Earth’s Boy

            Monday returned to Sehun faster than he wanted it to. The day’s weather was picture perfect. Blue skies, fluffy clouds and a blinding yellow sun. Sehun shut his curtains and took comfort in the darkness that came along with it. Today he had to go to school. He tried to only slip away to the garden on grey days. A day like this was too pretty for people to pass up. The garden would be overflowing with couples and families all trying to soak in the sun before the next cloudy day came in. Pretty days meant that Sehun couldn’t disappear, so he went to school instead.

            He reached campus at exactly 8:10, just like he did every morning. And just like every morning, he headed straight for the library. Sehun didn’t actually have class until 10am on Monday mornings, but he liked to be out of his house as soon as he could, or else he’d crawl back in bed and not ever get up again. Monday morning libraries were almost as empty as cloudy day gardens, and Sehun was eager to get to his favorite seat by the window and try as best as he could to disappear. But when he rounded a corner of ceiling high bookshelves, he saw someone sitting in his seat.

            Unsure of what to do, he sat at the table across from his usual one. This one was more out in the open and people would have to pass him if they wanted to get to the computers. Sehun felt exposed, he felt visible. Putting his headphones in and scooting his chair to the furthest end of the table, Sehun tried to shrink. He tried to make himself small and unnoticeable as he buried his face in his textbook. Sehun needed time to be invisible. He needed to be somewhere else, if not for the whole day, then at least for the morning, before he had to go to class and interact with his classmates and professors and the world. The need to be everything at once crashed upon him like a tidal wave as soon as he had to join the world outside of his apartment or his garden sanctuary, and usually the library gave him a place to go when he needed a break from regular everyday life. But today, someone had found his space and taken it from him.

            “Sorry to bother you, but can you help me with something?” A voice whispered from somewhere above Sehun’s ears and he wasn’t too sure if the question was meant for him, so he ignored it.

            “Excuse me,” the voice came again, accompanied with a light touch to Sehun’s shoulder. So soft, he wasn’t sure if he was actually touched at all. “Hello?”

            Finally, Sehun decided to answer. He turned in his seat and looked in the direction of the whisper. There standing in front of him was the person who stole his seat. Or, at least Sehun thinks that’s who it is. The moment his eyes left his textbook, the room became brighter, like the sun decided to make it’s home inside. The room was so bright, he nearly had to squint to look at the person standing before him. He blinked a few times, and the light adjusted. Sehun swore he could see traces of gold shimmering into the person in front of him as the room took on it’s normal hue. Light flashed before his eyes so quickly, he wasn’t sure if he even actually saw it at all.

            “Hi, sorry to bother you, but I really need some help.” The boy tilted his head as he spoke to Sehun, and smiled a brilliant smile of pretty pink lips that revealed perfect white teeth. Sehun nodded in response, and the boy continued with his request, “I’m having trouble finding a book.” A piece of paper was outstretched towards Sehun and as he took it, the boy’s fingers bumped against his own. The feeling came again, lightness, air, almost nothing except a trace of electricity where their skin came in contact for the briefest of seconds. Shaking it off, Sehun looked at the paper given to him.

            “Oh, we have the same 10am.  History of Ancient Civilizations with Professor Kim.” Sehun looked towards the boy, “I don’t think any of his books are left. I had trouble getting mine, as it is.” The boy’s face fell. He looked worried, and Sehun noticed the way his whole existence seemed to dull. The boy seemed to physically dim a little, become a little less bright. “Uh you can look on with me if you’d like. It’ll save you trouble and money if we just share a book.” At that, the boy lit up once more. His smile almost blinding, and Sehun was certain that he didn’t imagine the light from before.

            “Thank you! I knew asking you for help would be the right thing to do.” The boy laughed a little before sticking out his hand for Sehun to shake, “I’m Baekhyun, I’m new at this school, and I’m sure we’ll be good friends.” The boy’s eyes held so much warmth, it was like Sehun was into the sunlight of a summer day. Sehun couldn’t help but feel a little enchanted.

Aether’s Guardian

            Baekhyun met Sehun in the library every morning after that. And when the first major exam of the semester came up, Baekhyun met Sehun every afternoon in the library as well. They didn’t talk about much other than the material they were studying, but Baekhyun decided this was the way to help Sehun. He would take things as slow as possible, allow Sehun to get comfortable enough to open up to him, then once he found the source of Sehun’s darkness, he’d make it go away. Simple. Jongin was right, this was nothing Baekhyun couldn’t handle. He’d be back on Aether in no time.

            One rainy morning, Sehun didn’t show up to the library, or to class, or to their usual study sessions afterwards. Baekhyun wasn’t sure what to do. He couldn’t help someone who wasn’t there. Since they met, Sehun had always come to class. From the way professors seemed to favor him, he knew Sehun was one of the top students in their year,  probably in the entire school.  And out of the two of them, Sehun was definitely more studious than Baekhyun. Sehun was always nagging at him for getting distracted and for his messy notes. How can you learn if your notes are a mess? Sehun would say, and Baekhyun would just laugh knowing that notes were useless. There was nothing a guardian didn’t already know. Baekhyun had to find Sehun. Junmyeon would surely nag him for it if he didn’t. So the guardian left the library in search of the boy shrouded in darkness.

            Because Baekhyun is a god, he really didn’t have to do much searching. All he had to do was make a quick call up to Aether and have Junmyeon tell him where Sehun was currently located. Junmyeon nagged him for losing track of Sehun, reminded him of the time crunch he was in, and nagged him again for taking the easy way out and using his guardian abilities to pinpoint Sehun instead of just looking for him like a normal human being. He doesn’t have very many close friends, and the ones he does have, he sure doesn’t tell them where he’s going. So I had no one to ask. Baekhyun justified his reasoning and Junmyeon just rolled his eyes as he sent Baekhyun on his way.

            The garden was nearly empty. As Baekhyun walked through the rows of flowers and trees, he called the sun to come out a little, at least to stop the rain. After crossing a small bridge lined with rows of pretty red tulips, Baekhyun came to a wooden gazebo covered in ivy and roses. Inside the gazebo, sitting on a bench, where Baekhyun’s sunlight couldn’t reach was Sehun, tucked inside his own darkness. Baekhyun didn’t go up to him, he simply stood outside by the bridge and looked in. Sehun didn’t seem to notice him. He had his head leaning against the wooden beam of the gazebo’s railing and was focused on watching the remaining raindrops trickle off the leaves of the ivy. From this distance, Baekhyun could see why things were so urgent. Sehun was covered in grey. It was like the world around him was alive with color and Sehun was an old picture in black and white. He didn’t even try to fill himself in. He didn’t try to touch the rain or the leaves or the flowers, Sehun just sat there and let things happen around him. Baekhyun wasn’t even sure Sehun was there at all. He didn’t look like himself. Today, Sehun seemed drained and tired and troubled and Baekhyun thought that perhaps Sehun wasn’t a boy at all, but some elemental thing, made by crashing rain and endless grey clouds. Crafted by Junmyeon and Jongdae.

            He got it now. Baekhyun understood. People weren’t meant to look like this. They were made to be full of life, full of colors, full of both laughter and tears. But all Sehun was, was grey. And Baekhyun needed to find out why. Slowly Baekhyun approached him. With every step he took, the darkness around Sehun lessened, and the clouds seemed to retreat. Without saying a word Baekhyun sat on the bench across from Sehun, calling the sun out further, making it shine brighter, willing it to reach Sehun’s heart.

            “Hi,” his voice was sunshine. “I found you.”

Earth’s Boy

Sehun knew Baekhyun would find him. Sehun was an expert at becoming invisible, but somehow Baekhyun always saw him, “Here I am.”

Looking over at where Baekhyun sat, Sehun felt a little dizzy. The world had suddenly become brilliant, and that was something he wasn’t used to. Whenever Baekhyun was around the world hummed. Blues got richer, reds became deeper, and the garden was ablaze with color. Baekhyun radiated life. He was practically golden in the light of the fresh sun.

“You have so much light the plants grow towards you.” Sehun closed his eyes and allowed himself to be warmed.

Baekhyun laughed and Sehun thought that if sunshine had a sound, this would be it. “Some people say I’m made up of pure light.” Baekhyun tilted his head a little, something Sehun noticed he always did when he smiled a dazzling smile.

“They’re probably right. I swear, you literally glow, Baekhyun.” Sehun couldn’t help but smile a little.

“Is everything okay? You didn’t come to school today.” Baekhyun looked a little worried now, and Sehun didn’t like how his voice sounded like storm clouds.

“Everything’s fine,” Sehun lied, “I’m just a bit tired today.” When Sehun woke this morning he could hardly see the sun, and he knew that wasn’t just because of the cloudy sky. The hole inside him was bigger today and he could physically feel the emptiness spreading. It was hallowing him out, eating him alive.

“You should rest,” Baekhyun stood from his seat, “Let’s go.”

“Where are we going?” Without noticing, without willing himself to, Sehun followed closely behind as the pair made their way out of the garden.

“Your house. You need to rest.” Baekhyun walked ahead confidently.

“You don’t even know where I live.”

“Then, you lead the way.”

There was something about Baekhyun that made Sehun listen to every word he spoke. He knew that if anyone else wanted to go to his house, he would stand his ground and say no. But because Baekhyun made the request, Sehun found himself boarding the train and leading the sunshine boy directly to his front door.

“Don’t expect much,” Sehun commented as he opened his front door and invited Baekhyun inside.

“What would I even be expecting?” Baekhyun’s answer filled Sehun with relief. He didn’t realize he was nervous until Baekhyun made his nerves disappear.

Maybe that was why he didn’t want anyone to come over. He didn’t want their impression of him to change. Sehun knew he wasn’t the person people thought he was. To everyone who saw him, Sehun was the perfect son his parents always wanted. They never missed the chance to boast about all his achievements and all the opportunities awaiting him after university. And it was his responsibility to uphold that reputation, to keep his parents happy and proud. But anyone who came inside his house would be able to see how empty he really was.

“I don’t know. Medals and awards lining the walls. You know, from my endless achievements.” Sehun tossed his keys in the dish on the coffee table. During their study sessions, Baekhyun had found a way to make Sehun open up a little, and Sehun had told him all about his parents and how he was the pride of the Oh family. Baekhyun had looked at him with eyes a little sad and in a small voice he said, that’s a lot for one person to be.

Sehun left Baekhyun in the living room to look around as he pleased, and went to the kitchen to make some tea for the both of them. As the water began to boil in the kettle, Sehun heard Baekhyun’s voice again, so soft it could have been the wind, “You’re you Sehun, and that’s enough.”

Aether’s Guardian

Baekhyun knew that Sehun liked to be neat and organized. He could tell by his work and the way he carried himself. Sehun was groomed to be perfect, and it showed in every way he put forth. His apartment was no different. Everything in Sehun’s place was neatly put away. The dish on his coffee table was exactly in the middle. His blankets were folded and stowed in a basket pushed up against his sofa. His shoes were shelved neatly by the front door and his books lined his shelves in order by height. Everything Sehun owned had a place, and nothing was even slightly out of it. The only thing that stood out was the emptiness. Sehun had shelves and a desk, but neither of those held anything but books or work. His coffee table was bare except for the key dish, and his walls were completely empty. Crisp white staring back at Baekhyun.

“You don’t have any pictures.” Baekhyun commented as he walked into the kitchen to join Sehun.

“I don’t like pictures much.” Sehun replied as he fetched two mugs from the cupboard.

“What about pictures with your parents? You love them.” Baekhyun sat at the small dining table meant for two but only used for one.

“I do love them, but the only pictures I have with them are when I have an award in my hands.” Sehun took two tea bags from a box and placed them in the mugs, then he poured the water over top. “Would you like any sugar?”

“Honey, please, if you have it.” Baekhyun answered. “What about friends?”

“My friends and I are all too busy for pictures.” Sehun put the kettle in the sink and walked over to the table, cups of tea in hand.

“Everything in here is so perfect, it’s like a picture in a magazine. It’s like you don’t even live here. It’s like you don’t exist.” Baekhyun regretted the words the minute they left his lips. Junmyeon would surely nag him about choosing his words carefully.

“Sometimes,” Sehun stared down into his cup, “I wish I didn’t”.

Baekhyun stared at Sehun with wide eyes. He had never heard someone wish for something so grave. Part of his job as the guardian of light was to keep watch of the stars. He knew humans wished upon them and he had heard his fair share of thousands. Most were wishes for love or good days ahead, all pleasant things. This was the first time he’d heard a wish made of darkness.

“You don’t mean that.” Baekhyun said, trying his best to shine light into Sehun’s world of grey.

“The life I’m living isn’t really mine anyways, so I guess I don’t actually exist.” Sehun sipped his tea. He spoke the words so casually, like he wasn’t aware of the weight they held, “It’s not as nice as I thought it’d be.”

“What’s not?”

“Life.”

“You can always change that.” Baekhyun called for the light of the sun again, he called for the light of the moon and the stars, he called for all the light of the earth and the heavens and with all his power he willed it to pour into Sehun, to envelope his soul in gold.

Sehun’s darkness was unfaltering. It stood it’s ground and didn’t even flinch when Baekhyun began to glow. “The problem with my life,” Sehun looked at Baekhyun, unfazed by all the light in the room, “is that it’s someone else’s idea.”