After shopping for many books, I go to my orphanage with my best friend, Seunggi. He was the one that knows a real of me. 

"Looked at this building, it's better than when we're still here right?" he said made me smiled. Yeah, it's better.

"It's because of you.."

I am walking to children playing on the ground. They have a playground now. Silently, I moved my money to make all this happened. I have a little business that my parents don't know to helped other people who needs it. 

I always came here if I felt sad or missed me as Kim Ahyoung. 

"Yah, Yura!" Seunggi runs to me after brings the books inside. I glared at him.

"Don't call me by that name here,"

"Hhh.. what a fuse,"

I chuckle and go to the hills not far from there.

"Why you have to hide your charity here? Didn't everyone would be proud of you and praise you?" Asked him who following me in behind.

"I don't want they've used our orphanage for media,"

Seunggi linking his arm around my shoulder, "Don't worry, no one else who knows Kim Ahyoung,"

"Tsk."

"So, Jonghyun don't know about what Ahyoung-ie did?"

"Of course not. He hated me,"

"But you like him right?" 

I am flying my fist to his stomach, "watch your mouth!"

"Ah!" He laughs and pranks on me.

I am grateful to have him beside me. I can forget about who I am now for a moment.

"Seunggi-ya, you have to enter the same university as me! Promise?"

"Yeah, if you acted sweet to me!"

I smirk at him and chuckle. He smart and I believe he will enter it because of his brain.

******

"Looks out, you're pretty with this dress~"

I look myself in the mirror and put a little smile.

"Of course my daughter is the best," said my mom. 

"I happy, you choose me as your designer this year.," said Hwang J towards me. I can't hear anything he said, I am concerned about my nervous. I always panic if stand in front of media and many cameras who portrait me, their flash made my worries. 

"Whoa, you're so pretty, Yura.." 

Hong's family come and I bow a little to them. My eyes meet Jonghyun and I smiled to him, "Your suit is pretty,"

He isn't said anything and just looks at me uncomfortably. 

"In ten minutes, you all can enter the rooms and stand for a while for media then give a speech." Said the staff.

I can feel my heart beating getting fast, I am sweating and can't calm. 

"I will use the toilet for a moment,"

I am throw up into a closet and eat the pill to control my panic, I never forget how scary that flash on me and they shout my name in front of my face. I tried so hard handling this situation every year.

Knock. Knock. Knock!

"Yah, Kim Yura! Get fast!" A voiced of Jonghyun made me take a breath. I am going out like it's nothing happened.

"Why you always like this if we have to rush?" Said him resented.

I just smiled, "Let's go,"

"Tsk."

I am hidden my shaking legs. I following Jonghyun who enter the rooms after our parents. I am already feeling all the flash on us. I started dizzy and tried hard not to seems panic. My body is stiff as I control my mind and my breath. 

My father and Mr. Hong give a speech but I am not heard what they say. I tried to focus on myself. 

The staff gives us a sign after their speech to continued walking to the stage to blow the candle.

I turned my body but my legs don't work. They won't move. I saw Jonghyun's back that wants to step away and without thinking I grab his blazer, made him stop and turn at me.

I grab him tighter and look at his eyes for help. He staring at me a little longer then put his hand over my body then made me easier for walking. I can see his cool face from the side. Thanks to him. 

"Gomaweo.." I was taken back my hand and avoid his eyes. 

"You're good at acting in front media," said him stingy. 

I just smiled rigidly. I don't care what he says or think about me. Even it's always hurt me a lot.

Dinner comes and we sit on the same table since our parents greet some guests. He sits in front of me as I cut his steak. It just both of us here. I quietly glance at him.

"What a university that you will enter?" Asked me curious.

"I think you know the answered better than me."

He sharply looked at me and smirked like it's all my fault. I am not that said anything and just staring him. Even he always cold at me, I still have a warm eye for him. 

"Can't you stop bring me into your life? I am tired of just following your goals," said him.

"I never want it, you know that. Even marry you, I never want it too.." 

"Ahh.. how if we are against it together? I will give a half share of companies so that your family does not fell poor.."

I smile and look at his eyes even his acted hurt me so much. He wouldn't understand how the way I endure my life. But thanks to him, even I am alone in here, he gave me strength, even that just we said are the bad things.

"Okay, when the time comes, let's doing well.."

He not saying anything and get up after clean his mouth. I am sighed and finished my dinner too. My eyes catching him who greet some guest. 

Since young, I quietly watching him as growing up together. A cool man with a warm heart. I know his words always harsh to me, but still, I admire him so much. He nice to people around him, he always helps his friends, politely to old people, softly to children and lovely to her girlfriend. 

He is my first love.

I am never dating anyone even I accept