warnings: language. very suggestive scenes. 

"all her fault"

❀

Every second of this is painful.

Minzy never imagined suffering like this before, in the same room of her beloved while the terror of her nightmares lingers by, not even looking at her. Not that he needed to because Minzy is agonizingly aware, her fingers only making the slightest tremble as she pours Kai another refill of his drink.

Kai, himself, notices but doesn’t say anything. And Minzy is thankful for it because it is better he play along than do anything stupid.

Not here.

Minzy is caught in a bind, her face smooth and professional but heart raging inside as she ignores Kai’s attempts of discretion. She knows it is hurting him, but she is also angry.

At his careless decisions, demanding she serve him in front of these people. This was the last thing she needed right now, and especially with the recent turn of events.

Just the thought makes her feel vulnerable, the tiny hairs all over her body up and alert. It feels like every pair of eyes in the room are watching her though only one matters.

Whether those eyes are watching or not, she can’t tell but it is enough to make her feel ill.

Kai’s voice breaks through for a moment and asks if she’s alright.

They hardly said a word to each other but it doesn’t matter because the chatter around them covers the awkwardness up. Normally, this appals Minzy because she knows how to keep a conversation going, but not this time.

She doesn’t want to.

“Minzy,” Kai tries again.

“I’m fine, mister. I told you.”

“Stop calling me, mister.”

“I apologise. I haven’t gotten your name yet.”

“You know what it is.”

“I don’t,” she deflects easily. Inside, she’s screaming. “And if there is a specific name you want to be called just tell me.”

Her client of the night, looking both dangerous and handsome in his black get-up that Minzy has never seen on him before, grabs his glass and takes another angry gulp.

He had glowed when she made her way over and sat next to him. He had been bristling with anticipation as she poured him a drink and smiled at him. But it all turned to once she offered him no more than that, refusing his advances and attempts at conversation.

It’s upsetting him but it’s the same for her too.

This is torture.

Kai ends up drinking the hour away. Minzy merely watches as she continues to refill his glass again and again as if she couldn’t be any more of the reason for his ruined night.

It is pitiful and sad, but it is all she could do.

Oh, Kai. None of this is your fault.

It was mine.

❀❀❀

A few days ago before Minzy was humiliated and tormented by Kai’s unforeseen appearance, her life had resumed its blissful ignorance, playing clandestinely in the shadows as if no one were to ever find out the things she has been getting up to.

None of her friends knew that she was still seeing Kai, his existence in her life kept under wraps like a hush-hush affair. That was why it was thrilling yet so innocent in so many ways that no one would understand.

Minzy needed Kai and Kai needed Minzy. The idea of losing what they had was far more devastating than the actual danger of it.

That’s why they continued to play it out, the routine they established seeming to work despite the odds and so maybe, just maybe, everything wouldn’t turn to —that was until Jiyong decided to dig his fangs deeper.

His infatuation seemed to get worse, and while that was not unusual but rather ideal, Jiyong was never just any client for Minzy.

He was also a figure from the life she had left behind, the only one that reminds of her of who she was before the club.

But because so much time has passed, this detail became buried on top of the things she already has to deal with, and she forgot the reason why she feared him in the first place.

So fate reminded her.

She didn’t see it coming, things going so well for her that she should have been more suspicious. With Kai at her side and her friends’ support towards her promotion, even Jiyong was becoming a steady fixture in her new life and everything was falling into place.

But perhaps, a little too perfectly.

Looking back now, Minzy overlooked so many signs until it was too late.

“Minzy, a gift was dropped off for you earlier.”

That tiny gift bag, pretty and chic with pink silky handles, was the first of these inconspicuous signs. Though unexpected, she accepted it because Minzy was always an appreciator of gifts even if she didn’t know who it was from.

Additionally, it was only a perfume bottle and it smelled very nice.

So that same evening she wore it because the one Jongdae gave her was running out and maybe it was time to stop mourning by wearing it as a keepsake. She had to get over his death.

A few hours later, that proved to be the right decision.

See, Jiyong had been demanding that night despite saying he couldn’t stay long and Minzy was too drunk to care. She let him rip her dress off and her on the nearest desk.

She barely remembers anything else but the smell of his sweat and that tinge of blood that came along with it. If he said anything, it was normally lost to the sound of their unholy union and the groans of the poor furniture he decided to lay her on.

But she does remember a murmur, so lecherous and pleased that it broke through her hazed state.

“As if you couldn’t be any more perfect…” He inhaled greedily, nose pressed against . “Now, you are all mine, Mingkki.”

Perhaps she only remembers this because of that nickname he used. It always bothered her that he used it like he had the right.

But later on, it made sense.

The perfume must’ve been from Jiyong.

This didn’t bother Minzy, not at first because despite the fact the scent itself was interesting, a sense of unexplained nostalgia coming over at the fragrance of wildflowers, it was the question of why he had chosen such a gift for her.

The answer would come to Minzy in the last time she would see him before the club.

It was a paid date that was spent in a balcony that Jiyong rented in a rooftop restaurant. They drank and chatted like they always did.

Minzy hadn’t expected it, only because Jiyong had shown more interest in spending time within the confinements of his penthouse since their arrangement. But he seemed to be in a good mood.

That’s why she gathered the courage to ask out of curiosity.

“This perfume I’m wearing. It’s from you, isn’t it?”

Jiyong stared, and then smirked after setting his glass down.

“Don’t you like it?”

“I do.”

“Then, what’s the problem?”

“Nothing. I just…”

“A girl like you deserve exquisite things, Mingkki. That’s why I put thought in every gift. Look at you. You’re glamorous than ever—irresistible, don’t you agree?”

If he thought her irresistible then she agreed. It was evident in the attention he has been giving her recently.

“Right…”

He offered his hand out on the table. Minzy took it with only the slightest apprehension as he weaved their fingers together. The hold was gentle but only for a bit as he brought her knuckles to his lips.

The gesture would’ve been pure if it weren’t for that glint in his eyes.

“You deserve nothing but the best,” he said charmingly. “Though if I had to be honest, I also thought it was time for a change. I’ve grown to detest the smell of jasmine, you see.”

He had laughed, the tremor of it flowing from his grip to her hand and the rest of her body. Or it seemed that way for the restraints of her heart seemed to quake and shudder in the realisation of what he meant.

He hated the scent of jasmine? Since when? Minzy would’ve known because she had been wearing that fragrance since Jongdae had given it to her and it never mattered until—

Not too long after, she turned pale but Jiyong never addressed it.

Instead as the wine lulled her brain and nausea sloshed inside her, he had taken advantage of it back at the penthouse with his kisses as if it would be the only thing that could save her.

“You know,” he had murmured against her hairline. “I never liked redheads, just like I never liked it when people do things without my consultation.”

Minzy barely heard him, her head swimming from so many things like the throb in her head and the hips that pinned her to the bed. But she remembered his grip, quite firm on her jaw as he continued to speak. 

“I hate dealing with things like that. It’s irritating. But you know what?” He lowered his voice and all pretences fell for a moment. “It’ll never beat the way I felt when you said his name in bed.”

Naturally after that, Minzy became a wreck.

When Jiyong had to leave abruptly for something important, he left Minzy on the bed with sore thighs and wet eyes. It was only when he was surely gone when the tear gates loosened.

Just as she was learning to let him go, the revelation of what truly happened to Jongdae began to haunt her.

Jiyong did it, didn’t he?

He must’ve. He must’ve, and it wouldn’t be the first time. He always did it when he didn’t get his way. That’s why her family…

A sob escaped her, memories of her past coming to assault her. Fear and distraught joined her aching heart, the empty hole that the notion of family had filled now bare and raw once more.

It was him. It was always him. No one else would be so selfish. When her unni couldn’t give him what he wanted, he did the same thing. He was the one that orchestrated everything then and it was still him now.

Nothing has changed.

She believed in the power she harnessed over him, the art of seduction she willingly learned to get the better of him. For her, it was the only sort of control she could have over him and that was why she agreed to Bom’s offer to join the club even if it meant being within his reach.

But Jiyong was still too powerful, no qualms in getting rid of the people he didn’t like as if th