In Between the Notes and Sighs
We Don't Sell Our Souls25: IN BETWEEN THE NOTES AND SIGHS
"Love Wave," by Lovewave
Yoongi’s brain was just on the shallow end of sleep when he heard a sound he vaguely registered as his phone ringing. A long, sleepy growl rumbled out of his throat as he flopped over on his side and fumbled around, feeling for his cellphone.
“Hello?”
“…um, hi. It’s pretty early, right?”
“Is this Ji Naeil?” Yoongi pulled the phone away from his ear and looked at the name. “Why’d you call so early? Something wrong?”
“I’m sorry, you can just go back to sleep. I don’t know why—”
“What’s up?”
Naeil didn’t answer immediately. The sounds at the other end of the phone told him she was moving around. “How about…a piano lesson today?”
Yoongi’s face crinkled in an expression somewhere between puzzlement and disgust. “A what now?”
“You know…like you said the other day…like…uh…”
“Naeil-ah, if you need something, you can just ask.”
That made her laugh awkwardly. It sounded halting and breathy through the phone.
“I couldn’t sleep much last night. I’m sorry I woke you up.”
It made sense, Yoongi thought, as he sat up. He wouldn’t be able to sleep either if he knew Sa Hyeo Pa had been going through his house. They could walk right back in whenever they wanted.
“Okay. Let’s meet at the church.”
There was a little pause, then Yoongi’s phone beeped. He looked at the screen in confusion. Did she just hang up on him? It made him chuckle. Naeil was a funny one. Sometimes he couldn’t tell if she was being shy or terse, considerate or arrogant, bold or stupid.
After stretching and yawning a few times, he looked back at his phone. The notification on the lock screen made him frown. Six missed calls from Jungkook? The kid hadn’t called him in at least two years. That couldn’t be good. Yoongi tapped on the icon and held the phone to his ear as he walked around looking for his sweater. There was no answer. “That punk,” muttered Yoongi. He calls for the first time in years and then doesn’t even answer when his call is returned. Yoongi called one more time but once again, received no answer.
On his way outside, he stopped to talk to Namjoon but couldn’t find him. With a shrug, Yoongi walked out the door.
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There’s a backroom no one knows about
It’s where you keep your skies
Your poems, fears, and lies
I’ve been there before, like you…
Yoongi didn’t want to walk any closer. He was afraid she would stop. He had never heard her voice before, and it surprised him. It was quiet, almost too quiet to hear over the wavering chords resonating from the piano. Her eyelids were almost closed, pupils vaguely gazing through her eyelashes at the fingers roaming over piano keys. The words slipped off her tongue easily while she played. They must be familiar to her, but they sounded strange to him.
Sure enough, before he could get a closer listen to the music, she noticed him. Her hands almost jumped off the piano and into her lap. A flush of pink was forming in her cheeks very quickly.
“Wh-why didn’t you tell me you were there?”
“Aigoo, calm down. It’s not like you have any right to tell me not to spy.” Yoongi leaned against the piano, eyes narrowing as he peered into her face. “So…what were you playing?”
“A song,” Naeil clipped, quickly backing away from him and getting up from the bench.
“A song...that you wrote?”
Naeil bit on her lip and looked away. Yoongi had never seen her so shy about something, and it amused him.
“It didn’t sound stupid,” he hummed, “If that’s what you were worried about.”
“That’s not—” Naeil cut herself off and shook her head. “Just forget it.”
Yoongi shrugged. “Whatever. What is it you wanted to talk about?”
A deep sigh came from Naeil as she collapsed onto the first pew. Yoongi followed, sitting down and turning to face her.
“I thought I could take it. I really did. I didn’t know how bad it would get, how quickly it would get bad. All I could think of last night was my mom, and how vulnerable she is just sitting there, waiting to—to die, I guess, I don’t—” Here Naeil stopped and breathed in slowly. “What I’m trying to say is...I don’t think I can wait until next semester to move. I think I need to...get away from my mom as soon as possible.”
“Oh, yeah, that’s fine, you can move in whenever you want.”
Naeil gaped. “Are you serious?”
“Yeah, but you might want to wait until you graduate so it isn’t too suspicious.”
“Oh. Wow. Um, okay.” Naeil began to stand up. “I feel like I called you here for nothing—”
Yoongi caught her arm…something he was getting too comfortable doing. Naeil glared him down until he let go, but at least he had her attention.
“Wait a second,” he said, holding up his hands defensively. “What about my piano lesson?”
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“Right, so, let’s accent beats one and two this time. Good, like that. Wow, you catch on so quickly.”
Naeil was beginning to feel like there was no reason to teach Yoongi. Everything came to him so naturally. Then again, she had never taught someone who was over the age of twelve or had any piano experience at all. But at this rate, Yoongi would quickly exceed her knowledge.
“Okay, so, this time I want you to just play that whole line normally. Focus on keeping those sixteenth notes steady—”
He was already playing. It was perfect. His fingers had to be twice as long as hers, and they were thin and lithe, jumping from key to key with a natural ease Naeil’s pudgy little fingers may never know. Naeil’s ears were ringing with pleasure.
“Are you sure you wanted me to teach you?”
Yoongi kept on playing. He probably hadn’t heard. He got so easily absorbed in his music.
“Wow this is great,” he said.
“Yeah, it is.”
“Thanks.”
Naeil scratched the back of her head. “Don’t think I did much...”
Yoongi finally stopped playing and looked up at her. His eyes were sparkling with a childlike gleam she had never seen in them before. “What do you mean? I’ve been working basically blind for the past…I don’t know, maybe ten years? This is so helpful.”
“You’re really talented. I can’t imagine what you’d sound like if you had the chance to study. You’d be in music school.”
Yoongi eyed Naeil, a smile spreading on his lips.
“Naeil-ah…I’ve never actually heard you play.”
Her pulse quickened. “Um...I haven’t...really been, you know, I haven’t had time to work on anyth—”
“How about that song you were playing when I came in?”
“That’s....you don’t want to hear that.”
“Actually, I kind of do.”
“I…I’ve never showed anyone anything I’ve written. It’s weird, and emotional. You don’t like emotions, do you?”
He dropped his hands in his lap and hopped up.
“How about this? How about, you play me that song, and then I’ll play you a song that I wrote.”
Naeil raised an eyebrow. “You sing?”
“Heh,” Yoongi snorted. “No, I don’t think you don’t want to hear that. I rap.”
“With piano?”
“You haven’t even heard me yet!”
“Fine.”
“Great! Piano’s all yours.”
“Wait I didn’t—”
Yoongi had already grabbed Naeil by the shoulders and was forcing her onto the piano bench. She waved her arms and thrashed about, doing her best to get away, but when faced with the alternative of falling on the hard floor, she finally landed on the bench.
She brushed middle C with her forefinger, playing the note over and over in an agitated manner.
“I…just…I don’t…”
There was something about playing for one person that Naeil couldn’t quite explain with words. It felt like opening up her heart and letting all of the contents fall out in front of them. She had cried in front of a piano more often than she had cried in front of her mom. Not the sort of thing she wanted to do in front of Yoongi. And yet, there was a part of her that itched to play. Just the idea made her heart pump. No one had ever asked to listen to her music before.
She could feel his expectant eyes on her, waiting. What would happen...if she just played?
Naeil put her fingers on the keys. She breathed out, closed her eyes for a moment, and let her fingers fall into the piano.
There’s a backroom no one knows about
It’s where you keep your skies
Your poems, fears, and lies
I’ve been there before, like you
They thought it was quiet
But it’s a bellowing riot
You know you’ll have to keep it down
You’ve got to keep it down
At some point, so quietly Naeil almost didn’t notice, Yoongi had moved closer to her. Without a word, he slipped onto the bench beside her, playing twinkling trills on the treble notes, following her chord progression with a smoothness that surprised her.
How did it fit so well? It was like he was answering every word she whispered into the keys. She had never felt that before, someone flowing along with her playing as easily as a leaf floating down a river. It was a beautiful sound. It was something new, thrilling, so exhilarating her heart was aching and humming at once. And the notes went on.
Because when the night comes you hide
And all of those tears that you cried
Dripped down in the dark, left undried
As all your soul screamed inside
I know how that you tried
So no one would see when you sighed
Back then you would smile when you lied
No one noticed you had died
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A leftover smile on remained Yoongi’s face as he walked through the door of Namjoon’s home. He couldn’t believe how much time he had spent at the piano with Naeil. It had been ages since he had been with someone besides one of the boys for hours on end. He had thought it was mostly because there was no one else he could tolerate. Maybe he was wrong.
The curtain separating the bedroom from the main area opened, and Namjoon came out. He stopped cold when his eyes met Yoongi’s. His expression was so full of dread that it immediately wiped the smile off of Yoongi’s face.
“Hyung…” gasped Namjoon. “Where the hell have you been?”
“What—what’s wrong?”
“Didn’t you even glance at your phone?”
Yoongi growled and stepped closer to Namjoon. “Kim Namjoon. What is wrong?”
“…Jungkook.” Namjoon bowed his head. “He’s been stabbed.”
Author’s Note
Lol I don't have time to write an author's note
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