‘You keep pushing me while my eyes are half-covered’

You pulled the earbuds outs as the last Bell of first period rang and you were once more trapped in your study period. You always thought it was strange to have a study period in first period, but it seemed better than the alternative; science, history or worst of all, math. It was a period you could use to catch up on the homework you failed to do the night before and get in a little bit of studying before the quiz you would inevitably have in your third period. That teacher swears that she only gives pop quizzes. But there's nothing ‘pop’ about having a quiz daily at the beginning of the class and most of the material was stuff you hadn't covered yet. She was crazy and you were absolutely sure of it.

Your eyes moved to the front as the teacher stood from his desk. As he rose so did everyone else and you reluctantly joined. Running through the same mundane morning routine that just seemed to the life out of you, you were finally allowed to sit back down. With the instructions the same as always “study”, you plug your earbuds in and open up your chemistry textbook, your notebook open and posed, just ready to be written in. You were honestly thankful that music was allowed in the class because utter silence for nearly an hour would just drive you absolutely crazy.

Your fingers flew over the screen of your iPod, unlocking it and pulling up your music. You wanted to make sure it was on repeat of your new, current favorite song. It was by a group called JJ Project, aptly named for the two members that made up this group, Park Jinyoung and Im Jaebum. They had the singing voices of angels and their new single, Tomorrow, Today, was absolutely your favorite song. While many people could probably argue with you (and most likely would, knowing those crazy fans) that they had better songs, even in their fully formed group Got7, you have never heard a better song in your life. Mainly because the lyrics struck something deep within you. Feelings and confusion that you thought only you suffered from.

‘Somebody let me know, Tell me which way to go, Cuz I don’t, don’t, don’t know’

It was your senior year of high school. At the end of the year marked a big transition in your life. You were expected to go to college, find a major that would eventually lead you into your career. A career that would fully support you and whatever family you would have in the future. All the while, also having a social life to go and meet some nice boy and settle down with and eventually marry. Not to mention you were also expected to take care of your parents as they got older in life, since they spent 18 years of their life caring for you. At least you didn’t have siblings, but sometimes you wished you did. Maybe if you did, all the pressures of life wouldn’t be on your shoulders. You could share the responsibilities. Of course you would probably still be the first born and expected to care for them and be their role model. But maybe that wouldn’t have been so bad. At least you would have someone to talk to about your fears and worries in life.

Sure you had your parents, but would they really understand? Maybe, but as it was, they see life as a never ending routine. Wake up, study, pass exams, go to college, get a good career, make a lot of money, come home, eat and do it all over again. A never ending cycle like a robot. Up, work, down. Over and over like a mindless zombie and that was honestly a scary future to think about. You had your friends, and yes they were all going through the same things you were going through. Studying, exams, searching for colleges. But your friends somehow still bested you. Two of them were in the top 3% of the school with their scores. Your best friend having tested out of high school a year before due to her high scores on placement exams and was already in college. Another friend in your group could care less because in less than four months, she was going to be married to her high school sweetheart (who was three years older than her). He already had a secure job working with his father, but was going to school to get a degree and climb the corporate ladder. She needed to do absolutely nothing; her life was set.

And then there was you. You struggled day to day to finish your homework. Not because you had a tough life at home, or had to work after school. But because you hated school. You found it not only a waste of time but it was also very challenging for you. You never saw the need to be competitive and strive to be the best. You had absolutely no idea what you wanted to do with your life. Of course your parents knew what they wanted you to do with your life. But you wanted to make those choices, you didn’t want them to be made for you. And you didn’t want to make the choices that you thought were right, only to look back and wonder what your life would have been if you chose a different path. Would it be different? Was this the right choice? Should you go this way, or that way?

It was confusing and stress inducing. And the only solace you could seek was within your music. That’s why this song was so meaningful to you. It was like these people were in your head and could hear your struggle. Their song was about this, the struggle of choosing the right path in life without fear and regret that they chose the wrong way to go. So blind as to which was the right path for them, how could they make the right choice or answer the questions that life threw at them when they didn’t even know the answers themselves.

It was like your theme song; your life song. Tomorrow, Today. Where would you be tomorrow? How could you possibly know when you’re still living today? How could you possibly see into the future?

A heavy sigh left you as you laid your head down on the desk, eyes closing. You let your mind wander as you lost yourself in the song. Darkness surrounded you with a warm, welcoming embrace and you found yourself falling deeper and deeper into it. A gentle touch and a soft call of your name was pulling you from the embrace. You didn’t want to go, but the voice sounded so sweet, so soft, you couldn’t help but be curious as to who was calling you.

Your eyes opened slowly and they were flooded with light. But not the harsh light of the classroom you had been in. But a soft, natural light, which was strange to you. A soft groan left you as your eyes adjusted to the light for a moment, the large tree overhead finally taking shape and you wondered, where it came from. The sound of birds chirping also caught your attention and you were slowly becoming aware of the fact that you were outside. How and when did that happen? You were just in the classroom...weren’t you?

“Y/N.” You tilt your head back towards the voice and the face of the mysterious person suddenly comes into view. You have seen many handsome men before in your life, but none as handsome as this man. Such fair skin, amazing hair, gorgeous eyes and such plush lips. You swore you’ve seen him before, but you weren’t sure where. You also could swear that this was a dream, because honestly, how did you go from inside a classroom to outside under a tree? But that thought soon dissipated as the male smiled at you, his eyes crinkling as he did so and you thought it was honestly the cutest thing in the world. How could this man go from handsome to adorable in less than five seconds?

“Hey, are you awake? You went to sleep.” Sleep? Yeah, you remember going to sleep. Frowning, you stared at him for a moment before sitting up and looking around. It was an open grassy field with a beautiful view of the city out in the horizon. The sun was shining brightly above, making you feel nice and hot, but the occasional breeze came through to cool you off, making you feel warm and cozy. Turning your body, you realize your head been resting in his lap and judging from the items around you, he had been reading? Maybe this was some sort of picnic? There was a basket on the other side of him. “What’s wrong?” he asked quickly, worry suddenly etched on his face.

“I…” you trailed off, eyes once more taking in your surroundings, trying to make sense of all of this confusion. How? When? Where and why? Looking back at him, you let out a soft yet confused laugh. “This is going to sound crazy but I don’t know where I am. Or how I got here. Or who you are.” The words tumbled right out of your mouth and it was like a light bulb was in his mind. There was this strange look of understanding that crossed his features and he nodded slowly. This had to be a dream then. How could someone just seem to know? How could this guy just be so alright with what you said? You assume that you know him and you’re at least friends with him, if not something more. So how could he just be cool with the weird words that just left you? It’s not like you got hit in the head and went unconscious and now you have amnesia. Right?

“I get it.” he said and stood. He carefully placed his book in the basket and picked it up before holding out his hand, smiling once more at you. “Come with me.” he said. You were a little hesitant at first, to just take the hand of this random stranger, who was still so calm and collected about this whole thing! “Y/N, trust me.” Oh yeah, like you were simply going to just trust someone who told you to trust them. But something inside you told you to take his hand. So you did. Grasping it tightly, he pulled you up and just as suddenly as you found yourself in that field with him, your surroundings changed once more. Gone was the sunshine, the cool breeze and beautiful horizon. It was gloomy, overcast and you were standing at the end of a road. Before you were two signs, both arrows to let drivers know they could either go left or right. Two signs, one choice. Which way to go?

“I don’t get it.” you found yourself saying as you turned to stare at the male to your left, but he wasn’t there. Confused, you turned quickly to your right and he wasn’t there either. You turned in a circle, searching for the man that just been there, had just held your hand. But he was nowhere to be seen. You felt fear and panic start to set in. You were in a strange place, alone, with no guide to tell you what to do or how to get back. “Oh my god.” you whispered, hands moving to run through your hair as you exhaled slowly. Your eyes moved back to the signs and you slowly walked towards them. Looking to the left, you saw nothing but an empty road. Looking to the right, you saw the same thing. Two different paths, two different ways to go.

“How do I know which way is the right way?”

“Follow your heart.”

It was a soft voice, but you knew you had heard it before. It sounded exactly like the man that had just been with you. Now he was telling you to follow your heart? Well it was a little hard to do that when your mind kept coming up with scenarios of the worst case situation if you picked the wrong direction. How could you possibly pick and not know about the other way? You felt a soft, warm touch to your shoulder, the same you felt right before you had woken up. It was comforting and it silenced your brain long enough for your heart to take the lead and make your choice. Turning to the right, you stared at the road and nodded. This was the right path.

This was your path. You began walking with more confidence than you had ever felt before in your life. For once, you didn't feel lost. You didn't feel like every choice you made in your life was a mistake. You didn't feel like others were pushing you to make this choice. You made it this time. And it's the choice you were so proud to make.

As you walked down the road the skies grew darker and darker, but not once did you falter in your belief that this was the right choice. You kept walking until all that was around you faded to black and you were once more wrapped in the warm embrace of darkness.

“Y/N!”

Jolting awake, you looked around quickly as your earbuds fell from your ears. You stared up at your friend, her worried eyes scanning your face. “Are you alright? We're gonna be late for art class.” she said

Sitting up slowly, you looked around the familiar classroom and let out a sigh. A dream. It really had been just a dream. “Y/N?”

“Ah yeah. Sorry.” You said quickly and scrambled to grab your stuff and pack it in your bag. Standing, you smiled at her, before covering your mouth to stifle the loud yawn that left you. “Let's go.”

“If you say so, sleeping beauty. Have any good dreams?” she asked as she walked out of class with you.

“I wouldn't call it a good dream. But it as a dream.” You said with a shrug.

“Yeah? Tell me about it.”

“Ah...maybe later? I'm still trying to understand it myself.” You told her with a chuckle. You both made it to class with a few seconds to spare, the late bell ringing just as you both took your seat. After another mundane routine of greeting and instructions, you were left to work on your class project, a portrait of a person that you had yet to start because honestly, you had no idea who to draw. Until now.

Setting up the table easel, you attached the sketch paper and started working. Your hand moved effortlessly, sketching out each smooth and beautiful feature. Losing yourself in your sketch, you're just about done with it when you finally pull back to rest for a moment, your back screaming in relief.

“Wow! So that's who you've been drawing? That's the best sketch of Jinyoung I've ever seen.” your friend said in awe. Jinyoung? You sat there and looked at the sketch and you realized the male in your dream was indeed Jinyoung. This realization suddenly put the whole dream in perspective and you smiled to yourself.

“Follow your heart.” You whispered to yourself and grinned. That's exactly what you were going to do.

~*~Eight Months Later ~*~

For your graduation present, your parents got you tickets to a Got7 concert and a Got7 fanmeeting. They were so proud of you. You had turned around so quickly, getting better grades in school and you finally decided what you wanted to go to school for. While they weren't the biggest supports of an arts school, your national win in the art contest had all but proven to them your talent for drawing.

As you made your way down the table, getting your album signed by each member, you clutched tightly to your 1st place sketch of Jinyoung. It felt like forever and not that you weren't grateful to be able to see all the other members (Got7 was one of your favorite groups after all), you were dying to give this gift that the other members always eyed, wondering if it was theirs.

At last you reached Jinyoung and after the small greeting, you lifted up the drawing, pressed against a hard black cardboard back and laminated so nothing could ruin it. The 1st place ribbon was still attached to it and across the top read ‘Tomorrow, Today’. Jinyoung stared at it for a moment, marveling before accepting it with a gracious smile. Carefully he sat it next to him on the floor, leaning up against the chair so it wouldn't be trampled or stepped on.

“Thank you. It's beautiful.” he said. Simple words but they had you blushing. He would probably never understand how important that drawing was to you or the meaning behind it, but you did and knowing that he now had the source of your motivation and confidence, it made you happy. You were no longer lost and confused. You knew which path was yours and you were going to walk down it with your head held high and you were going to meet any forks in the road with confidence and follow your heart in making your decisions.

You watched as he leaned forward and uncapped his pen and started writing. You thought he was signing, but after a few seconds, his hands started making the large movements that signified his signature before he passed back the album. With a bow, you took it with a smile and started moving down to the last member. Looking down at the album, you read over the words careful.

‘Always follow your heart, Y/N. I'll always be rooting for you. Fighting~’

Brows furrowing, you quickly look back and stared at Jinyoung. He was looking back at you and gave a wink, which only added to the confusion you felt. It had all been a dream…

Right?