34 The Path Ahead

TW: Some depiction of violence towards the last part.

The Path Ahead

The cold breeze of winter is still making itself known, mayhap the coldest it has been. The sun has risen and everything insight had a tinge of blue. From up to where she is everything is so sterile, cold and… distant… far. She look in between her fingers that is on the railings, as if trying to reach what is far – what is ahead – the future and whatever lies between that and today.

Today… Today is the start of another journey and yet Chaewon does not know if she want to take that path.

“You’re here to?”

She’s not alone on that.

“You don’t seem cold at all.” The timid intruder of her space uttered.

In any other day, Chaewon is the intruder. Today it is the younger. “I thought you always think I’m cold.” She raises her eyebrow.

“Personality? No. no. no. I mean cold.” Yujin hug herself and pretend to shiver. “After all it’s still snowing.” She pointed up to the sky.

Chaewon chuckled; she didn’t notice the seemingly fluffy ice crystals are raining down on her. She tucked her hands inside the pockets of her padded jacket and blew air that turned to mist. “This thing is effective.”

“Warm and cozy.” Yujin added, despite feeling the breeze herself.

Both are lying, underneath that jacket they are shivering– yet the unexpected company of the other makes had invited a familiar warmth.

They look far ahead, to the city from the rooftop that has become their refuge.

Yujin kicked a can left on the ground, hitting a wall. “Beer?”

“Eunbi-unnie will be angry if she saw that.”

“Is not it too early?” The younger asked – together with a silent “is this legal?”

“I need… to clear my head.” Chaewon motioned. She picked up the can and the few more she had consumed.

“She will be angry.”

“I know.” Chaewon took a deep breath and pursed her lips, “I know.”

“But I need it… today.”

The younger cinched her eyes, confused and worried. There are many questions in her head – but she does not know which one to ask or to ask it at all.

“Hye..unnie will be angry at me, right?” she rolled an unopened can of beer to her palm. “But she’s the heaviest drinker among us.” She giggled at the contradiction before letting another bout of silence fill the air. She opened the can and took a gulp before letting out a chuckle “drinking around a minor is something she would frown upon – but I don’t know what to do anymore.”

She looked far away, pinned her eyes to the city, to the gray sky and the paths ahead of her. Her eyes are watering, much like a melting ice trying to maintain its form. The arrival of an unintended company had signaled her emotion to start flooding. There is a desire to confess all these vulnerabilities and uncertainties deep within her.

Yet there is a part that doesn’t want that to happen. Trying to prevent it to continue because it is unfair. This burden is something she cannot confide – to one who, at most is a far observer of her story, someone too young to see the doubts of someone threading the next steps of her journey.

“Unnie…”

Before Chaewon knew it – tears are rolling down her checks. A melting ice out in the heat of the sun.

“hahaha, I’m sorry.” She laugh awkwardly. “it’s just… a don’t mind me.”

“You know the rooftop had become our safe place.” She motioned.

“Unnie, You’re not really ok.”

“That’s something obvious, isn’t it?” Chaewon cackled leaving the younger quite confuse but that also put her at ease.

Right in front of Yujin, is Chaewon that she barely recognize. She knew it’s her Chaewon-unnie, the ice princess. One who would mimic that cat meme that says “ I had fun once – it’s horrible”.

None of the fortress that she built around her heart remains. Yujin can see that the one she is talking to is the kid hiding behind it. Yujin can see that-- and the one hiding inside that castle. The one who she never thought she would see. A vulnerable, doubting and unsteady, Chaewon.

Yujin might have learned a lot about comforting others in these past few months. It is still hard for her to understand reasons, the whys. Things that are beyond a broken heart – the doubts of the future are still beyond her.

Yet she still wanted to extend her hands in hopes that maybe it could help.

“A. unn..” She muttered but before she could finish her words, the older interrupted.

“I look silly, ain’t I? Leave the cans – I’ll throw them myself.” Chaewon proceeds to pick up the cans and threw them at bin situated at the corner of the rooftop – trying to gauge internally if she will be back tonight to throw the content herself.

Chaewon knew well that Yujin is awkwardly waiting for her to turn around. She found it funny how she left the younger hanging. Yujin is quite innocent in her eyes, someone who is pure and bright eyed.

“So what brings you here?”

“Me?”

“Yeah you, who else? no one else is here – unless you count that magpie over there or there is a ghost that I don’t know is around.” The older shrugs. She figures that aside from the same brand of padded coat they are wearing that they share same sentiment in regards to one thing.

“I need air.”

“At this cold?”

“space too… um I think.”

“What is our jinnie’s concern? Shouldn’t you be preparing for your graduation tomorrow?”

“well – ill check in at school later, its just... um like you I.I.. um need … this.” Yujin open her arms wide to emphasize the space she needed. “my head hurts.”

“this” Chaewon poked the younger girl’s forehead, “or this?”

Yujin felt the sharp stab square to her chest bone. It’s a fair question, nonetheless.

What really hurts, is it her head or her heart? For Yujin its, “A little of both.”

Yujin dig her hands in her hair, “Decisions.”

“About your future?” Chaewon asked and the younger nodded. “So we really are here for the same thing.”

The younger opened and closed . Her eyes are questioning.

Chaewon cleared , “I mean we are both graduating, you tomorrow and me, next week”, She pressed her back to the railings watching her breathe condensate. “If I’m questioning myself about the path I want to take, you might as well too. I’m just connecting things – though I don’t know what a middle schooler concerns are like. I forgot about what it was like. ”

Even though she had been there before, circumstances of those days are so out of what an ordinary 16 year old would experience.

“Ah, unnie are you?” Yujin protest in fake disgust, “Middle schoolers have concerns about their future too. Have you seen the statistics?”

“Statistics? You doing math now?”

“I’m not that bad at it, Nako-unnie been helping me a lot and Hii unnie is kinda scary. I’m better at it now.” She pouted.

Chaewon chuckled. Middle schoolers do indeed have concerns beyond Math grade. In a hyper competitive society like theirs even a graduating middle schooler would spend nights questioning the path laid ahead of them. Some more so than others, Yujin is no exception.

“It’s not really that I had hard time making decision, because I have already decided, but it’s like-” The younger look down at the snow settling down her toes.

Now that Chaewon think of it maybe it was that, she already know what she wanted to do.

“I just want to make sure I’m making the right one, because - ”, the younger ruffled her own hair once again. “a..a part of me is telling me, I’m being stupid. That it is not right. There is a part of me asking me to think about it more.”

“But that won’t change what you want to do.”

The younger diligently nodded.

“I can sort of understand that.” In all her 18 and half years of life Chaewon never thought, she’ll get enlightenment from unsteady footed about to graduate middle schooler.

To be fair, Chaewon never consider herself authority to any life changing advice. Not when she spent most of her time debating what shoes to wear, the state of her makeup, matching up her outfit and trying to decide if it is a good day to go outside like most of her age.

She look at Yujin who is wrestling the doubt out of her mind, trying and slowly winning.

Her reddening face worry Chaewon, it is cold and she did not even have a head covering let alone a scarf.

Chaewon took off her bonnet and placed it on the younger girl’s head. With how much taller the younger is-- she needed to tiptoe to place it properly.

Yujin smiled bashfully, “That’s something Hyewon unnie would do but not you.” She teased.

Chewon chuckled, “ahhahah I guess this is something she would do too.” She patted the taller, amused at her resemblance to that of a puppy.

“Are you worried about her?” the younger inquired.

“Hmmm, very much. I’m worried, maybe a little hurt, confuse. But mostly its worry, I worry about her a lot, it is making me uneasy – that I can’t do anything.”

“Hyewon-unnie is strong and I think if it’s something important she would tell it to you.”

“ah.” Chaewon tried to stifle her laughter, “that’s a bit … how I should I say it… “ – naïve is the word she was looking for. She’s not that far from Yujin, she know herself that she too is naïve. She wants to keep the younger that way for a little longer.

Yujin pouted.

“Cute.” She muttered, “Nevermind what I was trying to say I forgot what it was. Honestly it’s not about unnie why I am here and you made me realize that.”

Yujin tilted her head, confuse as to what the older was trying to say. Chaewon could not help but gush at how cute, Yujin is. On occasion, the younger look mature, but today she is like a big Labrador, that she just wanted to hug and pamper.

“What I want to say is - I’m here because of me. It is for myself and the things I need to do.” Chaewon pointed to herself with air of lightness in her voice that made Yujin happy.

“And you?” Chaewon pointed to the younger, “What is this decision you are speaking of that you are trying to convince yourself that it is not a bad idea?”

“I want - no I will stay here in Seoul.” Yujin declared, “My parents are not very sure of that.” She laugh.

Chaewon can see the fire sparkling in Yujin’s eyes. It is full of hope and none of the doubts. Her desire to stay is unquestionable and Chaewon thinks that the problem might be a matter of logistics.

Of how?

“Have you ask your parents?”

“Well…I – I did.” The younger stuttered. “Don’t get me wrong I did ask them and told them my preferred school but they are not entirely convinced – they want me to go back to Daejeon.”

“What did you say?”

“I kind of convince them for now, atleast until unnie still can vouch for me and the school gives me good chance to a university – if I study hard enough.” The younger look down to her shoes before looking back to the older.

“unnie? Yena-unnie?”

“Yeah, Yena-unnie and Min-”

“Minjoo?”

Yujin nodded, “I mean she reports to my parents and she’s going to be my schoolmate.”

“Oh yeah I almost forgot. You are going to attend our school, speaking of which are the two of you still not on talking terms? Is she angry? Is she even capable of that?” Chaewon wonders but then she remembers that incident from last year and it made her giggle, “now that I think of it well – she sometimes can. Either way you should sort it out. What’s the problem, really?”

“It’s not that she’s angry at me, It’s just- awkward. I can’t face her after that…”

“After your confession?” Chaewon jabbed.

“ahhh!” The younger buried her face to her palm. It is tomato red not from cold but from embarrassment. “It’s embarrassing.”

Chaewon can’t help but chuckle.

“How would I face her?” Yujin groaned, “I made a fool out of myself back then. I’m stupid, I made it awkward for them. ”

“To Hii-chan and Minjoo? I think they are just waiting for you, I can feel that. ”

Chaewon recalled that incident again last year – thinking to herself that rejection do make one tentative but over thinking potential reaction can lead to miscommunication and she had a lot of those and she can say to herself that it is worst.

She scratched her nape, feeling the cold wind- she looked at Yujin’s eyes intently, “Do you still feel something for Min?”

Yujin had not shaken her head as hard as she did, minus that time they tried hairography for laughs. Chaewon would’ve burst of laughter if only it was not insulting to do so at this time. She thinks Yujin looks like a wet puppy trying to expel water out of its fur.

The younger cross her arm, “I don’t, not in that way anymore. It’s …. A little crush.“

The kid blush once again admitting that her little crush remains.

Chaewon giggled, “A little? I feel like you’re stumble again and again.”

“I’m not letting that happen.” Yujin pouted. “Beside I don’t wanna get killed by a mochi turned human.”

“I’m going to tell her you said that.” The older let her laughter fill the air, while Yujin shivers at the possibility of being hunted down by a cute bread-loving prankster.

“Don’t worry about it much. Go ahead and talk to Min, I know for one that she’s waiting for you to talk to her again as for Hitomi – if she is helping you with your assignments then I don’t think she carries any I’ll will against you. That kid has her evil streak, but otherwise I think she really cares for people especially one that the person she love values.“ Chaewon grinned before catching herself saying the word, “That kid…” She gasp in horror, “I think I’ve been hanging out with Gran and Eunbi Unnie a lot these days.”

Yujin laugh alongside the older, the short-shared moment have warmed her heart. Chaewon is an unexpected mentor, but she’ll take that and this fleeting moment under the falling snow to her memories.

“How ‘bout unnie, what uni you’ll attend. I have not heard about it from anyone including Hye-unnie. I’ve heard you got accepted to Yonsei right? That’s amazing.”

Chaewon before taking a deep breathe, “I’m taking a gap year.”

Yujin furrowed her eyebrows and tilted her head, she was about to ask why but the older beat her to it,

“It’s popular nowadays for those who can afford. Take a year off – travel somewhere, get some work maybe, a year to find oneself.”

“Does unnie, don’t know what she want to do?”

Chaewon huff a smile, “You actually made me realize what I want to do.”

“Ehh…” Yujin spat.

Chaewon chuckled, “You’re are sounding like them.” She took a deep breathe, “what I mean is that you made me realized that all this mulling I’m doing is…. Sort of… meaningless. That deep inside – I know what I want to do. Today and ------ forward.”

She gulped, looking up to the confuse eyes of the younger. All this while she know what she wanted to do and all the alcohol was to convince herself otherwise. Alas – things made her realize there are times you just jump down that cliff hoping you land in a bridge made of cotton.

She huff out air and watch it become mist for a moment. “You should go now and talk to them, settle this out. That’s what you want to do afterall.”

“Unnie, you are scaring me. You sounded like grandma.” The younger pretended to be scared.

“Ahahah yeah. I do. So go ahead now –seized the day. Do as I say.”

“Aye aye. Grand ma.” The younger bowed then saluted.

“This bastard!” Chaewon pretended to hit Yujin who pulled her tongue out before bolting to the door.

“YUJIN!!” Chaewon called her back.

“WHAT IS IT GRANDMA!!”

“THANK YOU!”

“For?” Yujin felt a hailstorm rushing down her heart.

There is some kind of fear that suddenly engulf her after she heard the older’s voice. Even if the distance between them is short, a mere, 3 and half or so meters, she can see Chaewon’s eyes. They are on fire, determination, a feeling of reckless abandonment that Yujin can feel but cannot explain. That scares her.

Chaewon smiled, relieved but there’s a glint of fear that peaked out from her eyes. “Good luck, Yujin, thank you and see you.”

Yujin was about to speak her thoughts. That even if she has no idea what it is – she want to convince the older to think otherwise. She that Chaewon is going to do something that she might regret. She can’t rationalize why.

Yujin asked herself. Why on earth is her alarm whistling? But before she could holler it out, Chaewon had manage to wisk her away.

In a blink of an eye she’s standing a few steps away from the door of Room 303. She could hear the laughter coming out from inside of it.

She took a deep breath and huff. She pulled her phone out of the chest pocket of her padded coat and dialed a familiar name.

HYEWON.

“Yujin-ah~~”

“Unnie. “

“What’s wrong? Ah wait a second let me park my car. “

“Unnie…”

“Ok so what’s wrong? You sound distraught.”

“Chaewon-unnie. She’s talking about something I don’t quite understand, I’m worried. She’s thanking me earlier for something and she’s drunk. I don’t know what is going on in her head.”

Hyewon breathes.

“Hmmm. She had drinks?”

“A lot.”

“You saw? I’ll scold her about that. In the meantime don’t worry about her. I’ll trust her. She’s not gonna do anything dumb. “

“Unnie, I’m worried. I have a feeling she’s … going to do something she’ll regret.“

Yujin had now figured out what Chaewon’s eyes reminds her off. Hers.

It was the same as hers when she stupidly confess but a bit more sure and resigned.

Yujin was hanged up in thought, if Chaewon’s action doesn’t make sense to her so are Hyewon’s words. She barely have time to process the words she’s hearing. She’s worried at the same time she just can’t wrap her young brain into this situation.

The door of Room 303 flew open.

“Oh Yujin? What brings you here? Is there a problem. Aunty will arrive later today right? Do you need help?” Minjoo blurted.

Yujin shook her head.

“Jinnie what brings you here?” A cute voice uttered, Hitomi snake her arms on Minjoo’s waist and gently tried to place her chin on the taller girl’s shoulder.

It was cute. Yujin is not gonna lie, she’s jealous. Don’t get her wrong she also want to be back hug and also yes she’s highkey jealous of Hitomi getting the permission to do so.

HItomi tightened her hold and raise the pitch of her voice. “You sure you don’t want me to go with you?” She whispered with a glint of mischievousness in her eyes.

Yujin is pacing herself – she knew that older is purposely making it extra – to off.

That little demon bread. She whispered.

For honesty’s sake she want to yanked Hitomi out of Minjoo’s back. One because she’s green eyed and two between Hitomi acting like a strawberry jam made of 10kilos of sugar and Minjoo visibly melting at her girlfriends antic, there’s just too much cringe for her to take.

“OH MY GOD PLEASE RESPECT THE SINGLES OF THE WORLD!!!” a familiar voice boomed.

Nako come in huffing looking visibly spent and not as energetic as Yujin is used to.

“It’s pretty cold you know, im taking advantage of extra heat source.” Hitomi declared.

MInjoo chuckled, “I’m heading out, don’t pout . You still need to do something right?” She pointed to Yuri’s direction who’s a half asleep mess trying to piece out what looks like a decorative board.

Hitomi let go and sighed, she look down on her foot and coyly look back to Minjoo. The older couldn’t help but give her a forehead kiss.

*brwahh* Yujin who pretended to retch.

Hitomi was about to retort back when a sleep deprived Nako suddenly speak up in rather monotonous tone, “Yah. Jinnie what the.” She glared , “You went out in the snow again. I told you to not do that. If you feel sick go get a rest, the scary duck will get angry at me if you get sick. Beside it’s your graduation tomorrow you don’t wanna be sick for that.” She huffed, “Honestly Yena-unnie is more like a Canadian Goose lately.”

Yujin stared at Nako with brows furrowed. Studying the rambling of the smaller girl. Minjoo who was about to go down but stop and stared at Nako too.

“Somethings off.” Hitomi muttered.

Yujin lightly touch Nako’s forehead. Her eyes bulge out of her socket, “ What the ducks you are burning!”

“Language!” Nako hissed, “Get your hands off of me!”

Yujin was a bit shock but got her footing fast, “This penguin.” Yujin huff and grabbed Nako’s face pulling her up close to her. “You’re the one telling me to be careful yet look who is sick right now?”

Nako’s face was visibly red and she look back at the taller as if she forgets air exist. Before she knew it she flew up in the air and found herself up at the younger girl shoulder.

“You look like a potato bag.” Hitomi teased.

“I.I think you should not carry her like that.” Minjoo spluttered.

“She’s fine with that.” Yujin look back at Minjoo who is following closely behind her as she went down the stair.

“who is fine with!?” Nako tried to free herself and Yujin shushed her up. “Let me back down, Im fine.”

“Wait for me!” Hitomi shouted few steps out of the room but a cold ghost like hand grab her before she could sprint out.

“Where are you going!?”

“Yahhh! Yul.!?” She gasped, “You scared me.”

“Don’t escape.”

“But Nako.”

Yuri stared back at Hitomi with bloodshot eye, who despite her protest gave up following the others and went back inside.

Time moves forward like it always does and with time and open-heart wounds start to mend.

•••♦♦♦•••♦♦♦•••

Hyewon pulled up on the side of the road once again.

She sighed.

She looks back and forth between the phone in her hand and the road ahead of her, her thumb is hovering around the call button.

Despite all the thing she said to Yujin about Chaewon and how well she mask her inner turmoil. Nothing can change the truth – that she is worried. So worried and distraught yet can’t barely decide what to do.

Things has change, as the second hand of the clock complete another revolution, their relationship too has turned upside down and up again but not quite the same as before.

She took another deep breath. She fought back her reasoning and gave up to her worries.

“Hello.”

That hello is as cold as the winter wind blistering outside her car.

“What are you up to?” She tried to mask the concern behind her voice.

“I wont tell you. I don’t need to.”

Hyewon felt like a whole bucket of ice water was dump over her head. Secrets was not a thing between them before, but it is now.

“Are you still - ” Hyewon tried to ask.

“No. We are quits. It’s – there are things I need to handle myself.”

“Im. Chaewonie… whatever it is you are planning. Don’t. ” Hyewon sense that her initial guess was wrong. Chaewon was indeed jumping straight to something that might harm her, it drives her head to sound the alarm. “Don’t do it, please. I’m beg-”

She heard the girl on the other end sighed, “I can’t back down now. I’m sorry. This is something that is important to me.” She heard her gulp, “Something that doesn’t concern you. It’s for me and myself alone.”

“I-“

“Do you trust me?” Chaewon asked and Hyewon went silent.

“Do you?” She asked again.

Hyewon found her voice, “Yes, at the same time I’m... I’m worried.”

Hyewon heard another sigh, “Don’t be -- I’ll be back.”

That was not very reassuring and it made her more worried, she tried to speak again but the gets cut off before she could.

Hyewon slumped back - covering her eyes with her forearm in disbelief. A lot of things have pop up in her head to remedy it. She knew though that if she made a move – it my spell the end for them. She’s hanging her faith in the tiny thread of trust that still exist between them because like Chaewon she still has things to sort out for herself as well.

Her phone rang. Her stomach almost turn upside down – it’s a number she dreaded to see and was hoping to never get a call from. She took one deep breath and fix herself, wipe the trail of tears that she didn’t notice flowed down her cheeks. Look and mirror and fix her makeup trying to look as professional as someone her age can be. She answered the call confirming her destination.

Bracing for the last stretch of her journey, she steps on the gas pedal and let the car roll forward. Forward to a path that goes back. She’s trying to swim upwards while subsequently getting pulled down.

•••♦♦♦•••♦♦♦•••

Chaewon read her call log. She has her eyes fixated to Hyewon’s brief call. Her face is painted with an undecipherable smile, not quite happy and not quite sad. Maybe a bit relieved. She scrolled back up to the latest call. A number without name.

She has never felt so sure in her life. She knows what she must do. She needed to act, as stupid as this going to be.

She walked up a rundown road towards a crumbling house. It was more a shack rather than any dwelling that serve as primary residence. She remembers it from before it was supposed to be replaced by a villa years ago.

She knew she was born out of secrets. Most of what she knew about herself are lies. There is no Chaewon she could look back to, to say that’s me. Those are illusion – her entire being is an illusion to appear to decency. She’ll end all of that today and build a new one.

She couldn’t hear anything other than the sound of the metal bat being drag along the dirt hitting rocks on its way. She walked heavy footed ‘till she stops at front of a chained up door. She put down her padded coat before smashing down the lock. She let the sound rang out before carefully setting her foot inside. Cold be damned.

“Chaewonie!” A man groveling down spoke. Bottles of beer rolling around, empty packs of cigarettes littered.

Chaewon had very much expected this. She had this person trap into the very building he owns. One of the last one that has not been taken by the banks. She had asked the men he contracted to do this and to leave before she had arrived. They promised this man that she will arrive today.

“My child. I’m happy you look for me. I knew you wouldn’t let me starve.” The man run to her but before he could hug her, he hit the space between them drawing a line.

She pointed the bat to him and ordered him to sit. “You have no child to speak off.”

What’s filial piety? Chaewon thrashed the makeshift table near her to pieces. Not sparing even the bottles around it – letting shards of them hit her delicate hand.

The man tried to tackle her, she waved the bat and cornered him. He put his hands up, “Chaewon what is happening to you? Is this how you will return…”

“Return what!?” Chaewon push the bat to his throat. “Everytime you called me you are asking for money. You’re practically hiding. You are a what now? A disgusting gambling addict.” Chaewon huffed. “You think I will fall for your words. I wont! all you do is lie!”

“Lo-look w-we can build back our relationship. We only have each other. You can turn over the world, but my blood is still what’s flows inside you. W-we can go back t-to being good father and daughter.”

“Lies. We don’t have much of a relationship to speak off.” She glared.

The man snickered. “Look here child.” His patience seemingly run out.

He walks closer to Chaewon. “I’m trying to talk to you nicely and this how you pay it back.” He brushed his chin, “I want to remind you that I am still your father and I’m still far stronger that you’ll ever be.”

Chaewon swung the bat close to his face. “But I’m the one who have weapon, and I’m not going to hesitate in using it.”

“We are no different.” The man muttered.

“No. We ARE different!”

In Chaewon’s mind it’s all or nothing. She needs something, she needs this one thing settled. There is no logical reason to put herself in this much harm but she did, only for the purpose of being satisfied.

She wants to shatter her past in literal ways, short of putting blood on her hands or maybe even to that point. The fire in her heart has grown larger and larger and every second its starting to consume every fiber of her being.

She swung as he swung back in return but there is something about swinging without a fear of dying.

One hit to the legs, two to the torso, a kick to the stomach, another swing at the left shoulder and one more at the back. These are all strength she never actually had but somehow getting. For each hit the shackle at her feet are breaking – she’s starting to feel free. The Chaewon of the past is starting to shatter down to pieces.

His father fell down to the floor with blood dripping down his face. He saw a knife and in desperation tried to grab it, but Chaewon is quicker. She stepped on it and quickly kick it away.

“You never once cared for me.” She steps close to him, as he was trying to get away by crawling backwards until his back hit the wall. Fear is slowly creeping in.

“I could have very well end you. I have means.” Chaewon muttered.

Seeing a chance, the man tried to stand but Chaewon put him back down. There is no way in hell this is feasible. That his own daughter sheer will is overpowering him.

The fire in Chaewon’s heart is slowly calming down. Logic and reason is slowly going back. She still won’t let go of her old man from the corner she boxed him in.

“I could but I could also spare your life.”

“Ha. How would you!?”

“Shut up!” She put her foot down firmly on the mans injured shoulder. He writhed in pain. “I might be dumb, but I did cover my back.”

Chaewon knew the guards she asked to leave will be back soon. She timed things the best she could.

“I’ll spare you if you do something for me.”

Chaewon heard the familiar chattering and is confident she will be safe. She let go of the man’s shoulder. Her eyes filled with disgust as well as growing confidence her plans are coming to fruition.

“You really think you can get away with this?” The man questioned.

“I can.”

“Ha. You hate me so much but look at you now. I am right we are the same.” He spat.

“Maybe.” Her father’s eyes widen.

The sound of more footsteps come closer.

“Finally.” Chaewon turn around and she was acknowledged by a woman with short hair. While the men in padded coats over their suit stood in attention behind her and some surrounded her father.

“You and Hyewon have penchant for getting yourselves in trouble.”

Chaewon snickered, “Thank you for not letting her know.”

The older woman smiled, she signaled to man behind her who Chaewon is quite familiar with. The man obliged and handed Chaewon a folder.

“Thank you, Mister Han.”

She quickly went back the older woman’s side who motioned to his father, “Mr. Kim do you want to take a seat.”

The older woman then look at Chaewon, “Are you satisfied?”

For a moment the younger look at her father being helped up by the bodyguards to sit down on a chair.

Chaewon breath a sigh of relief. She nodded. “Yeah.”

Violence is not the answer, they say, but it is for her today.

Time has finally moved again for her. She felt agency, a control over her life.

The high of her anger, the adrenaline is starting to wear off. The hits she brushed off, the pain of her legs, the wounds from shards of glasses are all starting to ache.

Despite all of this she felt that she can now take a step forward and rebuild herself on her own terms.

Note:

I'm very sorry it took more than a year to update [1 1/2].
Lots has happened to the world, to my fav group and to myself.
I will try to finish it - the narative has been laid down its up to me to write the chapters.
This chapter took several revision and almost this version took 6 months. The words just stop flowing from my fingers and writing is not coming the way it used to me.
I would appreciate your comment if you are still reading it.

Story Note:

The last one chapter 33 are about roads people can take.
This one is about starts of journeys on those path and sometimes it can be unnerving, exciting, messy and sometimes what feels like foreward is backward [hyewon].
This story after all was built aroudn 2won. I think that them in the story will look back to this and shake their head at how stupid it is.
Yes its kinda makjang chaebol action drama. hahhaha.
I hope you enjoy Yujin. Yujin is still that fun kid and also the leader. Like she is now in Ive. She really has come to her own as a person.