[ Five ]

“I miss your Jimmy Choos.” Minhyuk sighed that next shift the following Monday.

“You remember those?” I laughed, taken by surprise.

“You made quite the first impression.”

“They were the reason you hired me if I remember correctly.”

“Not the only reason.” He protested. “I could tell by the look in your eyes how much you wanted it.” I raised my eyebrow and he grinned.

“… And alright yeah I loved your shoes.”

“I still have them. They’re just not very work appropriate. What made you think of them now anyway?”

If I didn’t know him now as well as I did, a guy appreciating shoes would make my gaydar twirl, but Minhyuk most certainly liked women. He was just appreciative of fashion and I respected that. It often gave us something to talk about before Shin-Hye arrived.

“It’s Shin-Hye’s birthday coming up on the 18th February. I’m going to throw her a surprise birthday here.”

“You are?”

He nodded. “I’m actually going to close down at lunch and get everything set up so when she arrives for her shift we can surprise her.”

“She’ll love it!”

“I know.” He grinned. “I think you should wear your Jimmy Choos for the occasion. The theme is Chaebols.”

I chuckled at the term, seeing the irony in it even if Minhyuk didn’t. “Ok, I’ll wear them”

“Nice! Obviously it goes without saying you’re not say anything to her.”

“Of course I won’t, I’m not an idiot.” I glanced around the almost empty café, my eyes stopping on TaeHyung’s table out of habit, but it was of empty.

“I’ve invited him.” Minhyuk spoke, seeing where I was looking.

“Do you think he’ll come?”

“Ah, he’ll probably be busy.”

I wasn’t sure why he assumed that, but figured I’d bring it up with TaeHyung myself next time I saw him. Then again, the way we left things off I wasn’t sure if we were even speaking anymore. Had that been an argument? Looking back on it now the whole thing just seemed so petty and ridiculous. I hadn’t seen him since that time on Friday and we hadn’t met up over the weekend, though it wasn’t that uncommon. We didn’t spend everyday with one another after all.

But the way we’d left things left a funny feeling in my chest and I didn’t like it.

Shin-Hye was notably happier when she arrived than she had been Friday. And for the one after that, and the next…. Though I tried to match her mood over the next few days, I was still feeling troubled by my conversation with TaeHyung and his notable absence suddenly, so when he entered the café on Wednesday evening, I busied myself with wiping tables, so caught off guard by the sight of him I forget everything I had wanted to say. Not that it made a difference.

“Her attitudes changed.” I sulked to Minhyuk, watching Shin-Hye chatting with TaeHyung.

They looked so carefree, laughing about something. I hated to admit it but I felt a pang of unease seeing her getting along with him so well, when before she seemed to speak so cautiously of him. Something had clearly changed between them and I wasn’t sure what.

“They’ve always gotten along.” Minhyuk shrugged indifferently.

But not like this… Even when he finished his work she stood outside chatting with him, making it clear they were definitely closer than before. When he waved goodbye to her and left, I decided to do some investigation.

“What’s was all that about?” I asked, keeping my tone disinterested.

“With TaeHyung?” She confirmed. “Not much.”

I hated how blasé she sounded, because it certainly wasn’t ‘not much’. Hating the uncomfortable vibe I felt between us suddenly I didn’t stick around to chat to them both at closing time and fled home, making an excuse about apartment hunting. It was a half truth, since I was looking into apartments, but I’d already applied for those I was interested in and there wasn’t much left to do now but wait for the agents to arrange viewings.

“Are you ok?” My aunt asked as I towel dried my hair later that night.

Or morning, to be exact, since it was 2am. I was a night owl from working at the café and by nature, my aunt was often awake more often than she slept. When she ‘was in touch with my muse’, as she put it, she didn’t get much rest.

“Fine.”

“Well you don’t look or sound fine.” She frowned, joining me on the sofa. “Want to talk about it?”

I didn’t, but instead of making up an excuse I found myself telling her everything; how I’d first met TaeHyung, about our adventures, his stalker ex and finally our argument.

“–and we’ve not spoken since then, but he came into the café tonight and completely blanked me, spending his time instead talking with Shin-Hye like they were best friends when she has never spoken to him like that before!” I concluded breathlessly.

“Do you like him?”

I shook my head vigorously. “It’s not like that Auntie Kim.”

“Well then why are you jealous Shin-Hye was speaking to him ‘like that’”

“I’m not! I’m just saying it’s weird. They were never close before.”

“Well, neither were you with him. Maybe Shin-Hye has decided to try to get to know him more. Like you said, you had a bad opinion of him at the start. Maybe she did too and has decided to give him a chance.”

The thought left a bitter taste in my mouth. “So now he’s found a new friend so doesn’t need me anymore?”

“I’m not saying that, and you don’t really believe it either. You’re a smart girl JooHyun and a good person. Beautiful, too. TaeHyung clearly thinks so, otherwise he wouldn’t have made such an effort to get to know you. But just because you’re his friend doesn’t mean he can’t have others.”

I was shaking my head before she even finished speaking. “He can have other friends! But we had that argument and he didn’t even try to speak to me!”

“Nor did you.” She pointed out.

I hated that her words were true. I’d avoided him when he’d first arrived in the café, long before Shin-Hye had gone over to speak to him. Was he ignoring me because I was ignoring him? Suddenly I felt like a teenager and sighed.

“Friendships are difficult.” I admitted.

Aunt Kim gave my shoulder an affectionate squeeze. “All relationships can be difficult. They take patience, understanding and respect amongst other things. You’ll get there.”

“But it’s pathetic right? How I’m 23 and I’ve never had any real friends. Maybe I’m not hardwired to be normal.”

“You’re not pathetic. Your upbringing was bound to have had an effect, but it’s not something you could have avoided. It wasn’t an easy world we escaped from, no matter how affluent it was. I know you’ve come so far since moving here, but you still have obstacles ahead of you. It’s the joy of living a normal life, having to work hard and build your place in this world, in work and relationships. But I know you’ll do just fine, JooHyun.”

I hugged her back, touched by her words. My aunt was right; sometimes it was easy to pretend I was like others around me, working and hanging out with friends, but the reality was all of this was startlingly new to me. I’d never had friends before, I realised now, only people who called themselves that when in reality they were acquaintances at best. I’d never had to work for money, my life mapped out with no obstacles for me to climb over to gain any kind of experience in what the real world was like.

But I was ready to put my all into my new life.

I was vibrating with nerves during Thursday’s shift, eying the door for him to arrive. But he never did. Hurling the trash bags out the back door to the bins at the end of that night, I wondered if maybe I’d missed my chance to speak to him when I’d ignored him in the café. I contemplated waiting until Friday to see if he arrived when it occurred to me there were other ways I could speak to him.

Throwing the trash out I slid my phone from my pocket and opened up the single text