Getting somewhere.

Lament
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Warning: Mention of ness below but no actual , and a little of words considered obscenity, please avoid if you don't like. Taeyeon's POV. ”Taeyeon please, don't be like this, don't push me away, I believe those unclear images had everything to do with you because ever since I met you I couldn't be myself, strangely everything concerning you felt familiar, and there was just something about you that made me curious and wanting to know more, I'd always known there was something missing in my life, the feeling was there always until I met you Taeyeon, I only felt completed when I met you, so please let's talk, let's really talk.” ”What do you want to talk about? I told you I don't know you, I don't see what you see, so what's there to talk about?” I asked coldly but instead of answering me, she moved closer to me and hugged me tightly. I was so surprised that my body went frozen in her arms. When I regained my sanity, I tried to push her away but she just tightened her embrace. ”No! Please don't push me away Tae. I've been wanting to hug you for long! I will not let you slip away from me!” She said sternly. I stopped pushing her away upon hearing her determined voice. She still felt the same, smelt the same. I didn't know what came over me as I felt my eyes welled with tears. “No. Don't say ridiculous things. I have already moved on! Please don't just come into my life and hurt me again!” I said and pushed her harder this time and she let me go. “Moved on? Did we really had something between us that I failed to remember? Are those images real?” She asked, she looked desperate, her eyes were reflecting something, was it hope? “Stop saying things you don't know about. okay, I had a girlfriend in my life,” i admitted. “She resembles you, she died three years ago, your similarities with her is the reason that makes me want you out of my life, you remind me of her and it hurts me to know she's never coming back to me, I want to forget her but with you here it will be hard, so hard, so please just go away, just leave me alone.” I snapped at her. “Do you love her this much, To be affected by her mere resemblant?” Jessica decided to be persistent. ”I do.” I admitted, I do not want to give outwrong ideas to her, at least if she knew I had someone in my heart, she wouldn't push too hard. ”Then can I be her substitute?” And damn she's pushing really hard. ”Can I fill in the space she left in your heart?” Is this girl out of her mind? ”What?” My body tensed. I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion and glanced at Jessica. ”I want to be.” Jessica said, moving closer to me, she slowly reached out her hand to move my bangs to the side, but I flinched away before she could touch me again. ”You're frivolous, do you know? What the hell are you talking about? Do you even know the impact of your words? What they mean?” “I want to be in your life...I know it's weird and sudden since we just met, I might even look creepy to you, but I'm falling for you.I know you're heartbroken and it's kinda complicated. But will you please let me into your....?” “Stop right there,” I interrupted. ”I don't know what you call yourself, is it Jessica or what ever you are, look! you might have certain similarities with my ex, but that doesn't mean I will fall into your arms, you're so despicable, do you hear your self? ain't you married already? Or you just want me to be your lesbian experiment, someone you can use and dump at will?” I asked anger burning thru me as I remembered my past with her. “God, Taeyeon how can you think like that? I said it's complicated, you won't understand but that marriage means nothing to me, I will be getting divorce anyways, so it really shouldn't matter much, and I have no plan on using you, if anything, I should be the one to be afraid of being used.” I scoffed finding my sit. “You're quite something else,” I smirked. “You're standing here trying to tell me that you've fallen for me? the person that you hardly know, someone you just met and what? You expect me to believe you?” “Taeyeon, I know is hard to believe but I love you, I can't deny that, the connection I feel with you can't be wrong, I love you and it feels like I've been loving you all my life, please just understand my struggles, let me in, I promise you that I'm not gonna hurt you.” She confessed, she crouched down in front of me and softly placed her hands on mine, gently prying them away, I looked up at her, tears once again forming. She tucked my bangs behind my ear and I let her this time, though I was speechless. I didn't know what to do or say. It was as if my mind just went blank at her confession. So all I could do was stare blankly at her, I wasn't even breathing anymore. 'Did she even know what she's saying?Being vulnerable to me ,a person who she'd hurt once, I would basically control and ruin her now, if I wanted to. How can Jessica hand over her vulnerability so easily? Isn't she afraid that I would avenge what she did to me in the past.' I wonder in disdain, but I realized she possibly doesn't remember all the heart break she had once put me through. “Why are you being foolish?” I asked avoiding her gaze by looking down at my trembling hands. “Because I love you Taeyeon, I strongly believe I once loved you, I still can feel it, how strong it was, how strong it is still.” There it is again, the words that weakens me every time it comes from , it weakens me then and it still does now. “You really don't know what you're saying, if you do, you wouldn't be here now.” I said, she stared at me and I stared back, open and closed again, obviously she got nothing to say now, while my eyes spoke for me. 'I don't want anything to do with you because, you once gave me a broken heart. A broken heart that couldn't be repaired, there are still remnants of the scar. A scar that'll never fade. Anything can fade but a broken heart never truly heals. Not with a never fading scar. I thought it had faded. After all these years. But, the second I saw those brown obs I loved so much, I felt the pang in my chest. Almost as if the scar was pulsating, trying to break open again.' I had wanted to add, but I couldn't. “Taeyeon, I'm not a little kid, I know what I want and I'm sure I know every word I'd spoken, so please just give me a chance, and I promise you that I can be her replacement, her substitute, even better than she had ever been.” She finally said, after thinking much for a while. I shook my head at her, she doesn't know what she's saying, obviously. “Just go home Jessica." I said tiredly, she just makes me so weak, and won't understand how scared I am right now, I didn't want to stay any longer, afraid that I will give in to her, so I stood quickly turning towards my room. I was abruptly stopped by her hands wrapping around my upper arm, yanking me back towards her. “What the fu...” I was silenced by her lips on mine. For a moment my guard was down, I almost kissed back. But, Jessica was rip
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Taengislove89
I hope to get more comments now, even though I didn't know what I was writing at some point, I just knew I needed to give you guys a happy ending.

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onesleven
#1
Chapter 6: I'm glad I found this story, I've been binge reading your story these days haha I miss TaengSic and I miss good story, yours is great one. Anyway, whatever happen to you in past, hopefully you all find your happiness now. Anyway, next! Haha
Winrina2020 #2
I will read this as soon as possible.
Griddlez #3
I love this story so much.
KTIYKY7921
#4
Chapter 6: Glad to get the chance to read such masterpieces from you author-nim!.. Wouldn't had found this if you didnt post it in your story 'The Contract Series'(The Arrange Marriage).. this story is really touching.. I have also encountered something like this in life too.. but it was more of a friendship instead Love surely has us trapped and hurting.. Thanks for this awesome story from you..
Aneesajeon22 #5
Chapter 6: Ah my heart. It couldn't take the angst. But glad they ended up where they are. Thanks for sharing.
LailaloveBts97 #6
I don't usually read taengsic but I make exceptions for your stories, because they're the best and I always enjoy how you wrote them.
Lalalandbts5 #7
Chapter 7: So glad that after all that heart break the two them got back together.
Nafisaddy88 #8
I will try this one. Sounds promising.
intisar99 #9
Looks interesting. I am gonna read this.
Yuskaiyim #10
I need more of taengsic. I really had a hard time reading this. It made me an emotional mess. But I really did enjoyed it so much.