I have never felt this deeply for someone.

Simply seeing him across campus makes my day, no matter how ty it started. Hearing his voice makes me feel like my heart is going to jump out of my chest or explode anytime soon, and being anywhere near him makes me feel  hella nervous as I think of different ways on how to present myself decently without looking creepy and ugly and ty at the same time.

Don’t get me wrong though. I’m not in love, I just happened to have a strong feeling of attraction towards a certain guy. How can you fall in love with someone you don’t even know?

I can still remember how we first met— or how I first met him. I was a freshman, he was a sophomore that year. Since I am the kind of person that isn’t fond of human interaction, I chose to sit at the back with my two good friends, Minhyun and Jaehwan. Ever since the previous semester, we always chose seats at the back so we can do whatever we wanted when we feel bored or sleepy. It was also an excuse for me to watch everyone who goes inside the room since watching people entertains me in a way I cannot explain.

How he looked that day as he entered the classroom half-filled with people is still clear to me— a plain black baseball cap and a black and white striped sweatshirt tucked messily in his faded black jeans. At first I wasn’t able to see his face clearly, however, what intrigued me the most were the three moles on his left cheek. They looked like a constellation, and it stood out from his pale skin. As soon as he took off his cap, I thought, ‘is it even possible for someone to be this beautiful?’. He chose the seat in front of Jaehwan, who was busy playing games in his phone as he continuously asked me what I wanted to eat for lunch. I didn’t answer him because I was too busy staring at the beautiful person in front of me so Minhyun was the one who made the choice.

He looked perfect. Heck, even his name sounds beautiful— Ong Seongwoo.

And when he smiled (even though it wasn’t really for me), my heart skipped a beat. That was when I realized that there would be an actual reason for me to want to go to school starting that day.

But.. the more I get close to him, the more I realize that we’re from two different worlds, and that maybe, our paths were never really meant to cross.