“I don't wanna talk about It I don't wanna think about it I'm just feeling low, feeling low
Even when you're next to me It's not the way I’m picturing I'm just feeling low, feeling low”

Chaeyoung woke up to the feeling of soft hands playing with her hair. Fingertips gently brushed against her scalp softly scratching here and softly there. As she gently opened her eyes she realized that she was sleeping on Jennie Kim’s shoulder while they sat comfortably on the couch doing their daily routine of old Disney movie marathons. Jennie was so engrossed in ‘the sleeping beauty’ that she didn’t even realize Rose’ was awake. Or maybe it was because almost as soon as she woke up Chaeyoung zoned out to the traffic in her mind

2016

‘It’s a big day’ Chaeyoung or Rose’ rather said to herself as she looked in the mirror one last time before their debuet showcase ‘this is it. Years or training and I have finally made it’ she smiled tearing up thinking back to how all the hardships had finally paid off. Once I’m out on the stage my life will never be the same again’ she turned around and looked at her members all rubbing their palms in nervousness and getting ready

‘Lisa-yah I could never have asked for a better best friend. I’m so glad we are in this together. Hope we can create just as beautiful memories together in the future as we have in the past’ she thought to herself as she looked at Lisa

‘Jisoo unnie. You are the best. You always know how to cheer me up. You are always there to make me feel loved when I am lonely. You are always there to make me see my worth when I feel worthless. You gave me strength when I was on the verge of quitting. You are a visual goddess on the outside but even more beautiful on the inside. I don’t how I could have done this without you. Thank you for being the source of all our strenths’ she thought looking at Jisoo who noticed her and smiled a comforting smile as she always did before their evaluations. Then finally her eyes darted to Jennie who was looking breathtakingly beautiful that day. Chaeyoung found it hard to take here eyes off the older girl

‘Jennie Unnie. I don’t know what else to say except that I am sorry. I am sorry I stayed locked in my room when you asked me to spend time with you. I am sorry I kept pushing you away. I’m sorry that we are distant today. It is my fault. I couldn’t control my feelings. But today as we begin a new life I hope we can have a new beginning too. It won’t be the same but I hope you know it is for our best. I don’t know if I can ever stop feeling for you the way I feel but I have to hide it deep within me. Forever. For us’

“Hey there sleeping beauty” Jennie’s voice bought Chaeyoung back to the present

“Uh Unnie. I’m sorry I didn’t realize I fell asleep”

“You must be really tired from our trip up the hill earlier” Jennie chuckeled “You were in such a deep sleep I thought I would have to give you the kiss of life to wake you up like the Prince had to Aurora” she saod refrencing the movie that had just ended. This turned Chaeyoung into a nervous blushing mess “What? I’m just joking don’t look so scared” Jennie wrapped her arm around Chaeyoung’s shoulder as she scrolled through her phone and came across photos of Jisoo and Lisa at the rooftop bar in Thailand that they had just visited.

Meanwhile sleepy Rose’ , despite the awkward moment a minute ago hesitantly cuddled closer to her Eonnie. Jennie’s warmth really comforted her, but there was something about her scent. It was sweet and comforting. It made Chaeyoung feel at home.

“Chaeyoungie” Jennie said studying the photos of their members “I was wondering if tomorrow you would like to go to the new rooftop hotel in town, for brunch. I remember Seungri oppa saying it’s good. I’ve been meaning to go there ever since”

Chaeyoung looked up to meet Jennie’s chocolate brown eyes “sure” she smiled softly trying hard not to stare. Suddenly Jennie yawned and pulled Chaeyoung in for a hug “I’m so glad we are spending these holidays together”

“So am I” Rose’ said carefully placing an arm on Jennie’s waist as the older girl wrapped both arms around the younger girl’s shoulders tightly

“Are you really?”

“What makes you think I’m not?”

I don’t know. You don’t seem so open to fun anymore. Remember how bubbly and enthusiastic you used to be whenever you came over before the debuet. We used to run around everywhere together. Now you are too quiet and secluded”

“Ohh I am sorry” Chaeyoung said sheepishly

“Don’t be. I understand you are stressed and tired but so am I. I just want you to relax and enjoy yourself for once. Will you do that tomorrow hubby for me?”

Rose’ smiled “Of course wifey. I’ll do anything for you”

“Oh really?” Jennie smirked “Carry me upstairs then”

Chaeyoung looked surprised but she obeyed standing up so Jennie could hop onto her back “Sorry if I am too heavy”

“Yep you need to cut down on carbs” Chaeyoung joked earning a slap on the arm

“You need to exercise more!” Jennie teased as Chaeyoung struggeled to carry her up the stairs. But Jennie laughing made her smile too. Maybe Jennie was right a little loosening up could do her good. She deserved to have a little fun after all.

“Come on Chaeyoungie. Nearly done! If you can make it up to the final step I’ll buy you desert tomorrow” That was all the motivation Chaeyoung needed to rush up the stairs with Jennie without pausing, but after she finally let Jennie down she collapsed on the floor “This is probably Karma for doing this to Lisa” Chaeyoung joked making Jennie smile her gummy innocent smile.

“Come on” the older girl tugged Chaeyoung’s arms

“I will have my revenge!” Chaeyoung announced finally standing up and walking with Jennie to the room

“Oh yeah? How so?”

Chaeyoung had an evil grin “Ghost stories!”

“Don’t you dare Park Chaeyoung!” Jennie said throwing a pillow right in her face and laughing. Rose’ Picked it up and threw it back but Jennie ducked “Ha!” she teased then dashed to the other side of the room as Chaeyoung playfully chased her “I’m sorry, I’m sorry” Jennie laughed as Chaeyoung cornered her and tried to tickle her “Stop stop I’ll buy starters too”

“That’s more like it” Chaeyoung grinned as Jennie playfully pushed her away.

That night as Jennie cuddled the younger girl, instead of being hesitant as usual Chaeyoung smiled. This was the most fun she had had with Jennie. Maybe she was over doing the whole pushing Jennie away thing. Maybe all she had to do was be herself and have fun with Jennie like the did in the trainee days. Yes her feelings were still there but she felt happier in that moment. Little did she know as she fell asleep that it would all fall apart the next day

**********************************************

The next day

“Oh my!” Chaeyoung exclaimed in disappointment.

“What is it Rosie?” Jennie asked fixing her white shirt

“The skies have opened up”, Chaeyoung said as she let her long and fair hands out of the window of Jennie’s bedroom to meet the tiny raindrops at her fingertips.

Though the weather was predicted to be clear without any hint of rain, the slight drizzle quickly turned into a noticeable shower.

“Looks like we have to cancel our reservation then” Jennie blurted out in displeasure. “No point in going to a rooftop diner when it rains like this” she sighed

“Guess we have to stay back now then?” asked Chaeyoung though she knew that the answer would be affirmative.

“Shall I order from the new place at Daegu? I have heard its pretty good too.” Jennie smiled at the visibly disappointed younger girl. “Or we could cook together! That’s always fun”

“I don’t know…” Chaeyoung gazed out of the window sadly “I was really looking forward to our brunch at the Grand.” Especially after her new found approach and reignited friendship with Jennie after the previous night.

Jennie had understood that Rosie was distressed about the sudden cancellation of their plans. Keen to bring Chaeyoung’s spirit up Jennie was desperate to appeal to her softer side.

“Let’s go down and sit by the balconey Chaeng! Lets welcome the rains even if it’s from a distance.”

Rosie could guess Jennie’s unnatural tone and quickly deciphered that her eonnie was trying to cheer her up. As much as she hated the slightest thought of possibly getting drenched in the soundly paced downpour, she appreciated her Jendukie’s thought and decided to follow her down the stairs.

“It does seem a little cold though” Chaeyoung stated as she put on a fancy sweater gown.

“Oh come on Rosie! Its been quiet a while since it has rained. Let’s have some fun it’s already short vacation as it is.”

Jennie then quickly jogged out towards the garden, swung her arms out and let out a decent cry of joy.

“Seriously?”

“Why not?”

“Fine!”

Chaeyoung joined in but felt an instant sense of regret as she realized that she was letting her expensive sweater get drenched. However, just as she was about to rush back inside Jennie caught her arm

“Hubby, hold up!”

“Eonnie my sweater is getting wet.”

“Oh come on Chipmunk don’t be such a spoil sport!”

“No!” she exclaimed repeatedly as she tried to get back inside.

A face to face hand tugging event had just been initiated.

Jennie as her ever playful ways was enjoying the rain and only wished that her younger bandmate would join in rather than struggle away from her clutches.

Just as Rosie was about to give in Jennie pulled at a larger than before.

Startled, Chaeyoung loosing the sense of her balance fell forwards. Jennie was taken by surprise as well and started to loose her balance as well. Rosie tried to catch her Eonnie, however her heels gave in and in a vain effort to prevent falling, she leaned forward towards Jennie.

……………..

In a couple of seconds both were on the ground Rosie on top of Jendukie.

“Ah hubby you are not as light as you seem” Jennie giggled wrapping her arms around Rosie’s neck who was still in shock, her hands, now slightly muddy, clutching the grass and her face on Jennie’s shoulder.

It was a position she didn’t know how badly she had wanted to be in for the past few days. Or rather, years.

Jennie patted her back, still giggling, asking Chaeyoung if she was fine.

Meanwhile Rosie had drifted away from reality into another zone. She forgot about her expensive sweater that was now muddy, her freshly manicured nails which were now chipped and her recently treated hair that was now a mess.

Her attention drifted instead to Jennie’s scent as she couldn’t resist the urge to shift her face to fit into the crevice of Jennie’s neck and slowly breath in her soft flowery fragrance while brushing her nose softly against Jennie’s neck. She had avoided doing this the last night when Jennie had held her so tight, but she couldn’t resist the urge anymore.

“Chaeyoung…” Jennie said softly in a confused tone. She was taken aback by what was happening, but feeling Rosie’s face against her neck gave rise to a tingling in her belly. “What is happening?” Jennie thought to herself as her grip around Rose tightened.

The next thing that happened took them both by surprise. Rose brushed her lips across Jennie’s neck to her cheek. Her heart raced and the butterflies in her stomach could no longer be contained as she placed a soft peck on Jennie’s lips.

What was even more surprising though was when Jennie leaned in as well kissing her back. Her hands slowly sliding down Chaeyoung’s back as she took her lower lip between hers.

The kisses were soft and addictive. Long and wet. Warm and passionate.

Despite the cold rain softly falling on them, their faces burned hot. Neither of them knew what was happening, yet neither of them wanted it to end. Their hands found each other and their fingers interlocked as they continued to kiss until Rose finally pulled away.

Their eyes met. The dreamy look in Jennie’s eyes turned to confusion as she saw panic in Rosie’s.

“Eonnie…I…” Rose’ got off Jennie and stood up so quickly that she nearly lost her balance once again. She looked down at Jennie who was sitting up, slowly pulling away from Chaeyoung

“I…” Tears choked Chaeyoung who had been taken aback by her own actions. Years of containing her fellings had finally poured all out.

Her swollen lips, now smudged with Jennie’s maroon lipstick, quivered. She looked away as tears pooled in her eyes and dashed indoors.

Jennie sat in the rain, just as shocked. Her face still burnt hot as she lifted her fingers to her lips that were already craving Rose’s softness again.

“What the hell” she thought to herself. “What the..What just happened…”

She wasn’t too sure if she was more surprised at the fact that Rosie had kissed her or the fact that she had kissed her back and wanted to kiss her again. She slowly stood feeling dazed and walked indoors to clean up.

…………………………..

Rose didn’t make eye contact with Jennie all evening. Even as they ate Chinese together on Jennie’s dinning table that jennie had ordered for lunch Chaeyoung simply couldn’t look at Jennie. Just feeling Jennie’s gaze at her made Chaeyoung tear up. Jennie noticed this but didn’t know what to say.

After she had eaten Rosie went straight to their room grabbed a jacket and dashed down the stairs again

“Where are you going” Jennie asked as Chaeyoung reached for the door knob

‘Ill be back soon” Chaeyoung walked out without even looking at Jennie. After shutting the door behind her she ran. She dashed across the streets crying. It wasn’t safe to be out by herself but she needed to be alone. ‘I have ruined it! It’s been destroyed! She will never look at me the same way again. Damn you Park Chaeyoung. Damn you!”

At home Jennie sat on the couch by herself trying to watching the television but she couldn’t. Her mind couldn’t focus on anything but what had happened a few hours ago

“Does she have feelings for me? Or was it just a platonic thing that happened by accident? It didn’t feel like an accident thought” she continued thinking “but why did I kiss her back? I don’t like her like that…or do I..?” Jennie didn’t want to think anymore. She picked up her phone. She wanted to call Chaeyoung and ask her if she was fine. Where was she? When will she be back? She wanted to talk about what happened. But she knew Chaeyoung needed some space.

Just then the doorknobturned

“Princess are you home?”

“Eomma! Appa!” Jennie dashed out to hug her parents

“How are you angel?” her father asked “Where is Chaeyoung”

‘I…uh” Jennie cleared “She went out. Said she had some work”

“Oh what work?” Her mother asked sitting on the couch

Jennie shook her head “She didn’t say anything

“You probably scared her away” Her father joked

‘I guess you are right’ Jennie thought to herself as she went to get some refreshments for her parents “So how was Japan?”