Sometimes I wonder how it is to actually feel peaceful, serenity, since all of my teenage life; I can’t recall the last time I’ve ever been in that situation or ever maybe. But right now, I think that is what I’m currently feeling.

I feel free.

I feel light.

It feels so nice.

No burden whatsoever, no hindering thoughts about the past, future, nothing, just pure serenity.

I feel a blinding light from my closed eyelids. Fluttering it open slowly, I am met with the scene that is not from this world. Vast garden filled with all kinds of flower. Some even are from the kinds that are usually from a different season.

Only then I realize the feeling of a fresh grass tickling my bare feet, the slow and calming breeze around me. Turning to the other side of the garden, what I saw got me left standing in awe.

Definitely not from my world.

It’s a lake with a waterfall at the beginning, subconsciously walking closer, the water’s so clear that you can see the life underneath it. All in all, it was the most beautiful lake I’ve ever seen. Or maybe I just didn’t get enough traveling.  But nevertheless I’m going to enjoy this while I can.

Taking a seat at one of the rock near the edge, I close my eyes, wanting to use my other senses to enjoy the beautiful surrounding. But just as I close my eyes, all of my serenity is being taken away from me.

Flashbacks are suddenly being thrown at me, flashbacks of me… and him. From the scary first encounter, the first visit, the first time being his meal. I shudder at that. But the memories didn’t stop, continuing to the first date, the weird farewell. It didn’t even miss the dream I had that night at the dock.

The memories continue until finally it stops to the last confession in which I make. Unfortunately that being the most recent, I could almost feel the pain I felt that time. The look on his face looking down at me as I lay helplessly in his arms voicing my love for him as if it was the last goodbye. Or maybe it is.

Maybe I have indeed died that moment and now I am in heaven. That explains this astounding environment I’m currently in, the serenity.

Releasing a shaky breath, I tried to calm my heartbeat that sped up during those flashbacks. I open my eyes once again to look at this place that I thought to be heaven.

People always say that heaven is the best resting place every human could ask for. And for a while, I agreed, definitely. There is no way that I want to go back to my world after being given such place and feelings as this.

But that was before my mind was filled once again with memories of him. Now, how I want to go back and return to his arms, to feel complete. For heaven to me, is every moment I have with him.

To me heaven is with him.

Time meant nothing when I’m with him. Those feeling of completeness and