That perfect trumpet shape, crinkles softly undulating the edges, petals fanning around the outside like a carnival head-dress; she loved daffodils. With the bouquet in his hands, Jongin walked towards that old familiar bench that lay there for years. All the memories of her lay there. Crossing his legs,he placed the bouquet beside him, patting it safe on his side.With blank eyes Jongin stared ahead, tucking his frozen hands into the pocket of his coat.

Smiles. What caught his eyes were the countless smies on his view. He wondered about the last time he had genuinely smiled, how long it had been since then again? Three years? Five years? The fake smile that he put up with everyday was tiring. Here, under the snow, he wished he could hide himself and never come out. Children played around him with balls of snow in hands, giggling, smiling, laughing at each other. He hoped they'd never go through such sorrow in life like him, he wished they'd never have their hearts broken so mercilessly, that the smiles on their faces will stay the same every winter and not disappear like his.

While the month of celebration was bringing joy to everyone's lives, Jongin thought he was better off without it. December was just another month of the year, just another month in his life which he was barely living. Wintry trees stood as ballet dancers poised to show the world their grace, strength showing in how they remained so still in the seasonal gusts. Now that the leaves had fallen, they were so proud, as if their silvery-brown skin was their glory all along. Jongin lifted his head into the wind, eyes open for this softly lit day. Cold is good if you are warm inside. Which Jongin wasn't.

There was a warmth that tumbled out in the winter, when everything else was cold. It radiated from those who loved and nurtured as easily as they breathed. From the large grins on the parents' faces to the sweet acts of love in couples, hugs from friends and pats on the shoulder for a good job. Sparks of warmth were always there no matter what the season. But for Jongin, every month was a harsh, harsh winter.

For eight years, it had become a routine for him to sit there on the day before Christmas with the bouquet of the same yellow daffodils that she liked, with that little hope in his stone-cold heart that she would come, that she too wanted to see him sometimes. But for all those years, his expectations had been mercilessly shot down, reminding him that there was never going to come a spring in his life, nor a summer.

Biting his lips, he thought he would cry but the tears were frozen inside. He had had enough of crying, so much that the tears didn't even well up in his eyes anymore. The place was like a white canvas with of pink and blue and countless dots which were all the happy people around him. But he could see the white the most. The white was what blurred out all the happiness from his eyes.

In the glee giggles, he heard scrunching footsteps behind him. They echoed in his ears like no other sound. And then, someone sat beside him, keeping a long gap in between. It was a girl. Jongin could care less who sat there but his heart told him to look sideways. And he listened to that broken heart of his.

His heart broke into many more pieces when he saw her.

Choi Iseul.

She came, beautiful as ever. With her cat-like eyes and flowy brown hair, she was still so graceful. Like the countless pictures he had captured of her in his old camera, she sat there so prettily. He thought she wasn't real; it was just another illusion.

And was he right; she was just an illusion, his mind craving for her figurine beside him. She disappeared into the white canvas like she had never walked to him and sat there. He knew she won't ever come, yet he was sitting, waiting, wishing.

Taking the old tattered camera in his hands, Jongin thought he'd go throught the pictures he had taken that thursday at the Skiing Park. He loved snow, so snow was all there was in the pictures. Kids playing, running about, teenagers gliding across the frozen lakes. There was Sehun in a lot of the pictures because he had thought of accompanying him to the park and be the model for the photos though that had been just an excuse.

While looking at the third photo he had taken that day, Jongin closely inspected it as if there was something else other than the white snow in it. Well, there was, Jongin's eyes grew smaller as he arched his brows. There was a girl, though her face blurred out. A happy smile on her face as she raised her hand to touch the snowflakes falling from the sky. She was pretty, Jongin could tell.

He regretted not focussing on her. He had this sudden urge to go find her. Her bright eyes looked like those that cats would have. Her figure looked skinny, even under layers and layers of clothes. Jongin wished he had noticed her when he was in the park. He would've surely talked to her. Inside, he felt as she would have a good heart. Maybe they could be friends. But then again, chances of meeting her again was literally zero. And he couldn't go in search for a girl when he had so much study to do. He needed a scholarship. He could make friends later.

With that thought, Jongin placed the camera beside him on the bed. He had imagined so much by just seeing a blur picture