a/n - i wasnt really going to post this, but i had found it in my drafts and thought why not :) its super old, and honestly? not my best piece at all. im not really sure what i was trying to achieve, the pacing is awful!!! but enjoy? :o

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Moonlight streams across his face, the swirls of the silver reflecting against the smoothness of his milky skin, accentuating every detail that aligned the simplicity of his dull features.

Baekhyun shivers, the falling temperature on the streets of Seoul a surprise compared to a warm summer counting the scattered flowers of the cherry blossoms. 

He misses the blazing heat of the longer days, where nightime was a distant memory when the mornings stretched out in perfect bliss.

And love was the only raging wave of emotion that his heart knew how to pour out.

————————

“Its all in my hair now!” Baekhyun groans, brushing his fingers across the dyed strands in a desperate, but wildly pathetic attempt to remove the thousands of fallen blossoms that covered his black locks. 

She giggles, watching him struggle. 

“You chose this picnic spot! Who told you to be a smartass? We could have easily had it over the-"

“You like cherry blossoms! I just wanted this date to be perfect.” Baekhyun whines, leaning forward into her touch, a sign that he wanted her to help get the goddamn pink petals out of his hair. But she grins gleefully before backing away. Just to see his reaction. 

And sure enough, Baekhyun groans once more, a mumble of curse words darting from his mouth at her response. He gives her the dirtiest look he can muster before shaking his head, both fingers strewn across his hair to try and get all the flowers out. 

She thinks he looks the cutest like this, eyebrows furrowed and a pouty expression on his face. So she finally moves closer, giving in.

 Baekhyun sighs in relief as he watches her dainty hands scour through his hair, pulling out petals one by one. Then he leans in, pressing a quick kiss to the corner of her lips before she has the chance to hit him. Like always.

—————————

The weather is colder tonight. But Baekhyun continues on, his large black coat doing just enough to keep him from freezing in the icy streets. 

His hands have long been warmed in the pockets of his coat, fingernails digging harshly into the pits of his palm as he walks along. They burn incessantly.

But Baekhyun cant feel a thing. 

————————-

“I didn’t take you as much of a star gazer.” She teases, watching Baekhyun get lost in the dazzle of a thousand lights from above. He loses his focus for a second, gazing up at her bare face from the crook of her lap. She watches him watch her, a faint smile appearing in the crinkles of her eyes. 

“You dont see me staring at you all day?”  He retorts back, a gleeful smirk plastered across his face. He is proud of himself. But she groans at his cheesiness, rolling him off of her lap in the process.

Baekhyun lands with a thud on the rooftop floor, but all that could be heard was her soft, brazen laughter ringing in the quiet hours of Seoul. His favourite sound. 

————————

The flashbacks dont stop. Not tonight. Not ever. 

Baekhyun picks up his pace, fumbling with the chords of his earphones to turn the volume up louder. A sear of liquid trickles from his palms as he does so. He looks down. 

His hands are covered in blood, fingernail prints etched onto his broken skin. 

But Baekhyun thinks he likes them like that. Red and raw.

They represent his heart.

————————

“, baby.” 

Baekhyun lets out a low whistle, brown eyes darting across her figure. 

She turns around, watching him with a smirk. For the slightest second, his breath hitches. He didnt think she could look any better than she already does. But he was wrong. As per usual.

“We’re going to be late if you keep standing there being a ert.”

“Is it wrong to compliment my girlfriend?” Baekhyun moves forward, snaking his hands around her waist. He leans in, pressing a small kiss to the base of her neck. She’s wearing his favourite perfume.

“You always compliment me.” She laughs.

“Because you always look beautiful.” He hums against her skin, lazy kisses being trailed across the expanse of her skin.

Baekhyun cant wait to have her all to himself one day.

—————————

His hands wont stop bleeding. 

But Baekhyun continues on. 

————————-

“And do you think you’ll have everything ready by the 26th?”

Baekhyun nods politely at her father, a small smile oozing onto his face.

“If everything goes according to plan, then yes.” 

His fingers feel sweaty against her own palm. She squeezes gently. A sign of comfort. 

Baekhyun looks her way for a second, twinkling eyes making her heart beat louder in her chest. 

And when their parents talk amongst themselves, Baekhyun looks again, mouthing a faint ‘i love you’, before tracing the band of silver on her finger.

————————-

He should have brought a map. He always loses his way. 

, he should have brought his car.

————————-

“I have to warn you, separate keys cost more.”

“Its okay. For now, we’ll be fine with one.”

Baekhyun finishes up his conversation with the landlord, before strolling across the room - careful not to fall over the vast number of boxes strewn across the marble floors. He continues to walk before he sees her, gazing at the skyline outside.

“I picked the apartment with the prettiest view.” He mutters, absentmindedly her cheeks as she continues to watch, a faint smile darting across her face.

“You chose well, Mr Byun.” She grins, moving forward to string her arms around his neck.

Baekhyun breathes in her scent, watching as she moves closer.

“I did, didnt I?” 

He is mesmerised.

————————

And stupid. So, so stupid. 

Baekhyun huffs, annoyed. Angry. He always loses his way on this particular street. And there’s no one to ask. This area of Seoul is dead at night. 

Ironic really. Because he wishes he was.

————————

“I think we have to move.”

“Its only been a year though.” 

Baekhyun rolls over towards her. He reaches out to trace patterns on her bare stomach. She giggles, the press of his cold fingertips sending shivers across her back. 

“I know, but we need more space.”  Baekhyun inches forward, pressing himself against the softness of her skin. He brings the blankets over their head, cocooning them both from the winters ice. 

“We have another 9 months, silly.”

————————

Found. He has found the way again. He wishes he didnt. 

Because that means he has to keep walking. 

Walking towards her. 

Walking towards them.

————————-

Baekhyun watches with a pained expression as she tries her hardest to carry herself to the car. 

“Nope. Not today. Just stay home, I’ll call-"

“Baekhyun, I cant not turn up to my own promotion.”

Knowing he was still annoyed, she continued on, trying her best to coax him.

“Its only a few hours! And ive been working from home for weeks.”

“You’re 7 months pregnant, for gods sake.”

She sighs, stopping at the foot of the car. “Only a few hours.”

“Fine. But I expect you home when im back.”

————————-

The bleeding continues.  His palms are aching. 

Today, the memories hurt more. 

Still, he carries himself forward.

 He’s almost there anyway. 

————————

But she’s not.

The words “only a few hours” vibrate through his skull.  Baekhyun wasnt one to become so agitated, but coming home from work to an empty house had done just that. He was worried. And her voicemail wasnt going through. 

.

————————-

Here. He’s here. Hes here. He’s

———————

Worried sick. Baekhyun is worried sick.

“Babe, if you dont pick up soon, I might call the police. , pick up. Pick up love. I wanna know you’re okay. Please.”

————————-

Pick up. He wishes he could pick her up. He wishes he could hold her, and kiss the crook of her neck, and smell the scent of her cherry blossom perfume.

But he didnt want to get his fingernails dirty. 

—————————-

Baekhyun cries himself to sleep that night. And the next. And the rest of the year after.

—————————-

Rest. She’s resting. They’re both resting. 

Baekhyun would believe anything. Anything to make his pain go away.

——————————

And the rest of the years after that.

—————————-

He cries the most today, as he stares at the ground underneath him. The daisies from before had withered, scattering disgustingly across the floor. He tries to move them away, but the tears blur his vision. 

————————-

“Hello, sir? Is this Byun Baekhyun speaking?”

—————————

His hands are still bleeding.

—————————

“We dont know the details yet -”

—————————

One,

then two. 

—————————

“But we do know-”

—————————

Two new daisies are thrown towards the gravestone.

—————————

“That it was -”

—————————

Two splatters of blood fall from the palm of his hands.

—————————

“A hit and run.”

—————————

Two drops of tears drizzle down his face. 

—————————

“Mrs Byun has been found-”

—————————

Two.

—————————

“-alongside your unborn child.”

“They have been found dead. Unfortunately we were unable to resuscitate either of them.”

—————————

For the two he lost.