Black (feat Jennie Kim), released in 2013

Kwon Jiyong was doomed and he can’t let her go, not after getting to know her. So he did something that he’s best at, drowned himself with work, writing more songs than he ever had that year for both himself and big bang. It was also the darkest year for himself, with great fame and glory comes with black coal of life. With medias right on his neck, false accuse and rumours everywhere he goes, he felt suffocated with the pressure and expectation people put on his shoulders. The freedom and enjoyment he once had as an artist had come to a halt and went downhill, led him to depression. Thus, Jiyong only did one thing that would help him convey his feelings and frustrations, music, as he began writing song after song.

One dawn, he stayed in his studio alone, perfecting one song in particular that has a significant meaning for himself, a song that illustrate his current state. Immersed in his current fixation he didn’t realised the sound of the door opening and closing, as someone left behind a small ribbon packaged on the table behind him. Feeling exhausted, he stood up for some light stretching and realised the presence of the mysterious box.

Picking it up, he sees a small envelope attached under the ribbon. Ripping it off as he opened the envelope and read the letter inside.

Dear Kwon Jiyong sunbaenim,

You might not remember me but I’m giving this to you sincerely from my heart.

I wish you all the best for the upcoming album sunbaenim!

Himnae sunbaenim! I know it’s not my place to say this but smile more, please.

Stay healthy and be happy Kwon Ji Yong sunbaenim!

Sincerely, Jennie Kim

His lips unknowingly stretched into small smile as heavy feeling in his chest started to feel lighter. “How many sunbaenim do you need, pabo” he muttered to himself before safely keeping the letter back in its envelope. Unwrapping and opening the packaged box, he smiled at the stuff inside. Few packets of traditional Korean energy drinks, a few snack bars as well as a small black teddy bear keychain with the word ‘Himnae’ written on his belly.

Sitting on his large modern swivel chair, one hand holding a packet drink that was given while the other held the keychain. The smile never left his face as he felt giddy inside looking at the black teddy bear. That’s when it clicked. The word black.

Black, the symbolic colour for grief, death and sadness, but the colour black may also be represented positively, showing authority and power, the colour black can evoke strong emotions in someone. While black is the absence of colour, it is also the colour that is required for all other colours to have depth and variation of hue.

Finishing up his drink, he revised with lyrics of the newly titled song with a particular person in mind he hoped to collaborate with.

…

SBS Inkigayo 8th September 2013