A big day for both of them.

It was snowing, a signal that the month had come to an end. Stores were pulling out their tinsel and Christmas trees, getting into the month-long festive season. Ayeon wasn’t big on the holidays, she preferred being a part of the small crew of holiday staff that stayed at the precinct while others celebrate.

She wrapped her scarf tightly around her neck and braced herself against the wind as she made her way to Jaehyun’s shop. It was steadily becoming one of the core places of her mind, like the place we go to escape pain. 

She swung the door open and stared at the empty counter in confusion, “Morning, detective.”

Ayeon turned to see Jaehyun standing in the corner, next to a Christmas tree with a gold ornament hanging off his finger.

“Right on the holiday spirit, not missing a beat.” She quipped.

He walked to the counter with Triple following behind. Ayeon held out a treat before her eyes widened, “Are you kidding me? Look at him!”

Jaehyun grinned at Triple’s jingle bell collar and little Santa outfit. “So adorable that I might puke.”

She rubbed Triple between the eyes, making him keen before standing and leaning against the counter.

Jaehyun set a travel mug on the counter and nudged it towards her, “For the road.”

She picked it up, her skin pebbling at the radiating warmth, “Should I ask?

“Black tea.” He said with a smile, “Your favourite.”

She rolled her eyes but tightened her grip around it, “I won’t be around today.”

“First day of therapy? How do you feel?” He asked while drying his hands.

She shrugged, getting her gaze away, “I’m not sure. Nervous, I guess.”

“You’ll do fine, detective. Remember what I said?”

She waved her hand vaguely, “Yes, yes, open mind and all.”

“Any holiday plans?” He asked.

She shook her head and took a sip of the tea, “You?”

“The shop. People run in for last minute gifts, poinsettias, tree ts, and other holiday floral décor.” He answered, “It’s just gonna be me and Triple.”

“And me, makes it three.” She said quickly before turning on her heel and walking out.

He, unlike Ayeon, didn’t fight back his smile and just let it grow across his face in a blinding beam. She was by the door when he called out to her, “Hey, can you…come around here after work?”

“Sure, is everything okay?” She asked with a frown.

He nodded, “Yeah, yeah everything is fine, I just need to do something, but I’d like if you came with.”

She smiled in confusion, “Of course. I’ll come around when you close?”

There was something about her that was comforting, reassuring, trustworthy. Of course. She said it like she couldn’t imagine ever saying no. Like it was natural to assume that if he ever had to ask her for a favour, she'd drop everything to be there. He wasn't sure what to do with that feeling, but he let it rest over his heart. 

“Perfect. Have a nice day, detective.”

-----

Ayeon was waiting nervously for 20 minutes in the waiting room outside the therapist’s office, staring at the miniature waterfall fixture sitting on the receptionist’s desk.  Her knee wouldn’t stop bouncing and just as her heart began to beat at a normal pace, er phone buzzed against her waist and she glanced at the screen before frowning. It was from Mina again.

911! I’m serious! Call me ASAP!

Ayeon made a face of annoyance before blocking Mina’s number and shoving her phone back into her pocket. She didn’t need to be stressed out by a nuisance anymore than she already was about coming to this session.

“You can head inside now.” The receptionist prompted with a smile.

Ayeon kept her head down and walked into the minimalist furnished office before taking a seat on the couch across for a young woman with a calming face and a wardrobe straight out of the American 1950’s.

“I think I should start with the fact that I’m not good with emotion.” Ayeon blurted after a moment of silence passed.

The woman adjusted her glasses and blinked at her, “Hello, my name is Dr.Lee. You must be Detective Yoo.”

“You can call me Ayeon.” She said nervously.

“Ayeon. It’s a pleasure to meet you. I’ve spoken to your Team Lead, she briefed me on the two major incidents that have occurred in your career as of late. I’d like to start by reminding you that everything that we speak about in our sessions is strictly confidential unless you prove to be a threat to yourself or to others. Detective Kim requires periodical updates but none of that will include details about what is shared. These sessions will determine if you’re fit to fully return to work as you’re currently working limited hours. Now, you were talking about your emotions?” Her entire spiel felt like it was delivered in one breath.

“Actually, I don’t, and that’s sort of my problem. Look, I’m here because I have to, but I do want to get something out of these…sessions. I’m just not good at expressing myself or talking about what bothers me, so I worry this all might be a moot point.” Ayeon held her breath and braced herself for Dr. Lee’s wrath. It had barely been 5 minutes and she was already feeling like a failure. Could she really fail at therapy? 

But instead, she smiled, “Ayeon, you don’t have to worry. Try not to think of this as a formal interview or counseling session. We can just talk, it doesn’t matter about what. We can talk about the weather, what your day was like, world politics, whatever you’re comfortable with. We'll take this one session at a time, growth will happened naturally.”

Ayeon gulped, “Okay.”

“There’s no need to be nervous, I’ve spoken to plenty of cops closed off and much less willing to try than you and have still made some worthwhile progress. You’re not a lost cause, contrary to what you may think of yourself, you are not incapable of emotion or expressing yourself. I think you’re just unfamiliar with how to do it and we can work on it together.”

Her shoulders unwound a fraction and for a second, her heart skipped a beat in anticipation, “That sounds good.”

“But first, how was your day yesterday?”

-----

“It’s been ages since we did this!” Soya exclaimed as Ayeon sat down across from her at a lunch spot not too far from the precinct.

Her mood had hit a high when she walked out of therapy earlier. It wasn’t necessarily because there was a massive breakthrough that enlightened her on her repressed emotions and set everything right, but it wasn’t a train wreck either. She told Dr. Lee about her day, they shared small talk, nothing too probing or personal and set a time for next week.

She liked the good doctor and although she knew that she couldn’t keep dodging her emotions forever, she felt good for making a start. Taking a step. Maybe it wasn’t going to be all that bad, maybe this would help.

Ayeon hummed and knocked her boot against Soya’s heel, “I know. I haven’t seen you in a while. Feels like ages.”

“How did therapy go?” She asked.

Ayeon nodded, “Good start, we’ll see how it goes from here. I like her.”

“Dr. Kim? Oh yeah, I went to her for a while after the…you know.” Soya’s smile faltered a second before it brightened up, “She was fantastic. I’m so happy for you!”

“Ugh, I’ve missed you.” Ayeon crooned. No one was quite as sunny the way Soya was. 

“Last time I saw you, it was at Jaehyun’s apartment.” Soya said evenly.

Ayeon’s smile simmered, “Yeah…feels like forever.”

“Oh, hon, I’m sorry. I need to apologize.” She said gently, “I’ve been an awful friend.”

Ayeon’s eyes widened, “Wait what? What are you talking about? No, you haven’t!”

“But I have, I’m been so…judge-y about J