4 The Confidant

After the mini photo-shoot at the yard, only the three of them cleaned up the mess. It is already 2 in the morning and Youngkyun’s already in a deep slumber in his room. It was all thanks to Baekhyun who carried him from being sprawled out at the lawn to his bed. On that night, they all agreed Youngkyun’s a weak drinker.

“I'll just take a shower,” Jennie says. “And you.” She points at Baekhyun. “Wait for me. Understand?” Before Baekhyun could even answer, she sashayed her way inside the house.

Silence filled the cold air for five minutes. Only the rustle of beer tin cans and plastic wrappers can be heard. It was such a deafening silence.

“What was that all about?” Baekhyun stops cleaning and sits on the bench.

Due to exhaustion, Tzuyu in a flat tone answers, “Nothing.”

“Have you seen anything?”

“When have I ever?” She sighs. She’s getting tired of it all—the vision, the question, the lives. She has never asked for it but it came to her involuntarily. She wants it gone. She no longer wants to see other people’s lives. It doesn’t strike her in awe anymore.

 “Spill,” Baekhyun orders. He looks serious now. He has never looked like this before except when it comes to his family and Jennie. He abruptly stands from his seat and smacks the table. Tzuyu flinches at the loud sound of his palms against the table. “I know you want to keep whatever you see in those goddamned lenses to yourself but this is my cousin we’re talking about, Tzuyu.” Baekhyun looks straight into her eyes. “All I want to know is what made him this way and what will happen to him. I guess you don’t want to tell me. Whatever happens to Youngkyun, Tzuyu, whatever happens,” he repeats. “I swear to god, I will blame you for not telling me.”

Tzuyu lets go of the garbage bag in her hands in surrender. “I just saw their fight! That’s all! Youngkyun already told us the story. Every bit of it—from the van to the fist landing on his cheek down to the moment he fled,” she confesses. But Tzuyu lied. It wasn’t all there is. She didn’t tell him about the tears. She didn’t tell him how he hid inside their dormitory for a few hours, crying. She didn’t tell him how his cousin’s tears don’t seem to be just about the incident their fans have witnessed—it was more than that.

Baekhyun looks at her suspiciously as if noticing how Tzuyu has lied to him. “Is that all there is?” He raises his eyebrows. It must’ve been because she has never said anything to Baekhyun that easy. Before, when it the vision was too new for her, she tells Baekhyun what she’s seen right away but as time goes by and as she grows accustomed to it, whatever she tells Baekhyun dwindles and then, nothing at all.

Tzuyu nods hesitantly. “Yes, Baekhyun. That’s all it. No more, no less.”

***

There’s been a lot of times Tzuyu has been to a photo-shoot with Baekhyun. Every new product The Face Shop releases, her team is called to shoot his new endorsement project. And there’s something she has never said anything to anyone.

***

Tzuyu looks at Baekhyun who has just been left by the makeup team for re-touch. “Okay, ready. 1… 2… 3…,” she pauses. She becomes distracted by something she knows she wasn’t supposed to see.

***

“Are you sure with that?”

“Oh, Jennie. I am more than sure of this.”

“But what if Chanyeol never realizes it?” Jennie stammers.

“Jennie, you’re far beyond ‘just a catch.’ Don’t ever think of yourself that low. Whoever gets to have you by their side must have been luckier than those who have won the lottery thrice.” Baekhyun stops walking. “And Chanyeol’s a little too stupid not to realize that. Anyway, knowing him, he’ll surely get jealous and want you back. He’s that kind.”

Jennie stops walking and faces Baekhyun. “What kind?”

“The kind of someone who already has the world in his hands but doesn't realize how lucky he is and when it is taken away from him, he’ll come back to his senses and do everything to get it back.”

Jennie smiles a little to Baekhyun’s analogy. “Then, do you think those who have won the lottery four times are luckier than that someone who has me by their side?”

“What?” Bakehyun flutters. He was taken aback by Jennie’s small smile and her unexpected retort.

“I was just kidding, slowpoke!” Jennie laughs. “C’mon, let’s talk about what you’re planning to make Chanyeol come back to me.” Jennie extends her arm and offered her hand to Baekhyun.

***

“Hey, snap out of it,” Baekhyun whispers enough for Tzuyu to hear.

“I’m sorry I was just thinking of something else. Very unprofessional, I know. Sorry,” she apologizes. Baekhyun looks at her with utter curiosity.

“Okay, break-time!” She tells everyone. The team was quick to go to the table where all the lunchboxes were at. She reviews the shots at the monitor by herself when she feels a light tap on her shoulder. She looks up and sees Baekhyun looking at her. “What do you want?” She asks in a hushed voice.

“What did you see?” This isn’t the first time he asked her that question. Whenever she comes home from work and spots Baekhyun hanging out with Jennie, he would often ask her how the photo-shoot went and what she has seen that made her look so exhausted.

“You know what is always awarded to artists at every end of the year, right? You’ll win that,” she lies.

“You’re not just making all that up, right?”

“I am not.”

Thankfully, EXO really won a daesang award that year…

***

“Let’s resume within three minutes, everyone!” She announces. She started adjusting the camera when Baekhyun claps his hands.

“Tzuyu! Why don’t you take pictures of me while I get ready? You know… for behind the scenes photos?”

“Nice idea.” Only was it really not.

***

“Jennie, I’m sorry,” Baekhyun runs after her.

The moment he finally caught her arms, Jennie struggled to escape his grasp. It was kind of painful for me to see when tears started rolling on my best friend’s cheeks.

“I didn’t mean it, Jennie. I’m sorry,” he pleads. Tears were flowing as if there won’t be an end to it. Finally, Jennie was able to be free of his grasp. Baekhyun was shocked at the amount of force Jennie had. “Fine. Yes, I admit. I think I don’t pretend anymore. Yes, I already like you now. Heck, I think I’m already in love with you! But what can I do? It's not as if I want this to happen. It's not like this was part of the plan. I wanted you to have Chanyeol back but I don't think I can still do that now. Sorry for loving you, Jennie. I love you. I love you.” Baekhyun was already panting. He lost his breath confessing but the tears in his eyes continue to flow. "I love you," he repeats. "I can't give you back to Chanyeol anymore. I'm sorry I love you."

***

“Did the shots turn out all right?” Baekhyun asks. Tzuyu looks at her camera and notices she has taken a lot of his pictures much to her unconsciousness.

“Uh, yeah.” Tzuyu studies her shots. Baekhyun looks at her, anticipating for more. “You always look good, Baekhyun. That’s a given,” she adds.

***

“Oh, Tzuyu. You’re still here?” Jennie comes out to the yard. She looks fresh like she just came out from the bath. She wears no makeup at all but is wearing an outfit that will surely look good in Dispatch photos.

“Where are you going dressed so nicely?” Tzuyu asks.

“Oh, I wasn’t able to tell you?” Jennie grabs a chair and sits beside Baekhyun. “I’m going on a photo-shoot in Jeju for like, a day or two. That’s why Baekhyun came here tonight too.”

“Is he coming with you? You know, the usual boyfriend duty—dropping you off and picking you up at your destinations.”

“Nope. I have a pre-recording for my solo album. I’m just here to spend some more time with her before we both get busy,” Baekhyun answers, lacing his fingers with hers.

“Are you saying I’d be left here with….” Tzuyu trails off. There is a loud thud that comes from inside. “Was that Youngkyun?”

“Please take care of my cousin, Tzuyu.” Baekhyun looks at her expectantly as if expecting her to jump out of joy.

Is there anyone who’s going to book me for a photo-shoot tomorrow? Tzuyu wonders, wanting to escape.