JR saw articles about Seongwoo’s broadcast with Daniel, and he immediately understood what was happening. Seongwoo did it as revenge, because of that Pepero game that JR played with Minhyun.

He felt so guilty; why did he agree to play that stupid game with Minhyun in the first place? Why didn’t he pull away as soon as their lips touched? Why did he indulge in the feeling of Minhyun’s lips? It was his fault this was happening. Minhyun was going to see these articles and watch the broadcast and feel hurt, and it was all his fault.

Trying to distract Minhyun from looking at his phone and coming across the viral video of “kissing OngNiel,” JR stalled. He succeeded in keeping Minhyun away from his phone throughout the rest of the day, until they were finally back at the dorm. Minhyun, showered and ready to sleep, opened his phone to catch up on the news. JR could not stall any longer.

Her nervously watched as Minhyun looked through his phone. When Minhyun saw the articles about the OngNiel broadcast, he threw his phone across his bed and groaned, running his fingers through his hair in frustration.

JR felt his heart sink at the sight. Hwang Minhyun, who usually took everything coolly, had now lost his cool. It meant that Minhyun was hurt.

“Do you… want to talk about it?” JR asked Minhyun hesitantly, nervous that he was making it worse by asking.

“I don’t know what to do anymore,” Minhyun said to JR. “Seongwoo has been unbearable lately.”

“I’m so sorry,” JR lowered his head in shame, and Minhyun narrowed his eyes.

“Why are you apologizing?”

“I know why he did it,” JR answered. “It’s because… we did something similar…”

“No, we didn’t,” Minhyun cut him off. “We were playing a game. Ong was… he was being an . He was doing it to provoke me, and it worked.”

JR fell silent; he didn’t know what to say. To Minhyun, that Pepero kiss with him might have been a game, but to JR, it was a lot more than that, and that made him feel even guiltier.

There was an awkward silence, the kind of silence that was often followed by advice from JR, advice that Minhyun now seemed to expect. But JR had nothing wise to say this time. When JR didn’t fil the silence, Minhyun did.

“I didn’t tell you this, JR, but Seongwoo broke up with me the minute after Wanna One disbanded. He wanted to end things, but I didn’t let him. Now I think back and wish that I did. Seongwoo warned me that he wouldn’t be able to handle…” Minhyun trailed off, and then shook his head indicating that he didn’t want to continue.

“Handle what?” JR asked curiously.

“He wouldn’t be able to handle when you back into my life,” Minhyun answered.

It all suddenly made sense to JR: the reason Seongwoo was spending too much time in the NU’EST dorm, the reason he stuck to Minhyun like a leech, the reason he went so far with Daniel during that V-Live. JR had truly not been aware of how much it bothered Seongwoo that he was in Minhyun’s life. He somehow just assumed that Seongwoo was cool with him, but that obviously wasn’t the case.

“I… I’m sorry,” JR felt the need to apologize. He felt like he had somehow, unknowingly, come between them; how happy would they have been if it weren’t for him.

“Please, don’t apologize,” Minhyun shook his head. “That’s why I was afraid of telling you; I knew you’d take the blame even if none of this was even remotely your fault.”

“I can’t stand being a burden to your relationship,” JR voiced. “If Seongwoo doesn’t like us being roommates, I can trade places with Aron. Actually, you know what, let Ong have my bed. I can take the sofa outside…”

“JR, stop,” Minhyun interjected. He knew that JR would offer to do something like that; it was such a JR thing to do. “I don’t want you to do anything about this at all, okay? It’s not for you to worry about.”

But, of course, JR, being the self-sacrificing person that he was, could not stop worrying about it.

-

 “Come on!” Daniel whined to Baekho. “I told you my biggest secret, and you won’t tell why you hate Ong so much?”

Baekho chuckled at that. For someone who out-ied him on Produce 101, Daniel was almost too much like a child.

“Look Daniel, I trust you, I really do. But I can’t tell you this.”

“Why not???”

“Because my company would kill me.”

“Oh… so it’s like… scandalous, right?”

“Something like that.”

“Can you just at least give the gist of it?”

“Fine,” Baekho agreed. He felt bad that Daniel had basically poured out his secrets onto the table only to get nothing from Baekho. And Baekho trusted the guy, he really did. It did not seem possible that someone like Kang Daniel could ever have bad intentions.

Daniel leaned in closer to hear what Baekho would tell him.

“Basically, I hate Seongwoo because he blackmailed me. He had something on me that he threatened to make it public. I hated him ever since.”

“What kind of something?” Daniel asked with raised eyebrows.

“That’s the scandalous part.”

“I’m curious!!!” Daniel whined.

“You should be more concerned about the fact the love of your life blackmailed me!” Baekho chuckled.

“Ew. No. He’s not the love of my life,” Daniel claimed. “I just… I like him, okay?”

“And you don’t care that he’s a blackmailer?”

“Ong says he will do a lot of bad , but he never does it,” Daniel claimed confidently. “I don’t think he would have ever released the he had on you. He’s not that kind of guy.”

“Well, I still hate him, and I think you should re-evaluate your choice in men!” Baekho nudged him playfully.

“Why don’t you tell Minhyun that?” Daniel scoffed.

“Oh I told him. Multiple times,” Baekho said.

“Do you want them to break up?” Daniel asked.

“Hell yeah,” Baekho answered with no hesitation. “Please, if you can, seduce Ong out of Minhyun’s life, and I would love you forever.”

“Me? Seduce Ong? Over Hwang Gallyang? Not going to happen,” Daniel muttered self-consciously. “Plus, what are we even saying? Isn’t it kind of ty that we’re talking about sabotaging a happy relationship?”

Sabotaging a happy relationship. Baekho just burst out laughing. Oh, if only Daniel knew.

“What? Why are you laughing?” Daniel looked confused by Baekho’s laughter. “What’s so funny?”

“Just that…” Baekho trailed off. “Forget it.”

“Another secret???”

“Yes.”

“You have too many secrets, Dongho. I’m starting to get scared,” Daniel muttered under his breath.

“Let me just tell you this,” Baekho began. “You said that Seongwoo wouldn’t do any bad . Well you’re very wrong about that.”

“Wait, did he… sabotage a happy relationship?” Daniel put two and two together, narrowing his eyes toward Baekho curiously.

“Maybe,” Baekho shrugged. He knew he said too much already.

Daniel glared at Baekho and then pointed at him accusingly, “you were Minhyun’s past lover before, weren’t you? That’s the big secret, isn’t it?”

Baekho burst out laughing.

Daniel pouted. “What’s so funny this time?”

“Wrong member, dude,” Baekho told Daniel before leaving the weight-lifting station, not giving Daniel a chance to ask any more questions.

But Daniel didn’t need to ask any more questions. He understood.

-

Seongwoo didn’t think revenge would hurt this much.

He regretted it, of course. Minhyun wouldn’t even talk to him since that time, and Seongwoo knew that he went a little too far. He was sorry. To both Minhyun and to Daniel (who was also angry with him).

He realized how blind jealousy had made him. Seongwoo was usually a smart guy; he usually made articulate calculations before carrying out any revenge plan, but this time, Seongwoo made no calculations, and his plan ended up hurting both Minhyun and Daniel.

But nothing made him feel jerkier than when he received a message from none other than angel Kim Jonghyun.

Hey. I’m moving into Minki’s room. Also, you don’t have anything to worry about, okay? I’ll keep my distance from him.

Why was Kim Jonghyun so… nice? He was annoyingly nice. The kind of nice that made Seongwoo feel like a bad person. Seongwoo couldn’t even reply to the message, because he couldn’t think of anything to say. He couldn’t even make a joke out of it.

It made him want to apologize to Minhyun even more, because he realized how ridiculous this jealousy was.

Minhyun, I am a jerk that deserves to be burned in a pit. I’m so very really truly genuinely sorry. I love you.

Minhyun only replied the following morning with a simple: I forgive you.

-

The more time Bakeho spent with Daniel, the more he liked the guy. It was funny, actually; in Produce 101, the two never really had the chance to bond because somehow they saw one another as competition and never let loose in front of the other. But now, as gym buddies, suddenly the two clicked and became very good friends very quickly.

Daniel opened up about a lot of things in his life, mostly about his feelings for his ex-best friend.

“You’re the only one in the world who knows about this by the way,” Daniel told him. “I can’t tell any other Wanna One members because I’m sure they’ll blabber and Ong will know. But I told you, because I know you’d keep a secret.”

“You overestimate me,” Baekho laughed. “I didn’t keep Minhyun’s secret very well, did I?”

Daniel did not inquire further about said secret since Baekho implied it, mostly because Daniel knew it was wrong to be talking about it behind Minhyun’s back, and Daniel didn’t like to pry. But now that Baekho had opened up that can of worms, Daniel took the opportunity to ask some questions.

“For how long were they together?”

“Over three years,” Baekho answered.

“I could have never guessed they were dating. They never showed it.”

“They weren’t a very touchy couple,” Baekho said. “But they were very much in love. And I think they still are.”

“Really?”

“Definitely,” Baekho answered. He was confident of that. No matter how much the two liked to pretend they were only friends, there was something between them that went way beyond friendship.

“What makes you say that?”

“When you live with someone for almost ten years, you kinda notice.”

“I don’t agree. Minhyun seems to be happy with Seongwoo,” Daniel asserted. Minhyun was clearly head over heels for Seongwoo– Minhyun agreed to do things for (and with) Seongwoo that no one would ever imagine that Hwang Minhyun would ever do. If that wasn’t a sign of some special kind of devotion on Minhyun’s part, he didn’t know what was.

Baekho just shrugged, unconvinced.

“Why don’t we test it? Like... maybe I can flirt with Minki and try to see Minhyun’s reaction…”

“Wait… what?” Baekho asked, raising an eyebrow.

“To see if Minhyun still has feelings for Minki…”

Baekho bit his lower lip and eyed Daniel with a mixture of both amusement and disbelief. Maybe he had overestimated the guy’s intelligence. Maybe it was best to leave it at that; no need to correct him.

“Wait… it is Minki, right?” Daniel asked. When Baekho didn’t answer, Daniel raised an eyebrow, confused. “Aron?”

Baekho just burst out laughing again. The poor guy really was clueless.

“It can’t be Jonghyun, though,” Daniel muttered. “That guy likes anime s! Plus, he dated that girl from DIA.”

“You got enough out of me,” Baekho raised his arms to indicate that he didn’t want to say anymore.

“Come on!” Daniel whined. “Is it Jonghyun?! Tell me!”

“Not telling,” Baekho mumbled.

“It’s Aron?” Daniel continued to press.

“Maybe.”

“Dude!” Daniel groaned in frustration. “You’re driving me crazy here!”

“Why don’t you come over and have dinner with us one day and observe. Maybe then you’ll figure it out yourself.”

-

Daniel did take Baekho up on that offer. He went out to dinner with the NU’EST members one day, and Seongwoo tagged along just so that it wasn’t awkward.

Minhyun and Seongwoo sat together of course, and seemed as happy as always. Daniel sat beside Dongho, who, took the seat farthest away from Seongwoo.

Daniel watched everyone with a close eye. Minki sat in front of the happy couple, bickering with Aron about some lyrics they had to write. There was nothing weird about the way he talked to Minhyun or the way they interacted.

As for Aron, he was conversing with Seongwoo quite easily. They already sounded like BFFs, bonding over lame puns and old man jokes. If Seongwoo really did “sabotage a happy relationship” between him and Minhyun, then Aron most definitely would not have formed this kind of relationship with his ex’s new lover. It made no sense. It could not be Aron.

It was then that Daniel paid attention to Jonghyun, who was quiet most of the time. This wasn’t unusual: Jonghyun did have his quiet moments, and Daniel knew that all too well since Produce 101. Still, Daniel waited for some kind of interaction between him and Minhyun so that her could see if there was something “special” between them.

There was no interaction. Nothing at all. Eventually, Jonghyun did speak to make fun of Minki’s outfit and to ask news about Daniel’s second debut, and to tell Dongho about an idea for a new MV concept, but to Seongwoo and Minhyun– it was almost like he was avoiding them.

It was in the very lack of interaction between them that Daniel began to realize that it probably had been Jonghyun all along. Still, a part of him was skeptical. Jonghyun was totally straight… it couldn’t be Jonghyun, could it?

“Do you know who it is yet?” Dongho whispered to him.

“I think so…”

“You think so?” Dongho looked unsatisfied.

“Just tell me so I can be sure!” Daniel grumbled.

“Nope,” Dongho said, proceeding to eat another bite of his burger before Daniel could ask any more questions.

Daniel grumbled and continued to watch Jonghyun and Minhyun carefully.

It was only when Seongwoo went to the bathroom that Daniel finally caught an interaction between them.

Minhyun just barely looked in Jonghyun’s direction, and Daniel noticed a very un-Minhyun-like expression, one that the bright and ever-so-positive hyung rarely ever showed. It was sadness– the melancholic type of sadness that you see in movies. JR was too busy picking the tomatoes from his burger to notice that sadness.

When Seongwoo returned, Minhyun stopped looking.

If Daniel had any doubts about who it was before, he certainly did not have any doubts now.

-

Even though Minhyun had asked him not to do anything about Seongwoo, JR couldn’t help it. He had to act on the knowledge that Seongwoo was uncomfortable with the state of Minhyun and JR’s relationship, and so he kept his distance.

First and foremost, he switched beds with Ren. He also started to sit far away from Minhyun when they had to be on camera together. He avoided being alone with Minhyun at all costs. He basically limited his interactions with Minhyun as much he can, especially when Seongwoo was around.

Minhyun had confronted JR about this on more than one occasion, asking him to just act normally again. JR would say that he would, but somehow, he was not able to go back to the way it was before. He couldn’t be normal with Minhyun anymore, because he knew that being normal meant that Seongwoo would feel uncomfortable.

And it was not just about Seongwoo; it was also about himself. JR was aware of his own fragile heart that could easily develop feelings for his Minhyun again, and he didn’t want to. If being distant with Minhyun could help him shut down those feelings before they had the chance to defeat him, then he decided he needed to do it.

Hence, there was suddenly this big brick wall between him and Minhyun that really took a toll on their relationship. For the first time in nine years, it felt like they were in some kind of business/work relationship. It was not even friendship at this point.

But Seongwoo seemed happy. He had actually gone to JR and thanked him for switching rooms and for limiting his dealings with Minhyun. Seongwoo and Minhyun stopped fighting and they two seemed happy together again. That in itself was enough to tell JR that this was a good idea. At least Minhyun was happy in his relationship again. At least JR was not getting in between them.

-

Minhyun really, really liked Seongwoo. Seongwoo was funny. He was smart. He was wild. He was exciting. He was attractive. He was almost perfect.

“Almost” because Seongwoo was also ruining something that Minhyun had held so dear: his friendship with Jonghyun.

Minhyun accepted that he had to break up with Jonghyun to embrace a relationship with Seongwoo. He even accepted having to watch JR’s shattered expression when Minhyun rejected JR’s advances and pleas to get back together. He accepted having to break JR’s heart, even if it was one of the most difficult things he had ever had to do, but he did it, thinking it was worth it in the end.

But now, increasingly, Minhyun was starting to feel like it had not been worth it at all.

Minhyun wished he could have known from the very beginning that things would have ended up like this. He wished he would have known that Seongwoo would break more than just the romance between him and Jonghyun, but also the friendship. If he had known this would happen, Minhyun would have deemed it way too high a price to pay.

Looking back, Minhyun miscalculated a lot when he made the decision to break up with Jonghyun. He miscalculated JR’s interest in women; he had though that JR wanted to experiment with girls, but it seemed like JR was less concerned about that than Minhyun thought. He also miscalculated their ability to bounce back from a break-up and be on close terms again; it was never the same between them since then. But most of all, Minhyun miscalculated how easily his heart would get over Jonghyun; he had thought that the feelings were gone, but every so often, he’d see the guy do something cute and his heart would skip a beat. He’d see JR smile, and Minhyun would drown in a sort of adoration for the other that he should not be feeling. Not anymore. Not when he was dating someone else.

Minhyun tried bury those resurfacing feelings by indulging in Seongwoo in all possible ways, by trying to convince himself that this was the man he had feelings for, and it worked for a while.

But his unnatural fondness for JR continued to torment him, especially as JR continued to avoid him. It was killing Minhyun inside to see his leader treat him like a stranger.

It had come to the point where Minhyun was even jealous of Baekho, Aron and Ren. Seeing JR laugh and play with them, joke with them, push them around, tease them… he wanted that. But instead, all he got from JR were polite smiles, “good mornings,” and small talk.

And as it got worse, the magic of Seongwoo’s kisses began to dwindle. Seongwoo’s touches no longer electrified him the way they did before, and Minhyun’s heart closed off completely. What replaced all those feelings Minhyun had once harbored for his boyfriend was an eager longing to have his other friend back. To have Jonghyunnie back. Just as a friend.

At one point, he had had enough. It was after a dinner with Daniel and Seongwoo, in which Jonghyun didn’t even talk to him. After that dinner, he waited until they were back in the dorm, Seongwoo and Daniel out of sight.

“JR, I’m tired of this,” he said to his leader, in front of the other members. “Until when are we going to keep being like this?”

JR looked caught off guard by the question. “What do you mean? We’re okay, Minhyunnie,” JR said, and JR really believed it. They were okay, because finally Minhyun was able to strike a balance between keeping his boyfriend satisfied and maintaining a working relationship with JR.

“You call this okay? You didn’t even look at me tonight! Just because I was with Seongwoo doesn’t mean you have to act like a stranger!” Minhyun tried not to sound angry or emotional. He tried to keep his cool, but he was seconds away from losing it, and of course, JR noted this.

“I just don’t want to come between you again…”

“God, JR, I’d rather end everything I have with Seongwoo than have to act like a stranger with you!” Minhyun blurted loudly.

That made everyone go silent for a moment. It was a heavy thing, what Minhyun just said, something on which a lot was at stake. No one really knew what to say about Minhyun alluding to the end of his happy relationship.

JR finally stepped forward and wrapped his arms around Minhyun, as if to reassure him that they were not strangers. At first Minhyun was stiff but eased into the embrace, wrapping his arms around JR’s small body.

It had been almost too long since they hugged like this, and Minhyun forgot how much he missed it. He missed the feeling of JR against his chest, fitting so perfectly in his arms like he was always meant to be there.

Minhyun didn’t want to let go; JR had to pry himself out of Minhyun’s arms in order to face him and say: “I’m not treating you like a stranger Minhyun. On the contrary, I’m treating you like this because I care about you.”

“Then please spare me the torment of watching us drift apart,” Minhyun replied, his voice wavering. “Please, let’s go back to the way things were before”

Seeing Minhyun like this made JR’s heart hurt. He really didn’t mean to make Minhyun feel like a stranger, to torment him, or to make him even consider the prospect of ending a happy relationship.

JR gave Minhyun brief nod. “Okay,” he agreed. “I promise I’ll try.”

When JR made that promise, he didn’t realize how difficult it would be, and he had forgotten what “the way things were before” entailed.

That night, JR was in bed, close to drifting into sleep, when he felt someone silently slip in from behind him. JR turned his head to see that it was Minhyun.

“Minhyun, what are you doing?” JR asked, making space for Minhyun.

“I’m going back to the way things were,” Minhyun answered, as he made himself comfortable on JR’s pillow.

Yes, this was the way things were before: when Minhyun was feeling troubled and in need of consolation, he would go to JR’s bed and gain strength from just sleeping beside his leader.

JR remembered the last time that happened: way too long ago actually. It was on June 16, 2017, when Minhyun had made Wanna One and JR did not. How upset Minhyun had been that day. How much he had cried. They spent that night together, talking about the future and promising to always be in contact when they were apart. Neither of them would have ever expected that things would turn out this way.

As Minhyun nestled against his friend’s back, JR wondered if this was really alright. Seongwoo would most definitely not approve, and it was also not a smart thing to do if JR was trying to bury his feelings.

Still, JR could not bring himself to complain. He missed it so much, and found the nostalgia made him so numb he couldn’t evenbring himself to speak up against it, especially as Minhyun’s arms s around his waist and brought him closer.

JR felt a funny feeling in the pit of his stomach, but it was from unpleasant. On the contrary, it was almost too pleasant.

“Thank you for letting me,” Minhyun hummed softly from beside JR. “I really needed this again.”

“Any time, Minhyunnie,” JR spoke back softly. “Any time.”

A/N: The writer’s block was almost too painful for this chapter! There are literally 7 pages of deleted scenes from this chapter only >.<
Anyways… hopefully it isn’t as boring as I felt that it was ^^;