Chapter 33: What My Heart Tells Me To Do.

“Where's Yongguk?” Daehyun said loudly as he finished the last pancake in the fridge.

   Yongguk and Himchan took Ganji for a walk YESTERDAY. Right now was TODAY and there was no sign of them. Daehyun thought to call, but then he heard the door to the apartment crack open. He jumped out of his seat and rushed to the hall to find Himchan coming in, followed by Yongguk with Ganji sheltered in a pink blanket.

    “Oh my God, I've missed you so much!!!” Daehyun screamed of excitement.

    “Me too!!!” Himchan spread his arms out, waiting for Daehyun’s hug, but the younger passed him by and took Ganji from Yongguk's arms and hugged him tightly.

    “I love you, my baby” Daehyun Eskimo kissed Ganji as the others observed the bruises on his face in shock.

    “What happened to your face?!” Himchan asked, upset.

    “Nothing” Daehyun lowered his head and put the blanket away from Ganji to see better his face, but what he saw left him speechless. Ganji’s beautiful hair was gone, he had been shaved down, he was bald, , no hair left “What the... What... Where's Ganji beautiful fur? I can feel his ribs!!!” Daehyun patted his dog's side getting the creeps “Why is he…?”

    “We groomed him a little” Himchan said.

    “A little? There's no hair anywhere!!!”

    “Look on the bright side, you won't have to pick up the hair off the floor anymore. There won’t be hair on the couch, on the bed...”

    “What. Did. You. Do. To. My. Ganji?!!!”

    “It's a funny story” Himchan said “And Yongguk will tell you”

    “We agreed to tell him together” Yongguk said.

    “I don't remember that” Himchan walked backwards towards the door “Besides, I don't want to steal your thunder… I know how much you love to tell a good story”

    “I don't” Yongguk made a face.

    “Sorry, I have work, I'm late. See you when I see you, bye” Himchan said and literally ran off.

    “I'm waiting” Daehyun glared at Yongguk and petted Ganji like a Bond villain.

    “Like Himchan said... It's a funny story...” Yongguk laughed nervously as he wished to run off too.

Flashback

It was 10:00 p.m., the malls were supposed to be closed, but nope. Himchan knew a mall that was open 24/7. He planned to go to every store and Yongguk had to follow, after all, he was the “carry all the shopping bags” guy.

    “Gucci will release a new suitcase in a few hours” Himchan checked on his phone “There's a Gucci store upstairs. If I wait, maybe I'll be one of the first people in Korea to get one!!!” he said, jumping for joy “Isn't fantastic?!!!” he turned around and waited for Yongguk's reply.

    “To be honest, I’m not into fashion. I know nothing about brands, designers, suitcases...”

    “Who cares? I'm into you and I want to know everything about you!!!”

    “What?”

    “Nothing” Himchan averted his eyes quickly. He was single and didn't date in years and didn't want to freak the bodyguard out, so he tried to calm himself down “Are you hungry? There's an amazing BBQ restaurant by entrance 8. We can have dinner while we wait for Gucci...”

    “I'm not hungry”

    “We’ve been here for hours... You’re sure you aren't hungry? It's on me!!! I'll pay!!! If you don't like BBQ, there's a sushi bar on the 3rd floor, Thai food on the 2, a Chinese restaurant across the street, I saw a McDonald’s...”

    “I'm sure, I'm not hungry”

    “So you don't like fashion or eating... Is there anything you want?”

    “Go home”

    “But I want that Gucci suitcase, I want to be one of the first to get it!!!” Himchan almost cried like a baby, that's why he didn't have a boyfriend, most guys hated crybabies. It was a miracle that Yongguk didn’t bolt yet.  

    “Fine” Yongguk said “You buy that and we leave”

    “It's a promise!!!” Himchan showed him his little finger in order to make a pinky promise, but Yongguk just dead stared at him “You’re really a serious guy…” Himchan said and got no answer “Uuhhh… I need to use the restroom…”   

    “I'll wait over there” Yongguk pointed to a bench surrounded by trees.  

    “Thanks?” Himchan said and left.

Yongguk waited Himchan for hours. The stylist left around 10:20 p.m. and now was 1:00 am!!! He started to worry, maybe something bad happened to him on his way to the bath or on his way back. Yongguk got up from the bench and grabbed the shopping bags, ready to go in search of Himchan. However, the pink-haired man showed up out of the blue with a bubble tea in his right hand and a suitcase in his left.

    “You're ok?” Yongguk asked in confusion.

    “I'm more than ok!!!” Himchan said “See? My Gucci suitcase!!! And since I was one of the first, they gifted me a wallet. I already have that one though...” Himchan pouted “I'll give it to Yoo Youngjae for Christmas” he shrugged and noticed how worried Yongguk looked “Are you ok?”

    “No. I was worried sick about you. I thought something bad happened to you”

    “It's the sweetest thing I've ever heard” Himchan covered his mouth in surprise “But why were you worried?”

    “You went to the bathroom for hours”

    “Oh... That... You'll see... I just took like two minutes in the bathroom. But on my way back I bumped into an Italian restaurant, I didn’t know there's an Italian here. So I went in. I was so hungry, I ordered pasta with pork, white fish, Tuscan salad and cliché tiramisu as dessert... and after my belly was full I remembered you were waiting here...”

    “You had forgotten about me?”

    “Sorry, I'm forgetful when I'm hungry” Himchan said “Anyway, I was coming here when I found a food cart that sells bubble tea. I love bubble tea, unlike Daehyun. Whatever, I bought this one. It’s blended with peach, apple, watermelon, strawberries, Oreo... You want a sip?”

    “No” Yongguk said, half shocked, half disappointed with himself for worrying about someone so self-centered and shallow like the younger.

    “Your loss, it's the best bubble tea I’ve had” Himchan shrugged and continued telling his story “Suddenly my alarm sounded, I set one to remind me I have to get my Gucci” he pointed to his suitcase “So I went straight to the store and bought it. I almost didn't, there were so many people. I’m not surprised though, this suitcase is beautiful”

    “Now that you got that, can we go home?”

    “But we haven't been to that Versace store or that Armani...”

    “Look, if you want to stay, fine. But I'm going”

    “If you do that, who will carry my bags? I can't, I'm carrying this bubble tea and this suitcase”

    “Go with me, I think you’ve done too much shopping”

    “There’s no such thing as too much shopping” Himchan said, horrified “If it were me I’d live here”

    Yongguk rolled his eyes and started walking to the exit.

    “Wait, wait!!!” Himchan ran after him “I’ll go with you!!! I’ll go with you!!!” the pink-haired man got in Yongguk’s way making him stop “I go, but you carry this. It’s gorgeous…and heavy” he gave him the suitcase and started walking ahead as the bodyguard struggled with thousands of shopping bags and, now, the suitcase.

    Himchan reached the exit, but before stepping out, he turned around abruptly and frowned at the older.

    “Where's Ganji?”

    “He's with you”

    “Me? Where?” The only thing in Himchan’s hands was the bubble tea.

    “Well, he isn’t with me. I haven’t seen him since...”

    They exchanged glances, Yongguk couldn’t remember the last time he saw Ganji.

    “Oh my gosh!!! You lost him!!!” Himchan said.

    “WE lost him”

    “YOU lost him!!! Daehyun left you that dog, I just popped up!!! Oh my gosh, he won’t care!!! He’ll kill us both!!! I don't want to die so young!!! I'm not 30 yet!!! I don't care what the Korean calendar says!!! I'm young and stunning!!! I haven’t got the chance to post a photo of my Gucci suitcase on Instagram yet!!!”

    “I don't want to die in Daehyun's calloused hands!!! Those stupid cameras give calluses!!!” Himchan said “My dream is to die choked with a Valentino's scarf, stab by Jimmy Choo’s heels, swallowed by D&G jackets, drowned by Chanel No. 5, buried in Calvin Klein’s briefs... with Calvin Klein’s models...”

    “You're overeating” Yongguk said “Just calm down and...”

    “I think there's a pet store on the fifth floor. We can buy a dog that looks like a sheep, Daehyun won’t know the difference. If he says it’s not Ganji, we say it is and then he'll have to go with it. It's our word against his...”

    “Or we can check the security cameras to see where Ganji is” Yongguk pointed at the camera upon them.

End Flashback

“So far all I’ve heard is Himchan is a drama queen” Daehyun said, rising his eyebrow.

    “I’m going there, just wait” Yongguk said “The security guys let me look at the cameras without asking many questions, after all, I’m a cop. Actually I’m a detec…” Yongguk continued with his story as Daehyun gave him the stink eye “It seems we lost Ganji at Moschino while Himchan tried on some boots. Ganji got inside an old lady’s shopping bag, and she went to the BBQ restaurant. Ganji followed the aroma from the kitchen, he fell into a trash can, the cleaning lady didn’t see him and took out the garbage”

    “A garbage truck picked up the trash… I got the license plate and followed the truck to a dumpster outside Seoul… and Himchan and me spent hours looking for Ganji… I found him chewing on a flip-flop. He was covered in honey and there were pieces of gum stuck to his back, belly and paws… So we took him back to the 24/7 mall. The clerk at the pet shop said it was better to shave him than to bath him…” 

    “You two are monsters!!! I'll never leave Ganji with you two monsters never ever again!!!”

    Yongguk was a very stoic guy, but at that moment, he was scared and the younger saw it.

    “Sorry. I had a very long and awful night”

    “I can see” Yongguk studied the bruises on his face “What happened?”

    “I got into a fight with my cousin ‘cause he cheated on the girl I like. We were taken to the police station. The officer that arrested me told me I could make a phone call, so I called Youngjae and he didn’t show up until after Natalie did… I don’t want to talk about that. It was the longest night of my life, I thought I'd rot in jail”

    “Why didn’t you call me? I could’ve got you out in a flash, and without charges”

    “I know. But when the officer told me to call someone, I only could think about Youngjae. I just wanted to see him, like he could make everything better… I don’t know what I was thinking. I’m really stupid. Next time I’m arrested, I call you”

    “Next time?”

    “Of course I don’t want a next time, but if that happens, I call you. I really don’t know why I called Youngjae. The officer handed me the phone and I just started dialing his number. I couldn’t think of anybody but him” Daehyun said, wrapping Ganji with the blanket, he didn’t want him to catch a cold now that he was .

    “Remember that night you wanted to kill me?”

    “I didn’t want to kill you”

    “I thought you wanted to” Daehyun said “As I thought I was going to be murdered by you, the only person I could think about was Youngjae… People say when you’re about to die, you see your life pass by. I only could see him… and I didn’t want to die because that means I couldn't see him anymore”

    “It sounds like...” Yongguk was about to say something too personal, so he decided to shut up.

    “It sounds like what?”

    “Nothing”

    “You have to finish your sentence”

    “It's nothing”

    “Say it, say what you were about to say”

    “I don’t want to. I don’t even know you that well, so I’ll keep my opinion...”

    “Come on!!! You can’t say something and then not”

    “Well…” Yongguk gulped, he just threw himself in the lion's mouth “You're always thinking about Youngjae… It sounds like you’re in love with him” Yongguk thought Daehyun was going to punch him, but the photographer burst in laugh instead.

    “Oh, Yongguk hyung, you’re crazy! I just told you I got into a fight for a girl I like, so how can you say I’m in love with him?”

    “I told you I don’t know you well, I may be wrong”

    “You are wrong. People can’t love more than one person at a time”

    “People can. There are thousands of books, dramas, songs, plays, movies about love triangles”

    “Not in my case” Daehyun shook his head “There’s only one person I love and it’s not him. I’m not even gay. So how can I have feelings for him? How, hyung, tell me how?”

    “Gay, straight, bi, panual are labels… All the hearts are the same and you can’t tell your heart who to fall in love with” Yongguk said “Trust me, you have no control over who to love. You can be a man and love a woman and then love a man and then love a woman… or hate her and then hate him… I’ve been there. Just be extra careful in your case”

    “Why?” Daehyun wrinkled his brow and pouted.

    “There’s a drug ring going on Ego and I don’t know who X is yet. It may be Youngjae, so be careful if you have feelings for him…”

    “Thank your for your concern… and talk. But I’m ok. I don’t have feelings whatsoever for him…”

as I write I think of 2016 daejae. daehyun used to be very thin, like 138 pounds, he said that...

can you tell me what video is this?