After I’ve Lived A Full Life
A FarewellJonghyun,
To begin, it really hurt my heart of your sudden death. I may not have been a diehard SHINee fan, but I loved and respected the group for their talent and music. To be completely honest, you were the one that caught my eye first when I was introduced to you five. I thought you were really pretty ?. I then took the time to look each of you up, and I was amazed by your voice.... I fell in love with it right off the bat. I also loved your personality, you were humble, funny, honest, sweet, a firm believer in everyone around you, and a very, very brave soul. I call you brave because of how strong you were in hiding all your hurt. It also hurt me to know that you thought of yourself as less than... it was enough that persons were horrid enough to say that you weren't good enough, but there is power in words... and it made you hurt. Your hurt came through as depression, and you tried as much as you could to fight, but I guess you couldn't fight it out anymore. I was once in that same problem... I thought less of myself as I was bullied throughout grade school. It got awful... I self harmed, rebelled against my family and dud drugs for a bit. I started to fight too.... I was diagnosed with anxiety at 13, depression at 14, and I've had anger issues since I was around 10. Honestly Jjong, if we as fans, as human beings with a heart had known, you would have had the best support system... well, you did, Shawols everywhere had your back. But, I can speak for everyone who loved and respected you when we say we are so ing sorry we weren't there for you in ways you really needed. Sadly, what's done is done... and you're at home in the clouds. Watch over us, and have fun. Collab with MJ, Elvis, Prince, Bob Marley, rap with Tupac, Biggie Smalls, Lil Peep, rock out with Linkin Park's frontman Chester, outsing Whitney and Amy Winehouse.. and, by any chance, if you see my Uncle Gary or my Grandma Shirley, tell them I said hello. I'll be able to see you soon. After I've lived a full life. I'll try as much as I can to be the best version of myself, and overcome all my obstacles. Until then, sleep well Jjong. Have fun as a free man. We love you ❤❤
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