WARNING – angst, mentions of death and blood, slight fluff (please read at your own risk)

---

No words were exchanged when she got into the car. Both of them simply leaned forward until their lips connected in a smooth dance.  If there was anyone there to witness the moment, no one would doubt their love for one another. Adoration shone out of his face as he displayed that special smile for her; a smile only reserved for her.

“Brian what are you staring at? Start the car!”

“Sorry. But you know how you can’t take your eyes off something so exquisitely beautiful? That’s what happening right now.” He then picked up her left hand and kissed her fingers, smiling even wider when his lips came into contact with the silver band, the one that indicated that they were each other’s for all eternity. She, on the other hand, blushed furiously at her fiancé. He made her feel this special all the time but she could still never get used to it.

“Get ready, tonight’s going to be really special.”

“I don’t know if I should be surprised or afraid of your surprises.”

“What? Come on, they’re not that bad.”

“In my opinion honey, they can be pretty bad sometimes.”

As he drove, they playfully bantered back and forth, sometimes about their past, sometimes about their future.

No one saw it coming.

Neither of them saw it coming.

By the time he noticed, the headlights of the car in front was already blinding him and then the sickening impact came. The quiet surrounding erupted into a deafening cacophony all around him.

The sound of glass breaking,

The horrible screech of metal colliding against metal,

But worst of all,

The sickening thud of a body hitting the hard gravel below.

When the sounds faded away and all that was left was the hydraulic hiss of the machines beneath his and the ticking of the car that was in sync with the flashing of the car headlights, that’s when the smell hit.

The thick coppery smell of blood that was rapidly flowing down his face assaulted his senses and from where his eyes were positioned, he could see a steady pool forming around his face. Lifting his eyes up, realisation hit him that the seat beside him was empty. Before the highly vicious liquid threatened to glue his eyes shut, he lifted his eyes with much difficulty, spotting the figure lying on the floor metres away from him, her limbs sticking out in an unnatural fashion, the blood pooling around her getting larger and larger as the seconds pass.

Save her… please…

Stretching his arm out, he tried to reach out to her, to hold onto her. His dying wish was simply to keep her alive, and that was the last thought on his mind before he was dragged into darkness.

-

This is wrong, why can I feel? Why can I hear? Why I can see…?

His senses slowly come back to him. First, he could feel the soft linen of the sheet underneath his palms. They feel rougher, not like what he had back home. Next, he could hear the high-pitched beeping of the monitors next to him that seemed to be in sync with his breathing and heartbeat. Lastly, the moment he cracked his eyes open, the bright fluorescent lights piercing his sensitive eyes. Letting out a low groan, he managed to stir someone sitting by his bed and he briefly caught a glimpse of blonde hair before that person was out of the door.

For the next 20 minutes, he was prodded and thoroughly checked by a team of doctors. As his mind became capable of thinking once more, questions began to form and one thing led to another.

Why am I in a hospital? Car crash… I think… Who was I with when that happened?

Then, the flashbacks happened so quickly he was nearly knocked out from the intensity of them. He remembered the blinding white lights, all the blood and seeing her lie on the ground. Catching onto the head doctor’s wrist like a madman, he demanded answers from all of them.

“Where’s Grace?”

Their silence made his voice die in his throat but it was the look on their faces that made him wish that someone would hand him a gun so that he could die instead. He knew that look. It was the same look the doctors gave him so many years ago. He was 14, a sick and pale boy sitting outside the surgery room when the doctors came out, gave him that pained expression and told him that both his parents were gone.  The last he saw of them was when they lowered the twin black caskets into the cold, hard ground and forever they disappeared from his life. He looked at Jae for confirmation, but even his best friend couldn’t look him in the eyes. He released the doctor’s wrist from his grip and when the pain hit, that’s when he went into hysteria, ripping tubes out of him and screaming his head off. Before he could cause further damage, they knocked him out and he was once again consumed by the deep darkness.

-

Brian was the perfect example of a man whom has lost his will to live. He was trapped in his own self-destructive thinking, responding to no one at all. The pain cut even deeper into his soul when her parents blamed him for killing her.

“You killed her, leave!”

“Murderer, we don’t need you here.”

“Why did you take her away from us?”

Even though he was still half-covered in bandages, they showed him no mercy, hurling accusations at him, pounding their fists into his body and filling his ears with their horrible wails of sorrow when his inner demons already tortured him enough daily. Jae had to physically drag him away from them before he would leave. Ever since that day, he has not contacted with her family at all. They won’t even let him know where they laid her to rest.

As for his own well-being, he could care less. He stopped taking his medication and didn’t turn up for a single therapy session. Eventually, the hospital stopped calling and for good measure, he plugged out his landline so no one could ever bother him again. He let his hair grow long and steady stubbles began to form on his face. He let his house fall into dilapidation, the abandoned exterior a reflection of its owner whom has already abandoned himself. He also lost his job after punching a superior. Not like he cared anyways, what’s the use of living when the world has already taken all that he loved from him? The only reason he was kept alive was because of Jae. Everyday, Jae would come over to drop off food for Brian and cook a meal sometimes but the next day when he came back, the food would go untouched, an ants infestation happening in the kitchen. Brian was his best friend yes, and it hurt him to see him in such a state but Jae was only human, a human with his limits.

Seeing Brian staring at his food again, Jae couldn’t stop the rage bursting out of him. Throwing the cloth into the sink, he finally lashed out.

“That’s it Brian, you’re getting out of the house.”

Dragging him by the collar, Jae dragged him out of the house before hurling him down onto the carpet of grass that was now strewn with years of decayed leaves.

“Tell me Brian, what’s going to make you pick up your life again? I can’t keep babysitting you! We’ve had this talk before; I’ll let you grieve but I think it’s enough. It’s been over a year, can you at least make an effort to live again?”

All Brian did was stare at Jae’s basketball shoes.

“Fine. Have fun living like this. Until you’re ready to face the world again, don’t contact me.” This time, there was no hint of joke in his voice. Turning on his heels, Jae left and that was the last Brian saw of him. When he finally stood up from the ground, that’s when he first saw you. Hair done up in a messy bun, snuggly wrapped in a sweater and comfy track pants. Your cheeks were dusted light pink from all the hauling you had to do. Judging by the number of large cartons stacked outside your house, you were going to be his new neighbour for a long time.  Even as he slammed the door shut, you were still staring at him, wondering what your new neighbour’s deal.

-

The orange hues of autumn slowly gave way to the icy blue winter and with the electricity supply cut off, Brian was freezing off in his house and the primal instinct to keep oneself alive began to kick in. For the rest of the day, his body moved on its own, hitting the barber, grocery store and town council to get his house running again. By the time he winded up right outside your house ready to cross the street to reach his own, he was thoroughly exhausted. A year of neglect has obviously left his body in a terrible state. So of course, when the first snowball hits him, it takes him awhile to register the cold seeping through this shirt. When he turns, ready to growl at that idiot that had the audacity to bother him, he was clearly surprised when he saw you still smiling, clearly unfazed by the hostile look on his face.

“Hey neighbour! Lighten up a little! Join me for a snowball fight?”

When he stares at you from his spot unmoving, you literally run to drag him onto your lawn, before placing a snowball in his head.

“Now you can throw it!” You beamed at him even though he was staring at you with the most incredulous look.

I don’t even know her, why should I play along with her games?

In an attempt to scare you off, he decided to be as heartless as he can be. Staring at you dead in the eye, he dropped the snowball you passed him to the ground before swiftly turning on his heels. That’s when the second one hits him square on the back of his head. As though someone had lit up the match of competitiveness in him, he decided to launch an attack on you and this fight went on for hours outside your house before both of you collapsed onto the thick carpet of snow, making snow angels on the ground.

“That wasn’t so bad was it Mr Neighbour?”

“No, that wasn’t bad at all.”

“See, that’s why you should leave your house a little more. You’re bound to find a little surprise in each day.”

Staring at one another, laughter erupted from the both of you and Brian began to fill a little warmth spread through his body.

-

Ever since that day, Brian began to be nicer to you. Both of you would greet one another from across the lawn and soon enough, that simple greeting transformed into conversations. Brian found talking to you very interesting, you had so much passion about everything and hearing you talk entranced him. You had huge hand gestures and quirky expression and those made him laugh all the time. Sitting down on your respective front yards to yell at one another across the street would become your way of communicating and that was the norm until you boldly crossed the road one day to lie down on the grass next to him. You didn’t even ask for permission; simply plopped down and stretched out your body across his lawn, the sweet scent of the grass filling your nose now that winter was over.

“What are you doing?”

“Lying down on your grass patch, anything wrong?”

“No but…”

“If there isn’t an issue, lie down next to me!” You patted the patch right next to you, smiling at him as you did.

“Ok…” Despite his sceptic tone in his voice, he did as you said, his shoulder just lightly brushing against yours.

“This is a much better way to have a conversation. I was going hoarse trying to yell at you across the street just now.”

“You’re so weak Y/N.”

“Try having 3 lectures back to back, I’ll see how you survive.” You were an assistant professor at a local university, a great achievement for someone your age and your brilliant mind was just one of the things he adored about you.

Both of you continued talking about previous topic of music for a little while before silence blanketed the both of you.

“Hey Y/N?”

“Yea?”

“Can I ask you a question?”

“Have I ever said no Brian? Ask away!”

Please Subscribe to read the full chapter