"Ri.. hold on there. Please. Don't make hyung feel stupid like this." Jiyong hugged Seungri on the way to hospital.

Upon arriving, Jiyong and Youngbae rushed to the ER and hand Seungri to the nurses there. They saw doctors busy checking and even do CPR on Seungri. But its a failed. Soon the doctor turn on defibrillator and put voltage and shocked Ri. The first and second try were really wasteful. Luckily, the third try the heart rate machine shows a good sign. Again the inturbate Seungri for better breathing access. After 30 minutes, the doctor come out.

"How's my dongsaeng doc?" Youngbae asked

"Did your brother just discharge from here?"

"Yes he is. Last 2 days" Seunghyun answered

"Luckily you guys bring him early. He just overdosed sleeping pills that made him collapsed. I just wonder did you guys having fight with your brother? From what I experienced through his facial expression he's so sad."

"Erm.. actually he just misheard about some problems that makes he keep away himself in his room. and we found out just now. He already collapsed and his mouth foaming." Jiyong replied

"I see. Since he's still kids, I worried if all those suicide idea might harm him. So please don't let the problems trouble up him."

"Ah, ne. Can we see him?"

"Yes, of course you may"

3 of them walked in the room and see Seungri sleeping very deep. According to the doctor just now, Seungri will wake up tomorrow morning. Youngbae and Seunghyun then leave Jiyong to take care of Seungri because they're working tomorrow.

Arrived home, Youngbae entered the room and clean the mess that Seungri left. He collect the leftover pills that nearly take Seungri's life and throw it away. While cleaning the bed, Youngbae found The Panda Diary belongs to his maknae. At first he hesitate whether to read it or not but somehow his feeling telling him to read to. There might be anything that related to maknae. He then slowly sit on the bed and pick up the diary

13th December
Ri so happy today. Finally Ri can go home,hyung said Ri have been sleeping for a long time. But, Ri don't remember about that. Hmm, its okay. As long as Ri can see hyung happy. Ri already healthy now.

Tears started threating to fall down from Youngbae eyes

Eomma, Ri missed eomma so much. Thank you for visiting Ri while Ri is sleeping. Eomma, Ri is wearing glasses now because hyung said due to injury from the past event Ri having myopia. Ri not very comfortable wearing it but Ri will try to gwt together with it soon. And even Ri can't celebrate birthday this year, its okay. Hyungie have bring Ri to the theme park. Ri so happy.

'So Ri meet Eomma while he's in coma?' Youngbae thought and tears already found the way and started to escape now. He flipped another page

14th December 
Wae? Wae? Just why must be Ri? Ri is a burden right? Forever a burden to hyung. First, Ri is mute. Second, cancer and then Ri got kidnapped until Ri end up hospitalized for months and now? Blind? There's millions people in this world why must be Ri? Ri will be forever burden to hyung. Ri don't blame hyung for lying but hyungie must feel burdened for having Ri right? 🙏😢 Mianhae hyung Ri can't be the good dongsaeng for hyung. 

"Why Ri? You never a burden to hyung. No need to self harming and even trying to suicide.. We all love you." Youngbae cried hugging the diary. That night he read everything that Seungri wrote from A to Z. Youngbae started to notice and realized that, at one certain moment they, Seunghyun hyung, Jiyong and himself really ignoring Seungri. At those moments, is where Seungri was diagnosed as a cancer patient 

15th June 
Is it that hurt having cancer Eomma? Hyung, how does it feels actually? No wonder few weeks ago, Ri's leg were swelling and Ri easily get tired even walking from train station to home is really tiring. 😔☹️ Mianhae hyung, Ri can't tell the truth. It's not Ri intentionally lying but..☹️ Ri know hyungie are busy. Ri don't want to burdening hyung with these disease, hyungie already tired with works and studies. 

Tears flowing down non stop as Youngbae open the confirmation letter that Ri folded and inserted together in that page. Who knows the strongest hyung among Seungri's hyung could cry hard like this. Youngbae fall asleep with that diary while Seunghyun slept outside. 

Tomorrow morning, Youngbae went to the boutique with gloomy face. Taehyun that arranging the dress noticed Youngbae aren't like before when he stepped in the the boutique. He just walked straight away inside to the atelier at the second floor. Since Hyorin hasn't arrive yet, Taehyun just let Youngbae by himself. 5 minutes later, Hyorin arrived. 

"Hyorin-ah, d