“Oh!” Yoojung was stumped.

Sohyun stared blankly at the field.  She had asked Yoojung to meet her there before training starts.  “That’s right, “Oh!” My exact feelings when he said it,” she said calmly. “I thought it through yesterday and I still don’t know what to do. I’m so confused now.”

Yoojung took her hand and gave it a squeeze. “My opinion is, if the relationship is too difficult, forget about it. I’m not saying relationship should be easy but should it be this difficult to even get going?”

Sohyun bit her lips. She understood where Yoojung is coming from, that’s why its difficult for her to decide. Her heart wants him. Badly, because no matter what, she truly loved him and has not stopped even after what happened. But her head kept questioning if it was wise. He might break it off again if their relationship affects his goal. Could she accept that she would always not be his top priority?

She stood up. Smiling at Yoojung, she said bravely, “I don’t have to decide now. Let’s go for our training.”

When she approached the field, her eyes quickly found him in the middle of it. He was talking to a few of the players. Before she could tear her eyes away, he looked up and immediately saw her. They stared at each other from afar. Sohyun only turned away when Yoojung tugged her arm.

“I thought you are undecided. Why are you staring at him then?” she asked with disapproval. Sohyun kept quiet.

After training later, she joined the group for dinner. She was eating her when she heard MInseok called out, “Cap, we are here!” She looked up surprised to see Seungho walked into the restaurant. His eyes were searching the group before it landed on hers. He gave her a tiny smile. She quickly looked at her food.

Throughout dinner, Sohyun avoided further eye contact with him. However, she was very conscious of his presence. She didn’t want anyone to notice how she was affected by his presence, she engaged herself in conversation with the junior cheerleaders on the other side of the table.

Buzz. She looked at her phone that was buzzing and saw that it was a message from Yoojung, asking her to meet her outside.  She excused herself and both Yoojung and Sohyun walked out together.

“His eyes kept straying towards you even though he was chatting with us. I’m sure Cap will approach you at the end of dinner. Are you ready to talk to him?” Yoojung asked. Sohyun, her head lowered, tapped her feet on the pavement and she shook her head. “Then go home now. I’ll give an excuse for you,” she advised. Sohyun looked at her friend gratefully and nodded. Yoojung waited for 5 minutes before she entered the restaurant again.

Seungho wanted an answer. He has been anxious since Saturday and he joined the dinner today, hoping to get to speak to her.  He was therefore surprised when Yoojung came back in alone. Before he could ask, Yoojung casually mentioned that Sohyun had left because she wasn’t feeling too well.  He felt deflated. He knew she left to avoid him.

From .

I heard you are not feeling too good. Do take care of yourself. Good night.

Sohyun stared at the message. She closed her eyes as she remembered their day at the beach. Despite her reservations, she had enjoyed that day. After she dropped her resistance towards him, they were engaged in lively and interesting conversations. He makes her laugh easily with his jokes and teases and she felt comfortable with him. She remembered the warmth of his hand and how good it felt. Could she find someone else that makes her heart flutters just from a look or a touch? She sighed and pulled her blanket over her head, trying to hide from reality.

The next day, he waited for her at her car. He had asked Jieun to wait for his call before coming to the carpark as he wanted to talk to Sohyun. When she saw him standing by her car, she took a deep breath and draw out her inner strength. They stood a couple of feet apart, just staring at each other.  Sohyun with an impassive face whereas Seungho’s eyes were searching hers, trying to read her.

After several minutes of silence, he spoke, “Are you feeling better?” Sohyun nodded slightly before she shook her head quickly. “Oh, you are still unwell?” Seungho asked, concerned.

Her eyes flickered to the side before returning to him. “You knew I wasn’t unwell yesterday. I left earlier to prevent you from approaching me, like what you are doing right now,” she said bluntly.

Her sharp tone distraught him. It seems she had made up her mind not to get back together. His mind went blank momentarily. “You’ve made up your mind..” he murmured to himself.

Sohyun did not hear him. She was upset at him for pushing her into a decision. “You cannot spring something on me and expect an immediate decision. Not after what you did. Not after how much you hurt me. I need time. I need to know if I want to risk my heart for you again. But if you can’t give me that, and you want to know right now, then my answer is no,” she blurted out angrily.

His mood uplifted when he heard that she was still thinking about it. Holding back a smile that was creeping up on his face, Seungho quickly reassured her. “No, no. Don’t tell me now. Take your time. I’ll wait for the answer.” He shot her a lopsided smile.

“Could you move then? I need to get to the office,” she said briskly.

“Sohyun,” he spoke. She was about to move when he called her. She stopped and looked at him.  “While waiting for your answer, could I still approach you? Not for this answer, but to chat or ask about something, or ask you out for drinks, lunch or dinner. I mean you can say no to all of that, though I hope not. Just don’t avoid me, please,” he asked warily.

She stared long and hard at him. She knew what he was up to. She was still deciding when she heard Jieun’s voice shouting at Seungho that she will be late for her appointment. She saw his eyes flinched when he heard Jieun’s voice and a look of guilt replaced his earlier hopeful face. “Ok,” she said quietly and quickly slipped into her car.

Seungho smiled as he watched her car left the carpark. He turned to Jieun who had walked to him. “I thought I told you to wait for my call,” he said sharply as he walked towards his car. Jieun walked beside him, “I did. But you were taking too long. And I am going to be late.”

In the car, Jieun saw that Seungho’s face has brightened up. “Are you dating her again?” she asked. He didn’t answer for several minutes. “I hope to. Wish me luck,” he said quietly. “You don’t sound confident. She’s not interested?” she asked, curious. “She needs time to think about it. That means I still have a chance,” he replied, a smile crept up on his face. “I hope she decides soon, cos I missed her.” Jieun turned to look at the road ahead. “What if she makes a decision soon but it is a no?” Seungho shook his head. “If she wanted to say no, then she could have done it. But she didn’t,” his voice was full of hope.

The next day, at training, there was a joint briefing for their upcoming match. It was a big game and they were expecting full support for both teams. Only once during the briefing that their eyes met. He acknowledged her with a brief smile before continuing with the task at hand. Sohyun appreciated that he was giving her the space she needed.

Sohyun did not see Seungho the next few days. After bumping into him daily, sometimes several times a day, it was disconcerting when she did