Did I mention how much I hate having to sit through lunch period with all those boisterous people surrounding my table, with no available option to leave because of the overly crowded cafeteria?

I tried to munch on my food slowly, my temple pressed on the hand I had on the table, my eyes looking down at my tray with no expression visible on my face, trying to control my facial features from forming into entirely too annoyed and irritated expressions.

In usual days, I don’t really pay them attention, because they’re loud and I don’t want to risk prodding them only to have them latch on my shoulders like irritating pests, something I had attached to their personalities with the dozen of days I have spent observing them like a total creep (That was the only thing I was comfortably capable of doing without making their eyes gravitate towards me) They easily latched to people that gave them an opportunity to, and normally, it was an attribute I loathed because I hated being forced out of my comfortable bubble of aloofness and no-physical-contacts. But there was something that I noticed about them, not entirely too obvious, more like a feeling I have burning inside my tummy whenever I see them interact with each other.

They, my lunch mates, consisted of, of course, Chanyeol and Baekhyun; with three other people that I was sure were seniors I don’t know the name of. Two girls and a dark-skinned boy, with highly attractive face. They were, as usual, talking with each other with exaggerated volumes, and exaggerated physical gestures; and absolutely ignoring the one occupant of the table they’ve had carved their names right under mine without permission.

Not like I was allowed to voice out my permission or disapproval.

I felt a burning stare drilling heated holes down the side of my face, and I didn’t hesitate to pause from juggling my food around to look up at the culprit, finding Baekhyun’s naturally puppy-like eyes looking at me. He became sheepish instantly when I caught him, the corner of his eyes crinkling softly at the small he gave away.

Okay, he was adorable.

I just sent him an eyebrow up, face blank. He doesn’t think that we are friends now after that KitKat incident right? I thought wondrously, my heart going on a hayride when I remembered my real KitKat boy, the soulmate of mine who hadn’t talked to me for three days now.

Suddenly, my mood plummeted down, not like I was feeling incredibly joyous just seconds ago, but the mere thought my soulmate – probably the only person that could make me feel like I was right for this world — was ignoring me, made a piercing pain ignite within my chest. I couldn’t even sleep last night; thinking about him and sending him continuous messages he didn’t bother reply to.

What did I do to hurt him? Was the only question running inside my head, a question I didn’t know the answer to.

I was brought out of my reverie with a loud laugh, and I winced; looking up at Baekhyun with a look of annoyance. His laugh sounded like a bell sound, a tinkling melody that was so soft, but also so loud, creating warmth you don’t know the source of inside your heart. I’ve always noticed that, ever since he suddenly decided my table was good for him and his group of friends a year ago, and I’ve still been noticing his laugh. Unlike how everyone shushed him, telling him he had a loud voice; I felt the opposite. His laugh brought me.. ease, for some reason.

That didn’t mean he wasn’t annoying. Kind of.

My stare must’ve been so visible, as he turned to me with another sheepish look, his laughter ceasing into a soft tune of humming, ticking his head to the side almost apologetically. I found my lips curling into a tiny smile.

Seconds after that, he stood up with a loud announcement that he was going to bring himself water, or cold juice, and asked the entire table if they wanted something with. Since I wasn’t in the mood for food, and I didn’t really have anything to do; I listened to their conversation. None of his friends really wanted anything, so he left rather quickly.

Instantly, they all looked at me once he was gone; his friends, I mean, and I gave them a surprised look in return, wondering what was that look for.

“Em,” Once of the girls, a pretty little human being with naturally wide eyes and soft, small lips, tried to say, her nervousness for talking to me, their partner in table whom never bothered getting to know them, showing on her face. I merely stared back. “I know this would sound weird, but, what do you think about him?”

What? I pinched my eyebrows together in confusion, kind of not getting her point.

“We mean Baekhyun.” Chanyeol, his best friend, blurted out with equally wide eyes, the same anxiety the girl had had showing on his face too.

Okay, this really was weird.

“I don’t think anything about him.” I gave them a curt answer, slightly untrue since I have a lot of thoughts about him, like how he was annoyingly loud, but down to earth, and how mischievous his smiles were whether he meant for them to appear like that or not, or how kind-hearted he was but nobody really seemed to notice since it was what everyone expected from him, like a default trait; when he truly wanted to make people feel happy. But, these ideas of him were purely what I caught from watching him, since he was always just.. there.. wherever I was, and it was bound for me to catch up to some of his details since that is what I was good with. Unwrapping people like candy.

“I mean,” the same girl tried to speak again, sounding really worried now. I furrowed my eyebrows. “He hasn’t been feeling well the past three days, and we.. thought.. that maybe the rumors caught on to him. That’s why we’re asking you what you think of him, since you’re.. you know, quiet.”

I knew she wanted to say something other than quiet but didn’t want to offend me. Something like: outcast, loner, or the goth-like girl with no friends whom everyone are terrified of her default blank face. I furrowed my eyebrows a little, finding myself growing curious. What kind of rumors about Baekhyun that they were worried he’d hear? And why would they even bother asking me for my opinion of him as if it’d matter or change something?

“It’s just, you’re not exactly like everyone else here.” The girl tried again, looking entirely too sad and stomped about this whole thing. “You’re not fake like most of the students, and wouldn’t say something to someone’s face that is completely different than what you’d say behind their backs. We want to know if you thought of him like how they did.”

“What did they think of him?”

I asked, frowning. Wasn’t he popular among campus and had way too many friends to count? Why would there be negative rumors about him?

Most of all, why do they think my opinion would change everything?

The girl shared a look with Chanyeol, and the taller guy gulped, something I noticed; before looking back at me with meek eyes.

“They’re all friendly in front of him, and they all want to have a laugh or two with him too; but they all talk badly about him behind his back,” Chanyeol muttered, looking behind his back to check for his friend to see if he was coming, before looking back at me. “They call him things that aren’t exactly nice, like how he is a loser searching for attention, and they talk about his issue with his family like it is a joke. We’re not sure if these things have reached him, but we think that they did, because he wasn’t acting himself since Thursday.”

Oh, oh. So they’ve been bad-mouthing him behind his back, and they were worried about him. Although I don’t think it is my business – or that I should care to make it my business — but those people are s, period. He may seem to be.. overwhelmingly happy, joyful; and loves to spread glitters and rainbows, but that’s not a bad quality, is it? Why were people so mean? I don’t think there’s anything wrong with him, to be honest.

“He talks about you, you know,” Chanyeol’s words caught me out of my thoughts, and I shot him a quizzed look. What? “Baekhyun. He admires you, because you’re quiet and aloof, and don’t hurt anyone even though everyone says that you do. He has this huge respect for you even though he doesn’t really know you that much; and I think it’d be nice to know you don’t think of him like that.”

Okay, wow, that was a shock. I didn’t expect that at all. He respects me? But we don’t even know each other. Maybe I know a few things because of my love of watching people and reading their personalities; but he doesn’t know anything about me to make him respect me. It just, it was hard for me to understand what was Chanyeol really talking about.

I was going to say something instead of gawping at Chanyeol like an absolute, uncontrolled idiot; when the boy of our conversation came back to the table with a water bottle, and a muffin. He sat down on his previous place and shot them all a smile, unscrewing the bottle of water at the same time. I just realized that the smile he shot us wasn’t his natural, bright one. I mean, it was large, rectangular, and Baekhyun-like; but there was something dim in it, something weak, something shattered, and I felt something inside me shatter along with it.

Urgh, why do I have to be so weak for this.

“I don’t think he’s a loser,” I said, looking at Chanyeol; and everyone around us turned to me with wide eyes, not thinking I would actually say something when Baekhyun was here. The boy himself looked at me as if I had two heads on my neck, along a hint of confusion. I didn’t mind, really, I just wanted to tell them what I thought of him like how they requested, he didn’t need to know we were talking about him. “He’s warm, you know, I’ve noticed things about him, how he acts around people, and how he holds himself. He’s not a loser, far from it, and I don’t understand why he’d become so gloomy about what people thinks of him. That’s stupid, really, because they’re stupid to think that of him, and showing him that he cares about what they think of him gives them power over himself they don’t particularly deserve.”

Casually, not like I just ended a whole ing speech; I turned to my food, annoyed that it was turning colder and colder (not like I was eating) before looking back again at them, my eyes this time, focused on Baekhyun.

“You’re warm, okay? so ing much, to the point it is kinda disgusting,” I paused to grimace at his half-agape mouth, wide and confused eyes. “Those people who circle around you for a laugh or two don’t deserve what you’re offering, so just don’t offer anything, alright? It makes you look pathetic.”

I waited for him to nod in confirmation, or do something other than gape at me with his friends; before sighing softly, knowing that he wasn’t going to do anything aside that, and looking away.

In that moment of awkward silence, I was saved by my phone releasing a soft ding, and I took it out of my pocket with a snort, knowing who exactly was texting me, and what exactly he was texting me about.

“I’m so ing excited for this party! I even bough you that expensive you like to drink so much, you better hog the bottle to your chest and chug it all down in one gulp :)))))”

Oh, Joonmyeon.

-

“Where are you going?”

I swear, if Se jumped on me like that ever again and scared the heck out of me