Bold Italic - flashback

...

The first night they met Kwon baby, Seungri remembered well what Jiyong had told them that revenge wasn't on his dictionary. The leader promised himself he would never do the same thing to someone who hurt him, whether he knew the person or not.

But, all were lies.

Seungri wanted to curse so bad at the lack of truth Jiyong gave to him and Kwon baby.

A tool? Are you kidding me?

Jiyong sometimes could be cruel, but never to this extend, Seungri believed.

There was a reason why he was the leader of this amazing group. Jiyong was not a selfish person, as long as Seungri could remember.

If he was, why would he give all of his best compositions to them?

Why didn’t he sing them by himself?

Seungri still remembered how hard it was to convince Jiyong that Lies was better sung by the group than himself. And then, there was a time when Youngbae really loved the song Jiyong composed, he had to beg Jiyong for days to give the music for him.

Literally, begging on his knees. His own best friend did that.

But in the end, Jiyong didn't reject the idea, he let go of such masterpiece because he cared about them.
However, there was one thing that all members were aware of, once Jiyong has decided on something, not even Seungri could change his mind.

“I'll marry you, Seungri. Legally.”

What did he mean by that?

He couldn't propose to someone after he told the person that he was just using them as a tool.

Did he have no sense at all?

Seungri did flutter and a bit shock by the revelation of course, but no, he would never agree on such thing, even when Jiyong was the one said that. The way the older man treated people was so wrong. He needed to learn communication properly. Everyone, every human, did have a feeling, like Jiyong. Even the small Kwon baby had one too.

But why?

Why did Jiyong leave them being confused like this?

Why didn't he clearly speak up his mind and make this matter simpler for Seungri's normal brain?

Not everybody was like Jiyong. Not everyone – if there’s any, to be honest – could guess what was inside that man's complicated mind.

“I don't understand.” Seungri mumbled.

“What don't you understand, maknae?” Youngbae asked. He was spoon-feeding Kwon baby who was pouting hard because when he woke up, he couldn't see his dada around, instead he saw the crowd of crazy samchons on his left and right.

They were currently eating in one of private restaurants Seungri knew near the resort.

Jiyong received a call back from Yang Hyunsuk himself, saying that if he didn't go back to Seoul immediately, he could say good bye to his job forever. YG has given him a red card, the highest warning for his artists if they were ed up too much. Jiyong was the first though. YG, despite his annoying attitude in managing his artists, was a forgiver. This time, Jiyong has done too much. Seungri thought YG must have lost the last little patience that has been left in him.

YG's money maker and golden boy had been created many troubles lately. Nobody would believe that Jiyong's position was threatened.

But, wasn’t that what he wanted?

Why would Seungri still care? He couldn't help, Jiyong was sick, he looked paler than before Seungri left him to the drugstore.

Seungri heaved a sigh.

“Jiyong hyung. He's too complicated. I give up.”

“I swear I'm going to punch that bastard the moment I see his face again.” Seunghyun grumbled, feeling mad at Jiyong for being so unprofessional and disgustingly arrogant. “Everyone does want freedom. Does he think we don't need that too? We are idols, that's the price we have to pay. We get popularity in exchange of our freedom and privacy. He has chosen this path since he was young, so why complaining now?”

“I'm afraid that isn't the freedom Jiyong wants.” Youngbae answered, he completely gave up feeding the baby and let Seungri continue the task.

"Momma, dada wee?" Kwon baby kept asking for his father, but Seungri ignored the question. The baby punched his shoulder repeatedly with his little paws.

“You must know something, right, Youngbae hyung?” Daesung who chose to be silent all the time spoke up. “I am confused as well as the rest of you. But I still refuse to believe that hyung is a total jerk. I mean, there must be reasons why he did this. Everything felt like a nice written drama in the beginning but with the bad and confusing ending at the end of the day. Did he really plan all of this, hyung?”

“No, he didn't. He takes advantage of the right momentum. That's all.” Youngbae looked at the confused faces around him before he continued. “He planned nothing at first, he purely took Kwon baby because he cared. All of this happened because of the circumstances he no longer could avoid.”

“Explain.” Seunghyun ordered.

Youngbae took a deep breath as he stole a glance at Seungri. The latter simply nodded, asking him to proceed.

“Promise me, guys. No matter what happens after today, please do not hate him. You can be angry at him, but aren't we a family? Besides, I, myself, have my own part in this mess.”

“What are you saying, hyung?" Daesung questioned.

“Jiyong only tried to protect me, so we planned and executed something unbeknown to you."

“It's on us to decide, Bae. Just spit everything already.” Seunghyun sipped his coffee as he grew increasingly impatient.

“Fine. From where do you want me to start?” Youngbae asked.

“I don't know, hyung. You tell me.” Seungri stated lowly, playing with Kwon baby small hands. The boy grew tired punching him so he refused to eat his meal now.

Youngbae smiled a little at them. He knew he needed to do some explaining before his best friend damaged this group more than he already did today.

“I keep this secret because he wants me too. Jiyong has been suffered a lot as an artist, but he doesn't hate it to be frank. He loves being GD and letting GD go is the toughest decision he ever made.”

“Well, we all can see that. He looks terrible lately.” Seunghyun responded, shrugging his broad shoulder in the process.

“Jiyong, he takes his role as the leader of the team seriously. I was threatened in the past, because I stayed too close to Jiyong. Before we debuted, someone proposed to Jiyong for marriage.” Youngbae explained when he got loud shocking gasped from the members.

“W-what?”

They had taken seat on the corner of this quiet restaurant, but they had to be careful for leaking unnecessary information about the leader. They didn't need unwanted and mischievous staff to hear and spread the words for money.

“He refused. He said he wanted to be an idol first. But sadly the man couldn't wait.” Youngbae said in a hushed tone.

“T-the man?” Seungri whispered.

So he wasn't the first man Jiyong had liked. Somehow this newly found fact bothered him.

“Im Jung Hwa. Kwon baby's father. That drunken man Seungri punched this afternoon.”

“W-what?” Maknae stuttered.

“You've got to be kidding me.” Daesung muttered.

“Jiyong, Hwayoung and Jung Hwa were supposed to be best friends in the past. They went to the same school. Hwayoung was an underground rapper, the reason Seunghyun knows her.”

“Yeah, she wasn't that good, but she wrote nice lyrics. That time, female rapper was rare, she's very famous in our circle, everyone went after her. She helped Jiyong a lot on his lyrics in the beginning, I guess.” Seunghyun made an expression of distate.

A minute passed in silence as the hyungs studied their maknae's reaction with the sudden facts.

"Momma –“ Kwon baby worriedly looked up, seeing his mother's troubled face that made him stop feeding the baby.

"That book –“ Seungri started.

“You mean the lyrics book?" Seungri nodded. "Jiyong's still keeping that because that was the first lyrics book he owned. Hwayoung gave it to him as the present for writing and composing his first song.

"Jung Hwa told me Hyunsuk challenged you to write your own lyrics." Hwayoung, a nice looking skinny girl said to the man with crooked teeth beside her.

"Yeah. He believes I can do more than singing or rapping. He said my voice is only in average level, I'm not as good as Youngbae in singing, nor do I in higher level than Seunghyun hyung's powerful rap. If I'm still in this level, I'll be nothing more than just a leader and back up singer or dancer in the group."

"Do you want me to help you?"

"You will?" Young Jiyong asked in delightful tone.

"Of course. Anything for Jiyongie." Hwayoung was rummaging her backpack, he pulled out a black book from it. She then grabbed a pen and write something before she gave them to Jiyong.

"From Bae Hwayoung for Kwon Jiyong." Jiyong read loudly. There was a small heart being drawn after his name.

"Write every word crosses your mind every time you think about specific theme."

"Will that help?"

"Trust me it will."

"Thanks, Hwayoung. You are the best." Jiyong beamed at her. He was just an innocent sixteen years old boy, he failed to notice the gleam inside Hwayoung's eyes when he said that.

“I don't know if you notice or not but Jiyong has been interested in male since he was young, his family knows that. He liked Jung Hwa, and vice versa. But Hwayoung liked Jiyong. She tended to do everything for Jiyong but our leader was too blinded by his attraction to the man. That was until Jiyong rejected Jung Hwa's proposal. He still wanted to keep the relationship though, but Hwayoung took Jung Hwa away from him."

Hwayoung was a nice energetic girl. Jiyong liked her a lot. He felt like he was having a little sister he could depend on and have fun with everytime he was with her. So when Hwayoung confessed to him, he didn't know what to do, he felt dejected after rejected the girl. 

He had no intention in coming out this early to his friend, but the thing he could do to not hurting Hwayoung more was to say he wasn't straight. He liked boys, and was currently in relationship with Jung Hwa, a son of South Korea's billionaire who happened to share the same feeling as him.

Sadly, he never thought he would be this wrong.

Hwayoung was disgusted by the news, Jiyong couldn't help but being sad and afraid at the same time. Sad, he lose one of the most important people in his life. Afraid that she would share Jiyong's unusual choice with the rest of students in this private school.

Jiyong told his fear to his boyfriend, Jung Hwa said he would protect Jiyong no matter what.

Jiyong should have not believed any sweet lies from people around him. The second mistake he made that time.

“Father wants me to marry someone early, as soon as I graduate high school.” Jiyong was taken a back with Jung Hwa words. “When I said I’m in a relationship, he said it’s fine. I can propose to my soulmate if I want. He isn't like some conservative parents in our country. He loves freedom of expression.”

“What do you mean?”

“Don't play dumb, Jagi. I'm asking for your hands. Don't worry about everything, I'll feed you well. Father wants me doing internship in one of the branches and at the same time taking business management in college.”

Jiyong was barely seventeen but has been thinking about many things already in his young brain. He told Youngbae, someone he found comfort besides Jung Hwa and Hwayoung, the next day.

“What about me, Jiyong? Aren't we becoming a group soon? Are you going to abandon me?”

“I'm not going to leave you, Bae. Don't worry. This is my dream too.”

Youngbae smiled. Jiyong smiled back. Jung Hwa abused Jiyong the next morning he rejected him. 

Losing ity in this early stage of his life wasn't a part of his dream. His mother was crying when she saw the bruises he got, that was the first time Jiyong saw his father looked like he wanted to murder people. He almost killed Jung Hwa if Jiyong didn't stop him.

Jiyong said he was okay. He loved Jung Hwa, he tried to protect this relationship as much as he could. He forgave easily.

However, when Jung Hwa showed up in front of YGE building and beat Youngbae up for saying such thing to Jiyong, the leader could no longer hold his fury back.

He punched Jung Hwa hard, despite he was smaller than the latter.

Nobody hurt Youngbae.

Nobody hurt his one and only true friend.

Both him and Youngbae got detention cleaning up all dance and recording studios every day for three months long.

Two months after Jung Hwa punched Youngbae, Jiyong saw him kissing with Hwayoung in the school hallway.

He was fine. He thought so, u