hyunjin heard three faint knocks on his bedroom door. he glanced up at the clock hanging just above the door frame, and he let out a soft scoff. the time read 3:20 PM, and hyunjin still wasn't able to eat lunch. having inferred this, hyunjin knew that it was his mother on the other side of the door. he can already envision his mom carrying a plate of food in one hand as she knocks with the other. "hyunjin, come out and eat your food," his mother's voice rang through his ears, making him sigh and roll his eyes, showing that he didn't want to, even if his mother couldn't see it. again, there were three faint knocks. hyunjin's mother repeatedly called his name, waiting for his son to respond. more and more knocks were heard, making hyunjin annoyed, so he had no choice but to answer his mother.

"i'm not hungry," he said loudly, his voice sounding stern. he walked over from his desk to his bed, and he slumped his body down on the soft mattress. he picked his phone up from the table beside his bed and tried to distract himself by scrolling through some social media sites. "you skipped breakfast, hyunjin. don't skip lunch, too. you have to at least eat something. this is getting unhealthy for you." his mother's voice broke the silence.

hyunjin decides that his mother was right. the things he does were pretty unhealthy, but really, hyunjin didn't want to eat because he didn't have any appetite. another sigh escaped his lips as he put his phone back, and that was when his gaze fell onto the framed picture of him and his best friend, kim seungmin. the moment hyunjin glanced at the photo, a wave of memories entered his head. he can still vividly remember where and when the picture was taken, and he can still somehow remember the feeling of glee he felt when he spent time with his best friend.

hyunjin whispered to himself a prayer, and he wished that someday, seungmin would come back. it still pains him how his best friend didn't tell him beforehand that he was migrating, and it still makes him sad how he wasn't able to say a proper goodbye to seungmin before he left. seungmin didn't even leave his contacts, too, all he left was one letter of apology to hyunjin that he only got to read when hyunjin came home one day, and the kim residence was already left empty.

seungmin was the only person who truly understood hyunjin, no matter how complicated and confusing the latter might be. hyunjin was the type of person who appears cold and uninviting, but seungmin was able to break through that side of him, which made hyunjin trust him wholeheartedly. for their five years of being best friends, they've already shared a lot of memories, memories that hyunjin still hasn't forgotten even after seungmin left.

it has been six months since seungmin left hyunjin the letter. six months since the house next door has been left empty, six months since hyunjin came back to his cold and uninviting self. each and every day he wished for seungmin to come back, and each and every day he finds his heart breaking because he knew that seungmin will never come back, and no one else will ever fill the gap in his heart that seungmin used to hold.

"hyunjin, please," the sound of his mother's voice broke the silence. "i know you're still having a hard time, but you have to take care of yourself, too. please, do it for yourself. we're really trying our best to help you through this." hyunjin stood up from his bed and opened the door halfway. without a word, he grabbed the plate from his mother and closed the door. with that, he heard the sound of footsteps fading into the hallway, indicating that his mother has already left.

a sigh escaped hyunjin's lips yet again and sat on his bed. he fiddled with the food using his fork, still unable to find his appetite. for the past few weeks, he's been like this. seungmin's departure has affected him so much, that he couldn't even think and function well, even if he wanted to. seungmin left a strong impact in his life, and just the fact that he left without a word pains hyunjin so much.

once more, hyunjin wished that the heavens will perform a miracle and have time turn back. he wants seungmin inside the house next to theirs once again. he wants to spend time with seungmin again every after classes, every weekend, every chance they both get. hyunjin wishes that he had the chance to say goodbye to his best friend. hyunjin wishes that he was courageous enough to even tell seungmin that he was the best thing that has happened to him.

hyunjin felt alone. he felt alone for the past six months. he felt alone, depressed, and empty. he wanted things to go back to how they used to be, so each and every day, he finds himself hoping and praying that seungmin, the person whom he trusts, the person whom he can freely be vulnerable to, would come back.