Chapter Twenty Nine - Christmas In The Silent Forest
Project 86Chapter Twenty Nine - Christmas In The Silent Forest
Snow. An endless blanket of white stretching to infinity. Huge flakes drifting down from the sky. The moon illuminating what little it could in the darkness of the night with cast iron gas street lamps providing the rest of the light. Most of the snowflakes were getting caught by the coniferous trees branches, piling up slowly, weighing the branches down. As far as one could see with the light provided endless trees spread in every direction. A single stone path cut through the forest, the streetlamps dotted on the left side of the road every ten metres or so.
Standing in the middle of the path was a woman in a midnight blue wool jacket blending perfectly with the dark background of the surrounding forest. A fluffy red scarf wrapped around her neck and white earmuffs warming her delicate ears, she stared up into the night sky with a smile and look of wonder, mouth open to catch the huge snowflakes onto her tongue.
One flake landed on her nose causing her to scrunch it up and let out a tiny laugh as it melted almost instantly, the water dribbling down her cheeks. She turned to look back down the road wiping the water from her face, a smile constantly gracing her lips. An endless ethereal joy filled her heart. She was at peace in this place. Happy.
Focusing back along the road she couldn’t see the end of it. An uninterrupted coating of white covering the path. Behind her the same scene presented itself. Either she had been standing there long enough for the snowfall to have covered her tracks in the snow or she had always been standing in that same spot. She didn’t know. She didn’t care.
Tightening her scarf, she began walking along the road. The only sound in the stillness of the forest and absolute silence was her footsteps on the fresh snow, scrunching and crunching under her winter boots.
Crunching.
Scrunching.
Her mood as high as ever, a constant smile on her face, the walking continued on. Eventually, after what seemed like an endless walk of the same forest scenery and same road, she saw a street sign and reaching it stopped for a moment. The sign pointed into the dark forest along a narrower path and with no lights illuminating the way. The snow was still falling at the same pace and she looked behind her. There were no footprints. She looked back at the street sign to read what it said.
Home.
The word called to her. It was inviting. But the darkness of the path scared her. Was home really there? Could she trust the sign? What if the darkness, the void, lead her only to ruin. Could she take the chance?
It had to be fine. It would be fine. No matter what happened everything would go as they would. Even if the darkness took her, even if the oppressive shadows enveloped her whole, it would lead her home. Eventually whether after a long trek or just around the bend, it would end and she would be home.
Straightening her jacket she took the first step down dark forest path. Then another. Soon she was heading in and the further in she got the darker it got, eventually the light of the street lamps disappearing into the shadows.
Once again silence reigned with the only sound coming from her boots crunching the fresh snow. Only for a moment though, as in the shadows rising she heard something. The hollow hush of the trees, the tree roots deeply intertwined, she heard a whisper. The silence, it was crying. The further she walked the louder it got and eventually somewhere in the distance further ahead a glow of light, ever growing the closer she got and soon she could see a single cast iron street lamp in the middle of a dark forest, lighting the snow fall. Lighting the crying girl crouched under it.
She walked up to the girl and kneeled in front of her. The girl had hidden her face in her knees, crying into her legs.
“Are you here all alone?”
The girl still crying and keeping her head down against her knees nodded.
“Would you like to come with me? I’m going home.”
The girl now only sniffling slightly nodded her head once again.
“What is your name?”
The girl looked up from her knees to see the smiling woman crouched in front of her; the large snowflakes falling on her brown hair looked like a halo. “Taeyeon.”
The woman’s smile spread wider. The girl looked familiar. In fact she looked just like herself as a child. And of course she would, it made sense right? As she stood up, she reached out with her hand to the girl. “That’s a wonderful name. My name is also Taeyeon.”
The girl now smiled back at the woman and took her hand as she helped her up. “M- m- my mom calls me Taetae,” the girl said as she got up.
Taeyeon with a snow crown on her hair, brushed off the snow that had piled on the girl’s head before once again reaching her hand out, the girl taking hold of it. “Well then Taetae, let’s go.”
Hand in hand Taeyeon and little Taetae continued onwards into the direction Taeyeon had been walking.
The iron street lamps glow faded behind them, the path in front of them going dark once again. More snow fall, always snowing. Soon glancing back the light could no longer be seen and once again it was a silent forest, this time filled with two sets of crunching snow. She wasn’t alone anymore. She had someone with her to walk through the darkness.
Even in the darkness they still knew their way, they knew which path to take. Somehow even when all light was gone and there was nothing to guide them, she knew what the right path was, what the right thing to do was. She didn’t need a light to tell her what she knew internally and that was comforting. That even when there was nothing there she was able to find the right way through it.
The way home.
In this darkness a faint glow was emerging. The change in it could be seen on the barely visible branches that were weighed down by the ever falling snow, on the now more visible flakes that silently and quietly floated down to gently touch land on every inch of the forest. The glow was ever increasing and lifted both Taeyeon’s and Taetae’s spirits as smiles spread on their face. They were on the right track.
It wasn’t the light that had guided them, no, they had walked through the darkness together with nothing to go on and found the light ahead themselves. They had found the light, the light hadn’t found them. They didn’t need the light for they had the light inside of them this whole time. They had found the right way.
The way home.
“There it is!”
Taetae released Taeyeon’s hand and went into a happy dash, skipping across the freshly fallen snow giggling to herself in excitement at the sight of a cabin. It had appeared from behind the trees amids the falling of the snow. A quaint little log cabin with the small windows radiating the shine that had been brightening their surroundings.
Taeyeon watched the happy little girl bounce up and down as she closed the distance to the warm orange hue of the cabin windows. She was almost able to feel the warmth out here in the cold forest as the large flakes kept descending from the sky eternally. The snow was still falling, always falling. Forever falling.
A flake fell on her nose and she scrunched it before looking up at the vastness of space and time. It was too dark to see much and with snow falling the stars were hidden from view. Just the ragged edges of forest trees lined her surroundings disappearing into the darkness above before white cold flakes fell down from the infinite black, as if the freezing void of space was shedding its coldness upon the earth.
Over by the side she heard a door open. Looking back towards the cabin she saw how in a flash Taetae had opened and disappeared in through the front door closing it behind her. She was alone again, but this time home was right in front of her just within her reach. Her boots crunching on the snow was no longer the only sound breaking the silence of the forest, as inside the cabin she heard the muffled talking of what she assumed was Taetae and somebody else.
The smoke rising from the chimney gently disrupted the branches above it, swaying them in the battle of hot air against the cold creating currents of their own, and Taeyeon could almost hear the crackling of the fireplace. She could hear the fire raging in the hearth, feel the warmth it provided. Feel the burn it could give if not careful.
There was life here, there was warmth, there was hope. Hope of future, hope of care, hope of love. She had reached her destination and all she needed to do was just step in and accept it. Just to step in. Step in. In.
But inside she was falling, spiralling down like the snow that blanketed the world hiding under it the forest and life and with its cold prevented rebirth and beginning anew.
Taeyeon stopped.
What if all she had hoped for wasn’t waiting for her? What if all that waited for her through that door was disappointment and sadness. Could she be brave enough to open the door, to walk into the unknown? But she had already walked into the dark silent forest alone, she had seen how her innocence, Taetae, had rushed right in without inhibition. It would be alright, right?
Her hand hovered in front of the door, a twisted knotted branch that worked as a handle just out of her reach. She wanted to pull on the door but it was just so hard.
She was falling.
Then the door opened and light flooded the front of the cabin blinding Taeyeon for just a while before she saw framed against the light from the cabin the outlines and shadows of an older grandma with a huge smile and an apron of hearts.
“Taeyeon, please come in we were waiting for you.” The grandma moved further in to give Taeyeon space to walk in and as she did all her worries were washed away at the sight of the interior of the log cabin. A large room with a kitchen, a living space and wood tables and fireplace. Safety. Home.
“My name is Taeyeon, but you can call me Nan. I’m old and a grandmother after all,” the grandmother smiled and ushered her further in.
“This was so far and deep in the forest. What will we do if we ever have to leave?” Taeyeon worried, having stepped in the cabin and closed the door but was still standing by the entrance. She was overjoyed at being home and safe, but her mind was already worrying about the what ifs, of the possibilities that might await her. What if they had to leave, how would they do that? She didn’t want to go, but what if.
Inside of her she was still falling.
“There is a time for such a worry, but that isn’t now. You’ve made it home so rest yourself,” Nan said giving Taeyeon a warm grandmotherly hug before offering to take her coat and showing her in. “Merry Christmas Taeyeon.”
The cute bubbly giggling of Taetae could already be heard from within the room and Taeyeon peered over towards the fireplace which was designated as the living space, with couches on two sides and a warm fur rug on the floor. Taetae was on her stomach kicking her legs back and forth in the air and filling in a colouring book with crayons. Hearing the commotion from the door Taetae stopped kicking her legs and dropped her crayons to look up at Taeyeon standing by the entrance.
“Merry Christmas Taeyeon!” Taetae shouted, jumping up from the floor and hurriedly skittering along to hug Taeyeon.
Wrapping her arms around her Taeyeon squeezed Taetae in a tight hug and lifted her up in the air, spinning her up and around the room. In an instant those what ifs and worries had completely disappeared. Did she need to worry about the future, about even having a future, if she could be stuck here in this moment with Taetae and Nan?
The hugs and arms had reached out and caught her. The falling stopped.
“Merry Christmas little Taetae. Want to show me what you were colouring?”
They made merry their time. Taetae playing with Taeyeon and then on her own. Nan having deep and caring words of encouragement for Taeyeon and indulging her self reflections while baking all the Christmas goodness that a grandmother would bake.
She had found a place of comfort. A place for home. A place where she would want to stay forever and forget about the future, it didn’t matter if it existed. Her past memories were unheard of and didn’t warrant a thought. Why did she need to think about those things when both of them were physically present here. When Taetae and Nan were here with her, she had all of her past and all of her future with her, with herself stuck in the middle as the present.
And presently she was sipping on hot cocoa, eating Christmas star pastries with prune jam filling and reading a book by the dining table. Nan working in the kitchen, Taetae playing by the fire.
Absolute peace.
In this peace she lingered her mind drifting out but not thinking of anything, not worrying about anything. She had found her home and was content. She had found her peace and had stopped falling. She could stay here forever.
“Oh, it seems she is just on time,” Nan said to nobody in particular but it caught Taeyeon’s attention and she looked up from her book.
Knock knock knock
Taeyeon’s head snapped towards the front door of the cabin where the knocking was coming from. Who would be here? It’s Christmas Eve and everybody was with their families, just like she was here with Nan and Taetae. Who would come visit them here in the silent forest?
The door opened and from the darkness into the light stepped a beautiful, tall and lithe woman, her face radiant in the warmth of the cabin. On her she had a snow white parka with a white fur lined hood, naturally white woolly mittens, fluffy scarf and a smile that could stop the world. She was like the angel and star that adorned the top of a Christmas tree. Pure and radiant.
“Hello Taeyeon,” the stranger said as she stepped further in.
“Good evening to you,” Taeyeon replied. Taetae kept drinking her hot chocolate as Nan continued to wash the dishes.
“You don’t know me and this is the first time I see you as well. My name is Yoona and I’ve come here to get you home.”
Taeyeon spread her arms around her with a bright smile. “But I am home.”
“Taeyeon, you know what she means,” Nan piped up from the stove, the gentlest of smiles on her lips.
Dropping her hands back down Taeyeon let her head droop to the side as bewilderment was clear on her face. Was she not home? She felt so comfortable here, safe, warm. She felt at peace. Maybe that was why it wasn’t really her home. And even with this comfortable safety she still felt like there was something missing. Something vital to herself.
The dragging of her left sleeve brought Taeyeon back to the present. Taetae was pulling it. She smiled at Taeyeon and then reached out to hug her. “I’ll miss you.”
Missing someone. There was someone missing in her life right now. Someone was missing from this ideal setting she was in.
“Say hi to Yuri for me,” Nan said as she put her oven mitts on and opened the oven. The smell of a fresh baked cherry pie filled the room immediately, the sweetness overwhelming all her senses. Nan pulled the pie out and placed it on the stove to cool down. She then took her oven mitts off and picked up a cake knife, cutting a piece of the pie onto a plate before walking over to Yoona offering the plate. “Please have a slice but be careful, it’s hot.”
Yuri. She was the one missing. Taetae let go of Taeyeon’s embrace, smiled and walked back to her place on the couch by the fireplace, picking up her hot chocolate and once again sipping on it happily.
Taeyeon refocused on the stranger Yoona who was standing by the entrance, still in her winter attire, happily munching away on the pie Nan had given her.
“This tastes divine!” Yoona said.
“Oh you are too kind,” Nan chuckled as she shuffled over to her rocking chair, picked up her knitting needles and continued working on the sweater she had been making for Taetae.
“I’m dreaming aren’t I?” Taeyeon said as Yoona swallowed another piece before nodding.
“Yes, and I’m here to wake you up.”
Her mind was returning memories and thoughts at a rapid pace. Once the flood gates had been opened after remembering Yuri, and the void that her absence had created was filled, she remembered everything.
“You said your name is Yoona? You’re the one that went into that Beyond place right?”
“Yes that’s right. We’ll explain everything once everyone is awake.”
“How is Yuri?”
“She is still asleep. I will go wake her up after you.”
“Is anybody else awake there?”
“Almost everyone,” Yoona smiled. “You’ll see them all soon enough if you’ll come with me.”
Taeyeon got up from her chair. She looked over at Taetae who stared at the fire, entranced by the dancing waves and the warmth it radiated. She turned to look at Nan who rocked in her chair smiling away as she knitted.
“Will I see you two again?” Taeyeon asked them.
“I’m sure we will see again,” Nan said. She looked up at Taeyeon with the kindness and love that a grandmother had. “We are all one and the same after all. Now go on Taeyeon, don’t make your guest wait on you.”
Taeyeon chuckled and then turned to look back at Yoona who reached out with her hand. “Shall we get going?”
Taeyeon walked over and took her hand following her out through the front door into darkness. She didn’t know when it had happened, but the realisation that the eyes she had held open as she stepped out through the door were actually closed finally hit her. And when she finally opened her real eyes she saw the familiar face of Jessica.
“Hi,” Taeyeon said trying to get up from her reclined seating position. Her body however felt heavy and muscles sore. There was no strength in them at the moment.
“Hi there,” Jessica said picking up a mug from a tray and walking over to Taeyeon. “The experience has been draining on you so you might not be able to move just yet. Here have a little drink. You should be able to move soon enough.”
“Where is…?” Taeyeon looked around the room past Jessica. To her right lay the sleeping figure of Yoona and to her left she saw both Yuri and Tiffany. Relief washed over her as she saw her best friends face, her tongue poking out from as it did when she slept.
“Yoona is now in the process of waking Yuri up. She should be with us soon.”
“Hey there Taeyeon, great to see you awake!”
Jessica looked over her shoulder and Taeyeon peeked past her to see Sooyoung walking into the shrine room that she was resting in.
“Sooyoung right? It is good to see you too. Were you also asleep? Who else is awake?”
“Yeah we were all asleep, everyone except Seohyun. Besides us, Hyoyeon and Sunny are also awake,” Sooyoung said as she reached Jessica’s side. “We’ll all be awake soon enough. Then we can go ahead with trying to fix everything that is broken.”
“Seohyun? The one that was supposed to meet us before…” Taeyeon remembered the blackness that had taken over them. The thing that had caused her to sleep. “What happened? What was that black we saw?”
“The dream world collapsed.”
“The what now? If it collapsed is it… am I…?”
“You are awake in the real world. It just means that everybody who dreams is in a coma because they can’t access the dream world,” Jessica explained, assisting Taeyeon further to drink from her cup.
Taking a sip from the cup Taeyeon leaned back down and wondered wide eyed about all that had happened. She had been dragged into a whole other world, an existence she had never thought would be real. It was just by chance that she was now here witnessing it in real life and being at the crux of solving it. This would be the biggest case that she would ever work on, no question.
Her nose twitched and she felt as if a huge snowflake had fallen on it and instinctually she scrunched her nose to get rid of it. She could feel the cold sensation melt away and all that was left was the warmth of the log cabin she had just left. Her body could feel little Taetae hugging her as Nan cooked by the kitchen, doting and spreading grandmotherly love. Taeyeon was still basking in the afterglow of that perfect dream. She missed it already. She missed them.
But now she was here and the explanations of the reality Sooyoung and Jessica had given to her were slowly beginning to come back to her, but she wished to go through her notes and ponder the questions further, to have some time to internalize it and understand it.
“Is my notebook somewhere close?”
“Ah, here it is,” Sooyoung said picking it up and handing it over to Taeyeon who thanked her and began to go through all her material she had gathered in the past days related to the coma epidemic. Maybe there was a clue in here that would help them solve it. A little bit of information that just needed to be remembered.
Glancing to her side she watched as her best friend Yuri slept peacefully at the side, but she saw the flinching and tightening of her muscles and eyes. Whatever the dream was, it wasn’t a blissful happy one like Taeyeon had. She could tell, she knew the signs on Yuri.
“I hope she is okay.”
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