I'm bore..my mum went out for business weekend and I suppose to spend the day playing bowling with Yugyeom and Minhyuk but they cancelled.

Last night was fun for Untouchable gang.

We had great time eating and drinking at WannaOne restaurant.

I was giddy...damn I almost exposed my crush that night.

I been having hard time recently to stop my attention toward this person.

This person is one of my best friend.

My feeling is getting hard to control recently.

Ah. It's big problem. My mum is so strict.

She forbidden me to date until I finish my school.

She is also want me to date certain criteria of girl.

I don't want that.

Ah..It's hard to be raise only by mum.

I want to experience male figure in my life who can teach me to be a real man.

Ah..This is why I like Eunji dad.

He is one of the coolest man I have ever meet.

She is a lucky girl.

I wish I have a dad.. anyone..to fill this void. I even jealous of my friends who has a dad.

Daniel,Jimin,Kai dad seem ok..as long not Sehun dad..he isn't a good dad.

I knew how he made Sehun and his mum suffer.

Sehun finally able to tell us on Eunji 17 th birthday.. which we celebrate in her favourite place,the car wreck yard,belong to Jung Yonghwa,... her weird older cousin.

We drank and playing the truth and dare game as Jimin idea.

And we became closer after.

I will not dare to wrecked this valuable friendship.

I just have to hide and push down that feeling.

Damn it...it's my first love.

I don't know when my feelings become this uncontrollable ...but I got the inkling..maybe since that night...that fateful night...when everything about that person made my heart beat unnormal. It start as admiration...and growing to something more meaningful than I ever want.

I experienced first love but can't pursue it. I'm a coward. I am afraid of the consequence.

I need to strength my heart and don't think about that person like this...it's dangerous..it's a dead end.

I don't think that person will be attracted to me. I need to realise that this feeling is wrong...It's going to mess us up. I have to start looking for someone else before my heart will broken to pieces. 

Maybe I should accept Yerin unrelenting chase. She is my no.1 die hard fans. But..nah...too much hassle..My mum wish and my own heart not allowed me to do that.

Enough about my stupid unrequited and gone nowhere love tragic. I want to spend my weekend with my friends.

I prefer being with that person I can't have than be bore to death..seen the smile and the scent ...are enough to make me slightly happy.

I think I will see Eunji...I think she is free today. Daniel phone is busy.

I can deliver the video game her twin brother requested.

Yep. It much fun to go to her home and talking with plenty of male role model like her dad and brother,plus hanging with the best girl in whole world beside my mum.

Mmm.. Sh