halfway to the door when his voice rang out, “Breakfast is almost done, you could eat before you sneak out, sweetheart.”

She took a sharp breath, looking up as he slowly turned, setting a plate of eggs down on the dinner table. She couldn’t tell what made her heart stop, the pet name, the food, or the way he looked like every salvation she ever dreamed of.

“Adopted the nickname quick, huh?” She said weakly.

He smiled to himself and it warmed her up, “Feels like I let out a breath I didn’t know I was holding.”

God, GOD he drove her mad with the way he laced his words together so beautifully and so sincerely.

“Why not something more modern like baby?” She didn’t know why she was having this conversation with him.

He stared at her straight. “Because you’re not a baby, nor do I baby you. But you have a sweet heart and I adore you for it.”

“ing hell.” She blurted out, covering her face with her hand and turning away. He was too much, and she couldn’t function properly, she hadn’t prepared for him to act this way and it hurt how good it felt. It was going to be torturous if he continued to be so blatant with his emotions.

She felt gentle fingers brush her hair aside and shivered when she felt him card through her strands, his chest brushing her back, “I don’t need to use a nickname if you hate I—”

“No!” She blurted. “I just need time to acclimate.”

“To what, sweetheart?” He murmured. The word rolled off his tongue so naturally.

She turned to look at him and felt every doubt fade like a useless thought. It was him. She knew him. He was familiar. He was good. This could be okay. “To you.” She finally said.

“Is that why you were sneaking out?” He asked.

She looked at her feet, “I just wasn’t sure if things would change in the morning.”

“Things have changed after last night, but I think it’s a good change.”

She looked up at him, “I think so too.”

His smile was so understanding, so kind as he let his hand fall to his side, “Take your time, detective, I’ll be here. Making you eggs every morning that you’ll let me.”

The way he called her detective sounded different too. It sounded like he was still calling her sweetheart and it left her in a mildly delirious daze. She was glad he hadn’t mentioned how the night before she was adamant that she had thought this entire thing over. That she was confident in her decision. And that hadn’t changed at all.

It was hard, navigating this change in her mind. This wasn’t just uncharted territories. This was an uncharted planet. This was mixing foreign chemicals together hoping nothing would explode. But she stared at him, humming softly as he made her breakfast, relaxed and lazy like he hadn’t pinned her to his mattress just hours earlier with every intention to turn her brain and muscle into mush. And it made her soft.

She was vulnerable in front of him and he didn’t gain power from it. He didn’t take her vulnerability to make himself stronger, he took her vulnerabilities from her and gave her his in exchange. There weren’t many men like him. There weren't many she felt safe with.

So, maybe her heart would become a little clumsier. Maybe she had no ing clue what she was doing or how to do it right. Maybe she was right, trusting someone this much was foolish, and her mother knew all along.

But it was Jaehyun and if she was going to learn how to do this, on god it had to be with him and no one else.

“Okay.” She rasped.

He turned and with the sun blaring behind him, outlining him in gold and heat something close to determination and a stone throw away from love painted over her features.

Dressed in last nights clothes, smelling distinctly of him, Jaehyun swore that if she asked him to do a backflip he would learn.

“Okay.” He repeated back. She didn’t need to expand. He didn’t need an emotional speech.

She walked over and picked up the package of unopened bacon and switched on the stove before standing next to him, making breakfast for two.

Okay.

-----

Ayeon’s phone started to ring as she set the dishes in the sink. Breakfast was different, his legs were tangled with hers and she couldn’t remember laughing so much at the little things that floated back and forth between them. It was new, letting him drag his fingers lightly across swathes of her skin whenever he walked by her, it was different than when he would do it before. He used to do it to soothe her, now he did it to feel her.

It was so nice.

“Can you grab that?” She mumbled.

Jaehyun glanced at her phone, “It’s Soya.”

And then he switched it to speaker mode.

“Can you please explain to me why Johnny Suh just told me, without me asking, that you MOANED JAEHYUN’S NAME WHEN HE KISSED YOU!” Soya screamed.

Ayeon froze, blood draining from her body as she dared to look at Jaehyun, fighting off the horror. He was still, his face betraying nothing as he stared at her phone like it was magic. She barely thought of a reply before Soya continued her rant.

“First of all, I’m concerned that Johnny feels close enough to me to just share this information but apparently after dinner he kissed you—”

Ayeon launched at the phone, but Jaehyun was quicker, grabbing it off the table and holding it to his ear.

“—and you said Jaehyun’s name and when he asked you about it, you said he misheard and then you just ran away from him in the middle of a rainstorm.”

“Soy-“

“For the love of god, Ayeon, if you like Jaehyun just te—”

She wrenched the phone of his hands, jamming her finger against the screen until she ended the call. Silence fell over them as they held a long-heated gaze, neither of them dared to speak as Ayeon tried to catch her breath.

“One question.” He finally said.

She shot him a dirty look, “No.”

He stepped towards her, his eyes glazed and his fingers curling into a fist, “How did it sound?”

“What?” She breathed out.

“Did you moan my name the same way you did last night, in my hands?” He murmured, sliding his hands around her waist and drawing her in.

“Oh my god.” She said with an incredulous laugh before turning away but he was closer now, close enough to cup her face and turn her towards him.

“Is it insanely barbaric how hot the thought of you my name in front of another man is?”

“ off.” She breathed out before she pushed herself up on her toes to kiss him.

He laughed into , smoothing his palms around her back to pull her in closer, causing her to smile back. Triple squeezed between their legs as Ayeon leaned back to bump their noses together. He grinned mischievously, “Let me do one more thing.”

“What?” She whispered.

He his lips, moving slowly towards her until his mouth brushed her neck. She gasped, clawing her fingers into his shoulder as her head fell back, blissed out. His kisses were probative at first, just skimming different parts of her neck until he hit one spot that had a sound tumbling out of her lips. Smiling against her skin, his kisses grew harder, just at the one spot until he bit down, and sin fell from her lips.

“Jaehyun.” She moaned.

He pulled away at such speed that Ayeon nearly tipped backward if it wasn’t for his hand around her waist, “So, it sounded like that? I could live with you kissing someone else if it sounded like that.”

Her jaw dropped as she held the side of her neck, “Who are you?”

He laughed, “You made me like this.”

“I should go, I need to shower and change clothes.” She mumbled with a glare.

He would’ve offered his shower and his clothes but he knew she wanted to use that time to collect her thoughts. He reached out and cupped her cheek. No matter how everything else took getting used to, his touch never did. It never felt foreign and strange. In fact, she was sure it was one of the things that kept her from dashing away from her feelings and fears.

“I feel trashy, letting yo