I am aware we are all in a time of grieving. I wasn’t even in the states when I found out about our beloved Jong-Hyun and the tragedy that followed. I personally thought it to be a terrible prank. Even though I’m doing a little better now, I still feel an emptiness in the air. I still feel like he’s going to pop up, just like he did on his return to the group after his car accident. 

This is normal, family. It’s normal to hurt. Cry. Even be angry. Believe me, I was so ing pissed at Kim Jonghyun for being such a stupid dino, BUT my love for him is never ending and will never die. I will always be here for you all. We are one big family! In this hard time, our family will only grow stronger and closer and we will continue to support SHINee in whatever happens and whatever they are going through. Yes, it is hard on us, but just imagine how THEY feel and Jjong’s family as well. From here on out, I will only smile and cheer for our boys. To remind Jong everyday just how well and awesome he truly was and IS. It will get easier everyday little by little. My goal is to never forget the legend of Bling bling JJong, and to continue lifting his name up along with his music and his band. 

Don’t do anything rash, my loves. If it’s too much go cope with, reach out to any of us! We are family and there are others feeling just as you do! WE’VE GOR THIS! And when we all get to heaven, we can tackle that Dino and give him hugs and kisses like we’ve all dreamed about. (After beating him up of course.) 

I will also still write about Jonghyun, because no matter what, I know SHINee as FIVE and he will always be apart of them. Right now it doesn’t feel right... I still can’t even watch videos of him or hear his voice, it’s too hard. But I know it will get easier. I know life must go on and I know Jong wouldn’t want us to live like this. 

One last thing, as someone who struggles deeply with depression, this has truly opened my eyes and I am reaching out for help. I am taking this leap and I ask that those of you who also struggle, please do the same. 

Kim Jonghyun. You beautiful freaking Dino looking fool. You did well. Your hard work paid off wonderfully and I wish you could have seen what we all do. You did so so well. We love you. We honor you. We miss you. And we will beat you up for leaving us so early. 

Ps: please don’t be too annoying to M.J!! 

We love you. 

You did well. 

Rest easy our love. <3