Krystal stood there, her mind flashing back to a night nearly eleven years ago. She’d been heading to the bathroom when she’d noticed a little crack in her sister’s bedroom door. She’d peeked through and seen Yuri with her arms wrapped around her big sister, their lips touching. Then she’d been forcefully jerked away, there’d been shouting, then suddenly her sister had gone tumbling down the stairs.

“I thought you’d gotten this out of your system,” she came back to the present to hear her father say to Jessica. “I’m disappointed in you. Out.”

“Dad-“

“No more discussion.”

He trudged off to his office without looking back. Mrs. Jung shooting a look at the group of girls before storming past them and into her bedroom.

Jessica turned to Krystal, deciding that if she was going to lose her entire family today, she might as well know now. She held Yuri’s hand tightly in hers and turned to face her little sister.

“SooJung…I know this may be a lot to take in, and I know it might be hard to accept,” Yuri rubbed her arm, “but Yuri and I are together now. I know you’ve always wanted what’s best for me,” she looked at her girlfriend, “And I believe that she is what’s best for me. Do you think…do you think you could ever-“

Krystal threw her arms around her sister. “Of course. I love you. I actually-“ she cut herself off deciding to save it for later. “I’ll help you get everything together again. Do you have anywhere to go?”

Yuri stepped forward. “She can move in with me. I wanted…well…I just wanted to make sure your sister would be able to stand on her own feet first before having someone she had to rely on again. I know how much she wants to be able to take care of herself, but I’m not going to throw her to the wolves. Unlike her own family,” she growled, looking toward the rooms the elder Jungs had disappeared off to.

Krystal reached over and took Yuri’s hand. “Thank you. And I can already tell you’re much better for my sister.”

They got everything downstairs and into the moving van again, hugging and saying goodbye as Krystal waved them away, feeling like she had some sort of blockage in her heart.

Her sister…liked women. Krystal…she also liked women, but that stupid hidden memory had made her drive her away. Most of the memory had been gone but the fear had been left inside her of her father’s reaction and her older sister’s broken arm. It had caused her to suppress her preferences then toss away the one girl who’d gotten past all that when she’s been confronted with her tiny, beautiful s.

“Oh Amber,” she whispered.

Krystal didn’t often get drunk, but tonight felt just like the night for it. She’d debated in her head over and over again whether to tell Amber, ask for a second chance. But then the memory would arise that Amber had already moved on. And that she’d would really be left homeless if her father found out and kicked her out. She knew that Sulli would probably help her out, but she didn’t want to rely on something uncertain, plus Sulli’s stepdad creeped her out. He always seemed to be staring at her.

Maybe she could work and pay for her own place, but she didn’t really know what would pay enough to get her a place near the college at this point in the semester. She was fairly certain all of the student housing had been taken. She was also sure that if her dad found out the type of people she was into, he might stop paying for her college, then how would she ever be able to support herself?

How would she ever be able to be free?

She held back a sob as she laid her head down on the table in the back of the bar. It was the one she’d gone to with Amber back when Sulli had pushed them to have a drink together.

She resented her friend for pushing her to get to know Amber more. She regretted herself for not being able to stop thinking about her. She was angry about the way things had ended and angry at her father for being a homophobic bastard.

“You texted me that you needed me?”

Krystal squeezed eyes shut, horrified at the husky voice that she knew so well being near her when she was such a mess of confusion. “No, no, no, no, no,” she whispered, hoping Amber would just go away or was actually a figment of her imagination.

A hand landed on her shoulder and her body suddenly decided to remember every single touch Amber had grazed across her skin.

Another sob left her body and she felt Amber gather her into her arms, her head resting against Amber’s stomach while her arms grasped her slender waist.

“What’s wrong?”

“I didn’t mean to text you, I’m drunk,” Krystal admitted, a slight slur to her words. “I missed you. No, I didn’t. I didn’t miss you.”

“Okay,” Amber said quietly. “I’m going to get you into a cab home.”

She made to move away, but Krystal clung to her. “Don’t leave me.”

Amber sighed and pulled out her phone, calling a cab company. “I’ll ride with you to your house, alright. I don’t want you accidentally giving the driver all of your money. Stand up for me, alright?”

Krystal climbed her way up Amber’s body, burying her face in Amber’s neck when she finally got to her feet.

“I love the way you smell.”

“I’m seeing someone,” Amber hissed, pulling her away slightly. “Come on. The driver seemed nearby.”

“I didn’t mean to call you,” Krystal pouted, leaning against Amber’s side as she led her out of the bar.

“Don’t make that face at me.”

“You love when I make this face.”

Amber couldn’t deny it. She glanced up at the sky. She’d thought her feelings had been handled months ago. She should’ve known it was dangerous taking Krystal’s texts again. Then she’d run out of her house almost at midnight just to come to get her at a bar, the words ‘I need you’ pulling at her aching heart.

Why did Krystal have to smell the same as she did when they’d first met? Why did she have to be so annoying and cute and beautiful all at the same time? Why did her mind have to be stuck on memories of Krystal clinging to her and kissing her neck when she was trying to teach her how to solve equations? Giggling together and giving up entirely?

“Cab’s here,” Amber murmured, flagging it down and helping Krystal inside.

The woman kept her head on Amber’s shoulder, doing that thing that used to amuse and turn Amber on at the same time where she would bury her nose in that little spot behind Amber’s ear where she would spray light perfume each morning.

“You always smell so good, Embo.”

“Please, Krys…I shouldn’t have come.”

She felt Krystal’s fingers lay on top of, then entwine with hers. “I’m so glad you did.” Her soft lips pressed against Amber’s neck, causing her heart to jolt.

Amber pushed her away, glad that they’d reached her stop. She made sure Krystal gave the driver the right about of bills, helped her inside her gate, then got back into the cab to get herself back home where she would have to be surrounded by Krystal’s scent, now steeped into her clothes.

*You were right,* she texted her friend Tiffany. *I’m still not over her. What am I going to do?*

Tiffany answered with her usual lighthearted wisdom. *Cry tonight, then go on pretending tomorrow. Fake it til you make it, baby.*

Amber pressed her hands over her eyes, wishing she’d never let Krystal Jung into her life. And most importantly, into her heart.