I froze there looking at the person dressed in all black from his shoes until his cap covering his face. But, I knew exactly that it was him just from his now-skinny-posture.
It almost felt like dreaming because he was there, as I wished before.

With me now facing him, he let his phone ringing with the default ringtone you usually have when you forget to switch silent mode on, not even move at all to take his phone. He didn't seem like answering my call or rejecting it, just stood there as if he could stare at me from the dark.

I felt warm on my cheeks because of the blood ran so fast from my heart to all of my body when I tried to speak up.

"Do Kyungsoo, how are you tonight?"

I talked to the phone even if he hadn't answered it, but my hand still positioned my phone on my right ear, even though he could clearly hear my voice through the air. 

"I just want to know... if you're doing fine. I know you have the strongest heart and physique, but you still have to eat your dinner so you don't lose weight so much like that. Don't forget your vitamins too. Don't hurt yourself so much because it hurts your mom, and people who love you."

It does hurt me, too, seeing you endure it all alone.

Somehow, those words were kept inside because I was so weak to utter it all, moreover because he didn't respond me at all and I was unable to know what reaction behind the shadow on his face.

"The words I told you not to talk to me again,
I wish I could take it all back,
and say the one you always wanted from me instead. 
If only you give me the chance to...."

I was running out of time before I finished my words when his phone stopped ringing. 

He didn't say a word and walked towards me instead. I watched him doing so, eyes glued to his every move, but he bumped his shoulder with mine when he walked passing me without saying anything.

"I won't give up on you, Do Kyungsoo." 

I slipped those words out of my mouth, enduring a sharp pain on my chest.

"Just like you who didn't give up on me before."

Tears suddenly fell upon my cheeks as I turned my body and seeing him continued walking, and creating the distance even farther between us. But, I couldn't move my feet to run after him, asking him to stay beside me like before. Like those time I wasted so carelessly before.

But I believed that he heard my every words so clearly.

And I believed that he still cared about me, as what he had shown me tonight,

That he was always there, watching me without me knowing these all time.

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He stood up as I sat next to him. From his face I could see that he was annoyed with my presence. He was going to take his bag and move to another empty seat when I grabbed his hand.

"Please, Kyungsoo-ya..."

Jang seosangnim came into the class even before the bell even rang, like usual. That made him sat again on his seat, and his hand letting go off of mine. After we said our greeting to Jang seosangnim, we learned biology like other time.

Not until the class finished, our homeroom teacher who is also our literature teacher, Cho Ara seosangnim excused Do Kyungsoo to go to the teacher office. He let out a heavy breath before he stood up and followed her lead to go out of the class.

I was curious what happened to him for the rest of the class. I thought every way possible to find out what happened with him in the office. It probably because of his grades too.

"Jang seosangnim, may I help you to carry this book to the office?"

"That's very nice of you. Be careful, it's heavy."

"Don't worry, I am strong enough, seosangnim."

I told him and brought the exercise book of my classmates. It was heavy as hell, but I should endure it somehow. Just to see what happened with Do Kyungsoo.

As I entered the room and followed Jang seosangnim to his desk, I could see through the glass, that Kyungsoo was with his mom doing some counseling with Cho seosangnim. I was relaxed because there was Eommonim with him, so there was nothing to worry about.

"Your grades are improving, Han Sora. Keep it well."
"Thank you, Seosangnim."

Actually I study harder lately, to help him with his grades, later if I had a chance to talk to him again. His schedule was very tight so he couldn't had an enough time to study for the final exam.

"What are you seeing to?" Asked him when I was busy seeing at the counseling room.

"Ah, Do Kyungsoo... That punk is really worrysome. His grades are falling in all subjects. I wonder how he manage to face the final exam this year. You guys should make his mind back on track again."

"Uh... We'll try, seosangnim."

As they finished their talking and got ready to go out of the room, I excused myself from Jang seosangnim to leave. I wanted to greet Eommonim as she got out of the room at least. 

"Good morning, Eommonim, Seosangnim."

"Good morning, Han Sora. What are you doing here?" asked Eommonim who was as suprised as her son to see me there.

"Just helping my teacher to carry the books." 

"Well i's a perfect timing for you, Han Sora. I was going to call you for the next counseling session."

Cho seosangnim told me and made the three of us looked confused at her.

"For what matter, seosangnim?"

"A matter requested by your guardian. You should wait inside for them to come."

"What guardian, seosangnim? I have none."

"Huh? They told me they was they are the substitutes of your parents, Mr. Park Junhyun and Ms. Han Hyu Joo."

My heart skipped a beat when I heard those names. They were really coming. Now, here, where I couldn't hide from them anymore.
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"We both know all you did these whole time, Han Sora."

"Where you live, where you are going to school, even where you had your part-time job."

"I joined the partnership of the shop, you could be the boss there, why burden your self being the clerk?"

They spoke when they took me home right after the counseling session with Cho Ara seosangnim. I never knew that they joined the school committee, they also donated for some school projects, and even gave shares to the cafe I worked in. They knew everything about me these whole time, even when I tried as much as I can to hide from them.

Actually, they were never been harm to me. At the opposite, they loved me so much, just like their own daughter.

It's because my aunt, Han Hyu Joo, my father's sister who always spending time with me when I was kid. When I was four, she got married to her husband, which was a very rich korean business man who lived in United States, so she moved there since then. I heard the news later, that she had a cancer and undergone a surgery so they never had any chance to have a child.

My mother was the only child of her family, and she was also an orphan when she was married to my father, who only had a sister. My grandfather passed away when I wasn't born yet, and so did my grandmother when I was 10. Leaving me all alone, when I also lost my parents at that accident 2 years ago.

As they heard about the news, they straightly came to Seoul to take care of me for some time. My aunt was beside me all the time, while her husband sometimes went home to States to manage his business. Because it was too hard going back and forth from States to Seoul all the time, they finally told me their idea. The idea that made me hate them since then.

Adoption.

Being in 10 years marriage with no possibility of having a child, of course made them missing something out of their happiness. 

Therefore, they asked me to be their legal child through adoption, with one condition, I should go with them, to their home, in United States.
I was still drawn in agony of losing my family back then, although their love to me was undeniable. I never agreed to  the idea. Not even until now.

"You live in that small apartment, working hard, while you can easily go with us home, and have a better life. That's not right, Han Sora."

"Just go with us, Sora-ya. This time we will not let you suffered any more."

"I don't want to."

"Please, you know we love you, we always do. Just try to love your own self. You deserve to be happy again."

"I am fine. Just leave me alone and go back to States!"

"There is no other excuse anymore, Han Sora. As we said before, this year would be the last year you stay in Seoul. Now, we are working on the legal paperwork for you to go aboard."

"I will never go with you! I hate you both!"

I tried to unlock the door roughly to escape my self. That made my uncle stop the car to prevent me doing some foolish things.

"Just live the rest of your highschool happily before we leave, Han Sora."

I went out of the car and ran away as far as I could go. I was aware of the dropping tears from my eyes as I ran, but I didn't care at all. When it's far enough, I slowed down and catched my breath. I wiped the tears on my cheeks and inhaled longer to ease my heat beats.

Eomma, Appa... I miss you.

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I skipped school the next day, and the day after. I didn't go to the cafe as well, leaving Hyerim eonni in questions through her text and missed calls which I didn't respond to any of them. Besides, it was raining cats and dogs out there. I could make up reason telling that I was sick for this weekend.

I didn't have any will to leave my bed, hiding in my blanket, and skipped meals for two days. My eyes had probably been swollen because of the tears I couldn't stop flowing down. But that made me feeling a little better. Rather than going out there and meeting people.

I didn't realize it before, but all the music in my playlist was all ballad songs just to fit the atmosphere in my room, except one.

It's his demo once again.

I didn't call him again, nor sending texts. I thought it was my break time. I didn't feel like wanting him know what happened to me, and what will happen as our highschool ends. Just imagining the probability of it is enough to make me gloomy all night.

After dressed in my pajama, and drank some water, I switched the lamp off and got back to my bed and took my blanket until it covered all of me. 

I was seeing the photos in my gallery, most of them was me and my family while the music playing on my headset. 

There was a picture of me and my parents in a barbeque stall, we looked so happy with me being feed by my father while my mom grilled the meat.
I always like eating meat wrapped with lettuce. At least once, where they always made me my favorite meat meals.

The next image was the day when the accident happened. I took a photo of them both, wearing their summer beach hats and sunglasses. 
I remembered, that day they asked me to go with them to the beach and stayed there at the weekend, but I refused because I wanted to go the party with my friends.

My mom made a box of kimbap for me to eat while they go. She said it was enough for two days if I ate it normally. I was carrying the luggage and kissing them on cheeks before they left. That time, I didn't know, that it was the last time I could ever be with them.

I was wiping my tears once again, and massaging my head a little because I started to feel dizzy. I was stopping the playlist when my phone buzzed because of a call.

A call from KyungsooV.

It felt like the thump sound in my chest was so loud, so I could hear it in my ear. I was there staring at my phone screen, still confused whether I was already dreaming or not. At the end, I managed to hit the accept button as I uncovered my blanket and sat on my bed.

"Kyungsoo-ya?"

There was no reply from the other line, but I could hear some noise.

"I am going crazy."

His voice was deep and husky, sending shivers on my spine. I was paying attention to his words carefully and didn't answer it so hurriedly.

"I wanna see you, I wanna hug you, I want to touch you."

My heart beat faster as I heard those words until I felt like I had been charged up because of the blood runs fast in every artery I had.

"The first snow is falling outside, Han Sora. It's getting colder."

"Where are you now?"

I was panicked a little as I switched the light on, and getting ready to go out coming to him.

"Look outside."

I was attempting to open my windows first, and when I succeeded, I could see him looking straight to me still with his phone on his ear, with snow falling lightly from above. His huge eyes were reflecting the light from the lamp street, making them sparkled so beautifully between the falling snow.

"Can you come down here?" 

Asked him with a deeper voice and a little shake in his voice.

I didn't answer it and rushed downstairs instead. As I opened the door, the winter breeze was striking and sending sudden cold to my body.
I was approaching him slowly, but I couldn't control my steps which improving the speed as I tried to hug him. .

Then finally I could feel his warmth inside his hug. 

I stayed there for a moment, and ended up crying silently on his shoulder. 

"I missed you, Do Kyungsoo." I whispered.

His left hand tightened the hug, and his right hand keep my head still and my hair a couple times.

"I missed your calls too."

As I heard his answer, I punched his shoulder with my right hand, a couple time until we broke the hug.

"Why don't you answer any of it? You know I was seriously worrying you."

He chuckled when his hand stopped mine from punching him again.

"You said you won't give up on me, so I just enjoyed seeing that."

"Ya! You are really!"

He grabbed my waist and took me closer to him. His eyes now searching for mine, and when our eyes met, he tried to kiss me. Spontaneously, I closed my eyes hiding my nervousness.

.
Then, a kiss landed on my forehead.

Softly, and stayed there for a moment.

My spine shivered and I could feel butterflies in my stomach because of an electric shock from his touch.
 

"Gomawo, Sora-ya."

I was frozen and blinked my eyes a couple time seeing at him awkwardly when I opened my eyes, feeling my cheeks burned from embarrassment.

Did he just kissed me? Well, even if it's on my forehead, it's still a kiss right? Then, it's my first kiss from a boy.

"Oooh.. my head hurts somehow."

I said while I supported my head with my own hand.

He laughed hearing my reply. But his laughter faded away as I felt like losing my power and collapsed on his arms instead. I could hear his fade sound calling my name over and over again before everything became black.

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I was awaken in a hospital room like.

He was beside me, sleeping with his head laying on my bed while his body was sitting on the chair beside the bed. His fingers intertwined with my right hands. I broke the connection and found an infusion tube planted on my artery. I his thick, and fluffy hair which made him awaken too.

"You've wake up?"

He asked with a hoarse voice while widened his eyes and checked my condition by feeling the heat on my forehead.

"I'm okay."

"You just blackout after I kissed you before. Don't you dare saying okay."

I laughed a little seeing him worried me that much.

"Doctor said you had malnutrition. You told me to eat my dinner while you skipped meals for days? Han Sora, you are really bad."

"I wasn't hungry at all though."

"Stop talking, you should get some rest if you want to go home tomorrow."

He scolded me and fixed my blanket. I positioned my self to sleep with me facing him.

"Lay your head here like before, Kyungsoo-ya."

He did what I said and we spent time seeing into each other's eyes. It was so peaceful seeing into his eyes, wondering how beautiful he is with those eyes, that thick eyebrows, his nose, and his plump lips which made some shy smile that brought me into smiling too.

"Just before, your aunt and uncle came here to check your condition."

His saying made me widened my eyes and wondered how they can come here.

"You met them?"

I asked him in disbelief.

"Yes. I will take care of you, Han Sora.  I will make you happy."

Just now, I wondered what they talked to him before.