The next week felt lonely.

But that didn’t stop me from wanting to deal with the situation myself. I gave my letter to Ryeowook the very next day and he sent it out to Kikwang. I went into the city to visit it one last time and visited my mother as much as possible. However, I wasn’t allowed to go out at all because the king wanted me to be healthy and strong before my trip to the fire kingdom.

My lessons seemed less interesting than before, maybe because I lost the excitement to learn about the kingdom, now that I know that I’m being sent away. I wondered if this was how Kikwang felt when he had to learn about the Earth Kingdom.

Maybe it won’t be so bad, I thought to myself. Kikwang seemed to be enjoying himself, maybe I will. But then again, he’s been to the Earth Kingdom and the Earth Kingdom isn’t our rival.

My mother sent several different herbs and medicines to the palace to pack for the trip. She even gave me several large bundles of yarn to take with me on my last visit with her. “Remember, not to forget that I love you.” She said, caressing my hair.

“I know.” I told her.

Her eyes glistened as she fought her tears, “Ii won’t be able to see you leave.” She said. “I know. And it’s okay. I know you want to be there.” I assured her. After my father married Queen Jang, my mother was banned from the palace and Queen Jang wasn’t going to make any exceptions. “You’ll do great.” She whispered. “I know you will.” A stray tear betrayed her.

“I don’t know why I’m crying. I should be proud; my son is going to be a consort.” She quickly wiped her stray tears away. “What??”

“What? Aren’t you going to be marrying the crowned prince?” She said. “I-I don’t know. Nothing has been set.” I said, somewhat flushed by her statement. “That’s what they’re going to do. Any smart king would do that.” She said, gently caressing my cheek. “Even if they do, I may not-,” “Yes you will. You will live Youngjae. Remember what I told you? Be kind and do right, be full of joy and gratitude and you will live. Those are your greatest strengths.” She urged. I didn’t say anything.

“Okay?” She said.

“Okay.” I responded.

“No Youngjae. You must promise me. Promise me you’ll do those things and fight to live. Do it for me. Do it for Kikwang. Do it for your siblings. Do it for Ms. Lee. Ms. Lee didn’t fight Queen Jang just to have you give up, right?” She said.

I let out a tiny smile, knowing exactly what she was talking about. “No, she fought for you and Kikwang to have good lives. So, you better make her blood, sweat, and tears worthwhile. Promise?”

“Promise.”

“Good.” She smiled softly. “I’ll visit you as soon as I can.” She promised. She reached and kissed the top of my forehead. “Be sure to write me.” She said. “I will.” I promised. “Good, and remember you were meant for this.” She encouraged. She then gave me one last hug before I left. “I love you so much.” She breathed. “I love you too Umma.”

I had more daily checkups than usual and washed frequently. I was given foods that would help strengthen me, so I wasn’t allowed any sweet desserts. As the week went by my room became emptier and emptier, until it was only my bed and dresser left, along with a couple of outfits for my last days here. With each item that left my room, I forced myself to become a little more distant from the snow kingdom.

Though YeEun and Hyungseung said that I would always be welcomed back. I didn’t know when I’d be back or even if I’ll ever come back. I wanted to distance myself, so it would hurt less when I leave and I won’t have to miss it so much when I was gone. Of course, it still hurt, it was my way of dealing with it the best I could.

I didn’t go out to see Daehyun at night either. In fact. I didn’t see him at all. I should’ve been glad because that was what I wanted, but my mind couldn’t help but still wander for him at night in my sleep.

As the week came to an end I frequently checked to see if Kikwang wrote me back, though I knew they were strained attempts because my letter won’t even reach him until after I left. But I still hoped anyway.

“Youngjae!” Hyungseung called me as I roamed the halls on my last day. I had been free from lessons today, so I could prepare for my trip in the morning. I turned to see that the crowned prince was standing on the other side of the hallway. “Come.” He said, waving me to him with urgency.

I did as he said and quickly walked to him. “What’s wrong?” I asked. However, he responded with a grin. “Somebody told me that you wanted to see the town beyond the city.” He said. I nodded hesitantly, unsure of how he found out. “Well, that wish of yours is going to come true. But we have to hurry. YeEun is in the back waiting for us right now.” He said.

My eyes slightly widened, “But I’m not supposed to go out. Did father say I could?”

“No, but we’re going anyway.”

“But-,”

“Youngjae, I know you’ve been sneaking out all week.” He said. My cheeks burned in embarrassment from being caught. “Does anyone else know?” I whispered. “No. Just YeEun and I. Come on, let’s go.” He said, leading the way.

To my surprise, YeEun was by the stables with three horses ready to go. “Ready?” Hyungseung asked, the 16-year-old. “You bet. But we need to hurry up before the stable boy comes back and catches us.” She said, climbing on her horse. Hyungseung helped me up my horse before climbing onto his. “Come on.” He said, after we flipped on our hoods.

We followed him out the back gate of the palace and made our way to the city, careful to not get caught. It was actually quite exciting, sneaking out like this. I’ve done it before with Kikwang and only recently on my own, but I’ve never done anything like this with Hyungseung and YeEun, so it was a new and exciting experience.

Once we were far from the palace, YeEun asked me questions about my lessons since she wasn’t allowed to attend them with me this week. Hyungseung listened as well. He even told me some stuff that he had learned and found from his own studies. He even gave me some advice.

Though, I couldn’t say a proper farewell to Kikwang I was grateful to at least spend this time with YeEun and Hyungseung.

I was unable to contain my excitement when we were finally out he city. It was more exciting, now that I wasn’t alone and didn’t’ have to worry about any outcasts. However, Hyungseung left his sword accessible on his hip and kept a keen eye out.

It was more of a quiet ride as we enjoyed the stillness and serenity of the land furthest away from our world. We traveled further than I did last time I came. Hyunseung and YeEun had been out here a few times, so they knew where they were going and where everything was.

The further out we went, the more things we saw. There were a lot more trees and a ton of winter flowers. “Wow~!” I said in awe, eyeing the beautiful flowers. “I’ve only seen them in books and paint