Chapter 10

Reading Writing Romance

Minjun

Instead of sitting on the sidelines while Taec got Gain ready for bed, Jun joined in. He sat on the closed toilet in the bathroom while Gain and Taec talked excitedly about going on vacation. He hadn't seen Gain this excited about anything in what felt like years.

The group of friends had settled on spending the week at Kensington Resort of Chungju. The Hotel's claim to fame, aside from a full-sized bronze sculpture of its namesake in the lobby, was its indoor water park.

There was a wading pool and a series of water slides that dumped into the main pool. For the less adventurous, there was a lazy river. Jun wanted nothing more than to spend the entire week floating on a lazy raft, but knew Gain would be head-over-heels about trying out the water slides. 

With as excited as she was over going on vacation, Jun figured getting her down for the night would take hours, but Gain fell asleep after only one drink of water and two books.

While Taec had been in the shower singing a montage of the Wonder Girls greatest hits, Jun had been popping a bag of microwave popcorn. Even though he knew it was bad for him, Taec loved the stuff.  He wanted to start their talk off on the right foot and the way to Taecyeon's heart was definitely through his stomach.

He was setting the bowl of popcorn and two bottles of water on the dining room table when Taec walked in, his black hair still damp from his shower.

Jun wanted nothing more than to twist his fingers through the wet locks of hair and pull his ex in for a kiss that would show the stubborn man, without a shadow of a doubt, that there was still something left between them that was worth saving.

"Trying to bribe me with Orville Redenbacher?"

"Is it working?" Jun wanted to keep the mood as light as possible for as long as possible.

Taec nodded and grabbed a handful of popcorn out of the bowl "You were saying you wanted to go back in time." Taec pulled out a chair and sat, giving Jun his full attention. 

Jun had a feeling Taec was going to remember his line word for word "I think we've established what a I've been since that night with the plumber two years ago."

"We have." Taec said with no hint of sarcasm in his voice.

"Do you remember what our lives were like before we broke up?" Jun asked, his voice wistful.

"Of course I do, it's an awful lot like the last week has been." Taec shrugged "Just with a few differences."

"By differences, you mean my five-year-old daughter and the drought?" Jun waggled his eyebrows.

Taec offered a small smile "Like I said earlier at Junho's house, it was so easy to fall back into my comfortable role here with you. Don't get me wrong, I've loved cooking and helping to take care of you and Gain, but you can't blame me for not wanting to get physical when I can't even get you to talk to me about what the hell is going on between us."

"What do you want to go on between the two of us?" it was the coward's way out, asking Taec what he wanted rather than speaking what was in his heart.

Taec took a deep breath. The look in his eyes said he was thinking hard about Jun's question "I miss you. I miss what we were together when we weren't fighting." 

"I miss us too." Jun had missed their relationship even before Taec had told his version of events with the plumber "I missed not having you to come home to or fall asleep with every night."

"I get it. I really do, but playing house for Gain's sake isn't fair to any of us. I want to help the two of you find your way to a peaceful home together, but it's not fair to hijack me back into your life like this."

Is that what Taec thought? That Jun was hijacking him? "It started off with me just being so thankful that you could get Gain to take her bath and go to bed without having a meltdown, but then it morphed into me being so damn happy you were home with me again."

"It did feel good to be "home"." Taec made air quotes over home "But, this isn't my home anymore and you're not my boyfriend."

Taec's words, though not untrue, were like a dagger to his heart "My feelings for you are still here." Jun rubbed the heel of his hand against his heart, as if it could soothe the ache there. Spending the last week with Taecyeon had made his feelings grow even stronger.

Taec got up and paced around the small kitchen. He wore a tortured look on his face, like he was battling over what he wanted to say "I still have feelings for you too. I tried so hard to get over you Jun, and I haven't been able to."

It was easy to see the way Taecyeon's heart and head were battling each other. Jun had shattered his lover's heart when he'd broken up with him and refused to return any of his calls. It took a really big man to forgive that kind of behavior "It means a lot to hear you say that. What comes next?"

"Hell if I know." the look on Taecyeon's face said that he did know, but Jun could see there was fear in his eyes.

"If we're gonna talk about this we've got to be honest, like Doctor Nichkhun said." Jun was willing to take Nichkhun's word on just about anything after the way he'd helped Jay and Chansung last year, but in this case, he didn't need blind faith in Nichkhun to take his advice.  Being honest was the best policy with Taecyeon.

Taec cracked a smile and slumped back into his seat at the table "You do realize he's a pediatrician, right? He treats runny noses and diaper rash. He's not a shrink."

"Pediatrician or not, he's still right."

"Fine." Taec reached for another handful of popcorn, thoughtfully crunching until it was all gone.

"Would you be willing to consider getting back together?" Jun knew he was jumping the gun, but all he wanted was one chance to get back together with Taecyeon.

"I would be willing to think about it, but," Taecyeon drawled slowly "there have to be boundaries." 

"What kind of boundaries?" Jun was willing to agree to almost anything if it gave him one more chance with Taecyeon.

"We need to fix the things that broke us up in the first place."

Jun knew Taec was talking about his insecurity and jealousy "Okay. I mean I can tell you I've worked on my self-confidence issues, but until you see that for yourself, my word doesn't mean much."

Taec set a hand on the pile Jun had made with his own "I promise not to flirt with other men."

Jun in a deep breath. So many of their old fights centered on Taec's flirtatious nature. It was on the tip of his tongue to lay into Taec. To tell him Jun had known all along he was flirting with other men, but he stopped dead in his tracks. It was that kind of behavior that had thrown their relationship off in the ditch in the first place "I appreciate you saying that."

Smiling sheepishly, Taec lifted one of Jun's hands and pressed a gentle kiss to the back of his knuckles "It means more to me that you didn't launch into a rehash of our old fights."

"It took a lot of courage to admit your part in what broke us up. What kind of man would I be if I pounced on you in your weakest moment?"

"A drop-dead y one." Taec waggled his eyebrows. 

Jun laughed. It felt good to get this all out in the open with Taecyeon "Speaking of ..."

Taec leaned forward "I was hoping you'd want to talk about that. What happened between us the other night was amazing, but what would you think if we held off on being physical? For now."

Every time Jun looked at Taec he wanted to kiss his lips off. Being this close to him and not being able to touch him was torture, but if it's what Taec needed to consider getting back together, he'd do it "Okay, fine. No and I won't try to pressure you into changing your mind."

"We're leaving on Saturday to go to the hotel. Maybe while we're there it could be a trial run, of sorts, for trying to start over.  You know, to see if we can do it without our old demons getting in the way."

Taecyeon in a deep breath "I'm not saying no, Jun, but I can't say yes yet either. I just need more time to sort my head out."

"I don't understand. You say that all you've wanted for the last two years was for us to get back together and now that I'm offering us both that chance, you're backing out?"

"I'm not backing out. I still have feelings for you. There is so much at stake now with Gain. I need to make sure I want to get back together for the right reasons." Taec folded his arms over his chest. 

Jun couldn't deny understanding where Taecyeon was coming from. If it had just been the two of them to consider, Jun would have fought harder to get Taec to agree to try their relationship again. As much as he hated to admit it, Taecyeon was right. He had more to lose than just a possible second chance at love "I promise to give you all the time you need. In return, I need you to promise me something."

"Anything. Just name it." Taecyeon pushed forward in his seat.

"As soon as you figure things out, tell me. Don't leave me hanging." Jun hated being this vulnerable.

"I would never do that to you. The last thing I want is for either of us to get hurt." Taecyeon pulled Jun into a hug "How about a movie? I'll share my popcorn with you."

Jun snorted and pulled away from Taecyeon. This wasn't the outcome he had wanted, with Taecyeon saying he needed more time to think about the two of them getting back together. On the other hand, maybe it wasn't the worst answer either "What movie did you have in mind?”

"How about the least y movie we've ever seen?"

"Bridesmaids?"

"Doctor Khun was totally wrong when he said you couldn't read my mind."

 

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Taecyeon

Taecyeon pressed the mute button on the remote control, silencing Don Wildman and his latest Mystery at the Museum. He'd seen this episode three times already and practically knew the dialogue by heart.

Rolling onto his back from his side, Taec watched the flickering light of the television dance over the living room ceiling. He could still feel residual adrenaline pumping through his body, making him feel on edge.

He still couldn't believe Jun had asked him to get back together. Yesterday, it had been the one thing he wanted more than his next breath, but now that he was facing the situation in reality rather than fantasy, Taec realized there were some things he needed to work out in his own mind before he could give Jun an answer.

Chief among them was Jun's reason for wanting to get back with him. With him serving as a balm between Jun and Gain, Taecyeon wasn't quite sure if Jun wanted him back because he loved him and wanted to give their life together another try or simply because Gain was happier with Taecyeon around.

During their first go-round, Taecyeon had loved Gain with his whole heart. Being that little girl's uncle was a dream come true for him. This time around, he'd be her parent.

The title or extra responsibility it brought along with it didn't bother Taecyeon in the slightest. What did bother him was what would happen if he and Jun couldn't make it work between them. 

Gain had already lost her mother. Taec didn't think the little girl would survive losing him as well. She was too young to know that much loss. She deserved a loving family who was committed to staying together come hell or high water.

Taecyeon knew he was in it for the long haul, but what he didn't know was if Jun could say the same thing. It wasn't fair of him to judge Jun against his past, but his ex was the one who'd ended their relationship without letting Taec explain what had happened with the plumber.

Did Gain deserve to lose her second chance at a family because Jun was prone to flying off the handle?

Taec sighed and sat up on the couch. His light blue blanket puddled on his hips. If he'd learned anything in the last few weeks, it was that Gain was a tough kid, tougher than all of the adults around gave her credit for.

Was he really going to say no to a second chance with Jun because of how it would affect Gain? Or was it because he wasn't the one who wouldn't survive if their relationship went belly up a second time?

Hearing a tiny mewl at his feet, Taec looked down to see Blackie brushing against his ankle "Well, hello Miss Blackie." he scooped the tiny cat up and brushed her silky fur against his skin.

He was about to set the cat down when Gain started to scream.

"NO! Mommy don't leave me! NO!" 

Setting the cat down on the coffee table, Taec bolted for Gain's bedroom, nearly running headlong into Jun who'd made it to her doorway a step ahead of Taec.

"Gainoo?" Jun lightly shook Gain's shoulder.

Taec set his hand over Jun's as his ex tried to wake the little girl from her dream.

"Mommy?" Gain asked softly.

"No honey. It's Uncle Junnie and Taec."

Taec could feel Jun and Gain's grief course through his own body. He'd just been thinking about how strong Gain had been, dealing with her mother's death and now here she was screaming over some kind of nightmare.

"Do you want to talk about your dream?" Jun asked gently.

Gain wiped her fists against her eyes and looked back and forth between them "Mommy and I were at the beach looking for treasures. She told me how much she loved me and then..." Gain hiccupped while fresh tears coursed down her cheeks.

Taecyeon dreaded hearing what happened next.

"Then what, sweetheart?" 

"Then she disappeared. I was all alone on the beach."

Jun turned to look at Taec with a helpless look in his dark eyes.

"Did Mommy say anything else besides I love you?"

Jun scowled at Taec, clearly not understanding why Taecyeon wasn't trying to soothe Gain.

"She said Uncle Junnie loved me too."

Taec laughed "Of course she did, honey."

Jun looked like he was about to argue with Taec, but before he could say a word, Taecyeon set a hand on Jun's shoulder.

"I think that dream was your Mommy visiting you."

"You do?" Gain's eyes grew wide.

"I do. The only way Mommy can give you a message now is through your dreams and she gave you the two very special messages."

"That she still loves me even though she lives in heaven now?"

"That's right. And what was the other special message?"

Gain turned to Jun, setting a tiny hand on his cheek "That Uncle Junnie loves me too." 

"He does, sweetheart. So much." Taec exchanged a small smile with Jun.

"I know he does."

Jun snorted "How do you know, honey?"

"Because you got me Blackie and we're going on vacation and you don't get mad when I'm mean to you."

"Those are good ways to know that Uncle Junnie loves you. Do you think it would help more if he told you he loves you?"

Jun shot Taecyeon a surprised look.

Gain nodded.

"I love you, Gainoo" Jun whispered.

"I-I love you too."

Jun scooped Gain into his arms and held her tight.

"I love you too, Taec." Gai reached out a hand to Taecyeon.

"Of course you do! Everyone loves me." Taec giggled and pressed a kiss to Gain's messy head.

Jun rolled his eyes and raised an eyebrow. 

"Do you think Mommy will visit me again in my dreams?"

"I hope so, honey."

"She wasn't sick anymore."

"She wasn't?" Jun's voice was filled with wonder.

"No, she looked beautiful like before she got sick."

"Does it make you feel better to know she's all better?"

Gain nodded against Jun's neck.

"Me too." Taec whispered.

Gain sat back, looking between Taec and Jun "I think Mommy wants you and Taec to get back together."

"You do?"

"Yup!" Gain yawned and snuggled back down into her pillow already looking like she was half-asleep.

Taec gave Jun a questioning look, while Jun pulled the covers up and kissed Gain again. He reached for Taec's hand and pulled him out into the hallway.

"Why isn't Miryo visiting me in my dreams?" Jun sounded lost. 

Taec hated the sad, lost look in Jun's eyes "She didn't need to visit you. She delivered her message through Gain."

"Yeah, but I need her too."

"I know you do, Jun, but maybe she got sidetracked by Jim Morrison or John Lennon."

Jun snorted "That sounds like Miryo. Gain said she was beautiful again."

Taec pulled Jun into his arms "She was always beautiful."

"I miss her so much."

"I know you do." Taec could feel Jun's tears against the side of his neck. They'd spent so much time trying to deal with Gain's grief that he'd never given a second thought to how Jun was coping with his own.

"Come on. Let's get you tucked back into bed." Taecyeon tugged Jun in the direction of the master bedroom.

"I know you're not ready to get back together, but will you stay with me?"

It wasn't often Taec saw this vulnerable side of Jun and this was the second time tonight "Yeah, but if you start snoring, I'm out the door."

Jun laughed "Ah, excuse me, but you're the one who snores."

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Khunismyluv #1
Chapter 81: That was amazingly sweet
Khunismyluv #2
Chapter 78: Their conffesion to each other is so sweet
Khunismyluv #3
Chapter 44: Seriously taec is stubid
Khunismyluv #4
Chapter 24: Chansung is an a hole
Khunismyluv #5
Chapter 9: I'm making another comment because I really wanna upvote this
Khunismyluv #6
Chapter 8: Seriously I can't stop reading.... this story is amazing!
Khunismyluv #7
I'm glad someone recommended your stories to me
babikhun
#8
I miss your updates so I thought I should reread an old one
bbbrdwngs82
#9
Chapter 82: This story deserves so many more views, subs, up votes and comments. Everything about it was so beautiful and stunning and I'm not ashamed to say I cried more than a few times. All of the couples got their happily ever after and their children are lucky enough to have such amazing, understanding and caring parents
Jjwhwhwhwhhwh #10
Chapter 43: Omg Taec bottoming???? I love it!