A/N: Feel free to tell me what you think of the chapter :) Merry Christmas everyone and enjoy your holidays! 

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While staring at the ceiling, Yixing thought of what Min Hee had told him earlier, her advice for him specifically. Did he really confuse his past feelings with the present? Was he still reminiscing about their memories and wishing to return to those times?

Yixing wasn't sure, he didn't know what he was or wasn't feeling for Jung Ha Na. He didn't have many relationship experiences to decipher his feelings. Thinking about it confused him and kept him awake longer. Yixing took out his phone and tapped on Ha Na's contact. The last time they met was during Ha Na's visit in China. The idol tossed and turned, thinking deeply about the reason why he had given her a second chance in the first place.

Yes, he might be lonely and stressed, longing to relive his feelings and experience from a few years ago. Nothing really changed. Their fight made it clear, she still had some trust issues or it was simple jealousy. Yixing only wished for one thing, to feel loved and to love which was difficult with the present circumstances. 

To feel loved and to love. Yixing sat up quickly and looked around. To feel loved and to love. To do so, he didn't need a lover. He had enough people who loved him and there were many people he loved. It was just not the same type of love. Yixing lowered his face into his palms in frustration. His mind was full of thoughts, creating a chaos. Let's draw a final conclusion now, Zhang Yixing.

Looking back at Ha Na's profile photo and remembering the moments they have spent together, he felt bad for thinking about parting ways yet again. "It's time to move on completely and cut off the ties with each other. It would be for the best, for both of us, right?" Ha Na deserved a person who could give her the love and affection she wanted and needed, who would fill the emptiness inside her heart. In Yixing's case, he had already found his people years ago who gave him everything he needed. His family and his friends (s included) and especially his fans. I don't need a relationship at the moment. And Ha Na shouldn't waste her time chasing after me, either. 

Maybe in five to ten years from now on, Yixing would start looking for someone to settle down with. Regardless of how this might sound, he couldn't 'afford' a girlfriend. He would be the one receiving, but not giving. No time which also means no love, no affection. It took me long enough to realise that what I liked was the idea of excitement and filling the emptiness. Thus, I assumed there was a chance we might get back together. After all, there was a clear reason why they separated six years ago. 

Yixing didn't remember when he fell asleep, but when he woke up, it was still dark outside. Yixing personally went to the convenience store to buy some snacks for him and his staff members. There were not many people in the morning and it was very quiet today, good for him. Before returning to the hotel, Yixing dropped by at the studio again. Yesterday, he left Min Hee there. I wonder if she went home or stayed at the office overnight. 

After consuming the whole bottle of rice wine, Min Hee had fallen asleep and not waken up anymore no matter how hard Yixing tried to wake her. It would be very uncomfy on that office chair for the whole night. I really hope she isn't in the studio and went home. Before reluctantly leaving Min Hee alone to return to the hotel by himself, Yixing had put a blanket over her shoulders and left her a sticky note. 

Knocking on the door to Min Hee's office, he waited a few seconds and entered. She had her earphones in and didn't hear Yixing coming. "Don't tell me you stayed the night?" Instead of strawberry milk, he went into the office with two cups of green tea.

"Good morning to you, too." Min Hee looked up from her work and took her earphones out to greet her friend. "Thanks for the blanket yesterday. I woke up at dawn but it was too late to go home so I stayed here." 

Yixing closed the door behind him and took a seat on the exact same place as the day before. "I should really consider buying sofa beds for the offices if anyone overnights at the studio again. Is your back alright?"

Min Hee nodded her head quickly, stretching her arms. "My neck's hurting more, but I had a good night's sleep." Silence followed. She couldn't think of anything to change the topic. "By the way, there is an event coming up for the start of the drama filming next week. Do you know how difficult it was to convince the producer to reschedule it on the 4th? You'll probably receive more offers for romantic comedies afterwards." 

Yixing waved his hand and denied. "I haven't even begun filming yet. The plot is interesting but to be honest, romantic comedies aren't my cup of tea. It makes me uncomfortable for a reason just like very emotional scenes, I'm unable to act them out with all the necessary details."

"Why is that? You do great in romances, though. I can imagine especially your fans enjoying those." Min Hee , recalling Yixing's past works. He was always open for various genres and types of characters.

"Romantic scenes in music videos are alright, because it's easier to grasp the entire concept for me, but not in dramas. Acting is just a job and doesn't represent reality. There is always an expectation in romances and that's the physical affection. Maybe it's because I'm conservative so I can't understand it but kissing is what you do in a relationship, isn't it? Love can be expressed differently on TV." Zhang Yixing only kisses when he has genuine feelings. Silence followed again. "When you plan your scripts for romances, do you always include a kiss scene?" 

Min Hee thought back to all of the stories she wrote. Most of them didn't even get to be produced and shown on TV. "Writing love stories isn't my style either but it's true I usually include at least one kiss scene. I agree, though, that love can be expressed differently. You don't need a kiss scene for that, it's just mainly for the viewership." Sure, Yixing could do and film whatever he wanted and as a conservative and traditional man, Min Hee comprehended his point of view. "It says in here you are flying to Seoul the day after but there is neither an event nor an activity listed. And you're going back to China on the next day? Is that flight really necessary?" 

"Because I have some unfinished business to do. That's why I urgently need to stop by in Seoul." Yixing responded to her and lowered his head thinking about the next obstacle in his life. It's already next week. "You drank quite a lot yesterday."

"Thanks for your concern but it wasn't much. I'm usually good at holding my liquor." Whether Min Hee was pretending to have forgotten about last night or just didn't talk about it didn't matter. For the first time, Yixing managed to be the sober one next to the main drinking buddy. "Whatever you saw yesterday was only the tip of the iceberg. You better don't want to see me completely wasted, Yixing. But I don't know yet what it takes me for that day to come."

Yixing only smiled amused over her tipsy behaviour. A nice start into the day. How great would it be to have every day start as light-hearted and relaxing as this morning? Perhaps, Min Hee's presence was the cause. Having her around made Yixing feel comfortable and at ease. That might be I'm trusting her deeply. Before he knew it, the day to end another chapter in his life arrived.

As Lay Zhang stepped on South Korean soil this morning again, he grew nervous all of a sudden. His stay was only temporary, not even a day long. He was busy waving at his fans and following his manager at the airport. Even in the car, he waved at his fans before checking his phone once the car started moving. Jung Ha Na. Yixing texted her, informing his ex-girlfriend about his arrival. He had planned on going to her house secretly, in daylight, which was the reason why Yixing's manager couldn't drop him off there. He was driven to the dormitory and took a taxi to Ha Na's house.

Standing in front of the right building, Yixing called her. It was the same house where he used to pick her up from when they used to date years ago. She never moved away. Luckily, he wasn't seen due to a big gate blocking the view to the street. A few seconds later, she opened the door and came out excitedly with a smile. They haven't seen each other for two months and Ha Na felt sorry about getting upset at Yixing. She apologised and the smile she showed made the idol feel guilty. Especially now, facing her made Yixing realise he had to let go once for all. An honest and proper answer would be best. Why was it so hard though? This isn't even a breakup; she has hurt me once and I don't want to hurt her back now. People's hearts can't be changed easily. But my heart won't change no matter how long she will persuade me.

"Ha Na, I have something to say. I felt like I have to do it in person." Yixing managed to say, unknowingly remembering the day when it was Ha Na who said it. That's how she must have felt on the day of our breakup. I couldn't catch on what Ha Na wanted to tell me.

The addressed one already had a slight idea because Yixing showed up at her house in broad daylight and judging from the way he talked to her with a serious expression on his face, it wasn't good news. When Yixing texted her earlier though, she had hoped the reason for his visit was a positive change of heart. Ha Na smiled sadly and turned around to go back into her house but Yixing stopped her by calling her name. "I really have something important to say, so I'd like you to listen to me."

"Is it because of our fight?" Ha Na contronted him, not wanting to hear the words Yixing was intending to say today. "Do you want to take revenge on me now? Because I broke up with you six years ago. I know I did wrong, I will do better, it might work out later!"

Memories of him trying to convince Ha Na otherwise before came back flooding. Déjà vu. Yixing had also attempted to persuade Ha Na in vain. He wanted to understand her and the reason for the breakup but they were unable to communicate properly. I didn't know anything, I still don't know anything about relationships. "I am sorry, Ha Na. I am not taking revenge, we never got back together in the first place. This is how I feel."

Meeting her eyes became difficult. He didn't want to see the pain in her eyes because it reminded him of his own pain. Did Ha Na feel sorry for me? Did it also hurt her when she broke up with me? "I never understood why you came back, I had refused to believe the reason was my success after debuting because it'd be wrong to assume. Ha Na, I don't have any kind of feelings for you left which is why we should both go separate ways and focus on our own lives. Even if we dated again, I'd never be able to make you my first priority."

"I'm able to wait. Remember? I always waited for you when you were a trainee, I am used to it, I can handle." Ha Na responded confidently and met Yixing's eyes.

He shook his head with a weak smile. "You can't expect me to make time for you, Ha Na. Work is my first priority, I'm not looking for a relationship at the moment or any time soon. Also, you broke up with me for that same reason except now, I have already debuted. Anyway, I came here to tell you this. We should stop contacting each other as well and I'd prefer if we go back quietly to our lives." Yixing felt pressured about the fact that he couldn't even make time for his family and members who were always working hard. 

Tears rolled down Ha Na's cheeks, she was crying. Yixing faced her directly, standing firmly. He wasn't in the place to wipe those tears away for Ha Na, but it broke his heart to make a girl cry. "Don't waste your time persuading me because during this precious period, you could've found another source of happiness somewhere else, maybe in a different person. I'd only prevent you. Thank you sincerely for the year we spent together and I'm sorry." Guilt overcame him just talking about. He didn't want to lie or disguise the facts, but keeping his speech too short might come off as insincere. 

That moment Yixing's phone started to vibrate. Bad timing. He took it out to see who was calling. Min Hee's Chinese name was shown on the display but Ha Na caught on. "Is it because of her? Your friend."

Yixing looked at her utterly confused with furrowed eyebrows. "Did you really listen to me? Is this what you think of me as a person? I genuinely hope you will be happy, it's my turn to leave now." He was unable to smile due to the tears Ha Na shed, but as he wanted to leave their relationship as a good memory, Yixing smiled sadly and bowed his head for a polite goodbye. They were neither friends nor lovers, the word strangers or just simply acquaintances fit their relationship the best. Leaving Ha Na crying in front of her house, Yixing turned around to go and leave the past behind him, finally. No regrets, this is what Min Hee would say to him if she was here. 

For Yixing, it felt like a burden was left from his shoulders. However, he caught himself thrice overthinking his decision. Was it truly the right choice? Was it right to leave her like that? His gaze fell on his phone display again. Two missed calls from Min Hee. He assumed it was urgent and called her right back, trying to find a place where he could hide temporarily.

"Why did you call? Did something happen?" Yixing asked on the phone and looked around to make sure he was unseen. "I couldn't answer your call because of some issues."

"I can't remember anymore. There was probably something I wanted to say, but I forgot. Make sure to go to the hospital for a check-up! I don't want to see you in the headlines again for fainting at the airport tomorrow. Don't try to run away, I informed the manager picking you up." Min Hee warned him, caus