[ May Prologue ]

I tried to act normal and that the words he said did not affect me.

He looked at me and smiled.

He had one of those innocent kind smiles.

"Did I say or do something wrong?" he asked.

" No" I put on my best fake smile.

He picks up the glass of water I have placed for him on the table and takes a sip looking at me.

For some reason, we didn't speak much but just had a lot of glances at each other.

" Sorry for causing you trouble, I am going to head back firs-"

" No, you didn't" I replied to him before he could finish his sentence. 

He sat back down into the couch and once again looked at me.

He was truly handsome and tall. 

I shouldn't be fantasizing so much about him... he was younger than me.

" Do you drink often?" he asked.

" I guess I use to... I enjoy drinking alone." I replied to him and he nodded his head softly.

" I guess, I can join you in the future" 

"Uhm..." I didn't know how to respond to that because I was worried it would go into an inappropriate direction. 

Not that I didn't want that but I was just confused. 

Especially with the fact that Jungkook is going out dating other girls while I have my stomach sliced open.

I was just in a confusing stage. I shouldn't do anything risky.

Right?

"... I guess you could" I replied and was internally slapping myself.

He reaches out his hand towards me and points his pinky to me.

" promise?" 

I was hesitant but then also took out my hand.

"Promise"

" Give your number," I ask him.

" Why?" he asked.

" So you can tell me if you got home safely" I replied and he nodded.

I am not going to ruin this boy, was the thought that kept running around in my head.

He got up and I walked him out. 

I walked back into my home and it felt empty. Well, it was sort of empty.

But just the lack of life. Made it feel lonely.

I took out my phone to google a picture of Sana. I had to get a closer look.

Praying to god that she would be ugly.

But no she was really pretty.

Talented. 

Can dance.

3 things that I can't 

All this self-doubt was rushing to m