DATE: 4.3.2018

WORD COUNT: 3,268

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​The lecture has ended before the bell rang, signaling the end of her last class for the day. It has always been the routine in her Anglo-Saxon Literature class. They were only asked to read certain parts of the book they were currently assigned to work on before the professor walked out of the lecture hall. Most of her classmates started chatting the remainder of the hour away while some did as their professor said and continued to read. She was one of the latter, and pretty soon, she was too absorbed in her own world that she didn't even hear the trill of the bell.

She only snapped the book close when she heard her name being called from the direction of the door on the higher level of the amphitheater hall. Upon looking up, she saw two of her friends waving at her, telling her to hurry it up. As usual, she forgot about their plan to have lunch together. She glanced at the book she was reading and reluctantly nodded at them in response before packing up, hurriedly glancing at the last page of the book she had read. Keeping that in mind, she took off towards the door, only to be met with shaking heads.

"What?" she snapped at her friends, arching a brow at them.

"I'm guessing you forgot," Nara said.

She shook her head no and laughed nervously. "I just lost track of time."

"The bell rang. Didn't you hear it?" Mina threw in. They were really out to get her that day especially since she accidentally stood them up the previous week, again, too preoccupied with reading.

"Too absorbed," she finally gave in and chuckled, receiving eye rolls instead. "Aww, come on, guys. You know how I am when I get started with reading."

"You tend to get lost in another realm," Mina stated. She seemed a bit miffed, considering how they ended up planning to have lunch because she had classes the whole day and Nara did not have time to go out in the evening due to her schoolwork.

"Which doesn't exist, by the way," Nara supplied which made them all giggle.

Still, she apologized as they made their way out of the university premises on Nara's Fiat. Soon, they were at the restaurant they wanted to try for weeks now. They haven't been able to go since they were all busy, and the one time they were all free, she failed to show up.

Towards the end of their meal, her phone rang. Already recognizing the designated ring tone she had set up for the caller, her two friends eyed her knowingly with cheeky grins plastered on their faces. She knew what those looks meant, and although she didn't want to answer the call in front of them, she did so, flashing them a warning glance. They tend to embarrass her at times.

"Hello?" she started, but before the person at the other end of the line can even answer, Mina and Nara started teasing her.

"Ooh! Is that the hottie junior from Theatre Arts?" Nara asked.

"What's his name again? Ah! Kim Mingyu!"

'Are you busy right now?' Mingyu, the caller, asked.

"Not really," she glared at the two girls. "Just about to finish lunch."

"Are you gonna go on a date?" Nara asked loudly.

"Shut up!" she retorted, unable to help it but laugh when Mina said, "That boy is hot. I'd do him anytime!" More laughter ensued.

"He's my childhood friend, you hoe," she said out loud then returned to talking to Mingyu who was also chuckling. He knew how her friends were. "What's up?"

'Hang out with me after?' he asked.

"Sure. Where are you?"

'Dorm. See you in a while?'

"Half an hour tops then." She forgot to say goodbye to him at all and did not even hang up, eyeing her friends. "You guys should quit doing that."

"Why? He's so damn handsome and tall. You even said he's nice," Mina countered, still giggling. "And have you seen that body. God, what I'd give if I could just take a bite out of that."

"Yeah," Nara chimed in. "I would have jumped him by now if I were you. What's stopping you anyway? It's obvious that he likes you, too."

Of course she knew that, and she always found him attractive, but she's known him since middle school and they've always been just friends, very close ones. She wasn't numb either where​ his feelings for her were involved, but she refused to act on it, thinking it would end up badly if she and Mingyu ventured there.

"Mingyu is just a kid...like a puppy," she answered, pocketing her phone.

**

She arrived at Mingyu's dorm a few blocks away from the university a bit past half an hour later. They still had to drop Mina off before they headed to her destination with Nara bugging her to tell Mingyu to come down and meet them by the car before she drives off. Knowing that she will just be in more awkward moments than necessary, she refused.

"You're so selfish," the owner of the car sulked, waiting for her passenger to get off.

"And you are a ert," she answered with a laugh as she got off the car, blowing a kiss to Nara's direction and uttering her thanks before walking off to the building entrance.

She took the elevator, her mind silently reciting the numbers of the rooms she passed by before getting to the right one. She was about to knock when the doo​r​ suddenly burst open, revealing her host an​d​ friend, tall and utterly gorgeous in a navy blue knitted sweater and grey sweatpants, his hair dark yet gleaming in the afternoon light. He smiled slightly, just enough to reveal the ends of his canines, ushering her into the unit by placing a gentle hand over the small of her back.

"Glad you could make it," he said as he led her to the couch.

"Mina held us back. Sorry about that," she murmured as she placed her bag on the couch and picked up the remote to see what was on the movie list on the screen.

"It's fine."

"Where are the others?" she asked, looking around before turning her attention to Mingyu who sat close beside her. There were three other boys who shared the dormitory with him, usually frolicking around half , not even bothering to put on shirts to greet her ever since she first came to know of their existence. Folding her right leg beneath her, she faced him and waited for an answer when she noticed how the boy was looking at her with seemingly frustrated eyes. "Are you okay?" she asked.

He nodded and said, "They all have classes."

"Okay." She didn't believe him, of course, but she didn't want to pry either. She knew him well enough to know when he's saying otherwise. It was suddenly awkward, or so it was to her, so she took it upon herself to bridge the space between her and Mingyu, snuggling close to his side and leaning against his shoulder while she picked up the remote and chose a random movie.

The atmosphere was charged with tension so thick she can almost feel it pressing against her. Just to her luck, the movie she chose was a romantic period drama. It seemed to be adding to the unusually heavy air in the room. For half of the movie, her eyes were intently fixed on the flat screen television, never daring to look at the person sitting beside her. She was just too aware of his presence, the sound of his slow, even breaths and the warmth he emanated.

A shiver ran down her spine when she remembered that day before she graduated from high school. Mingyu and his friends orchestrated an elaborate scheme to get her to the park where he confessed his real feelings for her. The result was obvious as they remained friends to the present, but it just wasn't the case for six months after she rejected him. He only seemed to have bounced back when she returned to their hometown the following autumn for the holidays. Those days were her darkest, and she did not want to go back to those days, afraid she might totally lose him.

Upon realizing that, she wondered why it was the case. When he finally joined her in the university, she felt happy, happier still when he started dating. He had a steady girlfriend for about three months just the year before, and when he told her, she thought she would feel devastated or something close to it. However, seeing how happy he was about it, she genuinely felt the same; felt his loss when the girl suddenly broke up with him to leave the country. She loved Mingyu, she knew that, but to what extent, she didn't know anymore. It had been the case since he broke up with his girlfriend, and she hated it when her friends about him.

She dared glance at him through her peripheries, betting her life that he was watching her. She could feel it. He didn't seem to notice that, and for the next minutes, she sat there on edge, pretending to be engrossed with the movie. Her hands were turning clammy, and she had the weirdest feeling that the room just got warmer.

Out of the blue, it struck her in the form of Mingyu's warm breath hitting the side of her head just behind her ear. She tensed on her seat when she felt his nose grazing her hair, the shell of her ear, getting closer to her jawline. All the parts of her body seemed to have stopped functioning when she felt his lips replacing his nose on her temple. He lingered there, breathing quickly before he shifted to her cheek, making his way down to the side of her neck, nibbling gently on her skin, making her tingle all over.

As if breathing for the first time, she took a sharp intake of air, suddenly making sense of what was happening. She felt him shift slightly towards her, his other arm snaking around her belly to hold on to her waist, but she held him still, facing him. She was unsuccessful as Mingyu immediately claimed her lips with his own before she could utter a single word, a hazy look in his beautiful, bright eyes which closed slowly the moment their mouths made contact.

He kissed her, a slow, burning kiss that etched itself on her skin and in her mind, making her heart race and her brain addled. It was gentle, light as if he wasn't even touching her, but somehow, she could feel him doing just that. For a second, she recovered from the shock and leaned forward to return the gesture, but better sense invaded her mind, making her realize just what she was doing.

She pulled back, holding him by the shoulders. He was surprised, but she was even more surprised that she had the willpower to think in the middle of all the chaos Mingyu was wreaking in her system. He leaned forward again, but she kept a firm hand on him and shook her head.

"Uh-uh, Mingyu." She exhaled loudly and swallowed hard. "W-what are we doing?" she asked him, closing her eyes in frustration and throwing her head back as if to clear her mind. She felt him ease back from her. "This shouldn't be happening..." Her eyes strayed to him. He looked hurt and sullen.

"Why not?" he said under his breath, his voice sounding like a low hiss. It was very atypical of him to be that angry.

She seized his hand. "Mingyu, I..."

"What?" He stood up, relieving himself of her touch, pacing around in front of her as he let out a bitter chuckle. "Is it because you think I'm just a kid with a foolish crush on you?"

She flinched visibly at his words. She never really said that to him, and it was clear that he heard her conversation with her friends earlier. "That's not -"

"Oh, then maybe a puppy," he offered.

She felt her eyes getting hot as tears threatened to fall, but she blinked them back and stood up, refusing to meet his gaze as he towered over her. "I..." she sighed. "I have to go." She turned towards the door.

"No, you don't," he countered.

"Mingyu, I think it's best if I leave –"

"Stop that," he commanded. "Don't dish that out right now. It's not gonna work this time."

She shrugged, giving up on the discussion and moved towards the door, but before she could open it, he turned her around so she was facing him and trapped her against the door, slamming a hand against the wood, avoiding her gaze.

"Are you going to hurt me?" she asked him, meeting his gaze squarely, but she was shaking against the door, confused and unable to think straight.

"No..." he shook his head. "I can't if it saves me." He leaned closer to her until his body was pressed against her, his handsome face contorted into an agonized mask as he attempted to smile down at her. He took her hand in his and placed it over his chest where she could feel his erratic heartbeat. "I just want to love you."

She blinked at him, all sense and reason leaving her. All she could hear were the words he uttered, playing in her head over and over again as she stared at him, unable to speak. She had no clue how she would respond to him, but inside, her whole being was screaming for her to say or do something. The thoughts, however, didn't want to form in . They stayed in her head until Mingyu backed away.

No.

He breathed in deeply and exhaled loudly, placing his hands on her shoulders. "Tell me you don't want me...that you don't feel the same way..." He gasped as if the words were physically hurting him. "Just say the words and I'll leave you alone."

She looked down on the floor. "I..." She hung her head for a while, all the thoughts she has had about him rushing back in a whirlwind until it halted to that memory in the park where he held her hand in his, waiting for a response.

'You see, Mingyu, I do not see us heading there,' she told him, all the while thinking, At least not now. She lied to him because she did not want him to wait for her while she goes away for her studies. She liked him very much, and when she rejected his feelings, she learned to be numb to hers and eventually got used to just being friends with him. It was better that way, she used to think.

Now, she didn't know what to make of things and all the feelings that lay dormant suddenly came to the surface, robbing her of her ability to say anything.

​Mingyu's hold on her slightly loosened, but before he could jump to an unwanted conclusion, she took the initiative and held onto him, pressing against his warmth. She chuckled, on the verge of tears. She didn't know why the salty liquid suddenly filled her eyes. Was it because she felt relieved that finally, she can be free once she utters the truth? Was it because she was frightened of what it might entail the moment she lets go of the words.

Mingyu wanted to pull away from her to see her face, but she held onto him tighter. He cannot understand either what she was laughing about. He, too, noticed the tears that were threatening to fall from her eyes before she took hold of him.

​"Goddammit, Kim Mingyu," she said under her breath, inhaling air through gritted teeth, her voice muffled by his chest. "You got me."

"What?" She wasn't making sense.​

"Back in high school..." She held onto his arm, afraid her knees would give out, her grip tight. "When you confessed...I want to apologize for lying to you." She swallowed hard.

"How did you do that?"

"I told you I don't see us going there, but I wanted nothing but that. I denied it and rejected you because...because..."

His eyes widened but he didn't know what to say.

​"Because I'm twisted like this. I would deny myself of what I need the most if it means protecting you from what my mind conjures as a threat to what might be. I c-can't risk losing you by putting a strain in the possible relationship that we could have and yet I did just that, didn't I?"​

"So you mean to say –"

"Yes, Mingyu, I liked you from the start." She threw her hands up in defeat. "I waited for you to tell me you felt the same way, but when the time came, I ran away from it and made up all those stupid excuses. I'm a coward -"

She wasn't able to finish what she was saying as Mingyu had sealed her lips with his, possessing her with his arms and meshing their separate beings into one in that single motion which elicited carnal thoughts in both of them. It ignited feelings and intentions that weren't even there to begin with. They both yearned for one another, and having suppressed it for a long time had them losing all restraint as one by one, each piece of their clothing disappeared from view, left in a trail on the floor leading to Mingyu's bedroom.

After all was said and done, after the sighs of pleasure and the profound confession of what they both bear in their minds and hearts, they both lay in bed, trying to make sense of what just happened, both feeling rather awkward but at the same time, overwhelmed of the emotions coursing through and between them.

She stared at the ceiling, cradling his head on her bare chest, still recovering her breath and still feeling very full in her nether region, throbbing all over yet without any feelings of regret, just plain satisfaction. Mingyu, too, was still breathing unsteadily as he attempted to get up, but was too weak, still getting down from his high. He shifted and planted a kiss on her collarbone, smiling lazily at her, his eyes droopy and his hair sticking to his damp forehead.

"I love you," he whispered then chuckled. "And you want me. That's obvious."

She rolled her eyes and attempted to push him off her, but he wouldn't budge, his chest reverberating with carefree laughter. "You're full of yourself, do you know that?"

"That may be the case, but don't deny the fact that you called my name many times in the height of your pleasure."

She smacked him on the shoulder and covered her face as she felt heat suffusing her cheeks.

He pushed against her and they both felt how he came alive inside her again. "So am I just a kid to you?"

She gasped at that but the look of embarrassment on her face turned into a tender look as she held his face with both of her hands, leaning up to plant a chaste kiss on his lips. She smiled at him then and ruffled his hair. "You're still a puppy." She embraced him, trapping him against the crook of her neck and both of her arms. "My puppy."

-END-

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