Vegetarian Wars

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Description

In which Jaejoong is a clumsy vampire, Yunho is an affectionate werewolf, Changmin is a cynical wizard-in-training, Junsu is the sweetest demon ever, and Yoochun is the bored human who triple-dog-dares them all to start a boy band.

(Yoochun smirks and hands each of them a matching set of ugly leather jackets. "Make mama proud, boys.”)

Foreword

Look man. My other stories are sad. I wanna do something happy. On to the corny jokes.

(Ugly cover photo courtesy of yours truly and some trashy collage maker. You're welcome for blessing your eyes with my talents)

Character Profiles

Park Yoochun

21 years old 22 now, essssss! Watch out for the Chunster | a bored human | manager

"I'm just a lonely soul whose only companions are a bunch of crazy people. They put me through hell; I have every right to exploit them."

-

Kim Jaejoong

1,575 years old (21 in appearance) | a clumsy vampire | lead vocalist and better than Changmin

"If I had one thousand won for every time I was (rightfully) called beautiful, I would be able to open my own national bank."

-

Jung Yunho

1,470 years old (21 in appearance) | an affectionate werewolf | rapper

"I love Joongie and Chunnie and Minnie and Su and everybody in the whole wide world and oh my god, is that a squirrel?"

-

Shim Changmin

19 years old | a cynical wizard-in-training | vocalist

"I am surrounded by idiots. Also, Jaejoong is ugly. his bank."

-

Kim Junsu

1,320 years old (20 in appearance) | a sweet demon | main vocalist

"I...I am supposed to devour the souls of the living, but...I am much too shy. Can we not be friends first, please?"

Things to Note Before Reading...

1)
If you didn't notice already, this is an OT5 (Yunho and Changmin of TVXQ with Jaejoong, Junsu, and Yoochun of JYJ) story of absolute fiction that takes place in the present. Any inconsisties with real-life that this story may have are, while not necesarrily intentional, not accidents either. Just remember that this is all fake. All for fun. No harm intended. Just trying to a have a super duper swell time here, and I hope you do too.

2)
I'm (as always) trash with spelling, grammar, and pacing, so if you see any errors in my writing, just know that it's not the last where it came from. I'm going to try to re-read my work and edit it as I go, but...hey man, I'm too lazy for all that. Sorry in advance.

3)
This story will have one type of POV in it, more specfically, third. For once. Ha.

4)
Three cheers for freeform writing styles, ayyy.

5)
Critique as much as you please. I probably need it. No, I most definitely need it, so hit me with all you've got (but like, don't be a spoiled milkshake about it and be rude). Don't forget to try and enjoy the story as well though.

And finally, 6)
I love you x 1,000 *dramatic smooch*

Onwards now, my lovely shippers! To chapter one with you! Please?

Planned Update (Episode VIII):
lmaoooo broooo I am such a messsssssss

-

Sneak Peek
~ talent show time, kiddies -- but fr this time, i swear ~

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Comments

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Kattan69 #1
Chapter 8: Hahaha...that must be the principal.
Neng2ovid #2
Chapter 8: So now they know about yoochun. I wonder what would happen to them
Sharo001 709 streak #3
Chapter 8: Thanks so much for the lovely update, I had forgotten how much I enjoy this story. It’s so much fun, and I love the personalities of the characters. It’s also the perfect story to read at 4am, I haven’t laughed this hard in ages. Kudos to you, Author-nim. （╹◡╹）
Kattan69 #4
Chapter 7: Wonder how they are going to pull it with the hunters coming after them....can’t wait to read it....^_~
Rainypixy #5
Chapter 7: Oh my! Oh my! You updated! You really updated! GOD! I love you soooooo much. I’m soooo exited right now that i can’t even find the right adjective for the way i feel. I love these combination of weird characters you got together in this story and don’t get me wrong i love your other stories, but this one somehow managed to play with my heart so thoroughly that i can’t get enough of it. I wholeheartedly missed your amazing characters these past few months. Like reallllyyyyyy missed them.
Oh my ! Thankyou thankyou thankyou like millions and billions of hugs and kisses.
Love you and hope you would do great at whatever you do or plan to do ?❤️
yunjaemrcnn #6
Chapter 7: Glad that you didn't abandone this story
Neng2ovid #7
Chapter 5: Hahaha you back. I’m so happy. Let the fun begin again.
NattyMarie #8
Chapter 6: Chapter 6: Well, first off, thanks for the update. I was waiting patiently for it.

Second off, thank you for the shout out for me and Rainypixy. I'm glad you didn't find my comment too long to be read (I always face that, especially at my work and social media which make people irritated).

Third off, I was completely overwhelmed with mixed emotions while reading this chapter.. It's as you said, it isn't fluffy like the previous ones. It made me tear up and laugh in the same time: laughing is for the cute YooSu moments and how Suie is cute (finally learned our language) and tearing up was during Chun's self thoughts about himself and how he hinks he isn't wanted (trust me, based on experience, I can relate to his feelings --> hence the tearing up). This mix makes me wanting to hold on Chun here (even in the reality) tightly and really protect him from the world!

Fourth off, I'm glad with the very slight improvement with Jae trying to be a little bit nicer to Chun even if it involves intimacy blackmailing from Yun.. Min is still being meanie but can be nice on rare occasions. Suie is confusing me with the line about Chun "being experiment" which I hope it means nothing bad since Chun is clearly head over heels for him. Hope his feelings will be reciprocated.

Finally, despite the mix, I'm glad you wrote it this way.. I get to see Chun's insight about himself.. Hope that the other four will make him feel good about himself and to help him realise that he is a good person the way he's (doesn't need to be a carbon copy of his brother, so that everyone will accept him!)

*A secret between you and me, this story makes me missing having all of them together as DBSK (crying in a corner)*
Rainypixy #9
Chapter 6: Wow you’re really amazing my friend i maen God knows whenever i think to myself “can it get more interesting and unique?!” , you’ll come back with another bright idea to add and make your creatures more charming. I maen heavy saeguk replacing those cute xiahtic lectures was really an ace!oh and junsu’s note pad, that’s even brighter. I really really have to quote what changmin’s said once: “ junsu is my religion” and i should chang it to “ author-shi is my religion”! I really love how your brain works and i can’t get enough of this story and i’m like sooooo suger rushingly (if that’s even a world ;) ) waiting for another chapter.
And you mentioned me and Nattymarie and even dedicated this chapter to us two?! God! Are you for real?! Are you trying to suger rushing me to death?! Oh i really need the warm blanket clingy werewolf yunni to hold me and cuddle me through my tears of joy. ( and yes jae baby you can glare and pout and all, all you want. Yunni won’t let go of a crying little human thingy)
And Babe! “I simply love you to death”
Hearts and kisses all over the place ;* ;* ;*
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